Page 14 of The Demon’s Collar (The Bard’s Demon #1)
The second party arrived around dusk, and I was so caught up in the company and the fire that I didn’t even notice B?k at first. When I spotted him, he stood alone by a tiny copse of trees at the top of the hill, watching me.
I slid my lute onto my back, eliciting groans from those who hadn’t had their fill.
But the coward I’d been that morning was gone. I felt whole and confident now…and determined.
I made my way to B?k.
His expression darkened as I approached—but that was so B?k-coded, I didn’t take it for the warning it was. I leaned one elbow on the tree next to him and looked up at his scowling face without fear.
I didn’t like that I’d spent the day afraid to face him. It ate at me. So I forced myself to maintain eye contact and shove down all the thoughts that threatened to make me look away.
He watched me with cool curiosity.
“When we reach the base camp,” I said, “I’ll do what I can to decode your letters. In return, I want access to any historic tomes in the Fated’s possession.”
That was more than fair, no?
In my mind, we were beyond the collar now. B?k had already shown his willingness to forego its use. If I didn’t provoke him, and he didn’t use it, it stood to reason that we could forge new ground and come to an equitable?—
The world flashed before my eyes. One moment, I was leaning against the tree, laying out my proposal.
The next, my back was smashed against the bark, and B?k’s fingers squeezed my throat.
He’d spun me around the tree to a place where the others couldn’t see.
We had privacy that I very suddenly and very much did not want.
“I’ll say this once for your benefit,” B?k said. His tone was flat, and his gaze bore into me. “Only once. So I suggest you listen.”
I couldn’t exactly do otherwise. I fought for breath through his hold. My lute pressed against my back, in danger of being crushed as his weight pinned me.
“Do you know why collars like this—” his pinkie finger slid demonstratively between my throat and the silver and leather, “—still fetch such a good price?”
I managed a jerk of my chin.
“Because they work ,” he said, closing his fist, taking away my air.
“Because they only cause madness in animals that are too simple-minded to understand that fighting the compulsion will destroy their minds. But people? They can understand. They can choose to obey—if they’re not too stupid or too stubborn. ”
He loosened his grip enough for me to gulp in a single deep breath. I looked around wildly. Why hadn’t he said this in the cave? Or when he’d caught me in the woods? Why now, when we were—when we were what? On nearly good terms?
His timing didn’t make sense.
Until it did.
“ Get on your knees ,” he ordered.
The words weren’t just words this time. The command snaked through me like a caster’s fire, prickling at the base of my skull.
The bastard compelled me.
There was a single beat—a suspended moment where the choice was mine. Obey or fight.
But even as my anger rose, his warning sent me reeling. Did he know the collar wouldn’t cause madness so long as I didn’t fight it? Or was this an experiment?
It didn’t matter. I couldn’t risk it.
My knees hit the ground.
Hatred and fury flared white-hot through my body. Tears blurred my vision. I stared hard at the hilltop beyond his feet. Why now? Why at all, really, but especially why now?
He cupped my cheek. My heart trilled with a burst of adrenaline.
“ Look at me,” he ordered.
I listened. I looked up at him in wonder, too hurt to care if he enjoyed my tears. Though the prickle of compulsion was still there, I barely felt it when I gave in quickly.
B?k studied me right back, still with those empty eyes. It wasn’t normal. The air around us was just air—devoid of his usual stir of emotion. How could he do this and feel nothing ?
I felt everything. It was every acquaintance who’d ever left without saying goodbye. Every casual promise forgotten. Every lover who’d spurned me.
Betrayal .
How many times did I have to learn this lesson? How many times did I have to remind myself not to trust someone just because I wanted to? Because they were pretty or kind or interesting or a good fuck?
“I’m not your friend,” B?k said, as though to underscore my point. “I’m not your lover, Ero. I’m not someone you get to negotiate with. You belong to me. Do you understand?”
Ero. Not kitten. Why did that chafe?
I gave a jerky nod.
“I said,” he bit out, “ Do you understand ?”
The prickle returned—the feeling that if I didn’t answer, I would come apart from the inside out.
“Yes,” I gasped. “Yes, I understand.”
His hand fell away from my face. For once, I didn’t trust myself to speak.
My tendrils stretched in every direction, keening their agitation.
One rogue tendril snaked up, wedging itself between my throat and the collar, tugging in outright defiance before a shocking jolt from the enchantment chased it away.
I needed to right things with B?k— somehow —to return to that shaky ground we’d inhabited before, when he’d agreed not to?—
He never agreed , the voice inside my head taunted. You just assumed he wouldn’t because he hadn’t before.
I sucked in rapid lungfuls of air, breathing so hard my throat strained against the collar.
The constriction made my panic worse, so I closed my eyes and forced measured breaths instead.
Too aware of his eyes and judgment on me.
Too afraid that what he saw would delight him and make him want to do it even more.
But when I opened my eyes, B?k was gone .
I knelt alone in the dirt. The warmth I’d felt all day—the confidence I’d gained—shattered.
I got unsteadily to my feet.
When the tide of disjointed emotions finally subsided, I stumbled back to the fire. The flames danced, distorted through my tears. I ignored calls for more songs.
I hated B?k and then myself and then B?k again in a spinning kaleidoscope of broken thoughts I couldn’t escape.
When a soft hand took mine, I didn’t need to look up to know it was Aelith. Her calm, watery touch had already become familiar.
“Is there anything I can do?” she asked.
“That depends,” I said. “Do your gods know how to kill a demon?”
She smiled.