Page 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

H ours later, I sat in the quiet of our small cottage, emotions swirling inside like a storm I couldn’t calm. Even a long soak in the bath had done nothing to settle the ache twisting through me. The fight with Caelum replayed in my mind, every harsh word a bruise I couldn’t stop pressing on.

I stared into the flickering fire in the hearth, my thoughts scattered, while my mother busied herself over a pot of stew. Mannix lay on the floor next to my chair, pressing against my leg, trying to comfort me. I gave his head a quick pat, thankful for his attempt.

My mother glanced over, her perceptive gaze catching every crack in my facade. “That scowl of yours could scare away a whole village,” she said gently, coming to sit beside me.

I sighed, fingers tracing patterns on the rough wood of the table. “Or one infuriating crown prince,” I murmured, barely able to voice it. “And that’s the least of our concerns. The council is useless, more concerned about themselves and the fae’s promises than in saving the magic of Eyre. Tomorrow is the winter solstice, and I don’t know how to fix it.”

Worry shadowed her face.

“I don’t even know if I’m doing the right thing,” I continued. “I’ve fought so hard, but all I do is push people away—especially Caelum.”

She got up to stir the stew she was making. “Have my old ears deceived me, or am I sensing your distaste for that highborn has softened?”

“He wasn’t what I expected.” My heart squeezed at the memory of his angry face at the hollow tree. “He’s more my equal than anyone I’ve ever known.”

She gave a soft chuckle. “Well, that’s a shame, then, since he’s returning to the capital city tomorrow. I would’ve loved to visit more with someone who could match you .”

“Tomorrow?” I managed, fighting to keep my voice steady.

She nodded, her lips turned downward. “With the risk of witches and mages leaving to join the fae, he’ll want to discuss strategy at the capital, among other duties I’m sure he needs to get back to.”

Like getting married. The thought was a vicious thorn snagged deep in my side.

The weight of regret tightened my chest as I stared into the fire again. My thoughts strayed to my father, to the countless trips I took with him across Eyre before everything fell apart. I never understood why he stopped taking me toward the end, no matter how much I pleaded.

“Why did he stop?” I murmured.

She looked at me, confused. “Who?”

“Father. Why did he stop taking me with him on his research trips,” I said, the words tumbling out. “Before he...before everything happened. I always thought it was because he didn’t trust me, or that I was holding him back. But now...” I searched her face, hoping for some clarity. “Was it something else?”

Her stirring slowed, the wooden spoon resting against the rim of the pot. “You were never holding him back, Eedy,” she said softly. “If anything, he wanted to protect you.”

“From what?” I asked, my brows knitting together.

She hesitated, her eyes flicking to the fire before settling back on me. “He saw something in Velarune,” she said, “in the Pool of Desire.”

“What did he see?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

“I don’t know,” she admitted, her expression clouding with old memories. “He never told me all the details. But whatever it was, it scared him. He said it was tied to the ley line—and to you. Something that foreshadowed you being taken away because of a problem with the magic. He wanted to keep you safe until he could understand it more.”

I swallowed hard, the crackling of the fire eating up the silence.

I shook my head, bitterness coursing through me. “He should’ve told me. He should’ve given me the choice.”

“Yes, he should’ve,” she said with a sigh, coming to sit next to me at the table. “Men don’t always make the best choices when it comes to that. It’s hard-wired in them to protect, defend. They always think they know best.”

I nodded, though my heart felt heavy. The truth didn’t bring the comfort I’d expected, but it gave me something else: resolve. Whatever my father had seen, whatever he’d feared, I couldn’t let it stop me from fighting still for a solution.

My mother reached out, her hand warm and steady as it rested on mine. “Maybe this is the first time you’re realizing it, Eedy, but he wasn’t a perfect man. No one is without flaws. But he loved you. Very much. And he was proud of you every day of his life.”

He was proud of me.

My throat tightened, and I leaned my head against her shoulder, holding back more tears. Despite all my turmoil about what happened and agonizing over why he did what he did, I think I always knew he was proud. Whereas...

Caelum.

My thoughts circled back to him, to the hurt I’d caused. I couldn’t let him leave with so much left unsaid. I owed him an apology at the very least—a chance to make things right. And if he didn’t want to help me find a solution to the magic problem anymore, I could at least give him a proper goodbye.

Before leaving, I grabbed one of my everflame lanterns, recalling the last time I’d entered his tent, his candles burned down low. Maybe he could take this one thing back with him to his home in Tridus, to remember me.

My heart shivered at the thought, but still, I gathered up my things and ventured out into the cold.

I took a steadying breath as I approached his tent. The air was frigid, finding every nook and cranny of me left exposed to the elements. I peered inside the tent, still gathering my courage, and I could see his silhouette moving as he packed his belongings, no servants or help. Doing it all on his own. Alone. I braced myself, dread and anticipation twisting together.

“Caelum,” I called softly from the entrance, and he turned. His face was guarded, his eyes unreadable.

“I didn’t expect to see you tonight, Miss Blackthorn,” he said, his voice carrying a chill that made me wince.

I was Miss Blackthorn again. We were formal, unattached once more. My chest tightened, but still I forced myself to walk inside.

He looked every bit the prince again—his hair perfectly combed, his clothes and face without a trace of dirt or disorder on them. The wild, adventurous man from before was gone, replaced by this polished, distant version of himself, the one he’d been coerced into becoming his whole life.

Would the awe and wonder he had for the world fade when they pushed a crown into his hands? Would he go back to Tridus and become someone I wouldn’t recognize?

My heart shuddered at the thought.

“I...I wanted to give you something.” I held out the lantern. “For your journey back to the capital.”

He took it, examining the everflame glowing inside. “Is this one of yours? Made from lightning?”

I nodded while studying the floor, finding it hard to speak, to look him in the eye.

“How long will this flame last?” he whispered.

Forever, I thought, my heart clenching. “A ring. Maybe longer,” I said instead.

I heard the scrape of the lantern as he placed it on his desk.

“Thank you, Eedy,” he replied.

My name returning to his lips made my heart do backflips, and I had to look up.

Caelum was looking at me now too, but it was accompanied by a frown and a rigid posture. My heart plummeted, afraid that this was how it ended. That this was the last memory I would get of him, a cold and lifeless stare.

Don’t be a coward, Eedy. He is worth so much more than your pride.

I took a steadying breath. “Caelum, I didn’t just come to give you the lantern.” My voice wavered, but I pressed on. “I came to apologize.”

He tilted his head and crossed his arms, as if warring with himself over whether he wanted to hear it, but he finally raised his eyebrows expectantly.

“For the things I said, the way I’ve treated you.” I took a tentative step closer. “When we met, I judged you unfairly. I told myself that your title and wealth made your life easy, that you couldn’t possibly understand what it’s like to struggle, to lose . But these past weeks you’ve shown me how wrong I was.”

He remained silent. Still, I owed him this, so I pushed forward before I lost my nerve.

“I s ee you now, Caelum. I see someone who is resourceful, who can adapt and endure in ways I couldn’t have imagined. Someone who fights not because it’s expected of him, but because it’s the right thing to do. You’re resilient, strong. And I...”

I swallowed hard, the words catching in my throat. “I realize now that it wasn’t you I was angry at. It was me. I clung to those old, cruel ideas because it was easier than admitting the truth—that maybe I’m not worthy of you .”

His brows furrowed, and for a moment, the hard edges of his expression softening. But I wasn’t finished.

“I’m so sorry for what I said to you,” I continued, emotion welling up in my throat. “Those words were lies, and I said them because I was scared. Scared of what I felt for you. Scared of what it would mean if I let myself want you, knowing I couldn’t have you. I thought pushing you away would hurt less than losing you, but I see now that it only made everything worse.”

I let out a shaky breath. “You deserved better from me, Caelum. You still do. And in case we never see each other again after tonight, I just...I needed you to know that.”

Silence stretched, heavy and uncertain, as I waited for him to speak. His gaze flicked over my face, and I fought the urge to look away. Then, slowly, his arms fell to his sides as he took a step closer.

“Do you really mean that?” His eyes shimmered like a blue wave in the sunlight. “ All of it?”

“Yes,” I whispered. “Every word.”

His shoulders relaxed, the tension in his frame melting away as he reached for me. “Come here, Tempest.”

I didn’t hesitate. I closed the gap between us in a few quick strides, stepping into his arms. He wrapped me in his warmth, the familiar scent of pine grounding me even as it made my heart ache. I pressed my face against his chest, letting the steady rhythm of his heartbeat calm the storm inside me.

“We all make mistakes, Eedy,” he murmured against my hair, “but don’t think for one moment that you aren’t worthy of me. You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. Come to think of it, maybe I misspoke earlier. Maybe I yearn to be the dirt under your boots, if only for the chance to be near you.”

I laughed as tears slipped down my cheeks. I tried to pull back, embarrassed, but he held me tighter, his hand rubbing soothing circles on my back.

“I’m grateful for the time I had with you, Caelum,” I murmured against him. “I won’t soon forget it.”

He sighed. “That sounds like a goodbye.”

I didn’t confirm or deny it. I’d already bled myself out, the pain in my chest growing sharper. He was not mine to claim, and he never would be.

He let me pull back enough so he could see my face and wiped the tears from my cheek with his thumb, his touch so tender it made my whole chest ache. “I must apologize to you as well,” he said, his brow furrowed. “I should’ve explained myself more before all that happened in the tree. I should’ve told you?—”

“Please, don’t, Caelum,” I interrupted, shaking my head. I had already cracked open the contents of my heart and spilled them before him. If he declared his feelings were even remotely close to mine, I would not recover when he left.

“You are betrothed to another,” I whispered, jealousy rising untethered from deep within my core. “You said you wanted to be a loyal person, and?—”

“I am loyal,” he said, gripping me tighter. “Just not to her .”

That wasn’t good enough. It would never be good enough.

No matter how much I wanted him now, I knew what I needed. “I cannot be the woman on the side, Caelum. You cannot have a tempest and a queen.”

“I’ll admit it, Eedy. I do want both. But I want them to be one and the same.”

I shook my head, confused.

“That’s why I sent a crow as soon as I stepped out of the council meeting,” he continued, “informing the duke of the end of my engagement to his daughter. When you looked straight at me in that chamber and said we all have a choice, I knew what mine needed to be. I wanted to tell you, but you were so upset about the meeting and all that talk about your father, and when you kissed me, I lost all other thoughts in my head, and...”

My heart stopped as he trailed off. I touched my own lips, remembering. “Are you saying that when I kissed you ...”

He nodded, his fingers curling into my waist more. “I was only yours then.”

All the breath I had in me left my lungs. “But your uncle, he?—”

“I’m no longer afraid of him and his consequences.” He ran one palm down the side of my face. “I’m not alone anymore.”

I gripped at his shirt, unsure of what I’d just heard. Did the crown prince of Eyre say he broke off his engagement to the daughter of a duke...for me ?

“Now,” Caelum continued, tilting my chin so that I had no choice but to be pierced through with his blue eyes. “Eedy Blackthorn. Will you have this freshly bachelored prince or not?”

YES, I wanted to scream. Dear gods, yes . Still, my mind scrambled to find the right hook that would hit me later. For a reason this wouldn’t work.

“B-but the law, Caelum,” I said, stuttering. “Maybe we can be together for tonight. Not forever.”

“Ye of little faith,” he scoffed, skimming his hands up and down my back until they anchored on my hips and tugged me closer, eliminating all remaining space between us. “Do you not know by now how charming I can be? That I always find a way to get what I want? Do not doubt me.” He leaned in until his hot mouth was murmuring into the shell of my ear. “I can make you a queen, Tempest.”

My breath hitched. Words would not form as this surreal fantasy unfolded before me. But he was staring at me, expectantly, burning like a thousand flames only for me.

And there was nothing I liked more than telling him when he was wrong right to his smug face.

“If you’re going to be spouting off reckless promises to me, I need to correct some of your assumptions,” I said, nudging his nose with mine. “I never wished to be a queen, Caelum,” I stroked both of my hands along the sides of his face, my lips brushing against his as I spoke. He groaned, squeezing me tighter. “The only thing I ever wanted to be was yours .”

And then I was kissing him. Not a prince. Not a stranger. Just Caelum . He was delicious. He was deviant. He was daring. And soon, all of Eyre would also know he was mine .