Page 24

I knew Val was trying to maintain a brave face about something, but I couldn’t place exactly what it was.

Either way, it was obvious something had been eating at him over the last few days. He wasn’t being as warm as usual or telling me about how the club was progressing.

Instead, I could feel the heavy silence between us throughout dinner.

It wasn’t like him to be withdrawn or distant…not when that had been my role before.

More times than not, he was the one prompting me to share what my day was like or how I was feeling, but for some reason, he was quiet.

At first, I wondered if I had done something to upset him, but it didn’t seem targeted at me.

It was easy to see the rigidness of his jaw throughout the meal, or the way he didn’t look at me much, like he was too deep in his head to be aware of his surroundings.

I had hoped he would just come out with it and tell me what was on his mind, but even after several days, nothing seemed to change, and he still hadn’t said anything.

When I got up to rinse my dishes and load them into the dishwasher, I decided I couldn’t sit in that silence any longer.

I needed to know what was going on with him and how I could help if possible.

Eventually, Val did the same and put his dishes away while I lingered there. Once his hands were empty, I took a step towards him and reached for his hand.

“Everything alright?” I asked gently, noting the way he didn’t pull away.

Instead, Val let out a quiet breath and nodded, bringing me a bit closer.

“I’m fine,” he murmured. While it sounded convincing, given how his expression seemed too tense for that to be true, I didn’t believe him.

“Are you sure? You’ve been quieter than usual,” I persisted, trying to be as encouraging as possible, not wanting to push him further into that withdrawn state of his.

“I’m sure,” he returned quietly with a hint of exhaustion in his tone while he wrapped both arms around me, allowing me to share in his warmth. “There’s been a lot going on at work lately, and I’m trying to stay on top of it all. I’m just tired.”

While it very well could’ve been true, I still had the feeling he wasn’t being entirely truthful with me.

I didn’t want to take it to heart, but it was hard not to.

Val had the chance to get out and see more people while being exposed to more in general. He had many things to think about and stew over, but while at the house, Val was the only thing I had outside of my art.

When something was wrong with him, it was apparent, and he couldn’t take the back seat in favor of something else.

That fact made it nearly impossible for me to push anything under the rug and hope for the best.

Before, Val told me there wouldn’t be any secrets between us. That we were going to be open with each other, but at that moment, it didn’t seem like he was upholding his end of that promise.

Looking down at our joined hands, I could see the faint bruising along his knuckles that turned various hues of purple and greenish-yellow while it healed. It wasn’t new by any means, but it was still enough to worry me.

I gently brushed my thumb along that section of skin before glancing back up at him in silent questioning.

I knew his work could be dangerous, and it was unavoidable, but it didn’t stop me from worrying.

He sighed. “It’s not as bad as it looks. We’ve been having more issues with trades lately… tensions are rising.”

While it was something, it was still too vague for me to fully understand.

“Anything you can tell me?” I asked, pulling him a touch closer with as much softness as I could muster.

Val’s expression dropped slightly at that, and he shook his head before resting his forehead against mine. “I would…But I don’t need to involve you in this.”

Even though I could sense the protective air in his words, it still made my stomach twist a bit.

“I’m sure there are some things you can’t share, but you don’t need to shield me from it all,” I reassured him, trying to savor the comfort of his touch. “I want to be there for you, Val.”

“I know you do. But there are some things I don’t need you worrying about,” he murmured, closing his eyes with a gentle breath. His fingers traced absent, almost disarming shapes against my back. “I appreciate your effort, but just know that I’m handling it, okay?”

It wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear, and I still felt like I was in the dark, but I also didn’t want to make things worse for him. It was obvious he was under some kind of pressure, and he didn’t need me piling more on.

“I don’t mean to shut you out…I just need you to trust me,” Val said quietly before pressing his lips against my forehead in a tender kiss.

Closing my eyes, I embraced him loosely in return.

I wanted to believe him, and I wanted to have faith that it was just a passing issue that would eventually be resolved, but the clear unease in him was hard for me to ignore.

“I’ll try.”

I felt his slight smile against my skin before he pulled back enough to cup my face in both hands and take in my features.

“Thank you. I promise you don’t have anything to worry about.”

I had my doubts, but I wasn’t prepared to press any further than I already had.

He had been patient with me before, and I knew I needed to extend that courtesy to him, even if it would be hard.

Regardless of feeling like I didn’t really get anywhere with him, the moment was affectionate enough to soothe some of the doubt in my mind.

At the very least, I knew he wasn’t upset with me, and that counted for something.

Val’s gaze softened, revealing more of his exhaustion, while his thumbs gently swept across my cheeks. “It’s been a long day…I’m going to head to bed. Are you coming?”

Without moving away from his grasp, I glanced at the digital clock on the stove and hummed.

“You go ahead. I think I’ll work on my paintings a bit longer.”

At that, he nodded and gave me a gentle smile. Then, he pressed his lips to mine softly.

The kiss was warm regardless of the tension coiled within him, and I felt the subtle shiver that scurried down my spine as a result.

“I’d tell you not to be up too late, but I know how invested in your work you can get,” Val said, showing a slight flicker of his usual self for as long as he could muster it. “Goodnight.”

He gave me another quick peck before letting go and heading out of the room.

“Goodnight,” I murmured, still aware of the lingering uncertainty in my chest.

Before long, I heard his tired steps moving up the stairs, and I took a deep breath to try and reassure myself.

Once the kitchen was sorted and I turned off the main light, I made my way upstairs to my art room. Bear followed me diligently and slipped into the space with his usual enthusiasm.

When he jumped into the chair and curled up, prepared to stick around for as long as I’d be painting, I scratched between his ears and gave him a small smile.

Then, I pulled my stool up to the easel and got started, continuing my most recent piece.

I had quite a few already, and more than enough contenders to feature in my upcoming showcase, but to be sure of my choices, I wanted to have a wide variety to choose from.

While the usual motions soothed me further, allowing me to get lost in the process, my mind wandered back to our moment in the kitchen.

Even if Val was more withdrawn than usual, he didn’t reject my touch or the comfort I tried to provide, but it still wasn’t enough to completely put me at ease.

Beneath the stoic mask, it was obvious something deeper was bothering him, and I hated thinking about how that affected him beyond what I could see.

As much as I tried not to dwell on it, or the fact that he had been vague on purpose, I couldn’t stop my thoughts from wandering.

Not having every detail of his work shared with me was to be expected, but the thought of our life always being like that sucked out some of my enthusiasm.

I didn’t want to get used to him keeping me at arm’s length and not opening up to me, despite how it would likely help him feel better.

No part of me had wanted to be involved with anything related to his family’s business before, but something in me still wanted to be in the loop. Knowing we had a child on the way, and our futures were going to be intertwined for as long as possible, put more of that pressure on me.

If I was going to be his wife and the mother of his child, then I just wanted to be let in on the bare minimum—enough for me to be able to support him however I could.

The more I understood, the better I could be to him.

I didn’t want to be like Mom…who never asked. Never showed any interest in how my dad was doing.

As far as their relationship went, they were two people living under the same roof who also happened to be married with a child between them.

There was never any warmth from her. No tenderness, and certainly no support.

That coldness was hard enough for me to bear before, and I didn’t want to perpetuate that myself.

When the thoughts were harder for me to block out, I put my paintbrush down and placed a hand over the small swell of my belly.

Closing my eyes, I made a silent promise to the little one growing inside me that, regardless of what happened or what Val would let me in on, they would never know the disconnected upbringing I had.

Even with the work Val and his family did, even with the dangers that came with it, I wouldn’t subject our child to that same fate.

I still wasn’t fully accepting of the path he was on, but I knew I couldn’t change it.

I could only do my best to fulfill my promise to our baby and hope that his exploits wouldn’t drag us all down.