Page 46 of The Gravity of Us (Elements 4)
“What are you talking about?”
“You. That whole act back there.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he replied.
“Come on, Graham! For once in your life can you not be condescending?”
“Me? Condescending? Are you joking? He made portraits, of himself, naked, and deemed it as artwork when truly it’s just some kind of hipster bullshit that doesn’t belong in this museum.”
“He’s talented.”
“Your idea of talent is jaded.”
“I know,” I replied harshly. “I do, after all, read your books.”
“Oh, good one, Lucille. You really told me,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Yet unlike your so-called boyfriend, I know my flaws when it comes to my craftsmanship. He believes he’s the best of the best.”
“What do you mean? What do you mean ‘so-called’ boyfriend?”
“He doesn’t know you,” he said assertively, making me raise an eyebrow.
“We’ve been together for more than five years, Graham.”
“And yet he still hasn’t a clue who you are, which isn’t shocking, because he seems to have his head so far up his own ass he has no time to focus on anyone else.”
“Wow,” I said, completely baffled by his words. “You don’t know him.”
“I know his type, the type of people who get the smallest taste of success and feel as if they can toss away the things and people from their past. I don’t know how he used to look at you, but he stares at you as if you’re nothing now. As if you’re below him. I give your relationship two weeks. I bet it’s over in a month, tops.”
“You’re being a jerk.”
“I’m telling you the truth. He’s a self-righteous piece of shit. Do you know what the nickname for Richard is? It’s Dick, which is so fitting. I mean really, Lucille, you sure know how to pick ’em.”
He was fuming, his face bright red as he fiddled with his cuffs nonstop. I’d never seen him so mad, so far from his normal unemotional self.
“Why are you so angry? What’s wrong with you?”
“Never mind, forget it. Hand Talon over.”
“No, you don’t get to do that. You don’t get to explode and be disrespectful to my boyfriend and then tell me to forget it.”
“I can, and I did.”
“No. Graham, stop it. For once in your life, just say what you are actually feeling!”
He parted his lips, but no words escaped him.
“Really? Not a word?” I asked.
“Not a word,” he softly replied.
“Then I think you’re right. I think it’s time for you to go.”
“I agree.” He stood inches away from me, his hot breaths melting against my skin. My heart pounded against my ribcage as I wondered what he was doing, and he took a few seconds before moving in closer. He straightened his tie, lowered his voice, and spoke so sternly. “Just because you smile and act free doesn’t mean the cage doesn’t exist. It merely means you lowered your standards for how far you’ll allow yourself to fly.”
Tears burned at the backs of my eyes as he took Talon from my grip and turned to leave. Right before he stepped out of the darkened area, he paused and took a few deep breaths. He turned back my way, locking eyes with mine, and his lips parted slightly as if he were going to speak again, but I held my hand up. “Please, just go,” I whispered, my voice shaky. “I don’t think I can take any more tonight, Mr. Russell.”
The coldness of me using his last name made him stand up straighter, and when he disappeared, my tears began to fall. My fingers wrapped around my necklace, and I took in a few deep breaths. “Air above me, earth below me, fire within me, water surround me…” I repeated the words until my heartbeats returned to a normal pace. I repeated the words until my mind stopped spinning. I repeated the words until I erased the shock Graham had caused to my soul. Then, I headed back to the gala with a fake smile on my lips, and in my head, I repeated my words some more.
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