Page 23 of The Bride Contract (Princes of Xaavia #1)

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Chapter 23 - Kiahn

“ Shit! ” I repeat, like a fucking geliklik. Not only had my little stunt put her in danger, but she’s now on the floor after I’d dropped her. “Niska, I’m so sorry, I-” I don’t know how to finish that sentence as I reach to help her up. I lost control of myself? You letting me touch you like that drove me insane? I got wound up to the point that I was begging - begging - to bite you?

I suddenly fight the urge to cover my mouth. It would be no use of course, Niska already knows my fangs are out. This isn’t like when I went through the awkward stage of maturing into adulthood and my fangs would protrude at the first hint of a female being in the vicinity.

I’m a fucking prince .

I’m a responsible grown male.

I should have known better.

“I-”

“It’s ok,” Niska says before I get a chance to apologize again. “We both got a little carried away there.”

I wince at that as I watch her straighten my shirt she’s wearing. Her pretty, golden brown skin is flushed and I try to convince myself that I only like the sight so much because it’s so different from the gray of Xaviann skin. It makes no difference, though. I can’t take my eyes off of her. “Yes, but as my breeding bride, I’m responsible for your safety.” I don’t know what I was thinking. I should have just shown her the basics of using a permission and left her to figure the rest out. I was so fucking close to bonding this gorgeous little creature to me, and we don’t even know what that would have done to her.

Niska finally looks up at me, her gaze raking over my form before she seems to pause and linger on my crotch. Her brows furrow. “Did you-”

I glance down at myself and then back up to her. Did I come all over myself? Is that what she’s asking? “Yes.”

“But…” she loosely gestures toward me with a pointed finger. “But I didn’t even touch you.”

“Yes,” I say slowly, not quite sure where the confusion is coming from as I distinctly recall her gripping my horn while she allowed me the honor of playing with her cunt. “But you let me touch you .”

“Yeah, sorry, I just-” she babbles, her head shaking and her hands making strange, back and forth gestures between the two of us. “No-one’s ever-”

“Niska,” I say, taking her flapping hands in mine, covering them to make her look at me. “You trusted me enough to let me take you to your peak. As a result, I reached my own. I do not understand why this puzzles you.” She stares up at me with those big brown eyes and I cannot help that my gaze drops to her slightly parted lips. “And-” I pause, huffing and tipping my head back, “-and you probably should not have given me that trust.”

“You’re ridiculous, do you know that?”

My gaze snaps to hers instantly. I… I am not used to being spoken to like this if it’s not coming from my own family. No-one else in my Principality would dare.

So why is cock starting to harden again? For fuck’s sake, Kiahn, get control of yourself.

I growl to myself and avert my gaze to the ground, my eyes snagging on the puddle of Niska’s undergarments and for more than I second, I wonder if she’ll let me keep them. Fuck, Kiahn, get a grip! “I know, and I apologize for almost losing control,” I say, absently rubbing at my horn.

“That’s not what I’m talking about, Kiahn.”

Goddess , but I do love hearing her say my name. “It’s not?” I ask, glancing back up at her.

“No! I’m talking about you beating yourself up over not even hurting me. You didn’t do anything Kiahn.”

I groan. She doesn’t get it. She doesn’t understand how much I wanted to make her mine - how close I was to clamping down on her neck with my fangs and fucking her hard to stake my claim. A million times with her permission would still not be enough for me to overcome this urge I have for her.

“You didn’t do anything,” she repeats, her voice a little softer.

I close my eyes, and take a breath before doing my best to level her with an even stare, trying to remind myself that she is just a contract bride. This shouldn’t be so difficult. “But I could have, Niska. So easily. You were so vulnerable for me… and…”

“And?”

Ah, shit.

My shoulders sag. “And… I liked it.”

Her lips quirk up on one side - a minute gesture that I find so infuriatingly attractive, that I start to think this little human is going to ruin me for all future breeding contracts. Honestly, it’s a startling question to ask myself, but I genuinely wonder if I’ll ever be able to get my cock erect for a female that isn’t her? Will I have to imagine Niska when I’m mounting my next bride?

I shake my head, trying to knock loose the wildly inappropriate and disrespectful thought.

“What’s so bad about liking it?”

I sigh. “Maybe we need to rethink this contract.” Even as I say the words out loud, I want to stuff them back into my mouth with my fists and swallow them back down like a mad-male. “Let me walk you back to your rooms.”

Niska crosses her arms and cocks a brow at me, and I know right then and there that I’m actually already ruined for all other females. Why is my heart racing right now?

“Actually, I think I’m going to stay right here for the night.”

“In my simulator?” I ask, feeling caught off-guard, and genuinely puzzled.

Niska scoffs and playfully slaps my bare chest as she walks straight past me and out into my bedchambers, delicately peeling off the patches at her temples as she goes. “No, I thought we could have a little sleepover.”

“I… do not understand.”

“You keep beating yourself up over nothing,” she says, handing me the simulator patches back. “And I’m going to prove to you that it doesn’t matter how vulnerable I am with you. You’re not going to hurt me. I trust you. So I’m going to spend the night here, with you,” she pauses and puts her hand up, “just sleeping. No more funny business.”

“Funny… business .” I stare at her after repeating her words, not quite seeing the humor in all of this. “That was funny to you?” I ask, hooking my thumb over my shoulder to indicate back at my simulator. If this is true, then I have a lot more research to do on human culture and what they find amusing.

“No, I mean, we’re not going to do anything sexual. We’ll just share a bed. We can lay down together… talk… and cuddle maybe.”

She says all these words as she’s climbing up onto my bed. The Xaviann-size piece of furniture somehow making her look even smaller as she has to heft herself up onto the mattress. Momentarily, my focus is caught on the way my shirt rides up on her soft thighs, and I remember that she’d left her undergarments back in my simulator room. She is bare.

She is on my bed, and she is bare.

“Kiahn?” Niska asks, her voice coming through the fog of distraction like she were far away. She’s peering at me from over her shoulder, and that look in her eye tells me I’ve been caught staring. “Are you coming to bed?” she giggles as she peels back my blankets and starts to tuck herself in.

Fuck , if that’s not a sight to behold.

I rub at my horn and then drop my hand so that I can palm the back of my neck. “Xaviann’s… don’t really… share bedchambers, let alone beds. And especially not with their breeding brides.”

“Really? Never?”

I shake my head.

She looks around, the certainty and playfulness gone from her expression. “Should I go? Is it disrespectful for me to be here?”

I can’t help it, my feet take me a step closer and I reach out as if I were about to physically stop her from leaving. “ No! ”

Judging by the way her head whips my way, I may have startled her with the ferocity of my reaction. I’d never considered sharing my bed with someone. I know Zann sometimes falls asleep in other people’s quarters after mating in the flesh, but he has always been one to go against the grain, and personally, I’ve never seen the appeal.

I do now, though.

“No,” I repeat more softly now, my arms out in front of me, palms down as I approach the side of my bed. “Please stay. That sounds…” fucking amazing and agonizing at the same time? Like both torture and a gift? “…nice.”

The word doesn’t seem enough, but I stop analyzing words and their worthiness when Niska smiles at me. “Yeah, nice,” she murmurs, her features beaming like there’s a light-source somehow inside her.

In a daze, I watch her eyes trace down my body, and I try not to make it too obvious that I’m trying to square my shoulders, and puff out my chest under her inspection. But then her gaze snags on my pants and her smile changes as she bites on her bottom lip.

I follow her line of vision.

Ah.

Right.

I should probably go and wash my seed off myself and change into clean clothing.

“I’m just going to…” my words trail off as I hook a thumb over in the direction of my washrooms. Niska grins and nods her head as I walk backward, not wanting to turn away from the sight of her sitting against my pillows until the very last moment.

Once inside my bathing chambers, I take a moment to close my eyes and take a deep, fortifying breath before going to my basin and bracing myself over it. There is a reflection glass hung above and I find myself staring intently at my image. Alright, do not spook this female, Kiahn. You came so fucking close to bonding her to you, and you can’t afford to slip up like that again. After my brief pep-talk, I ask the ship’s command for cool waters. The basin starts to fill up instantly, but before I can scoop some up to splash on my heated face, a slight glisten to two of my fingers on my right hand catches my eye.

Lifting my hand, my mind is promptly flooded with memories of mere moments ago, where those two fingers had been hooked inside the welcoming cunt of that beautiful little creature out there while she used my permission to suck on her sensitive little clit. Without thought or protest, I put my fingers into my mouth to savor the taste of her. My eyelids fall, and I can’t help the low, animalistic groan that comes out of me.

“Are you ok in there?”

Shit! My eyes fly open again. “Yes!” I call out, the answer almost mumbled from around my fingers. I’m not done sucking them clean yet. “I’m fine!”

I glare at my reflection again, as if this was all his fault.

Just… be normal. For fuck’s sake!

After a shower of cool waters, I re-enter the bedchamber wearing my softest, sand-colored pants. I normally sleep naked, but I don’t think that would be wise in this ‘sleep-over’ situation my Niska is asking for. She smiles at me and pats the space beside her, inviting me to my own bed.

Never have I slid between my sheets with my heart pumping the way it is right now.

And now I lay here, on my back, staring straight up to my bedchamber ceiling like I have a million times before whenever we travel on this ship. Except this time, I am obsessively aware of the presence beside me.

Niska giggles, and I turn my head to look at her. “Are you holding your breath?”

“No.”

Was I?

Maybe.

The smile she has on her face could rival every sunset I have ever seen.

She’s laying on her side, her head propped on her hand, elbow bent and digging into the pillow - my pillow. The blankets covering her from chest to toe do nothing to hide the form of her. I can clearly see the valley of her waist and the crest of her hip. There’s just something about that shape that is so inviting. The Earth Goddesses knew what they were doing when they made human women this way.

“What do we do now?” I ask, prying my gaze away from the landscape of her body.

Niska laughs lightly again. “We can talk. What do you want to talk about, Prince Kiahn ?”

I give her a look. She’d said my title correctly, but the tone had been teasing.

I let it slide, of course.

I think there are a lot of things that I would let slide for this female.

“What is… cuddle?”

Niska raises her brows at my question. I wet my lips before continuing.

“Before, you said that we could lay together, talk, and maybe cuddle. What is it?”

The grin she gives me is eclipsed by the way she scoots her body forward, pressing herself to my side. She then lifts my arm and settles it over her shoulder, molding herself to me. “This is a cuddle,” she explains, laying her head on my chest as one of her legs hooks over mine.

I am frozen to the spot, but I can feel my fangs start to slowly slide from my gums. “ Oh .”

“Breathe, Kiahn,” Niska laughs, lightly tapping my chest. “It’s meant to be nice.”

“It is nice… It’s very nice… Really, really nice.”

“But your heart sounds like it’s trying to burst out of your chest right now,” she leans up to look down at me. “Are you sure you’re ok with this?”

I shake my head, my arm tightening on her in case she tries to move away. “It is just my first time participating in a cuddle. I’m sure I’ll calm down once the novelty wears off,” I lie through my fangs.

Niska chuckles, but lays her head back down on my chest, her hand coming up to draw nonsensical patterns on my pectoral with her fingertip. I’d never considered embracing someone in bed before. It’s thrilling, and yet cozy at the same time. I can feel every breath my little Niska is taking, her chest pressed into my side. How do humans do this and not immediately start mating with each other?

Then she says in a quiet voice, “tell me more about your family,” and suddenly all thoughts of mating flee my mind and my fangs practically disappear in their hasty retreat.

“My… family?”

“Yes,” she says, her finger making swirls on my chest. “I just want to talk to you like a normal person. Not two people with a contract. Not a prince and the human he bought-”

“Technically, my Aunt purchased you for me, so…”

She barks out a musical laugh and playfully slaps my chest. “So nothing. That’s still weird as hell!”

Right. It is, isn’t it?

I rub at my horn, staring at the ceiling while I let out a long breath. “My family? Well, there’s my brothers, Aunt and cousin, but you’re on your way to getting to know them pretty well so far.”

“I really like Vel,” she tells me, “her obsession with humans is sweet. She’s always asking us random questions. This morning she asked Jaya what the purpose of a rubber duck is.”

I chuckle along with Niska, though I do not quite understand what a ‘duck’ is or why its purpose would be baffling. “She is a good person, my cousin. But if her questions ever get too invasive or…” I wave my free hand around at the wrist as if that would pull the right words from my lips, “… weird , just let me know. She is a very intelligent Xaviann, but sometimes she can let her special interests run away into obsessions. She’s been trying to learn everything there is to know about your species since we were younglings. It is very strange.”

Niska lifts her head to peer down at me. She’s so close that I can see the flecks of gold in her brown eyes. “Aren’t you glad of her ‘weird obsession’ now? Considering she knows how to take care of us so well?”

My gaze falls to her lips and I swallow. “Yes,” I reply, my voice a little hoarse. “But I would like to learn how to take care of you.”

Niska smirks. “Well, then, sounds like you could learn a lot from my girl and her ‘special interests’.”

I grunt in agreement as she settles back down on me, nestling her cheek into my chest as her hand goes back to tracing circles and loops on my skin. There is silence for a time. My chambers are dim with only minimal up-lighting at this hour, but my senses feel heightened somehow, with Niska performing a ‘cuddle’ on me. I love the sensation of her pressed to me, the warmth of her relaxed body, the scent of her surrounding me. I even find myself returning the gesture of Niska’s swirling finger patterns as I mirror her fingertip’s dance on her exposed hip.

I don’t know what it is that makes me say it, but the words, “ my mother is dead ,” ring out in the quiet room and for a beat or two, I don’t even realize I’d said them out loud.

I can feel Niska tense, but she is soon leaning up on her elbow to look down on me again, a concerned looking expression cresting her brow. “I’m so sorry, Kiahn. When did she pass?”

“When Zann was still very small - just a babe who had barely finished suckling.” I wet my lips as she continues to peer down at me. I don’t talk about this. Ever. But something about Niska - ‘cuddling’ with her, makes me want to spill a million thoughts to her all at once. I clear my throat and look away. Meeting her gaze is too much. “My father, I do think he had a lot of genuine affection for her. He sired us three on her when he should probably have been entertaining other contracts with brides from other principalities. I remember him visiting from the capital often to play duos, tiles, even northern spin ball with us - a game very unbecoming for a king.” I chuckle lightly, but there’s not much humor behind it. “He went above and beyond his duty to fulfill his end of the contract, and he wrote to her often, even when he was in the middle of other bridal contracts.”

I chance a glance at Niska, but look away again quickly. Her expression is so open, so encouraging, it almost scares me to think about what I might confess when she looks at me like that.

“He… when he sired my youngest brother, he bit my mother.” I hear Niska suck in a breath and hold onto it. “It was an accident. She bonded to him.”

I open my mouth to continue, but find the words behind my tongue all jumbled and unintelligible, so I promptly close it again, tensing my jaw. A small, soft hand cups my face and turns me to face her. “What happened to her?”

I take a deep breath. “She did not fare well under the one-sided bond. She… she stopped eating. When she wasn’t weeping or raging, she would stare off into the middle-distance lost in her own mind. She wasn’t herself. She filed her own horn off to scribe my fathers name on her bedchamber walls over and over again.”

“That’s awful,” Niska whispers, her eyes watery and her brows pinched.

“Aunt Zalora pleaded with my father to visit more often - to stay in our principality even, considering. But you could tell he was getting more and more horrified and saddened by mother’s condition each time he did visit, until he just stayed away. This obviously made her mental state worse.” I pause to swallow. “She caught an infection that her immune system wasn’t strong enough to fight. Aunt Zalora has never forgiven my father for what he did to her sister.”

Niska nods slowly. “And what about you?”

The snort I let loose is soft. “What about me? He is the king, it wouldn’t be wise to point fingers at him. Not when he can so easily cut off my principality and its people. Our lands need harmony, chaos will only bring ruin and suffering.”

On my more generous days, I imagine that my father stayed away due to the heavy weight of guilt at what he had done to my mother. I remember being there when Aunt Zalora had called him to deliver the news of her death, his projected image hovering over one of our palace conference room tables. His expression had crumpled, and he was that male I remember seeing when he would visit to play games with us again. I genuinely think he had loved her. He told me how sorry he was for what had happened. Both Zann and Az were still too young to hear it.

But then there was a knock at the door behind him. A servant called through the polished darkwood that his new contract bride was strapped to the breeding bench and ready for him. His expression had hardened, and I don’t think I’ve glimpsed the other version of my father since. I’ve heard whispers that he’s had my mother’s portrait commissioned over a dozen times since her death, but what good that does to ease his conscience, I don’t know.

Niska’s eyes shift between both of mine, and she looks as though she wishes to ask more about my feelings toward my father. And in the state I feel myself in? Warm, and participating in my very first ‘cuddle’ with my Niska? I think I would answer her.

Instead, she must read it clearly on my features that the topic is understandably a delicate one, and she shows mercy by laying her head back down on my chest and asking, “what was your mother like before all of that? What kind of person was she?”

It takes my mind a little while to unlock the fond memories, but I tell her everything I can, and ask about her family, too.