Page 20

J eremy

--------

T he Utes were a raucous team that hadn t been a real threat in years, which provided a rare and golden opportunity for the Trojans third line. That lineup was predominantly sophomores who d been benched all last year, with a few upperclassmen mixed in to provide support as needed. Jeremy was excited to see what they could do-or he had been, until the Ravens horrific violence ruined his mood.

Normally Nabil would be promoted to starting lineup for such a match, but with Ramadan underway he would be fasting until October. He could still practice and play, but he felt more comfortable and effective as backup. Ananya would start, and Nabil would come in for Timothy as needed in second half. Jeremy was off the lineup entirely, as was Jean. Jeremy wasn t sure if it was a blessing or a curse: he wasn t sure he could give a game his full attention, but he had nothing solid to distract him from the Foxes.

On the Trojans third lap, the Utes captain Micky Telsey and vice-captain Bruno Winslow were waiting at the Home bench. Jeremy assumed the Utes assistants flagged them down, so he and Xavier peeled off to pay their respects.

Telsey skipped a greeting to say, You saw the Ravens match?

Yeah, Jeremy said, trading easy handshakes with the two. Hoping we get some updates before the match starts.

It doesn t make sense, Telsey said. People were rooting for them, you know? Don t get me wrong, it was super satisfying to watch them get humbled last spring, but their crash and burn this summer s been kind of scary. I really thought they were going to get it together before the season started.

How could they? Winslow asked. People have been making a spectacle of their tragedies this summer. This whole thing is on the Foxes, he added. When Xavier frowned at him, he insisted, You saw their interviews same as I did, I bet. They were looking for a fight; they can t cry the victim when one found them.

Talk shit, get hit, Telsey agreed.

The Foxes antagonism is understandable, Xavier said. The Ravens started this fight when Kevin transferred. Their fans did, anyway, and Edgar Allan only once called them to order. Arson? he asked when the Utes looked unimpressed. He counted it off on his fingers. Defacing Palmetto s campus and stadium? Police raids? Remind me how many cars got destroyed at the athletes dorm last spring.

Telsey waved him off. The Ravens aren t liable for what their fans do. Put the blame on the Ravens administration and their crazy followers, not on them. It s not their fault their talent and popularity put them front and center of all this madness. I don t blame you when USC and UCLA tear each other s campuses up over your football rivalries, do I?

That accusation was leveled at Jeremy, who weighed his options as carefully as he could. Being a victim doesn t automatically absolve someone of their wrongdoings, he said at last. I can regret what they re going through now, but I am not required to forgive them for what they ve done to people I care about. I genuinely hope they get the help they need, and I hope it happens as far from the court as possible. Josten was right: none of them are ready to be back yet. It isn t fair to them or anyone they re up against.

That s bold, Telsey said, and added an unkind, and self-serving, since they ve always stood between you and the crown. It s in your best interests if they re taken out of the running.

All due respect, we ve always been less concerned with who we play than how we play, Jeremy said. Telsey didn t look convinced, but it was such a secondary argument Jeremy saw no need to push it. Instead he asked, Split the court for drills? The Utes only numbered eighteen, which meant it d be crowded but doable to have both teams out at once. If someone can come by and unlock the door on our side, we ll take the Away court.

Winslow motioned to Jeremy. True story Reacher tried to kill Moreau last week? I saw the pictures. He mimed choking himself one-handed and searched Jeremy s expression for the truth. Long way to go to kill a guy who s supposedly so innocent, don t you think?

Thank you for your concern, Jeremy said.

When it was obvious they were getting nothing else, Telsey sighed and gestured. Yeah, we ll have someone get the door for you. See you for the coin toss.

Xavier waited until they were half the court away from the Utes before saying, I think I hate him.

It was unexpected enough Jeremy almost tripped over his own feet. Telsey?

Coach Moriyama, Xavier said. The hard tug at the corner of his mouth said he was fighting a scowl. The stadium was empty this far out from serve, but after three years with the Trojans Xavier was used to schooling his expression in public. He shouldn t have up and disappeared like that. The intrigue behind that abrupt exit makes it impossible for anyone to let him go and move on. The Ravens are still his darling proteges, the wounded ideal everyone should aspire to. No one can think critically about them; everyone s keeping a light on for a man who s not coming home.

But speaking of the Ravens. Xavier caught hold of Jeremy s arm and dragged him to a stop. Who the hell is the master , Jeremy? Someone with rank, someone with the final say on who could or couldn t captain that team, I know, but tell me I m not connecting the dots right. Xavier searched Jeremy s face for answers, but Jeremy s grim expression did nothing to reassure him. Xavier let go of him like he d been burned. You aren t serious.

The more I learn about Edgar Allan, the more creeped out I get, Jeremy admitted.

You think? Xavier rubbed away a sudden chill and stared up at the stands. He tended his angry thoughts in silence for a minute, then jabbed a finger into Jeremy s chest and said, Jean s got no real filter when he s pressed. Make him say that on TV. It ll get a conversation going, I guarantee it.

No, Jeremy said, and insisted, No, when Xavier only frowned at him. Jeremy grasped for something to say to deter him, but the best he could offer was the truth: Xavier, he s scared of Edgar Allan. It wiped that annoyed look off Xavier s face immediately, and Jeremy pressed his advantage with, He doesn t want to challenge them. I don t have to like it, and I won t stop encouraging him to stand his ground, but I m not going to force him into a confrontation he s not ready to have. He s learning how to trust us. I can t betray him.

Xavier grimaced but didn t argue, and they set off toward the Away benches once more. They were nearly to the locker room when Xavier said, If Coach Moriyama was up to some shady nonsense there, Edgar Allan was covering for him. Walker practically said it, didn t she? He frowned as he thought, then said, Palmetto State promised President Andritch discretion.

Clever, wasn t it? Jeremy asked. She confirmed Jean s injuries were worse than reported and that Edgar Allan s board knew about it without outright accusing anyone of anything.

The Foxes are sharper than they let on, Xavier agreed. Mention of the Foxes had them picking up the pace. Xavier got the door for them and said, Maybe Coach will have heard something by now?

But Rhemann shook his head as soon as Jeremy made eye contact, so Jeremy had no choice but to put the team from mind. His Trojans needed him present and focused. If he couldn t be an anchor for them, what good was he? He put everything he had into warmups and drills, and Xavier and Cody were quick to follow his lead. The three did their level best to keep the Trojans occupied and distracted until first serve. Only when the crowd was chanting a final countdown did Jeremy let his attention fracture again, and he looked for Rhemann.

Rhemann had spent most of the last hour on his phone, fielding calls and texts from colleagues who d seen the Ravens ambush and wanted to hash it out. Surely somewhere in there was a real update from Palmetto State. Jeremy glanced toward Jean, who was sitting blank-faced and silent on the Away bench like he didn t know a game was happening in front of him. He dug around for something reassuring to say and came back emptyhanded; Jean wasn t the type to take comfort in hollow promises.

A worthy distraction came when Rhemann made his first set of subs: Lucas, Min, and Ananya went in for Ashton, Sebastian, and Jesus. Jeremy went to them as they filed off the court. They looked tired and stressed, uncertain how to feel about their performance, but Jeremy was happy to praise the parts they d done well. Most of the rest would sort itself out, as their weakest spots were due to inexperience and age. He was proud of them, and watching their giddiness return in the wake of his easy compliments and encouragement helped chase the lingering grief from his thoughts.

Thirty minutes into first half, Rhemann got a call serious enough he collected his coaches to his side afterward. The four stepped out of earshot of the bench to talk. From here Jeremy could only see Lisinski s face, and the look that crossed it pulled his stomach into a tight knot. Jimenez s hands moved in emphatic, angry gestures as he made his opinion known. Rhemann shook his head through most of it, but even from here Jeremy could see the tense set to his shoulders. Finally he dismissed his colleagues, but White and Lisinski moved together toward the court wall. Jimenez remained, but his heavy stare settled on the back of Jean s head.

Rhemann called for him, and Jean went to them immediately. Whatever Rhemann said to him, it landed like a physical blow: Jean lurched back from him, one gloved hand locked on the front of his own jersey. Rhemann tipped his head toward Jimenez, who motioned for Jean to follow, and the two men started for the locker room. Rhemann watched them go, expression serious, and noticed Jeremy watching him only after they d disappeared. He finally joined his team at the benches, but all he had to say was,

We don t have news from Palmetto State yet, Rhemann said. Let s focus up.

It was and wasn t reassuring; if it wasn t the Foxes injuries that drove Jean from sight, this development had to do with the Ravens. That was worrisome, but not as personal, so Jeremy forced his attention back to the game. At last the buzzer sounded to release both teams to the locker room. White and Lisinski ran interference for the reporters who approached for a halftime interview, urging them to keep their distance from the team. That was unusual enough that Jeremy picked up the pace, and he managed to pass half a dozen teammates in his hurry to reach the locker room.

Jean was nowhere to be seen, but Rhemann s lingering look warned Jeremy not to hunt him down. Tony and Bobby were quick to pass out drinks while the Trojans stretched. Rhemann waited until they d stepped aside before moving toward the center of the room.

We have a lot we need to cover, and only so much time, he said, checking his watch. This is not where I would prefer to start, but I don t want it to be the last thing you hear before we return to the court for second half.

He swept the room with a look as his Trojans went still to hear him better. The ERC reviewed the match between Palmetto State and Edgar Allan. After speaking to all involved parties, they ve made a ruling: Coach Rossi is stepping down effective immediately, and the Ravens have been suspended for the remainder of the season.

The silence that followed was deafening, and then Jeremy managed a startled, What?

Rhemann held his stare and said again, They re disqualified.

The locker room erupted in pandemonium. Suddenly everyone was shouting, but Jeremy couldn t understand anything anyone was saying. He could only stare at Rhemann in disbelief until Laila caught hold of him. She shook him until he looked at her, and the chaos came into too-sharp focus. Across the room Derek pumped his fists in triumph and yelled, No Ravens in finals! Let s fucking go!

The younger Trojans teetered between nervous excitement and alarm, but the upperclassmen had a hungry look in their eyes. They d spent four and five years coming up short at the finish line, but how could they possibly lose now? While Jeremy would ve preferred to defeat Edgar Allan fair and square, he d take victory in any form. He wanted to win so badly he felt ill.

Cat plastered herself against his side. It s down to us and Penn State. Maybe the- Here she faltered as reality set in, and she motioned to Rhemann. Any news from the Foxes?

No official statements have been made, he said, and that was sobering enough to quiet his team down at last.

It wasn t an outright no. Jeremy wondered if that meant he d heard something from Wymack off the record. He honestly wasn t sure how often the two coaches spoke, since the Foxes and Trojans had only crossed paths the first time last year. He knew Rhemann had great respect for Wymack and the way he d crafted his unorthodox team, and Rhemann had never hesitated to throw his weight behind Palmetto State when the ERC seemed poised to strike the small team down, but they had an entire continent between them. It was still possible, he supposed; such setbacks hadn t stopped him and Kevin from forming an unlikely friendship.

All right, Rhemann said. Now that we re all on the same page, let s trust Coach Wymack to handle his team and the ERC to do what they can for Edgar Allan. We ve still got half of a match left to get through, so let s get our heads back in the game.

They had about twelve minutes left of break, enough time to acknowledge the solid efforts of the starting lineup and prep the second-half crew with tips and insights. Jean slipped into the room with only a few minutes left and immediately took up a spot at Jeremy s side. There was still more tension in him than Jeremy wanted to see, but Jeremy couldn t blame him for being uptight. Jeremy wanted to ask how he was holding up and if he d spoken to Renee or Neil, but he didn t want to distract his teammates this close to serve.

He managed to bite his tongue until the half was underway, and then he asked, Have you heard from the Foxes?

I called Renee, Jean admitted. His eyes tracked the ball as it was thrown this way and that, but Jeremy could tell in a glance he wasn t paying attention to the match. Jean s thoughts were with Renee still and whatever news she d had to share. Jeremy wondered if Jean would make him ask, but then Jean dug his fingers into his side as hard as he could. Jeremy knew what he was going to say before Jean said it: Jasmine fractured two of Neil s ribs. The angle of her blow and his padding saved the rest.

It was what he d feared, and Jeremy couldn t stop a quiet, Jesus. That took Neil off the lineup for the rest of fall semester; he d be lucky if he made it back in time for the last one or two matches before winter break. It was a minor blessing that the Foxes had recruited more strikers, but they were both unseasoned freshmen. If either was half as clever or talented as Neil, the Foxes still had a fighting chance, but it was a miserable way to start the season.

Better than a fatal overdose, Jeremy thought, and asked, Kevin?

Bruised and angry, Jean said.

There were still too many shadows on his face. Jeremy mentally went down the lineup and asked, Andrew?

Jean s hand slid up to his shoulder, finding the spot where Williams racquet made contact. Fractured clavicle. Winfield hasn t determined yet if it needs surgery; she is seeking a second opinion. Jean s mouth pulled tight in displeasure. Renee will tell me as soon as a decision is made.

That Jean seemed equally invested in Andrew s recovery as he was Neil s was unexpected, but Jeremy couldn t be heartened by it right now. He couldn t think of any teammates over the years who d broken their collarbones, but he imagined it would sideline Andrew for at least a few months. Renee was reliable enough, and they had a freshman to fall back on if she needed relief, but the Ravens had put the Foxes on a hard back foot. Jeremy wasn t sure they could pull off two miracle years in a row.

He s lucky, Jeremy said, turning an unseeing gaze toward the court. It looked like Williams was aiming for his head.

He was, Jean said without hesitation. Ravens understand that missteps and mistakes must be punished. Andrew broke Riko s arm at finals, setting in motion the events that led to his death. Brayden and Cameron wanted to even the scales. He tipped his hand this way and that before leveling it out. A life for a life.

Cam s an asshole, Cody said, moving up on Jean s other side.

Yes, Jean agreed.

Say the word and I ll fight him over Christmas break, Cody said. I wasn t going to go home for it, but I ll make an exception.

Jean waved that off. I hate him more than he hates me. At the look Cody sent him, Jean shrugged and said, He was irrationally rude to Thea at every opportunity.

What d he have against Muldani? Jeremy asked.

She s black, Cody said. When Jean muttered a correction, they gestured and said, Yeah, but you can t see any of her father in her. Cody counted years on their fingers and said, Oh, I guess you would ve overlapped with her for a year. Have we finally discovered a Raven you got along with?

Kevin, Jean said.

I m hoping there were more than two, Jeremy admitted.

Finn, Jean said, as the buzzer sounded on a Trojan goal. Jeremy thumped on the wall in approval and encouragement, but his focus was on Jean as he added, Sergio, most of the time. Brayden. Colleen. Zane.

The last was so quiet Jeremy almost missed it. At the sharp look Jeremy sent him, Jean dug his hand into his own chest. For a moment the grief on his face was endless, but Jean schooled it a heartbeat later. That Jean could scrounge up so much emotion for a man who d practically left fingerprints on his throat was unbearable. How Jean s kind heart had survived a place like Evermore, Jeremy wasn t sure. It was bruised and bleeding, but it wasn t broken. Jeremy wasn t sure if that ache in his chest was pride or grief. Whatever it was, it was hard to breathe around.

Perhaps Cody felt the same, because they seemed content to let the conversation die there. The three turned their attention back to the match at last, though only Cody and Jeremy reacted to the Trojans solid plays and scoring attempts.

The relief Jeremy felt at the final bell was intense enough to be shameful; he d followed the game on a surface level when his team deserved his undivided attention. He d have to rewatch this match over the weekend so he could give proper feedback next week. For now it was enough that they d won seven to six, and he let himself be buoyed by his teammates excitement as they washed up and changed out for the ride home.

As soon as he was on the bus, he fired off a string of text messages to Kevin. At his side Jean messaged Renee again, but they put Provo behind them without an update. A few miles later Laila s phone started ringing. She rummaged through every pocket on her backpack twice before Cat pushed her headphones up and said, Back pocket, babe. By then Laila had missed the call, but as she leaned into Cat to dig her phone free, it started up again.

I m here, she said in greeting. No, we re on our way back from Salt Lake City. I m not sure, we just left campus maybe an hour ago. What s all that noise? She briefly tipped her phone away from her ear with a wince and asked, Can t you move somewhere quieter? It s so loud. Yes, yes, I m looking, she said, leaning past Cat to stare out the window. Give me a moment, I don t see any signs.

Jeremy reached across the aisle to nudge her and said, Just south of Provo.

Jeremy says we ve passed Provo, Laila said, with a quick nod to him. I didn t look at the route, but yes, I assume we re on I-15. Wait, I can barely hear you, she said, pressing one hand flat over her ear. At her side Cat peeled her headphones off entirely to stare at her, worried. Laila hunched forward in her seat like that could somehow help her hear better. Tell me what s going on. Why does it matter where I am?

She was quiet for about thirty seconds, and then she silenced the entire bus with a shrill, What do you mean, it s on fire ? No! What do you mean? But- She went quiet and still to listen. With the rest of the Trojans deadly silent, Jeremy finally heard the tinny and distant sound of sirens. Jeremy glanced up as Rhemann appeared in the aisle just in front of their seats, expression grave, but he was quick to return his full attention to Laila. How bad is it? No, tell me now. I want- She cut herself off again to listen.

She was quiet so long Jeremy feared she d gone into shock, but at last she offered a hoarse, I ll call you back, and hung up.

She sat silent for another twenty seconds, still leaning forward over her knees with her forehead pressed to the seatback in front of her. Jeremy was dimly aware of the floozies hovering in the aisle and Cat s hands resting oh-so-gently on Laila s shoulders; he couldn t look away from Laila s downturned face or the curls that hid her expression to look at any of them.

Laila barely got a hand up in time to smother a sob. Cat grabbed her in a fierce embrace, cradling Laila s head to her shoulder. Babe, she tried. Laila, what s going on?

Laila didn t answer, but Jeremy didn t expect her to. Laila hated losing control with an audience, preferring to lick her wounds in private. Jeremy had known her for three years before she finally trusted him with her hurts; showing Cat her vulnerability was still an ongoing struggle despite how much Laila loved her. He didn t know if Cat could reach her now, so he had to try.

Jeremy crouched in the aisle so he could reach her easier. She had a death grip on her phone still, so he caught hold of her knee and gave it a careful squeeze. Hey, he said, keeping his tone as even as he could. Laila, tell me what happened.

Her hand was trembling when she let go of her face. She caught hold of Cat s arm in a white-knuckled grip but turned her too-wet gaze on Jeremy. He watched her jaw work, watched her swallow her grief and horror with obvious effort. Her voice was still a touch too frail when she said, They ve burned the house down. Our house.

He heard the words, but he couldn t digest them. All he could do was stare blankly at her and wait for something that made sense. Laila s expression fractured, but she maintained desperate control as she looked up at Rhemann. Coach, please leave me in Cedar City. My uncle says there s a regional airport there. He ll send his jet to collect me if you re willing, and he ll fax your office any paperwork you need to relinquish me from your care.

Wait one, Rhemann said, and went up front to confer with the drivers.

Cat finally found her voice. Burned it down, she echoed, in a tone Jeremy had never heard from her before. You aren t serious. The house? What do you mean they burned the house down? Babe. Laila.

Laila briefly pressed her knuckles to her chin, fighting for a calm she could barely find. Security has footage of three men throwing something through the living room window seconds before the alarms went off. I don t- Laila sucked in a slow breath and tried again. The firefighters are still working, so Gary can t go in, but he says it s going to be a total loss. It s been burning too long.

Rhemann returned to say, We can detour at Cedar City, but we re still about three hours out. I m not sure how many seats you ll have available, but I assume all of you will be getting off. He glanced at Cat, then looked over Jeremy s head at Jean. Do you need or want one of us to go with you? He gestured toward himself to indicate the coaches.

Gary will pick us up at the airport in LA, Laila said as she called her uncle back. We don t need you.

It was a rude way to refuse, but considering the circumstances Rhemann didn t take offense at her poor wording. He waited in silence while Laila hashed out the details. Flight time to Cedar City was about as long as the drive south from their current location, so Laila could get off the bus and onto the plane almost immediately. It would get her to Los Angeles at least three hours ahead of the Trojans: way too late to save her home, but significantly better than sitting helpless on a bus with so many witnesses to fret over her. Her uncle s jet could fit six, and the glance Laila flicked Jeremy said she expected him on it with her.

Thank you, Coach, Laila said when she hung up at last.

Let me know if we can help, Rhemann said, and retreated to give her space.

Cat was still staring at Laila like she didn t know her, and her quiet, All of it? broke Jeremy s heart. It s all gone?

Laila dragged Cat into a short, fierce hug, then motioned for Jeremy to give her space. I ll get us some answers, one way or another, she said, getting up when Jeremy returned to his seat. She moved toward the front of the bus, phone at her ear. It felt an eternity before her call connected, and Jeremy knew she d called her mother when her strident demands came out in Arabic. Cat stared after the stiff line of her back, looking forlorn, but Cody leaned over the seatback to wrap their arms around Cat s shoulders.

Jeremy turned an anxious look on Jean, guilt stricken over how delayed his sympathy was. I m so sorry, he said. Jean had come to Los Angeles with a single carryon and two shirts to his name. It d taken him months to finally fill in the space Cat and Laila gave him, and he d only recently started adding quiet personal touches to his areas. Jeremy thought of his postcard from Kevin, the wristband from July s fireworks, and the sand dollar he d picked up along the way. It made him ill, and his voice caught on his pained, Jean, I-

The ERC announced it, Jean said, voice dull and stare distant. He clarified a moment later with, Their decision to eliminate the Ravens. I saw the segment during break. Before he rejoined the team, Jeremy guessed, but he wasn t sure where Jean was going with this. Jean didn t make him ask but said, This is my fault.

Don t say that. Jeremy caught Jean s wrist when Jean didn t look at him and insisted, You had nothing to do with this.

Feigning ignorance serves no one, Jean said, with a sharp bite to his words. When the Ravens are insulted, their devotees lash out on their behalf. You saw it last year with Neil and the Foxes, and the year before when Kevin left. Do not pretend you do not know what is happening here. The Ravens have been ruined, and someone must take the blame. I will always- Jean couldn t finish it. His teeth clicked as he clenched his jaw tight.

Xavier had listed examples of Raven riots for Telsey just a few hours ago. Arson on campus , he d said, and Jeremy was cold all over. He wouldn t deny that Laila s house was deliberately targeted, but he refused to let Jean suffocate under that weight. He tightened his grip and said, Look at me. Look at me, Jean, because I need to know you re listening. He waited until Jean met his gaze before saying, If this was retaliatory, that s still on the people who chose to cross the line. It is not your fault. It never will be.

You don t believe that.

Maybe they did it to hurt you, Jeremy allowed, but that doesn t mean you re responsible. You had nothing to do with the ERC s ruling. You re a victim as much as Cat and Laila are, so don t take on a burden that isn t yours. It won t help any of you. Do you understand?

Sometimes Jeremy is smarter than he looks, Xavier said where he was leaning against their seatback. Listen to him, Jean, and don t go down that road.

It s an unhelpful spiral, Min added. They adore you and so will gladly reassure you of your innocence until you believe them, but your unasked-for guilt is a distraction from their loss and grief. They don t deserve that extra stress right now.

Xavier nodded. The best thing you can do right now is accept that some people are assholes and that it is outside of your control. Mourn what you ve lost without carrying more than you should.

Framing it as a shared burden on Cat and Laila was probably the most effective part of their argument. A frown tugged at the corner of Jean s mouth as he thought it through, but it never fully formed, and at last Jean glanced past Jeremy at Cat. Cody had moved into Laila s open seat, but Cat was on her phone now as she spoke in an agitated blend of Spanish and English. Laila had gone quiet a few rows up, but she was sending out quick texts as she paced back and forth in the aisle. The back of the bus was still eerily quiet. No one knew what to say, and they all knew better than to crowd Laila s space when she was in a mood.

Jeremy did a quick mental tally of what few things of his might have gotten lost. His backpack was in his car at the stadium, so he at least didn t have to replace his textbooks for the semester. His LSAT books were a happy loss, and he d only had a dozen-odd outfits tucked away in Jean s closet.

He was going room by room when Jean said, I am sorry about your dog.

A bit of cardboard was a silly thing to grieve when these three had lost everything, but the reminder put a sharp twist in his chest. Barkbark was one of Cat s first gifts to him, an attempt to get closer when she realized his and Laila s friendship was a package deal. Jeremy knew he wasn t a real dog, but... Jeremy rubbed at the ache and said, Are you? I thought you hated him. He meant it to come out a lighthearted tease, but it fell a little flat. The sideways look Jean sent him said he heard it.

You didn t, Jean said, like that was all that mattered.

Laila finally returned. Cody dragged Laila into a short, fierce hug before stepping out of her way. Jeremy wasn t surprised Laila didn t return it, and the look on Cody s face said they knew better than to take it personally. They moved wordlessly back to their own row, and Laila settled beside Cat once more. Cat hurriedly ended her call and turned in her seat to face Laila. The headlights splashing through the window had her damp cheeks glistening, but her voice was remarkably steady when she said, Anything?

Get some sleep if you can, Laila said, gently pulling Cat toward her and offering herself as a pillow. It s going to be a very long night.

Jeremy would be surprised if anyone up front managed to rest. The hours to Cedar City were as miserable as they were endless, but finally the driver took the last turn for the airport. Laila tugged at Jeremy s sleeve in a silent demand for him to come along as she carried her bag to the front of the bus. Cat was close behind her, so Jeremy urged Jean ahead of him before following. They were quick to disembark, but he hung back for a moment to face his coaches.

Thank you, he said. I ll let you know when we re on board and when we ve touched down in LA.

Be careful, Rhemann said. Take care of each other.

The bus pulled away as soon as Jeremy was clear of it, and Jeremy jogged to meet his friends at the door. Twenty minutes later they were taxiing down the runway in plush seats that faced each other. Laila waited until they d reached altitude before pulling a notebook from her bag. She flipped to the back where she knew she d find enough blank pages to work with, and she stared down at it with a morose look on her face.

Gary said we ll need a list for our insurance claim, she said.

They only got halfway through the living room s contents before Cat finally started crying in earnest, and Laila pushed everything aside in favor of holding onto her. Jeremy quietly tried to take over, but the more he wrote the heavier his heart grew. It felt impossible that that homey space was gone, with its mismatched lamps and tables, the handstitched quilts from Cat s grandmother, and the games they d laughed around so many nights.

Jeremy finally had to turn the notebook over so he couldn t see the list, and he stared out the window in silence for the remainder of the flight.