Page 12 of The Deceptions

But the soul lurking beneath always remembers, holding the weight of everything they’ve endured and that was taken from them.

And mine?

Fuck.

Mine knew them. Loved them. Trusted them with my entire being when I shouldn’t have.

Until the moment they slit my throat, laughed at my pain, told me I was worthless, and watched me fall into a pool of blood, choking on their betrayal.

I gave them everything. My loyalty. My love. My fucking soul. And what did they do? They stomped on it. Crushed it beneath their knives and turned everything we once had to ash.

So unless Jonathan has a miracle up his sleeve, I’ll never be able to stare my former boyfriends in the eyes without giving away every single detail of my past and pain. It’ll blaze through every stare until they take notice.

They’ll know by one look who they’re staring at.

Fuck.

I run a hand down my face, aching for something to take away the pain that encases every molecule in my body.

I can only be strong for so damn long before I break further than I was before. I can only stuff down the despair of my past for so long before it bleeds through my veins and infects me with the memories of the boys I loved the most in this world.

I sit on the edge of my bed, staring at my shoes. Silent tears fall from my eyes, cascading down my cheeks and falling onto my hands.

For years, I've built myself up as this badass chick who can take down a fucking cult, for fuck's sake. Without blinking an eye, I can strangle a fully-grown man, and it's lights out. I can shoot like a professional assassin.

But this?

Having to suck it up and be around who I hate the most has my stomach turning and bile rising in my mouth.

I want to run.

JJ smiles at me when he whirls me around. His golden brown eyes sparkle in the dim sunlight barely filtering through the forest that surrounds us. Our paradise.

"Caught ya," he chuckles, pushing my back into the thick bark of the tree.

"Yeah? And what are you going to do about it?" I taunt, tilting my head, goading him into doing something for once.

This is our game. They chase me through the woods, laughing until they wrap their arms around my waist, push me against a tree, and take my lips with theirs.

But never more. I’m aching to feel their hands dance across my flesh, burning me and marking me as theirs.

"Dangerous questions," Hux whistles, putting his arm above my head and leaning against the tree.

"So dangerous," Mack chuckles, boxing me in from the other side.

"I'm so scared," I quip breathlessly.

Hux bites his bottom lip. "How about we take a tour of the treehouse?" He raises a brow.

My brows raise. "The treehouse, huh?" It was our meeting place when I snuck out of my room to get away from all the fighting and to run from my own abuse.

"Yes," Hux agrees, taking my hand in his and leading me away from the other two as they trail behind. "You're not scared, are you?" He peeks over his shoulder as I snort.

"Scared of what exactly?" I raise a brow.

"When I fuck the life out of you for the first time."

I rear back, heat blooming across my cheeks and down my neck. "You... You want to...?"