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CHAPTER XXVI

With both Daniel and Norton in on the secret – and Booker, too, having formed some idea – Mary felt horribly guilty that Cassy was still in the dark.

Of course, Mary could hardly tell her. Supposing, just supposing, it was all in her mind? For even as the weeks went on, and their ritual continued, still she must question it. After all, Ned did like to ride and was famously fond of the country about Hatch. He craved company in general, and she was always available while others were busy … But then, she would catch him studying her at dinner while her father opined, and see the warmth of his eyes in the candlelight …

It was to Mary’s benefit, if not her dear friend’s, that Cassy was often preoccupied. Since the moment of the Lord George disaster, Fanny had at once cast the poor girl into the role of useful spinster and set her to work, so that when Mary did visit Godmersham, she would most likely find Cassy sorting the china cupboard or up to her elbows in linen or away altogether, helping out in the Married One’s nursery. Come Christmas, however, the Knights and the Knatchbulls were often combined. And it was then that Cassy started to guess that something was afoot.

On 29 December, as they were dressing together for the Ashford Ball, she mused into the glass, as if they had been mid-conversation: ‘My point is, Mary, though you have long been pretty enough to be almost annoying , I have found it in my heart to forgive you, for I am essentially kind . But I must say – thank you, Lane’ – Cassy tipped her head to the side to examine the chignon – ‘I suppose I shall do .’ She turned to the bed upon which Mary sat, ready. ‘I must say that, all of a sudden, you are starting to take things to a somewhat unfortunate extreme . Stand up! Let me look at you.’

Mary obeyed, smoothed down the white Chantilly on her skirt, and issued a twirl.

‘Well, quite. Absolutely outrageous. I shall not be standing anywhere near you , that you can count on.’ Cassy rose up to standing, a sweet vision in pink. ‘It is simply not fair .’

‘You are divine, darling.’ Mary gave her a tentative hug – neither girl wanted to disturb her own dress – and Cassy softened at once.

‘Of course, it is love,’ Cassy began, almost casually, as she gathered her fan and squashed a scent bottle into her reticule. ‘That is what everyone says, and one is forced to agree. There is not a lady on earth who can look quite so enchanting without an ardent admirer as the cause of it. It is just nature’s way. No need to speak!’ She flounced a little too dramatically. ‘I know you shan’t tell me. I must discover it myself.’

The ball was a late one – they were out till past three – so the next day, both families laid low in their own houses. It was New Year’s Eve when Mary was brought back to Godmersham. She went at once to find Cassy up in her room. The gentlemen were out shooting and the girls had agreed to start work on their costumes for the Twelfth Night Masquerade. Mary was much looking forward to it and keen to share her ideas.

‘I rather think we should try the Tudor style,’ she began in her excitement, even as she walked through the door. ‘ You in a crimson and – Cass! Is something the matter?’

Cassy stayed in the armchair, hands in her lap, and raised one pretty, dark eyebrow. ‘I know .’

Mary tried to dissemble. ‘Know what, dearest? I can’t think what you mean.’

‘We will have no more of that, thank you. I fear you are rumbled . Do you think I learned nothing from all those romances we used to devour? Excuse me , but I am an expert. I knew what to look for and saw it at once. You danced with George for half of the night!’

‘ George? ’ Mary fell on the bed and burst into laughter. ‘Of course he is a darling but I promise you, Cass’ – she made the sign of the cross – ‘I am not in love with George!’

‘I know that, you fool.’ Cassy laughed then, too, and went over to embrace her. ‘There is nothing between you two, as there is nothing between you and any of the other poor swains who took you on to the floor. There was just one who did not even dare ask. Who kept well away … And that gentleman is—’

A knock came on the door, and Marianne put her head round. ‘Ah, there you are, Mary. I thought I should find you here. I come with a message.’ Her expression was puzzled. ‘Our brother has asked if you might meet him down in the orangery?’

Cassy gave a great whoop of triumph; Mary became flustered.

‘There must be some mistake, Marianne. They are all out on the shoot …’

‘Ned stayed behind,’ Marianne explained, matter-of-fact. ‘Most unlike him to miss it, I completely agree. Yet miss it he has … Shall you go to him or shall I—’

But with a loud cry of ‘Happy New Year, darling!’ Cassy had already pushed her out through the door.

Mary found Ned pacing across the black-and-white chequered floor. Candlelight danced in the mirrors. A fine fire roared in the grate. He turned as she slipped through the long door – that smooth, lovely face contorted with agony. She walked slowly towards him.

‘You came,’ he sighed, and his whole being relaxed.

So somehow he had doubted her? He too had suffered uncertainty? The insight astonished her. So, in this, they were equals!

‘It is time that I spoke. Our – this – friendship between us has become something more to me, and it would be unfair to continue it further without my declaration.

‘Miss Knatchbull – my dear, dearest friend – you have become, quite without any design on my own part, most precious to me. Should you not feel the same, pray believe I shall at once go back into Hampshire and bother you no longer.

‘But first I must say that I love you, most deeply – have loved you, I think, since the spring.’

How long had Mary waited! How much could her heart take? And yet, e’en still, her wretched mind could only be rational: was that not indecently soon after Lady Elizabeth Bligh turned him down?

‘Dare I now ask if you might feel the same?’

Mary wanted to laugh. How could he not know! ‘Oh, yes, sir. I do. I love you completely. And if you would like me, too, to declare for exactly how long, well then.’ She looked up at him, beaming. ‘I do believe I can date it back to that day in the summer but last. When I first laid my poor eyes upon the glories of Chawton.’

‘You beast!’ He grabbed at her wrists then. The first time they had touched since his hand had brushed hers. She shivered. ‘You wretch! I don’t know whether to marry you or box your ears.’

‘On balance, sir,’ she replied prettily, ‘I think I might opt for the former.’

‘Then marry me, I pray you! Put us both out of this misery!’

And there, it was done. Mary had defied the rules of all romantic novels! She had found the love of her life, her heart was intact and no obstacles stood in her path! The future lay out before them, bright as a midsummer day. They both laughed in their joy. His hands moved to her waist; sweet lips then found hers. A great heat – a wildfire – shot through to her core. Fireworks exploded through her mind and her soul.

And though now she should be somewhere far, far beyond any form of rational thought, still the words came to her:

So this was it. This was electricity!