Page 22 of The Cauldronball Run (Outlaw Country #2)

F inal Transcript of Sheriff Grizzley T. Lawman's Interview

Me: Well, Sheriff, that's quite a story. So, you actually won the Cauldronball Run?

Grizz: Won it, hell — I dominated it. Fastest time coast to coast, and I wasn’t even trying to win, I was upholding the damn law. Quarter million gold for doing what I have been doing for thirty years: running down sumbitches too stupid to obey the law.

Me: And how did that change things for you and Deputy Smokie?

Grizz: snorts hat boy went and spent his cut on a wedding ring for that mangy teddy bear. Some shiny rock sitting on a bear paw. I had to buy new spectacles just to confirm I wasn’t hallucinating.

Me: That's actually very sweet. And what about J.J. and Farrah? Any hard feelings about them escaping?

Grizz: waves a massive paw Escape? They didn't escape nothing. I let them sumbitches go on purpose.

Me: You let them go?

Grizz: grins, showing teeth Damn right I did.

After I won that race fair and square, it seemed to me like maybe those two weren't the real malefactors after all.

Just hardworking folks trying to pay their bills and stay out of the poor house.

Besides, Smokie made a compelling argument about love conquering all that horseshit.

Me: What are they doing now?

Grizz: Word is they started up their own ambulance service.

Grimjaw & Moonbeam Emergency whatever-the-hell.

Specialize in treating freaks and weirdos who need medical attention without a bunch of questions.

Completely legitimate operation, all proper licenses and documentation.

They even sent me a business card with a little heart on it.

Me: Do you use their services?

Grizz: scratches his substantial belly Matter of fact, I do.

I had to call them last month when we had some dragon biker with a busted wing.

The normal EMTs went home sick soon as they saw the scales.

That green sumbitch and his witch showed up in twenty minutes, took real good care of the patient. Professional as you please.

Me: No awkwardness about the whole hot pursuit thing?

Grizz: barks out a laugh Hell no. Though the witch told me I was the biggest pain in the ass she ever met. Which, granted, might be true.

Me: Did they ever resolve their financial troubles?

Grizz: Well now, that's between them and the tax man. Though I might've heard something about an anonymous benefactor helping them get their business rolling.

Me: How generous of this anonymous benefactor.

Grizz: grunts There’s a sucker born every minute.

Me: Sounds like everyone got their happy ending.

Grizz: Don’t get mushy on me. Yeah, they’re happy. But me? I been hearing’ chatter about some damn Bigfoot convoy running’ freight through my jurisdiction. Eighteen-wheelers. Sasquatch behind the wheel, like Paul Bunyan with a CDL.

Me: Another potential case?

Grizz: Well now, that remains to be seen. You think a sheriff who accidentally won an illegal road race might be qualified to handle unlicensed trucking violations perpetrated by mythical creatures?

Me: I think you might be exactly the right sheriff for the job.

Grizz: leans forward, jabs a finger at me You’re damn right.

Sheriff Grizzley T. Lawman don’t tolerate unlicensed trucking operations, I don’t care if you’re a man, a monster, or a yeti with steel-toed boots.

They roll into my county without so much as a by-your-leave, they’re gonna learn what hot pursuit looks like.

Me: Sounds like another story entirely.

Grizz: tips hat, stomps out the door Another story? Hell, it’s the same damn story. Me, Smokie, and that godforsaken bear taking on lawbreakers. No one gets away with committing a crime in my jurisdiction. I don’t care how big their damn feet are.

End of Interview

Sheriff Grizzley T. Lawman returns in Bigfoot’s Big Rig Convoy .