Page 11 of The Grumpy Vet (Vet Shop Boys Down Under #3)

Linus

For a grumpy bastard like me, I'd have expected maintaining a neutral face to be easy. It should be second nature, a talent so well-developed I could list it in the special skills section of my résumé.

But as Oakey fills me in on his theory about Dario being in love with Ryde, my heart is pounding, my chest feels hot, and I'm not sure if I'm succeeding in keeping my emotions off my face.

"You're looking about as sceptical as Ryde did when I told him,"

Oakey says with a light chuckle.

"Know something I don't?"

"What? No. Don't be silly. Here, Cluck Norris."

I use feeding time as a welcome distraction to avoid having to stare my best mate in the face. Been doing a lot of that this past week, and I'm surprised—but glad—he hasn't picked up on anything.

As far as I'm aware, he doesn't suspect a thing. Well, at least not the real thing. I don't know where he got this idea about Dario being in love with Ryde from. I mean, if he is, he's done a bloody good job of hiding it. I haven't picked up on anything.

Oakey shoots me a knowing grin.

"I know a thing or two about someone being secretly in love with their friend."

I empty out the water container and turn the hose on to refill it.

"Don't know what you're talking about."

He laughs, and once I've placed the water back in place, I smile, too.

"That was a long time ago,"

I remind him.

So I may have had a little crush on Oakey when I met him during my vet studies in Sydney.

I was young, naive, and this was in the era when going online meant enduring the annoying whine of a dial-up modem for a few painful minutes.

He was my landlord, and I read too much into things, thought there might've been mutual feelings, and ended up making a fool of myself courtesy of one especially awkward candlelit dinner.

Thankfully, Oakey's a cool guy.

We moved past it and went on to become best friends.

"It's been good seeing you,"

he says, changing the topic, much to my relief.

I scatter a few treats around and look over at him, smiling.

"Been good to see you, too."

"I have to say, I wasn't expecting you to be so…I don't know. What's the opposite of a miserable prick?"

I chuckle. He's not wrong there. Despite not liking seeing less of the guys since Oakey showed up, overall, I guess I am, I don't know, happier?

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Well, running the clinic is as hard and time-consuming as it always is. And then on top of that, you've got all the stuff that's going on with your father. I thought it'd be affecting you more. I secretly dropped in to check in on you. Make sure you aren't drowning and doing that thing you do when you don't tell anyone you're drowning."

I walk over and stand beside him, keeping my eyes trained on the roosters pecking and scratching about excitedly.

"You're not entirely wrong. I'm barely scraping by with the clinic."

He shoots me a concerned look.

"You haven't been dipping into your own money again to cover expenses, have you?"

I keep staring straight ahead, my jaw set tight.

"I'm not not going to pay my staff, Oakey. They all work bloody hard."

He exhales through his nose.

"You know that if you ever need mon?—"

"Thank you, but no."

It's not the first time he's offered, and it's not the first time I've refused. I have my pride.

"I'll get through it. I always do."

"God, you're a stubborn prick."

"Thank you."

I nudge him with my elbow, and he just rolls his eyes.

"And the Dad thing, well, what can I do? It is what it is. He's going to deteriorate, and my job is to make sure the process is as smooth and painless as it can be."

"How are you feeling about it? I know you guys have a complicated past."

"That's putting it mildly."

I swipe a hand through my hair and notice The Man picking at Sunny.

"Oi, knock it off, you two,"

I growl, and they stop right away. I stay silent for a while, keeping a close eye on the brood, letting my emotions move through me.

"I don't think he and I are going to have that movie moment where we get closure or whatever."

"He's from a different generation, mate. Blokes out here weren't encouraged to talk about emotions. Heck, they weren't even allowed to have them in the first place. He's a product of that time."

"He very much is."

"And I'm sure he loves you."

When I quirk a brow, Oakey adds, "Take this from a dad. You always love your kids. No matter what. And I'm sure your father was proud of you. You've never set a foot wrong. You followed in his footsteps and took over the clinic. You're a great vet. A good person."

A good person?

If he knew what his son and I have been getting up to, I doubt he'd be saying that. My face tightens, and Oakey holds me in his gaze with a contemplative stare that only makes me more uneasy. Just thinking about Ryde in his presence is too close for my liking. I feel like I'm doing something wrong, and that doesn't sit right with me because when the three of us are together, it feels so right.

"You sure you're okay?"

he asks, lowering his voice.

"Yep. Fine."

I avoid looking at him then shut the gate a little more forcefully than necessary. We start walking back towards the house in silence. I don't like keeping what we've been doing from Oakey, but Ryde and I have never discussed how, when, or even if, we should bring it up with him. Personally, I feel a responsibility to break it to him, but Ryde might have other ideas. And if he does, I'll respect his wishes. They are family, after all.

"I should get going,"

Oakey says, giving me a clap on the shoulder when we reach the back steps.

"Ryde's making dinner. You want to come over and join us?"

"Nah. I'm good."

"Aw, come on. Ryde's a whizz in the kitchen, just like his old man."

The pride in his voice hits me right in the proverbial guts. There's a reason why I've been declining Oakey's invites for me to hang out with him and his son, and it's called guilt. Massive, overflowing, container loads of guilt. Oakey may have been cool with my little crush on him all those years ago, but what Ryde, Dario, and I have been getting up to is a whole other thing. I can't imagine how he'll react, but I suspect it won't be well.

"All right, mate."

He bundles me in for a hug.

"Call me if you need anything. Or just want to chat."

"I will,"

I say, clapping his back.

"I'll be sure to tell Ryde to keep an extra close eye on you, mister,"

he says, smiling as he walks away, and I just pray my stubble manages to contain most of the blush his words have caused.

"Did your dad get off okay this morning?"

I ask the next morning at the clinic.

Ryde looks across at me from the table in the staff lounge and frowns.

"Please don't use the terms your dad and get off in the same sentence again."

His eyes drift to the doorway, likely checking for signs of anyone coming down the hallway.

"Especially given the current situation."

The tops of my ears go warm.

"Roger that."

Ryde takes a bite of his sandwich, chews it thoughtfully, then says, "Dario and I were thinking of coming over for a gym sesh this arvo."

"I know."

I lift my phone off the table and wave it at him.

"He texted."

"Is that cool?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't it be?"

"No, I mean…"

His eyes slide to the doorway again.

"Is it cool cool?"

I take a sip of tea and wrap my palms around the warm mug. We haven't had a chance to properly talk during Oakey's visit, but I've been wondering if putting a pause on things has changed anything. Will it sober us all up, make us realise that if we can't tell Oakey about it, maybe that's a clear sign that what we're doing is…well, not wrong exactly, but maybe not a hundred percent right, either?

"What do you guys think?" I ask.

He shrugs.

"Dunno. Dario and I haven't had much of a chance to talk with Dad around. He already thinks things."

"Things about Dario?"

His eyebrows lift in surprise.

"He told you?"

I nod then take another sip.

"Yeah, yesterday."

"What did you say?"

"Not much. Caught me off guard, to be honest."

"Yeah. Same."

He pauses.

"Do you think he's right?"

I finish off my tea before answering.

"Hard to tell. Only Dario can truly answer that question. Are you going to bring it up with him?"

He sighs.

"I don't know. I'm still so surprised. Now I'm replaying all of our interactions, looking for any clues or signs that might indicate something…more."

Another sigh.

"Should I talk to him?"

"Rumour has it, talking is a good thing,"

I say with a half grin.

"Talking is hard, though. Look at us."

I take my mug to the sink.

"Tell me about it."

A few seconds later, Ryde joins me.

"This whole situation is confusing. You and me. Dario and me. Dario, you, and me."

"It is a lot,"

I agree, giving the mug a quick rinse under some warm water.

"But we're all big boys now. This is a part of life."

Ryde sneaks a quick glance towards the doorway then brushes his hand up and down my arm, sending a flare of warmth all the way up to my shoulder.

"I'm glad you and I are talking. Sorry it took so long."

"Don't be sorry. I'm equally to blame. More so, if you think about it."

"Because you're old…"

When he sees my not-amused expression, he swiftly adds, "…older."

"Exactly."

We stare at each other for a moment, and my chest goes all light and fuzzy. I've missed him this past week. Him and Dario. More than I thought I would. More than I wanted. It'd be so much easier if I didn't, but I can't help it.

"Come over for a workout this afternoon, and the three of us can talk."

He gets a suggestive glint in his eye.

"Just talk?"

"Who knows? But if you want to raise what your dad said with Dario and need some support, just know I'm in your corner, okay."

"Thanks, Linus."

He lifts those gorgeous ocean-blue eyes to meet mine.

"That means a lot."

"Enough for you to go easy on us during our training session? Or me, specifically?"

He bursts out into an evil cackle.

"Ha. Not. A. Chance."

Dario

Today's workout session has been…weird.

Ryde and I got to Linus's place, opened up the roller door, and he instructed me to start with a five-minute warm-up. Then Linus joined us. Ryde immediately got him doing some dynamic stretches. We then proceeded to spend the next forty minutes barely stopping as Ryde had us doing round after round of squats, push-ups, and progressively heavier weights.

What I'm saying is he actually made us work out.

Banter and chitchat were kept to a minimum—mainly because it's hard to talk while your muscles are burning and you're panting for breath like a dingo in the outback. The vibe was off compared to normal.

Not necessarily bad, just…different.

When he's finally done torturing us, Ryde hands us each a foam roller. I start with my calves, pressing them into the roller and feeling the tension slowly release, before making my way up my legs and onto my back. I find a sore spot right in between my shoulder blades and work into it, breathing through the discomfort in short puffs.

"Take it easy,"

he instructs Linus.

"Don't want to flare up your quad issue."

Linus just grunts, his chest heaving, no doubt as exhausted as I am. We take one week off, and we're both hurting badly. It's almost enough to make a person want to keep exercising.

As much fun as it is to pay out on Ryde for how seriously he takes this, the results do speak for themselves. I've lost weight, gained muscle, and am way more defined. At this rate, my abs should be making a welcome return in the not-too-distant future.

Not that either one of these guys seems to care about that as much as I do. I still think about the moment when we were about to blow Linus in the shower—I was hit by a wave of self-doubt so strong it almost bowled me over. I did not want to take that shirt off, convinced the sight of shirtless me would turn them off.

But it didn't.

They both like my body just as it is, a work in progress, and since that moment in the shower, whenever I've been catching my reflection in the mirror in the bathroom or when I get changed, I don't suck my stomach in or do that thing where I angle my body to the side to make it seem leaner. I think I might be starting to be okay just as I am.

"What's on your mind?"

Ryde asks me once we've finished and he's putting the foam rollers away.

"Uh, nothing."

He looks at Linus who looks to me, so I shift my gaze to Ryde to continue the looking loop.

"All right."

Linus claps his hands.

"The three of us need to talk. I'll grab some beers and meet you two at the bench near the roosters. Go."

He shoos us out of the carport, closes the roller down behind us, and heads for his house while Ryde and I make our way to the rooster pen.

"Any idea what's on his mind?" I ask.

His mouth makes a shape as if to speak, but nothing comes out on the first try. "Dunno,"

he eventually manages.

We sit down on the wooden bench, and a few moments later, Linus joins us with a clinking bag of beers in one hand and a foldout chair in the other. He opens one bottle at a time, handing one first to me, then to Ryde, and then taking one for himself as he settles into the chair.

We sip our beers in silence but not for long.

"All right,"

Linus says.

"Let's talk. I'll start."

Ryde and I exchange a look.

"Are you okay, Linus?"

I ask, half joking, half not since this is not a guy who readily starts a conversation.

"I am. Clearer than I have been in a long time, actually. First item on today's agenda."

He tips his beer bottle towards Ryde.

"Your father. To say I have mixed feelings about his visit is an understatement. I hated lying to him and not telling him about…er…us. But I also value my life and would like to be able to continue, you know, living it. What about you guys?"

I'm stunned. I don't think I've ever heard that many words come out of Linus's mouth all at once.

Ryde answers first.

"Same. A lot of mixed emotions. I hated not being honest with him since I always tell him pretty much everything. But I'm also relieved he didn't find out. Then I feel guilty about that, and it's all a bit of a mess."

"It is,"

Linus agrees with a nod.

"And you, Dario?"

"This doesn't affect me as much as it does you guys, so I'm just glad things went well, but it sucks you guys are going through it and there's nothing I can do."

A warm smile lights up Linus's dark-hazel eyes.

"Just you saying that helps."

"It does,"

Ryde agrees.

"Thank you."

I shrug, feeling awkward because it's not like I'm doing anything special.

"Okay,"

Linus continues.

"We'll circle back to that later because it's something we're going to need to get into in more depth."

Wow. Linus actually does have an agenda. I don't know whether to be impressed or low-key terrified.

"Next item is something awkward and embarrassing. For me. But there's something I need to tell you, Ryde."

"O-kay."

Ryde takes a long pull of his beer, like he might need it for whatever Linus is about to say.

Turns out, he does.

Linus proceeds to fill us in on the crush he had on Oakey way back in the old days. He was right. It is awkward and embarrassing, and his face reflects that with a pink hue filling his cheeks above his stubble and the muscle in his jaw pulsing visibly.

"I wasn't going to tell you, but after hiding shit from your dad this past week and hating how that felt, this is how I want to operate from now on. No more secrets. Everything out in the open."

He tries to stifle a groan.

"No matter how mortifying."

That brings a small smile to Ryde's lips.

"Have to admit, it is slightly cringe, you crushing on my dad, but thank you for telling me. I think?"

Linus lifts an eyebrow, and it almost looks like he's silently trying to get something else out of Ryde. A moment later, Ryde turns to me.

"Looks like it's my turn."

His turn for what?

"What's going on?" I ask.

Ryde takes another gulp of beer then says, "Dad said something to me before he left."

"Okay."

"About you."

"Oh."

He takes a deep breath.

"He said he thinks you're in love with me."

It's like I've been kicked in the chest by a pissed-off mama kangaroo.

"H-h-he said what?"

Ryde's eyes plead with me to not have to repeat himself, and I give a small nod, dragging my fingers through my hair as I try to catch my breath. Thinking's a little hard right now that my world has been tilted off its axis.

This is the biggest secret—really, the only secret—I've ever kept from my best friend, and now, somehow, his father of all people has laid it out bare in the open.

Ryde's eyes are scanning my face, trying to read my reaction, while Linus's expression is soft and neutral. Almost like he knows. I release a long breath, and as unexpected as this bombshell is, I feel safe with these two. So I guess the only thing for me to do is be honest.

"Your dad's right,"

I say, finding my voice even though my throat is still tight, and I'm still on guard.

"I do have feelings for you. Very strong feelings."

"Love feelings?"

Linus gently prods, and I bob my head.

"Yeah. Love feelings. It's part of the reason why I came out here."

Ryde furrows his brow.

"I thought you came out here to get a killer revenge bod and spend time with me."

"You're right on both counts, but the plan was that by spending time with you, it'd help me get over you."

"Huh? I don't get it."

"You were meant to be a shitty housemate. A slob. Someone who doesn't scrub the toilet after taking a massive dump. Or leaves their clipped toenails on the coffee table. I don't know…"

I run my fingers through my hair again, tugging at the ends.

"I was hoping to fall out of love with you."

"You really do make the worst plans,"

Ryde says with the tiniest hint of a smile.

"No, I make the best plans. I blame you. Both of you."

I shoot Linus a look.

"How can I get over Ryde when we're turning you on so much by making out in front of you? That was never factored into my plan. That's why it's not working."

"Hey, don't blame me."

Linus raises his hands in the air.

"None of this was calculated on my end, either."

"I know that, but…"

I glance down quickly and see his cock is hard and bulging against the material of his workout shorts.

"You have been very…encouraging."

He folds his arms over his stacked chest, oblivious to what I'm seeing.

"Don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh yeah?"

I move over and rub my hand up and down Ryde's thigh, then I curl my other hand around the back of his neck and pull him in for a short, sharp kiss, flicking my tongue as we pull apart. There's no missing Linus's hard-on now, Ryde spotting it without me needing to point it out.

Linus follows our gazes, letting out a raspy chuckle.

"That's not fair,"

he complains.

"Who said anything about fair?"

I run my tongue along the side of Ryde's neck then whisper into his ear, loud enough for Linus to hear.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?"

I see his cheek rising as he smiles.

"Fuck yeah,"

he growls.

And with that, we stand up and descend on Linus.