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THE VOW OF A LIE

JARED

S eeing the way Lerna embraced Koro, forced a question from me.

“Why do I get the impression that you know my wife?”

The response was one that felt as if the rug was being pulled from under me, before trying to fucking suffocate me.

“Because she was never your wife… but , she has always been mine.”

Wife… his fucking wife.

What… The… Fuck?!

I swear, my mind could barely process the arsehole’s words. Hence why instead of standing around with my mouth on the ground, feeling like the biggest fucking idiot ever, I scoffed.

“Your wife… oh right, but of course she fucking is, why the fuck not?!” I shouted.

The irony of it all was like being struck with venom I had first begged the snake to bite me with. I tossed the sword that I had picked up, ready to use to save her life, to the ground. This before walking away from this fucked up lie of a life she had spun me. Like a fucking fool.

A fool that had believed myself to be in love.

All these fucking years.

Every single one I wasted.

Oh yeah, it was a bitter pill to swallow alright. It was a fucking grenade of mockery that exploded in the pit of my stomach. That’s what it fucking was!

“J… hey, J, wait up… where are you going, brother?” Orthrus asked, now catching up with me.

“Where do you think? To find my woman,” I snarled.

“And what about…”

“I don’t give a shit! They can do as they fucking please!” I told him angrily as my mind spun in a million fucking directions.

“We both know that’s not true,” my brother said, making me stop so as I could grab him by the shoulder, gripping him tightly and walking him backwards.

“Listen to my words, Orth … I… Do… Not… Fucking… Care!” I growled out each word, making him raise his hands in surrender. So, I let him go and carried on walking. Of course, I should have known it would take more than that to shut my brother up on the matter.

“But you know, that’s some heavy shit you just heard and…”

“Fuck sake, you just don’t quit, do you?” I moaned, scrubbing a frustrated hand down my face, tempted to add claws.

“No, I don’t, but that’s beside the point.”

“What do you wanna hear, Orth? How I wasted over three hundred years on a fucking lie?! You wanna hear how many days I wasted trying to get her back? How many hours I wasted thinking about her, or how many fucking minutes I spent fucking hating myself for getting her killed?!” I bellowed, knowing that they could hear but I didn’t give a flying fuck. My last fuck given had already fucked off and left me.

“Okay, so maybe I see your point,” he conceded.

“Great… good talk, brother,” I said dryly, storming back towards the way we had been traveling before this fucked up drama.

“But aren’t you even curious as to find out why?” he asked, making me roll my eyes as I should have known the tenacious fucker wouldn’t let it go. And I just knew what Ella would be saying right now, asking me if that was enough fucks and well… no it fucking wasn’t. Hence why I replied with,

“No, couldn’t give a fuck.” And it was true. Right now, I couldn’t have given two shits as to what bullshit excuse for fucking up my life she gave me.

“That’s not…”

“No, Orth, just fucking no!” I barked at him, making him shake his head at me.

“But why?”

“Because the only thing I care about is getting my Ella back. That is the only Gods be damned thing that matters to me, so this…” I paused to lash my hand out to the shit I left behind, “…This fucked up bullshit, it means nothing to me. She… that lie I once called wife … she was dead to me before, and she sure as shit is dead to me now… you got it?” I seethed, making him sigh before finally… fucking finally, letting this go.

“Yeah, I got it, brother.”

“Good, now let’s go get my Chosen One back,” I stated, feeling my HellBeast rumble his agreement. Orthrus nodded, and this time as we walked, he did so by keeping the rest of his opinions to himself. Because every word I said was true. Right now, was not the time for this rabbit hole of my past. And if I were to dig right down in there, then yes, I knew I wanted to know what the fuck was happening. I had a million questions churning like fire in my gut. But seeing as I knew none of them would ease the pain of being lied to, of being deceived, then what good would come of it now? I was so close to the surface of erupting. My anger and resentment, my bitter rage ready to be unleashed from a single word uttered.

What was the use of it when I knew I was not in the right mind to listen?

The question now was…

Would I ever be?

* * *

Only minutes later and this question was answered, as it seemed I had no choice, not when she gave me none. It turned out that Koro hadn’t just been interested in retrieving his wife, after all. The distain I felt when even thinking the word, had me growling under my breath.

“Jared, can we… can we please talk?” She huffed, trying to keep up with me. Her angelic beauty not something I bothered to look at, as there was no getting lost in her aquamarine blue eyes this time, no marveling at her white-blonde hair. There was no asking myself how fucking lucky I had been to possess such beauty. Not knowing now that she had used it like a cruel weapon against me. A way to play me like her fucking puppet.

“You can, doesn’t mean I have to listen,” I said, my tone speaking for itself.

“I understand how you must…”

I stopped walking and snarled, “I suggest you not finish that sentence, girl!”

She flinched back, and I glanced to the side to see Koro take a step towards us. Once upon a time, I might have felt guilty lashing out at her like that, but not anymore. And as for Koro, I was hoping for the son of a bitch to make it the rest of the way over here. I would welcome him with my fist. Unfortunately, he didn’t move any closer, and I glanced down to see Lerna shaking a hand at him to stop. I snarled before telling her,

“Run along to your husband.” Then I continued walking, my brother and Marcus both watching this exchange with keen interest. However, the silly girl didn’t take my advice, instead rushing once more to keep up with me. Something I refused to make easy for her. So, I kept my long strides as they were, wishing I could just fucking run if it wouldn’t have been so gods damn obvious.

“I know I hurt you and for that…”

“What? You’re sorry…? A bit fucking late for that, Lerna,” I snapped, her name now feeling like swallowing sand.

I heard her sigh next to me before admitting,

“What is it that mortals say, better late than never.”

I scoffed. “I would rather have taken the never, so make of that what you will,” I replied, making her wince next to me.

“Yes, well clearly fate has other ideas, and if I am to save my…”

I stopped her right there, snapping,

“What? Your soul?! Your soul is not one I give a fuck about right now, so no, if it’s forgiveness you’re after, then you are wasting your breath.”

She faltered in her steps like I had struck her. But even this hadn’t been enough to get her to take the hint, as she caught up with me again.

“What if it told you that I had no choice!” she exclaimed, making me shake my head at her.

“So, what…? You were forced to pretend to love me, is that it?” I asked, hating myself for doing so.

“I had to get close to you, at first I thought it could be as a friend, but I think my connection to her must have made you…”

I ignored her bullshit excuse and was once again interrupting her.

“Made me what? Foolishly fall in love with a girl who was nothing but my enemy?” I challenged, making her sigh.

“I was never your enemy, Jared.” The sound of my name coming from her lips was just like I used to remember, just like I used to adore… Now, though…? It just grated against my bitter soul.

“No? Then it wasn’t you who planned my demise?” I questioned, making her scoff.

“Oh, but I hardly think having you become who you were destined to become can be considered as a demise,” she argued.

“Oh, I see, so you did me a favor then?” I asked sarcastically.

“Didn’t I?”

I gritted my teeth and snapped my reply.

“I had no fucking choice, Lerna, you ripped it from me, you and your actual husband!”

Again, she sighed, as if getting frustrated.

“Yes, and have you thought to ask yourself why?”

I had, but I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of this.

“It doesn’t exactly matter now, does it? Seeing as I am stuck in Hell with the both of you!” I growled, my eyes casting to the fucker, Koro, who was watching this scene of ours with a narrow gaze.

Yeah, come and try it, fucker.

I tensed my jaw. I swear I would have no fucking teeth left after this conversation.

“You always were stubborn,” she muttered, making me warn,

“Don’t… don’t you fucking dare act like you know me.”

“Don’t I?”

I glared down at her before telling her in a hard tone,

“No, you don’t. A lot has happened since those days and I am very, very different, Lerna.”

“I can see that,” she said, looking me up and down, noting my demonic appearance. One I hadn’t bothered to try and tame. Not that it did me any good as the little fool just wouldn’t take the fucking hint. I knew that, when she continued.

“Yes, and like I said, you are now who you always were fated to become, I just played a part in that.”

“A fucking cruel part,” I gritted out through clenched teeth.

“You may feel that way but…”

“Oh, but I do feel that way, and have you ever thought to ask yourself why?” I said, interrupting her and making her shake her head, like this would help.

“Jared, I…”

I finally stopped walking and turned to face her, because if she wanted to do this shit, then here it was… she would get it all!

“I watched you die, Lerna . I was forced to watch the woman I thought I loved die… do you have any idea what that’s like!?”

“I do actually,” she replied, surprising me, but it wasn’t enough to make me stop.

“Yeah, well fucking multiply it by three hundred years and you might be where I am at!” I snapped, making her gasp in shock, making me wish I hadn’t given her that.

“Jared, I… I didn’t know,” she uttered quietly, and I hated her even more for it… the pity.

“No, you didn’t. Just like you didn’t know that I spent every one of those years searching for you. Spent every one trying to bring you back. Spent them all feeling guilty, every fucking day of this immortal life!”

“Oh, Jared, I…”

“A guilt that I never once needed to feel… but you did ,” I said, nodding at her before carrying on, for there was no stopping me now. “You were the one who should have felt that, but I was the one to carry that pain, Lerna, not you. I was the one who blamed myself every damn day, when the truth is , you were to blame for it all.” Again, I nodded down to her, emphasizing my point, and at the very least she looked pained by it.

“I did feel guilty, Jared,” she told me, and once upon a time I might have believed her. But not now. Fool me once and all that shit.

“Good, then now it’s yours to carry alone, for… I… Am… Done,” I said, stopping long enough to snarl each word venomously. Then I started walking in earnest. But damn it, the stupid girl just wouldn’t fucking quit!

“It is no use, he won’t listen, Lerna,” I heard Koro tell her.

“You’re damn right, listen to your husband, girl, and let his curse console you!” I shouted back, tossing an arm up over my head in an ‘I don’t give a fuck’ gesture. My brother and Marcus caught up with me, but I didn’t miss the way Lerna said,

“You have to get your brother to listen!”

“For you, lady, I don’t have to do shit,” Orth replied before Marcus said,

“No hard feelings, love, we just hate you, is all.”

I scoffed a laugh at that. But then the moment they joined me, this was when Lerna had hit her limit, as she shouted at me,

“And what about my sister!”

“Your sister?” my brother asked.

“We need to find her!” she snapped, making me roll my eyes, because of course there was something she wanted from me. Hence why I was now dealing with this bullshit now. Which was why I said,

“Yeah, good luck with that.”

“Good luck with that?!”

I turned, walking backwards whilst I told her,

“Yeah, but hey, if it isn’t obvious yet, then here it is… I don’t give a shit about your sister.” Then I held up my arms and shrugged in a cocky way she seethed at. Koro strangely smirked as she stomped towards me in angry little strides, showing me a side of her I hadn’t ever seen before. But then again, who the fuck knew who she was, as I sure as shit didn’t … obviously.

“Oh, I doubt that!” she snapped.

I frowned, turning back to face the way of the snowy mountains before I shouted back,

“I don’t even fucking know your sister, so why would I…”

“But that’s not true, is it? Especially seeing as it’s the very reason you’re here now!” she said, this time making all three of us stop dead at the same time.

Then I turned around slowly, feeling as if my HellBeast veins had been doused in ice.

Ice that grew shards the moment she said,

“To save Ella…”

“…My sister.”