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“We cannot go to the constables,” he muttered. “We have no proof that we are under threat.”

“Spencer, let us just return to the party,” she urged, but he refused to move.

When she made to step back toward the house, the pain lanced through her side. She inhaled sharply, and the sound finally drew Spencer’s attention.

“Come on,” he said, turning back to her. “Let’s give our excuses. I do not want to stay here any longer.”

Eleanor frowned at how his voice had changed. He sounded so… distant.

He is just concerned . He takes things too deeply to heart and will think he has endangered us by attending tonight.

But the formal tone was one she had not heard him use in so long, not since the early days of their marriage, and it sent a skitter of worry through her.

She nodded anyway, letting him guide her back to the house, where they discreetly collected Charlotte and Lady Montagu.

Back at Everdawn House, Spencer led her into the drawing room, eased her onto the settee, and then set about gathering supplies. The jagged edge of the broken balustrade had left an open cut, but she would be fine.

As he cleaned her wound, Spencer was quiet and focused, fixing the dressings with methodical care.

“You know, this brings me back,” she said lightly, wanting to reconnect with him, wanting to break the strained silence between them, brought on by fear and worry. “Not only to our first kiss but the night at the inn. You tended my wounds back then, too.”

“I washed you,” he corrected quietly, not meeting her gaze. “I should not have been so brazen.”

“But you were,” she insisted.

“I must have scandalized you.”

Eleanor moved back, out of reach, as he made to wipe her wound again. “Whatever do you mean? Why would you say that?”

“It is true,” he said. “You were an unwed lady, alone, all but kidnapped by a man who had you half-naked within hours, sleeping in the same bed. You accused me of such indecent acts yourself.”

“Yes, when I was hysterical.” She laughed.

But Spencer was not laughing. He stared down at her hands, then at his own, which were curled into fists.

“Spencer, where is this coming from?”

“Nowhere,” he answered shortly. “Let me finish this.”

“No, speak to me,” she insisted. She reached for his face, only for him to pull back, muttering about needing more gauze. “There is a roll right here.”

“Alcohol, then,” he said. “To clean it.”

“You have cleaned it several times,” she pointed out. “Why are you not speaking to me? Did I tease too much in the garden? Did I offend?—”

“We should not be careless like that again.” His blunt statement was unexpected and confusing.

Eleanor shifted back into the settee. “Spencer?” A nervous, uncertain laugh bubbled out of her. “I—Was it not you who said that the public nature of it made it all the more enticing?”

His eyes were still lowered. “Yes, and I was foolish for saying such a thing. We were careless, Eleanor.”

“Oh, Spencer,” she sighed, smiling, trying to cup his face again to draw his eyes to hers, but he jerked away. “It is all right now. Do not fret. I am well, the balustrade will be fixed, and we will continue investigating the footman you saw like we have been doing. He is merely another?—”

“He is Belgrave’s footman, I am certain,” Spencer snarled.

“ We will not be continuing anything. I should have protected you, Eleanor. I should not have let you go tonight. It was dangerous and a risk I should not have taken. I had a lapse of judgment for the sake of passion that could have waited, and I—you were hurt under my watch. My protection.”

“Yes, but I am fine ,” Eleanor emphasized. “I am laughing with you, I can move. Stop torturing yourself, Spencer.”

She knew how his mind must have been turning, how much pressure he put on himself to save others, but he only shook his head violently.

“The severity does not matter,” he snapped, surging to his feet. “The fact is that you were hurt when I should have prevented it.”

“Spencer—”

“I will not rest until Belgrave and Follet are behind bars,” he growled, pacing back and forth.

“I will not rest until my sister can leave the house without fearing for her safety, or without me having to worry about Follet lurking. I will not rest until you can rest, knowing that he will never come near you again.”

“Is this like back at the ball when he approached me? You were angry, bu-but all was well.”

“No, Eleanor.” He rubbed a hand over his face, exhausted and angry at once. “No, this is simply me being careless and putting you in harm’s way. What if that footman had a gun? What if he approached you and injured you further? What if?—”

“ Spencer .”

But he was not listening, still pacing, still rambling, until he suddenly stopped and turned to her. “My passion blindsided me tonight, and I will never let it happen again. I have investigated less, too enamored with you.”

Eleanor reared back, for it sounded like an accusation.

“Our marriage must go back to how it initially was—an arrangement of convenience. Me focused on protecting you, and you enjoying the life of a duchess.”

“I am enjoying the life of a duchess,” she insisted, her voice sharper.

“One outside of my bed.”

The flat-out dismissal was enough to strike a chord within her.

She stood up and immediately clutched her injured side. Spencer’s eyes went right there, guilt flashing across his face.

“This is nothing,” she told him. “This is—Spencer, I could have injured myself like this on a chair or the edge of a table. Anything in this house could have done it.”

“It has to do with my distracted state,” he snapped at her again. “I cannot see you get hurt again.”

“That is inevitable, you fool!” Eleanor shouted right back, not meaning to call him such a thing, but upset and angry nonetheless. “I am allowed to be injured without it meaning the end of—the end of us .”

“No.” His voice dropped to a hushed murmur as he shook his head again. “No, I do not think that will work. I am too distracted when I must remain focused. As long as they walk free, I can’t be distracted.”

“So you will abandon me?”

“It is protection, not abandonment.”

“You are throwing me away like a dirty rag.”

Spencer’s anger wavered for a moment. He could barely look at her, but when he did, it was as though she was a stranger.

He looked defeated, and she wondered if he was angrier at himself for not protecting her or for thinking and saying those words.

“After everything we have gone through,” she pressed. “After everything we have opened up about, you now decide to turn me away.”

“It is not turning you away; it is keeping you safe.”

“I am safest with you,” she insisted.

But he shook his head, undeterred. “I will do as I always promised. I will keep you safe.”

“So that is it?” Eleanor challenged. “This is the end of us?”

“There was never supposed to be an us. We will simply return to how it was. I saved you and made you my wife. I never should have made you my lover, too. Not when the cost was you getting hurt and me getting too distracted from my investigation.”

“ Our investigation,” she corrected, flinching at his cold words.

“Never should have made you my lover … ”

“ My investigation,” Spencer countered.

“So that is it,” Eleanor whispered furiously.

“Will you send me away like you did with Charlotte, then? Will you assign a guard to report on my safety? Will we live separately for the rest of our lives? Follet and Belgrave are good at hiding, Spencer! You intend to pretend that this cannot go on forever?”

“I was careless,” he repeated. “I will not be again. I will not send you away. You will remain where I can keep an eye on you myself.”

“And that is all I am now.” Hurt tinged her voice.

“A thing to be watched. A duchess in another empty home like before.” She shook her head.

“Let me tell you something, Spencer. You were making my life worthy again. You were making this a true home. For once, my memories and thoughts did not echo back at me due to my empty surroundings because you fill my life with so much joy. You will really take that away?”

A mask slid onto his face, so cold that she couldn’t bear to look at it. “I have made my decision.”

She could not even think of a response, let alone voice one, not when an incredulous gasp came from the hallway.

“One of you will start explaining— now ,” Charlotte demanded.