Page 40 of The Arrow and the Alder

S eph heaved, staring at him, and her heart felt as though it were going to pound its way right out of her chest. She didn’t understand why he had to leave—now? That had been the greatest kiss of her life, and she didn’t remember giving him any indication that she was finished. Quite the opposite, in fact. Honestly, she was a little surprised at herself.

“Why do you need to leave now ?” she asked.

He closed his eyes, dropped his forehead to hers, and brought her hands to his chest. His heart pounded as hard and fast as Seph’s own.

“Because I won’t be able to if I keep kissing you like this,” he said a little roughly.

Oh.

Oh .

She supposed…well, yes, that was where this would inevitably go, but it was all very new to her, and she was still in raptures from his kisses. She could have kissed him forever, and so she hadn’t thought that he was currently struggling with…well, the rest of it.

Alder leaned back and looked into her eyes as he gently pinched her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “I will not endanger you, either. Not again. I would never forgive myself.”

His statement confused her initially, but then he trailed his fingertips along the base of her throat. It still haunted him, what he’d done.

“You won’t, Alder. I trust you.”

“I don’t. And until it’s gone…if it ever…” He swallowed hard, and Seph wanted nothing more than to take the pain away from him. “I will not risk it with you.”

She studied him. “Do you feel it now?”

“A little. It’s like those embers.” He glanced aside at the fire. “It never fully dies, and it’s ignited by the smallest breeze.” His gaze traced her features and settled on her neck.

“I am not afraid,” she said.

“I’m terrified.” The gray in his eyes shifted as they met hers, and for a moment, Seph thought he was going to kiss her again.

She wanted him to. She wanted to lose herself in the feel of his lips and the taste of his mouth and the heat of him wrapped all around her. She wanted it so much her chest ached.

Alder closed his eyes tight and turned his head sharply away. “I need to go.”

Seph swallowed hard. “All right.”

Slowly, reluctantly, she stepped away from him. He strode to the small table, poured himself another glass of water, and drained it in one gulp. He stood there like that a moment with his back to her, silent and breathing deep.

“Will you be all right tonight?” she asked.

“I’ll manage,” he replied.

He turned back to face her and approached slowly, placing the softest kiss upon her brow, but before he could pull away, Seph grabbed his face and pulled his mouth firmly back to hers. She couldn’t help herself. Alder chuckled—undoubtedly because of her fervor—but then his laughter morphed into a groan, and when she finally released him, his answering smile was huge and brilliant and boyish and like nothing she’d ever seen before. She nearly pulled him right back to her.

Alder inhaled his resolve, though regret strained his features. “Get some rest. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said, then he walked away and left, smiling at her once more before he closed the door.

It was a long time before Seph found sleep. Her body was still flushed with Alder’s touch, and her mouth still ached from his kisses. Whenever she thought on it, which was always, her heart raced, and Seph found herself stunned by this abrupt shift in events.

Though if she were being honest, it wasn’t so abrupt. She’d felt a physical pull to him since the day they’d first met. She just hadn’t expected it to turn into…this. Whatever this was.

Josephine…my little arrow, so sharp and so true…I have fallen in love with you .

Her grandfather’s story about a prince who’d sacrificed immortality for love suddenly did not seem so silly anymore.

Except it wouldn’t be Seph who was sacrificing. It would be Alder, spending his days with a woman who would age and die while he remained young and vibrant.

Could she even ask that of him? Did she want to?

One hundred and twenty-three years! By the saints! That was so much life to live—how young she must seem in comparison, though Alder had never treated her as such. No, he treated her as…well, an equal.

This was the sort of relationship Seph would have wanted, when she’d entertained the idea of marriage, but she’d never dreamed—not even with Elias—that it could be so effortless or fulfilling.

Saints have mercy, Alder had only given her kisses and already she was thinking of marriage!

But he was the prince of Weald, and she an heir of Light, and therefore kisses were not such simple things. Which reminded her of how their conversation had begun, with him telling her that she needed to decide if she would take the mantle her great-grandmother had left behind.

If she would become Light’s new queen.

Seph thought of her family. If she did bring them here, technically Grandpa Jake would take his rightful place as king, but he wasn’t in any capacity to rule. Even if they managed to heal him, he was very old, so perhaps her papa would step into that role. He was next in line, after all, assuming he was alive. Regardless, she was still a princess…

It was all too much, honestly, and it made Seph dizzy thinking about it. She didn’t know the first thing about running a kingdom. She’d barely been able to protect her family, and yet even then, she was forced to admit those difficulties had arisen from the poor leadership of a greedy baron. How would they have fared under a just ruler? Was there such a person?

Could she be that person?

It is hard to live in two worlds, my Josephine. It will tear you apart…There will come a day, and very soon, when you will have to choose.

Seph picked up the little book that Alder had left, and she began reading through the stories, and it was to the stories so cherished by her grandfather that she eventually found sleep. Just like she always had when she was a little girl.