Page 4

Aria

I nearly threw my cell phone across the living room in my condo. Frustrated, I set it down before it became a victim of my temper. Rising to my feet, I pace the living room with my hands entrenched deep in the sides of my hair. Gripping it tightly, I breathe in through my nose and slowly exhale through my mouth. After a few repetitions of this, I feel my muscles relax. I take a moment to mentally pat myself on the back in congratulations that nothing got busted while anger flooded my body. Taking a seat on my couch, I sink into it and try valiantly to blank my thoughts. It doesn’t work, and my brain is flooded with images of Rex and last night.

The Devil’s Angels tech guy is easy to look at and even easier to fantasize about. Being a few inches over six-foot tall, lean, muscled body with dark brown hair and eyes the color of milk chocolate, he’s gorgeous. Another check mark on my list is that I’ve always been drawn to intelligence, and he has that in spades. I don’t know many of the members very well yet, but I noticed him from the start. Chatting with him last night simply enhanced my attraction to him. He’s smart, funny, and kind. I know my brother thinks the world of him, so that is a plus too.

The images of him from last night make me almost moan again in pleasure. The feel of his hands, body, and mouth on mine will take more than booze to erase from my memories. Apparently, though, that’s a one-sided kind of thing. The heat that had started to flood my body from the memories alone suddenly disappears. Nothing hurts a woman’s self-confidence more than having been so easily forgotten. While he made a huge impact on me, I made none on him. Ouch. Booze may be the only thing that takes the sting out of that realization.

Taking a moment to sort through my feelings, I realize I’m more hurt and embarrassed than anything else. The fact that he doesn’t remember—or won’t admit to remembering last night is a blow to everything in me that’s female. The only thing I can do at this point is to bury the beginning feelings I’d had about him, pretend I’m not hurt, and that last night was just one big party. Nothing else and certainly nothing special to me.

Having made my plan, I text Lisa.

Me: You feeling better?

Lisa: Yeah, kind of. We got trashed, girlfriend!

Me: Definitely did. You and Reeves? Is that a thing?

Lisa: No, never has been until last night. I don’t remember everything, but I do remember his ass. That man has a fine ass!

I laugh at Lisa’s comment and wish silently that I could take what happened last night as easily as she seems to be doing. Of course, it helps that she’s half-crazy most days.

Me: That he does.

Lisa: Did you and Rex hook up? You two looked very cozy last night.

Me: Not sure what happened. I’m fuzzy after we got to the clubhouse.

I feel instant guilt and regret for lying to my new friend. I know if I told her the truth, though, she’d want to get a girl gang together and kick Rex’s ass. I don’t want that. I just want to forget it all and forgive myself for thinking I could be someone special to him.

Lisa: Let’s go out this Friday. Maybe we can still have as much fun but with a little less alcohol?

Me: Absolutely. It’s a date. Feel better, chicka.

Lisa: You too. Hugs

Setting my phone down, I get busy getting all the things done that adults have to do before their work week starts.

“Hi, Mom,” I say as I give her a quick kiss on the cheek and then take my seat across from her.

My mother, Giana, and I meet for lunch every Monday. Most times my brother Les and sometimes Drew join us. Drew is also known as Chubs, but that’s a name I just can’t bring myself to use. I know the club doesn’t use it in a mean way, but it’s still something I can’t call him.

“Hi, honey. Les said he’d be here in a few minutes, but Drew is busy today,” Mom informs me.

“Probably busy with a tow. Want to bet that he has a pig riding with him today?” I ask, joking about the fact that Ava’s pet pig, Gee, rides shotgun a lot with my brother.

“I never thought I’d like a pig, but that little guy’s just the cutest!” Mom gushes with a huge smile.

“He really is, but Mac’s my favorite,” I state.

“He’s a beautiful bird, but the language that comes out of him,” Mom replies with a sad shake of her head and a tiny cringe.

I smile because my mother is a true lady with the manners that go with one. She came from a very wealthy family and was raised to be prim and proper no matter what was happening around her. She went to all the right girls-only boarding schools and learned the proper way to hold a teacup, along with a lot about managing a household. She learned the important skills of correct posture, the proper walk, and how to support whoever her important husband may be. Luckily for her, her father also insisted she be well-read and educated in regular subjects too.

The only “unladylike” thing my mother did was refuse the highly suggested and well-connected marriage her father wanted her to have. Instead, she married one of Chicago’s rising stars in the underground world of the mob. Not that she knew that’s who she was marrying. She thought Enzo Zanetti was a businessman who was very good at what he did. He was excellent at what he did, but being a businessman was not where his skill set was best used. Enzo made a name for himself at an early age by having no conscience when it came to killing. Unfortunately, my mother didn’t figure that out until she was married and had a baby on the way.

If it weren’t for Enzo’s job, he and my mother would have had a beautiful life together. They loved each other in a way that is rare to witness. They had three children together, and we were raised in a loving home. I didn’t even know what my father’s real profession was until he was arrested. My brothers knew but kept that knowledge from me. It was a blow to find out what he was being charged with, but not as much as finding out that he had been grooming my brothers to follow in his footsteps. Who loves their children but, at the same time, wants them to join the mafia? Who loves their wife as much as I thought he’d always loved his but makes her live with the knowledge that he was a paid killer?

“Aria? Aria?” my mother says before laying her hand on my arm.

I mentally shake myself back to the present and turn a smiling face toward Mom.

“Sorry. Was thinking about a client I’m seeing today. What were you saying?” I ask as I reach for my water glass.

“How are you settling into your new partnership?” Mom repeats.

“Good. Very good. I really like my partner. She makes the day fun and treats the staff great,” I answer.

My brother Les walks up and drops a light kiss on my cheek before doing the same to Mom. Les is barely seated when the waiter appears. Les quickly scans the menu, and we give our orders. As the waiter departs, Les turns to me with a grin on his face.

“Saturday night was fun. I never saw myself hanging out with bikers, but I must admit, they know how to party,” Les says.

“Yeah, same for me. Lucy and Lisa are cool, too,” I state while working to keep my facial expression bland.

“What time did you four decide to call it a night?” Les asks.

“I don’t know. It was late, and I paid for it yesterday,” I reply while praying our food shows up soon so I can use eating as an excuse for not talking. “What did you do Saturday night, Mom?”

“The usual. I ate an early dinner and then watched a documentary about Ted Bundy. It was good,” Mom says with a small smile.

“God, Mom. Can’t you watch something that doesn’t include serial killers?” Les asks in an exasperated voice.

“True crime fascinates me, and it was a well-done documentary,” Mom answers in a defensive tone.

Our mother has always been a true crime buff. She watches all the crime shows and reads all the books, and it skeeves me and my brothers right the hell out, considering she’s married to a killer. The only thing I can think of to explain her fascination is maybe she’s trying to figure out what made my dad do the things he did. Maybe she’s hoping she’ll figure something out that excuses his behavior.

Not that we kids will ever think there’s an excuse for him, but I think Mom still loves him now as much as she did before. I know she doesn’t condone the things he did. She’s been angry with him ever since his arrest, but I don’t think that’s stopped her love for him. It’s not something she will discuss with me, no matter how many times I try to get her to. She gets tight-lipped anytime Dad is mentioned or when one of us suggests she moves on with her life without him.

We chat about things in our new lives until our food arrives. Glancing at my watch, I know I have to eat fast so I’m not late for my next patient. I squish my BLT sandwich down, cut it in half, and take a huge bite.

“It’s nice to see Drew isn’t the only one in the family with a big appetite,” Les says with a laugh as he points his fork at my face.

“Les! Don’t point utensils at your sister. You were taught manners. Please use them,” Mom chastises.

“Yeah, Les. Use your manners,” I taunt as I take a second bite.

“Aria! Don’t talk with food in your mouth. My God, you two. It’s like you were raised in a barn,” Mom sputters while daintily cutting her chicken breast into small pieces.

I growl and smack Les’s hand when he steals a French fry from my plate, but I return the favor by stealing one of his onion rings.

“I give up. I don’t know where I went wrong with you kids,” Mom mutters.

“So, I have to ask. Did Lisa and Reeves hook up Saturday night?” Les asks while glancing at me.

I inhale a sharp intake of breath and immediately choke on the bite of food in my mouth. I cough, choke, and endure Les smacking me between the shoulder blades for several seconds before I can breathe again.

“You okay?” Les asks as he turns back to his food.

“Yeah, I’m good,” I reply, then take a sip of water and wipe my eyes with my napkin.

“So, did they? It looked like that’s where it was going when we parted for the night. Lisa couldn’t take her eyes off Reeves’ ass and—” Les says before getting interrupted by Mom.

“Les! That’s not a topic to discuss over lunch. First, it’s none of your business. Second, that’s Lucy’s sister you’re gossiping about. Lucy is going to be our family soon, and that makes Lisa family too. Gossiping is in bad taste. Besides, I’m not sure which one is Reeves. Is he that gorgeous one with the longish hair and nearly golden eyes? Oh, my, that one is fine. Like really fine,” Mom says with her voice softening toward the end.

Les and I both burst out laughing at her, and I watched as her cheeks pinkened. Even my prim mother has noticed Vex’s hotness.

“No, Mother, the one you’re calling ‘really fine’ is Vex, and he’s very married. Sorry to say. Reeves works at the security office with Rex and Pigeon. Reeves looks a lot like Rex, except that Rex is always neat and well-groomed. Reeves always looks like his razor died three days ago. His hair is always in need of a trim, and Rex looks like he just walked out of GQ magazine. Pigeon has the long hair and is the one that constantly says, ‘my wife’ this or ‘my wife’ that in every conversation,” I explain.

“Oh, I see. Well, either way, it’s impolite to gossip,” Mom answers with a pointed look at Les.

Silently thanking my mother’s interruption, I turn back to my food. I just might make it through this meal without Les picking up on anything from me. It’s always been hard keeping things from my brothers, and they know me well enough to notice my tells. I sneak a peek at Les and instantly regret it. He’s staring at me with a questioning look in his eyes. I decide to forfeit the rest of my meal and get out of here before he starts asking questions I don’t want to answer.

“I have to get back to the office. I need to look at my next patient’s chart before she arrives,” I say as I set my napkin down and stand. “Thanks for lunch, Les. I know you’re just dying to pay for mine, so I’ll graciously let you. Bye, Mom. Chat later.”

I make my escape and breathe easier once I’m in my car and exiting the parking lot.

Getting home from work, I decide to treat myself. I strip and only put on a short silky robe, then I get everything laid out for a night of pampering. I put hair oil on my scalp and a hair mask on the rest of my hair. I wrap a turban around my hair and sit down at my makeup table. I wax my brows, then do a lash lift. I add a lip stain that looks crazy because it starts out a bright blue but changes once it’s removed. I go full out and apply a mud mask, then go back to waxing other areas that I’m too embarrassed to ask for at a spa.

I giggle a little to myself when I apply the hot wax because I’ve seen the video of Axel’s waxing experience. Men are such wimps. Women survive way worse than waxing every day. Hearing my doorbell, I pause and frown.

I wasn’t expecting anyone, so I grab my phone and pull up the doorbell app. Spotting my brother Drew, I hit the speaker symbol.

“Hey, bro, what’s up?” I ask while getting a good look at myself in the full-length mirror. Yikes!

“Let me in, Aria. I have food,” Drew, better known as Chubs here in Denver, answers with a large grin.

“Uh, I’m not really decent and—” I start to explain but get cut off.

“Throw on some clothes and let your big brother in before I sit down on your step and start eating in full view of your neighbors,” Drew warns while eyeing the many bags and cartons in his hands.

Brothers can be a blessing or a curse, and right now, mine is no blessing.

“Fine! Just a minute,” I answer with a grumble.

I’m kind of scary to see right now, but it’s just my brother, and food sounds good. Checking to make sure my robe is decent enough, I make my way to the front door. Unlocking it, I pull it open and step out of Drew’s way as he rushes through the door.

“Not one comment on how I look either. You just interrupted me treating myself with a full-on beauty routine kind of thing,” I mumble since moving my mouth isn’t that easy now that the mud has dried on my face.

“Not one word, I promise.”

I whirl in surprise to the still-open door and find a grinning Rex stepping through it. My mouth would have dropped open in horror if the mud wasn’t holding it almost completely closed.

“Eeeek!” I squeak while remaining frozen in place. “Oh, my fucking God.”

“Where is my beautiful sister, and what did you do to her?” Drew asks before laughing loudly.

My head swings to see him pulling out his phone, and that’s the exact moment I decide I need to exit the room. It’s also the exact moment I realize the wax I had put in some delicate places has now cooled and hardened. It’s pulling on some areas that should never be pulled, and I’m not sure what kind of permanent damage I’m about to do by running to the safety of my bedroom.

“Don’t you dare! Put that fucking phone away or so help me, I’m—” I sputter indignantly.

“I’m texting Lucy that I’m going to be a few minutes late,” Drew interrupts me to say. “And while I would never video you like this, Les would pay me good money for one if I did. What have you done to yourself? Is all of this supposed to be a beauty thing?”

I drop my head for a beat before checking to make sure my robe is covering everything it needs to. Avoiding Rex’s eyes, I flip my bother off, and then I walk out of the room as carefully as I can manage. It still hurts, and I know I’ve lost more hair down there than I intended. Brazil, here I come.

Shutting my bedroom door behind me, I give in to the urge to moan painfully. Having forgotten that I had already applied the wax, then walking through the condo, I’ve now got wax smeared pretty much everywhere. I, with much discomfort and now sympathizing a little with Axel, take care of the wax situation before heading for the shower.

I get dressed and pull my wet hair up in a clip before deciding I have stalled long enough. I have to go back out there and face Rex again. Why is he even here? It would have been nice if I didn’t see him again until I’d lost weight or got a new haircut. Anything to make him realize he’d messed up by letting me slip through his fingers, but no. That’s not how my life works. At least I won’t be forgettable this time, even if it’s for all the wrong reasons.

Entering the kitchen, I again avoid Rex’s eyes and take a seat at the bar next to my brother. Ignoring both of them, I grab a set of chopsticks and select a takeout container. Opening it, I get the first bite almost to my mouth when they start laughing loudly.

“Mention anything you saw here tonight, and I will stab you in the eye with my chopsticks,” I say in a flat tone before placing the food in my mouth.

“I see the shower helped improve your mood,” Drew states dryly.

“Fuck you. Fuck you. And, oh yeah. Fuck you,” I respond while continuing to eat. “Why are you both here anyway?”

“I asked Rex a few days ago to come and look over your security system. It’s a standard one that comes with a lot of new condos, but it can be improved upon. Thought I’d feed him for doing it,” Drew answers between bites of food.

“Well, it obviously needs to be improved because I didn’t see Rex on the doorbell camera. It only showed your ugly face,” I say, then elbow my brother in the ribs.

“I was still getting equipment out of the van,” Rex explains, and I can feel his eyes on me.

When my doorbell rings again, I drop my chopsticks and walk to the door. Walking is on the painful side, with important parts of me raw from being accidentally waxed. I move with caution, but I’m hoping it’s not noticeable.

Opening the door, I inwardly groan. Stepping aside, I wave Reeves through the door. He grins and makes his way toward the sound of the other men’s voices. I follow at a slower pace, and take my seat again, carefully, when I get to the bar.

“Food! Fucking awesome. I’m starving,” Reeves states before helping himself.

I reach over to the pack of beer sitting on the bar, pull one out, and hand it to him. He winks before taking it, twisting the cap off and downing a third of it in one long swallow. When he lowers his beer, he continues looking at me. Confusion crosses his face. I start to get nervous as to why he’s staring at me when he speaks.

“Did you take a bath with me the other night?”

The room goes dead silent, and all movement stops. Drew goes deathly still beside me.

“No! What the hell, Reeves? No, I didn’t take a bath with you!” I nearly shriek and then hastily turn to my brother. “That’s a no! A big, fat no! Your friend has a drinking problem. Maybe he’s unaware of it, but he does. He needs an intervention.”

Drew hesitates for a moment while looking me in the eyes. He then aims his gaze at Reeves.

“Aria wouldn’t lie to me, so now I have to wonder why you’d think she was in a tub with you. Are you having dreams about my little sister that may make me turn violent, Brother Reeves?”

“No, I don’t think so. I was really fucking drunk, so I may not be remembering anything right,” Reeves answers with a shrug. “Hell, parts of my brain even thought it was Pigeon in the tub, but that would be too disgusting to even think about.”

“You know he can’t handle his booze, Chubs. He’s a lightweight. Probably passed out drunk and was hoping someone would share a tub with him,” Rex says with a strained laugh. “Come on, Reeves. Let’s get this system checked over and improved before your muddled brain gets you hurt.”

“Yeah, alright, brother. Sorry, Aria. Didn’t mean to cause a problem,” Reeves states before following Rex out of the room.

“Aria, if—” my brother starts to say, but I cut him off this time.

“No, Drew. I don’t know where his brain came up with that idea, but the closest to Reeves that I got was a few dances Saturday night. You were there for them, in fact. We should look into rehabs for him,” I say while feeling a little guilty for making it sound like Reeves really did have a drinking problem.

“Okay, sister. I believe you. It’s just kind of an unspoken rule in the club about dating other guy’s family members. It can be done, but it should be discussed between the two guys first. It’s just a matter of respect, I guess. Like Horse and Tessie. Horse will not ask her for a date or do anything with her until he speaks with Vex. Vex gives his permission, then Horse is free to move forward with Tessie. It’s kind of archaic, but it’s our way.”

“I get it, but what would happen if Horse didn’t and chose to make his moves anyway?” I ask.

“Most likely would end up with Horse getting a beat down by Vex and/or other members that didn’t agree with Horse doing that. Even though it’s an unspoken rule, it’s one we all honor,” Drew explains and then turns back to his food.

I nod as if I understand, even though I really don’t. I mean, in a way, I do, but I’m still not fluent in all things biker. I know the mafia way of things and not so much the biker way of things. I resisted the mafia’s way of doing things, especially when it came to the women. I’m learning, and I’m trying not to be judgmental because everyone in the club seems to be really nice. The women have a choice about who they are with, and that’s not always the case in the mafia. Marriages were often about alliances and duty. I just have a lot to learn yet, so I need to keep an open mind.

Thinking over what Drew said, I realize that could be Rex’s fate. He could end up taking a beating over what we did, and that almost makes my dinner make a reappearance. No way do I want or think he needs one to make amends for both of our actions. Would my brother really ask for that? I can’t imagine the guy I grew up with would think that’s an appropriate response for two consenting adults spending the night together. Maybe my sweet, lovable brother Drew really has changed since joining the club. All I know for certain is that nobody can find out what happened between Rex and myself.

“Several things need to be upgraded, Chubs. The basic system can be beaten in less than a minute. Do you want me to make the same changes here that I did at your mom’s place?” Rex asks as he and Reeves walk back into the room.

“Yes, definitely. When will it be completed?” my brother asks.

“Hello. Remember me? Owner of said property,” I interject.

“You want the changes that Rex will make, Aria. You’ll be safer here, and I won’t worry so much,” Drew says in a reasonable tone.

“It’s not that I don’t, but I do have stipulations,” I say. “I heard the story of how Pigeon watched Ivy through the shelter’s security system. I don’t want that type of invasive system here. If I want to run through my condo naked with scissors, I don’t want someone to be able to watch and video it.”

“Hearing that, I most definitely think she should have that system,” Reeves says with a smirk. “I would personally monitor that camera 24/7 just to ensure your sister’s safety.”

“Shut it, Reeves,” Rex snaps.

“Just saying it wouldn’t be a hardship,” Reeves mutters.

“I get what you’re saying, Aria. Let’s have Rex explain the differences between the systems and make a decision that will keep you safe but not intrude on your privacy,” Drew suggests.

“Okay,” I mutter.

“Give me a day or so to go over the specs and get back to you with some options,” Rex says, looking pointedly at me.

“Okay,” I repeat, briefly meeting Rex’s eyes.

Within moments, Rex and Reeves left my home. Silence reigns for a moment before Drew stands to leave also. Turning to face him, I again thank God for bringing him back into my life.

“I better get moving. Lucy’s parents are holding dinner for me and her to get there,” Drew states with a grin.

“You just ate a… Never mind. I almost forgot who I was talking to. Love you,” I say while accepting a kiss on my cheek.

I close the door behind my brother and secure the locks. I clean up the food containers, grab a bottle of water, and collapse on my sofa. What a shit show this evening’s been. After a few minutes of feeling sorry for myself, I pull myself up and head for my bedroom. I also promise myself that I will not be home when Chubs and Rex return to install the new system.

Leaving the lights off in the bedroom, I brush my teeth by the nightlight in my bathroom. When my nighttime routine is completed, I quickly change into a t-shirt and sleep shorts. Double-checking my alarm, I crawl into bed and sit leaning against the headboard. Picking up the remote, I turn the TV on and flip to the season I’m rewatching of The Challenge. I settle in and let my mind get absorbed with the antics of the competitors.

When my phone chimes with an incoming text, I pick it up to see Rex’s name.

Rex: Are you still awake?

Me: Yeah. I just got in bed though.

Rex: I know tonight was awkward for you. Sorry. I thought Chubs had already told you he asked me to stop by.

Me: He didn’t. It’s fine though.

Rex: We still need to have a chat about Saturday night.

Me: No, we don’t. Nothing happened. Goodnight.

Rex: We both woke up naked, Aria. Something happened.

Me: I don’t remember anything. Goodnight.

I set my phone down and ignore the incoming texts. After the episode I was watching ends, I turn off the TV and roll onto my side. I lay there far longer than I want to before sleep takes over.