Page 1 of The Curious Incident of the Great Cookie Snackcident of 979
Chapter one
Abi
IN WHICH ABI OSPAK ATTENDS HER FIRST DAY OF WORK IN HER NEW PROMOTION, SHARES HER LUNCH, AND MEETS A FRIEND
“Deep breaths, Abi, deepbreaths.” Her hushed words echoed through the chamber that led up to the Lady’s Sepulcher, skittering along the walls and dissipating over the lake.1
Even after years of visiting her goddess weekly, entering the chamber where she floated on the glassy surface of the water still took Abi’s breath every time. The ceiling was at least 200 feet high, and the ground was almost entirely covered in the smooth stillness of the aquifer. A thin strip of shore ringed it, where she and her fellow guards would make their rounds.
Visitors viewed the Lady from the mezzanine level, specifically designed so they could look down on their Lady’s floating form as she slept. Abi had only set foot down there four times—once at her shifting ceremony, a coming of age rite where each child in Sanctuary presented their shifted form to their Goddess, during her Dedication to the Lady, during her initiation into the guards, and finally when she’d been stationed at the door and had needed to ask one of the Sanctum guards a question.
For years Abi had worked for this promotion. At twenty-three, she was the youngest Shade ever to guard the Lady’s resting place, and if she had her way, it was a post she’d occupy for years to come.2 Her hand kept straying to the new knot on her uniform’s shoulder, an indicator of her elevated position as a guard for the inner sanctum. She’d tied her curly white hair back in a tight bun, but knew that by lunch time, she would likely already be surrounded in a halo of escapees.3
Abi’s tunnel spit her out on the same level as their Goddess, so she only saw her in profile, though the proximity only emphasized howlargeshe was. Their Goddessappearedto be a teenager, but she was at least the height of three grown men. For not the first time, Abi wondered how she’d gotten inside the chamber; she couldn’t imagine their Goddess crawling down any of the cramped passages that led to the pool.
The cavern was lit by the glow of lunula, the bioluminescent algae charged with the Lady’s magic, that allowed her people to change their forms.4 Abi’s snowy owl form had shifted her sleep schedule when she’d chosen it. She now preferred keeping a nocturnal schedule and had trouble if she needed to sleep during the night. She rarely tired during night shifts, so when the night position had opened, she’d jumped at the opportunity.
As a child, she’d visited the Lady every week. She’d always been a little scared of the shades that lived here full time, their entire lives spent bathed in the Lady’s aura. Specifically created to guard their Lady full-time, they were affected by the Lady’s magic significantly less than other peoples, but their seclusionlent them an air of mystery; they spent nearly their entire lives underground.
In her years as a guard, she’d worked with several shades, but they’d all been standoffish, and had never worked with her for longer than an hour or so. The few she’d met had spent most of their time blending with shadows and only speaking when required. Now, she’d have a shade for her partner and would spend her entire day within their domain. She was awed, honored, and more than a little intimidated.
After her final tests and an orientation tour in the early evening, they’d released her for a meal break. She clutched her lunch basket to her chest, the meal her mother affectionately packed nestled within. Her mother didn’t make her lunch every day—she was a grown woman—but she knew it was Abi’s first day, and she’d always tried to celebrate life’s victories.
Smiling to herself, Abi wondered what her mother might’ve packed. A sandwich or hand-pie? A wee ceramic of soup? Her mother ran a bakery, so a treat was a foregone conclusion. There was sure to be some sort of baked good.
Settling down on a rock at the edge of the aquifer, Abi crossed her legs and opened the top of her lunch basket. A folded piece of paper sat atop her neatly packed food, and she took it out to read.
Abi dearest,
We are so proud of you. You’re making your dreams come true and fulfilling our charge in the most important way possible. We know you’ll guard our Lady to the best of your ability, as you’ve done for years. I’ve packed a few extra treats to share. We hope you are having a wonderful first day (night) and can’t wait to hear about your first shift!
All our love,
Mum and Pops
Smiling, Abi tucked the note back into her lunchbasket. Each of her mother’s small gestures always felt like a warm hug, even when she was alone.
Looking around, the cavern was entirely unoccupied. She was due to meet her new partner here after her lunch break, so she’d decided to eat here rather than in the break area. She’d rather not be late, and it gave her some downtime to spend with her Goddess. For years, she’d regarded the Lady as something of an older sister rather than a mother figure like most people did. She just appeared so young, but that had only made her feel more accessible to Abi growing up. She’d taken to conversing with the Lady as if she were a friend or older sister and hadn’t ever really stopped.
“You’re going to be seeing a lot more of me,” Abi said, digging through her basket to discover a wrapped hand pie, a small salad, some berries, and a stack of cookies. “I’ve gotten a promotion! I’m one of your personal guards now, just like I always told you I’d be. I didn’t ask for you to intervene because that seemed like favoritism, but if you did anyway, thank you.
“I’m supposed to share these cookies with co-workers, but the only other person I anticipate seeing today is my partner, who is a shade ... I suppose I can share with them, but I’m not even certain if shades eat cookies—”
“Oh, we do!” said a smooth voice to her left.
Abi jumped at the sound. Dropping the package of cookies, she whipped her head around to search the shadows. The darknessthickeneduntil it coalesced into a humanoid form. Wisps of shadow rose from the shade’s shoulders and the darkness clung to them, reluctant to let go. Their eyes glowed the same color as lunula only an inch or two above Abi’s own. Like many shades, their body seemed to shift and change as she watched, one second, they’d have broad shoulders and a tiny waist, thenext they’d be rounder like Abi. Upon seeing Abi’s reaction, they gasped, and their hands flew to cover their mouth.
“Oh my Goddess, I didn’t mean to scare you! I’m sorry I seem to have made you have a snackcident! I forget it can be startling sometimes!” The shade, presumably her partner, floated over to Abi, forgoing the appearance of walking that some shades affected, and picked up the packet of cookies. “You must be Abi, I’m Senka.”
Senka held out an amorphous limb that settled into the shape of a hand as their features solidified. Abi grasped it for a firm handshake and took the packet back, smiling. “I am, it’s nice to meet you. And no harm done. If you fancy one, my mum sent cookies. She runs a bakery in town, so they are quite good, as long as you like lemon-lavender.”
“Lemon-lavender? I wouldn’t know, I’ve never tried lavender flavored anything!” they said, swaying to the side in a way that seemed curious and excited. Senka settled down next to her, their form fully solid as they did so. Wisps of shadow rose in a halo around their head, reminding Abi of what hair looked like underwater.
“Only one way to find out then, I suppose!” Abi said, holding them out for Senka. Several of the wisps brushed against her as they reached for a cookie.
“Sorry, they have a mind of their own if I’m not directly controlling them,” Senka said with a grimace. Biting into a cookie, their glowing eyes opened wide, groaning in pleasure. “These are amazing!” they exclaimed around a mouthful of crumbs.
“They’re my favorite. My mum packed my lunch, and she likes to—she doesn’t pack my lunch every day, I just—” she said, heat creeping up from under her uniform collar.