Page 14 of The Alpha’s Forced Omega (Alaska Alpha Wolves #1)

I’ve been restless these past few days, trying to find a balance between accepting my new living conditions and deciding what I’m supposed to do while I’m cooped up in Elias’s house.

He hasn’t been around that much, and I suspect that he’s been avoiding me ever since the day I dropped my guard and revealed to him that I don’t have any friends in the pack.

There’s a part of me that wishes I hadn’t become so vulnerable, but I couldn’t help it. In that moment, I’d become so overwhelmed by feeling cared for that I didn’t know how to react.

On the other hand, Elias keeps proving that he isn’t remotely interested in me like he was the night I was in heat. I can’t shake off the feeling that I’m being used, even after he assured me that he’d protect me now that I’m his mate.

I’ll have to keep my guard up, especially tonight, as I stare at the full moon illuminating the sky with its silver glow, shedding light on the significance of tonight.

A yearning for my grandmother seeps from one eye, and I have to fight the urge to let it all out and sob because I’m doing this all alone.

Ever since she died seven years ago, leaving behind an outcast teen to the hostility of this pack, I’ve had to do everything on my own.

From picking up duties in the pack cafeteria to navigating the dread of my delayed wolf and later realizing that the legends of the tribe’s witches were true, I’ve faced it all by myself.

Tonight, the weight of that ostracization hangs heavy on my shoulders, adding weight to the feather-light fabric of the white dress that covers my body. I glance down, raking my eyes from my fuller chest to my toes, and sigh.

In less than an hour, I will be bound to the Alpha of The Snehvolk Pack through a sacred ceremony under the full moon. My nerves are shot, my palms are sweaty as I wring my hands together and turn toward the full-length mirror in the corner.

As I stare into the doleful eyes reflected back to me, I try to find a semblance of hope just as the carillon bell outside the pack den is struck to signal the start of the fire.

The high-pitched chiming that follows bleats through my eardrums, joining the ringing of trepidation that was already present the moment I began dressing for tonight’s ceremony.

Feeling pathetic as I make my way out of Elias’s house, I keep my gaze pressed to the ground, following the blood-red carpet laid out across the snow in a path toward the field at the back of the den.

Unable to find the strength to face the pack members who will be present at the ceremony, I reach back to lift the built-in hood on my collar and cover my head.

Like a cloak that resembles the ones the alphas and elders wear for the sacred ceremonies, my dress was custom-made by one of the older she-wolves in the pack.

Just as shocked as she was when she was brought to the alpha’s house to take my measurements the other night, I can imagine that the others struggle to come to terms with this union.

It takes mustering up every ounce of courage I can find within myself to walk down the carpet and present myself to the Snehvolk Pack when all I want to do is creep into a cave and hide.

“Aurora…there you are…”

I’m greeted by Elias’s soft tone, a hand offered out to me. As soon as I look up and meet the glowing depths of his radiant honey-golden eyes, I sigh with relief.

But that relief is short-lived when I place my hand in his and become aware of the rest of the pack gathered around the fire. The placement of the mobile altar means we’ll have to walk between the pack members, and heat fills my cheeks as I try to keep my gaze lowered until we’re at the front.

I’m not sure if it’s the remnants of past horrors that have me hearing vile words like “fat pig” or “useless mutt” as we head through, but Elias doesn’t seem to notice as he leads me to the altar where his grandfather, Elder Silas, waits for us with the Snehvolk relic between his palms.

I try focusing all my attention on the hairless ivory skull of the pack’s ancestor—a werewolf named Boris. Though the pack history hasn’t interested me before, I realize that I’ll have to learn about it if I’m meant to be their luna.

Oh no…

There it comes again…

That dreadful feeling of overwhelm settles in the pit of my belly and churns my gut, heightening when Elder Silas begins the announcement that this ceremony is meant to bind Alpha Elias and me in a mate bond.

“By the light and grace of the Moon Goddess, we gather here today to witness the union of Alpha Elias McGruff to Omega Aurora Sinclair,” he continues as he looks around the field at all the werewolves gathered around.

The reminder that the others are present is a bitter taste that I can barely swallow, even when I gulp hard.

I might be breaking out in a sweat, but I’m too anxious to lift a hand to my brow to check. I want to remain as inconspicuous as possible, even if I can feel everyone’s eyes boring into my back while I’m standing beside Elias.

“Psst…Aurora…”

Elias’s hushed whisper almost falls on deaf ears while I’m trying to stay focused on ignoring the fact that the pack is gathered here to witness our union. I already know what they think of me; that’s why I flinch at the slightest sound that comes from behind.

The one that comes from beside me isn’t as horrifying as the others, but still, I’m too tense to meet his eyes.

It’s because of him that I’m in this mess in the first place. I hate being the center of attention at a gathering of werewolves who despise me. Huffing my irritation, my eyes remain fixed on Elder Silas as he proceeds to warm the skull over the fire before climbing back to the altar.

“Aurora,” Elias whispers again, this time with a gentle, nudging squeeze on my hand.

“What?” I grate coldly through the metal bars of my gritted teeth.

“Boris’s skull, huh?” he chuckles under his breath, discreetly so his grandfather doesn’t catch him. “You know that it’s only a myth that it holds any powers. I bet he’s not even resting in peace with part of his remains out here in the cold.”

Frowning, I look up to find Elias smirking coyly, his chest puffed out as if he’s proud of his dry joke. I shake my head and return to watching Elder Silas place the skull on a stake before holding it over the fire toward Elias and me.

Elias places one hand on the top of the skull and nods at me to do the same. It’s warm to the touch from being cast in the fire, and a small flicker of energy sparks beneath my palm.

“It’s as cold as the rest of his remains,” Elias whispers just as Elder Silas focuses measured eyes on him. He clears his throat and straightens up before his grandfather.

“Now, Alpha Elias, you may swear your oath to the Moon Goddess, and to the ancestors of this pack.”

Elias nods curtly, then turns to me, his eyes glowing with what I think is mischief.

“I know my jokes are as dry and cold as this skull,” he whispers. “But promise you won’t run away? I’d hate to have to chase you while carrying this horrid thing.”

He grimaces while staring at the skull, and it’s his expression that’s the funniest thing I’ve seen tonight. For a moment, I forget all about what we’re doing when his casual appearance makes him appear so human.

Snorting when I imagine him chasing me through the woods, wielding the stake, carrying the skull, I stifle the urge to burst into laughter. Elias’s eyes light up with a vibrance only owed to the stars twinkling in the night sky.

If he was trying to ease my tension, he succeeded, and it prompts him to continue with the ceremony.

“By the light and grace of the Moon Goddess, I, Alpha Elias McGruff of the Snehvolk Pack, accept Aurora Sinclair as my mate and luna of this pack.”

The twinkle in his eyes keeps me imprisoned but safe from the rancor of the pack, allowing me to repeat the words in response to his declaration, noting that he hadn’t used my rank. If he’s trying to use me, it’s not with the pack’s knowledge.

“I, Aurora Sinclair, accept you, Alpha Elias McGruff, as my alpha mate,” I respond, and the twinkle in Elias’s eyes grows even lighter now, and I’m able to see the tiniest emerald specks between the pools of hazel.

Awed by the beauty of his eyes, my mind empties, and my tension is eased enough to let my trepidations and wariness slip through my fingers. When the ceremony is completed and Elder Silas whispers something inaudible in Elias’s ears, he nods his agreement and then fixes his eyes on me.

The glint of mischief is still evident in his eyes, a coy smirk playing on his lips as he leans closer and whispers in my ear,

“What do you say we get out of here?”

“You wanna leave your pack?” I gasp, my eyes widening as I pull back to stare at him in disbelief. “During an important ceremony?”

He shrugs nonchalantly, his face contorting with a grimace. From this angle, I’m able to see just how sharp his jawline is, my finger tingling with a sudden desire to trace it.

“I am a married man now,” he teases, wiggling a brow. “Don’t you think I’d wanna skip all the formalities and go home with my luna?”

A fiery surge of awareness rushes through me and prompts my lips to part with a gasp. Elias only smirks as he turns back to the fire and whispers to his grandfather that we’re leaving.

I’m not sure if it’s Elias's wolf that compels him to want to hurry back home, or if his human side allows him to be thoughtful enough to lead me around the fire instead of taking me through the gathering of Snehvolk wolves.

Either way, the claws of anxiety come creeping over me as I follow Alpha Elias McGruff—my mate—back to his house.

Was that coy smirk and twinkle in his eyes a mischievous jest about what this means?

Our wedding night…

I can hardly contain my anxiety, gulping as I’m led into Alpha Elias’s house with the impending consummation of our mate bond hanging above me like a weighted cloud ready to burst and rain its storm on me.

What was I expecting, after all?

We just performed the mating ceremony in front of the pack, taking oaths that bond our celestial wolf beings. All that’s left is the consummation of that ritual that will cement our bond, with Elias marking me to lay his claim to my human body.

A shiver runs through me when it suddenly feels foreign to me.

I was adamant not to be tied down to the alpha, but it seems my moment of weakness and vulnerability the other day was my undoing.

He must believe that he can have his way with me, and dread seeps through the cracks of my already fragmented being as he passes the guest bedroom and leads me to his own.

This is happening…

And there’s no way out for me now—not with our wolves bonded as mates. I know my wolf won’t allow me to get far if I try to escape, even if it’s weaker and won’t come out from hiding when I need it to.

Even now, she remains quiet, only my body reacting to the anticipation of what this night will bring. My mind and body are at war, one wanting to flee while the other part wants the alpha more than anything.

I can feel that wanton need between my thighs, stifling the tingling sensations threatening to spread through my body and weaken my knees.

This can’t be happening.

Elias opens his bedroom door and steps aside, allowing me to enter for the first time and take in the neutral shades of his furnishings. Everything is as clean-cut as he is, austere as if he only uses the bedroom to sleep in.

I could spend all night dissecting his character based on his bedroom, and use it as a distraction, but Elias interrupts my thoughts when he clears his throat behind me. I stay frozen, squeezing my eyelids shut and bracing myself for impact.

“We don’t need to consummate the mate bond,” he says in a leveled tone, not giving away an ounce of what he feels about that.

I, on the other hand, feel a flicker of momentary disappointment.

So, we’re not having sex.

I should be relieved, but again, this proves that he isn’t attracted to me.

What does he want, then?

“We won’t do anything you don’t want to do,” he continues as he kicks off his shoes beside the door. “You can take the bed. I’ll take the sofa.”

Glancing at the sofa in the corner, I gulp, torn between my disappointment and utter relief that sex doesn’t have to be a performative act between us. Something in the air shifts, or maybe it’s just me.

But when he’s about to move past me, I reach out and tentatively brush my fingers across his arm to call his attention.

He looks down at his arm and frowns as if my touch scorched his flesh. When he looks up, he’s still wearing a frown, but there’s something earnest in his soft eyes that prompts me to drop my guard low enough for him to see right through me.

I know he can because I notice the look in his eyes that’s reminiscent of the look he had in them the morning he made me breakfast for the first time. The recollection of what that morning meant for me has me feeling the same way even now, and it’s almost as if I can trust him.

The golden pools with light traces of emerald specks have me spinning thoughtlessly, losing myself in their hypnotizing swirls.

“Y-you don’t need to take the sofa,” I stammer nervously, dropping my gaze just in case his eyes are enchanting me and I’m not thinking clearly. But even when I’m not gazing into his eyes, my decision remains the same.

Perhaps it’s because he’s showing me a side of himself that I’ve never seen before, but my guard is down right now. A staggered breath enters my chest, swelling it with a shudder, but it gives me the courage to say,

“We may have already performed the consummation, but you don’t have to give up your bed for me.” I nod toward the bed. “We could just sleep.”

Elias lets out a deep breath and then nods slowly. “We can do that.”

As my pulse races, I let Elias lead the way toward the bed, surprised when he removes his cloak and climbs in, then fluffs out the pillow beside him. He pats it and smiles at me, showing no sign that he has any plans to get intimate.

Not bodily, at least.

Phew!