Page 5

Ivy

For three days, I traversed rivers and streams until I was sure my scent couldn’t be detected.

I wandered through dense forest, careful to not cross into other pack territories.

I had always been fast, faster than my brother when we were in wolf form.

I was thankful now for my speed as it helped put distance between me and Darkwood.

Eventually, Rieka gave me back some degree of control.

With it came the unwelcomed flood of emotions over what Briggs did to us, over how he did it.

Where should I go now?

I couldn't return to Darkwood, to the judging eyes of my former packmates.

They looked at me like I was tainted. Unclean. Like I somehow deserved to be cast aside by my own mate.

No, not my mate. He tried to sever the bond because he didn’t want me.

I came upon a small cave tucked beside a burbling stream. Exhausted, I ducked inside, collapsing onto the cold stone in my human skin. The damp air was chilly but I welcomed the numbness.

I blamed the sobs wracking my body on my fatigue. Reality was sinking in that I had left the only home I’d ever know. Left Caleb and Emery. Left Jemma and Eric, Emery’s parents.

I was utterly alone.

"I hate you," I whispered brokenly, as though Briggs could hear me.

But even as the venomous words left my lips, I knew they were a lie. He chose Ruby and I chose to leave. I ran without thought.

Caleb and Emery must have been so upset with me. Would they hate me? Maybe when I was in a better mental state I would reach out to them. Beg their forgiveness.

The thought only made the heartbreak worse. I curled in on myself, arms wrapped tight around my knees, and let the misery overtake me.

My wolf whined pitifully inside me, already missing the comfort and security of the pack.

I squeezed my eyes shut. I’d rest tonight. And tomorrow, I’d figure out what to do.

The next few days blended together, a monotonous cycle of hunting and hiding. Rabbits and fish barely took the edge off my wolf’s hunger.

Rieka urged me to hunt larger prey but I lacked the strength and skill to do so alone. Large prey was always taken down in groups.

Desperation drove me to lurk near human campsites, watching and waiting for scraps. The indignity of it burned but I had no choice.

One evening, I slunk close to dying embers, drawn by the scent of charred meat. A discarded chicken leg, picked nearly clean. I snatched it up, tearing off the remaining flesh. Barely a mouthful but I savored every morsel.

Rieka huffed. This is not sustainable. We need real food.

I growled low in my throat. You think I don't know that?

Then do something about it , she snapped back.

Before we both starve to death.

Frustration simmered under my skin.

Arguing with my wolf would solve nothing.

Little did I know everything was about to change.

I awoke the next morning to find a freshly killed deer lying mere feet from my cave.

Steam still rose from its torn throat, blood staining the dewy grass crimson.

Shock jolted through me.

Who would leave this?

And why?

Rieka surged to the forefront of my mind, on guard.

A courting gift.

From a rogue.

I processed the implication.

A rogue wolf.

One trying to win my favor with food.

My gaze darted around the trees, searching for any sign of the hunter, but I saw nothing.

Unease prickled across my skin.

I knew I should reject the offering, move on immediately to discourage any further advances.

My empty belly clenched.

The rich aroma of fresh meat proved too tempting to resist.

Take some to go?

I checked with Rieka.

She radiated wary agreement as I quickly used my claws to field dress the carcass, slicing and removing thin cuts of venison.

I wrapped them in leaves, storing the bundles in my dress that I tied up like a sack.

They would feed me for days if I rationed carefully.

I could easily carry the sack around my neck in wolf form so I could travel swiftly.

Once finished, I wasted no time in leaving, loping through the forest until my refuge disappeared from view.

Days became weeks.

I moved from one temporary shelter to the next, never lingering long enough to draw attention from the packs whose territories I skirted.

Rieka remained vigilant, her senses attuned to the slightest hint of danger.

We're being watched , she warned one day.

From the shadows between the trees, a pair of glowing amber eyes met mine. A wolf stepped into view, his brown fur rippling with lean muscle.

The male shifted and I suddenly became very aware of our nudity. Typically shifters thought nothing of it but something about him set off warning bells.

"Easy there, pretty lady," he tried to soothe, his voice a rumble of silk and gravel. "I mean you no harm."

I bared my teeth in a warning snarl. "Then keep your distance."

He cocked his head, studying me with a mixture of curiosity and hunger. "You lost?”

I didn’t answer.

“No pack?” he tried.

I still didn’t reply.

“You must be lonely out here, a beautiful female like you all on your own."

"I prefer it that way." The lie tasted bitter on my tongue.

"Do you, now?" He took a step closer, his scent wafting over me—a heady musk of pine and wild things. "I could offer you protection. And maybe some companionship? All you have to do is submit."

I didn’t like the insinuation. "Not interested," I spat, echoing Rieka's furious growl.

The rogue's eyes flashed before he quickly masked it with a smile. "Pity. We could've had something special, you and I."

He lunged without warning, but I was faster, shifting as I pivoted on my heel and ran. My paws flew over the forest floor. The rogue's frustrated howl echoed in my wake, spurring me onward.

Too close , Rieka panted. We need to be more careful.

I couldn't argue with that.

As the months passed, I focused solely on survival. I grew lean and hard, my senses sharpening.

And yet, in the moments between the running and the hiding, my thoughts inevitably strayed to Darkwood. To Caleb and Emery.

I miss them , I confessed to Rieka one night, huddled in the shelter of an abandoned bear den.

I know. Her presence curled around me, offering what little comfort she could. But we can't go back. Not unless you’re prepared for what will happen if we do.

Assuming we could win, Rieka would kill Ruby and claim her place as Luna. She’d surely do her best to punish Briggs, but ultimately, she would bond with his wolf.

It wasn’t Onyx’s fault, after all. The blame lay with his human.

The temptation was there, always lingering in the recess of my mind. Occasionally, I'd find myself turning in the direction of Darkwood, my paws itching to carry me home.

But then I'd remember the look on Brigg's face, the triumphant gleam in Ruby's eyes.

No. I couldn't risk losing control and challenging Ruby for her place at Brigg's side. It made my stomach churn with revulsion.

And so I wandered, like a ghost in the wilderness, until I finally found a small patch of land where Rieka and I could be safe in the winter months.

This evening, as I patrolled what little borders I’d managed to maintain, the scent of a lone wolf—a real one, not a shifter—lingered in the air.

He’s close , Rieka growled. We can't let him take what's ours.

She was referring to a storage of food and supplies we’d either procured for ourselves or stolen from human campsites. We’d need it to survive the winter if we had trouble finding game.

It had taken months of stealth and close calls with local wildlife to carve out this meager existence, but it was all I had—all that stood between me and the yawning abyss of despair that threatened to swallow me whole.

The intruder burst through the bushes. I lunged forward to meet him, my jaws snapping as we collided. Blood filled my mouth, hot and coppery, as my teeth punctured flesh.

Don't let go , Rieka urged.

We fought like wild things, two lone wolves with nothing to lose. But in the end, it was my jaws that closed around the intruder's throat, my weight that pinned him to the ground until his struggles ceased.

I released my grip, stepping back to survey the damage. The other wolf lay still, his chest rising and falling with shallow breaths. I oddly had no desire to finish him off in his weakened state.

Probably left his pack to die alone in the woods, Rieka noted . I think he wanted us to help him along with that.

He was old, older than I realized when he attacked. His eyes opened and took me in.

I was struck stupid by the kindred feeling I felt for him.

As the adrenaline faded, exhaustion settled over me like a leaden cloak. I couldn't remember the last time I'd slept deeply, without fear of attack. Couldn't remember the last time I'd allowed myself to shift back into my human form, to feel the wind on my bare skin and the sun on my face.

We’re better protected when I’m in control , Rieka plainly stated.

It had been easy to lose myself in the simplicity of the hunt and the kill. But deep down, I knew the truth. Knew that with each passing day, I was losing my humanity more and more.

We're becoming what we need to become in order to survive. And we will survive, Ivy. We will not live the rest of our existence like this.

I just needed to make it through winter. After that, I could travel further away, maybe find a new pack.

You would have to tell a new Alpha that you’re from Darkwood.

My wolf was right, but I didn’t feel like arguing. We didn’t communicate the rest of the evening, even as we finished our patrol and returned to our den.

The sun dipped below the horizon, painting the sky in shades of crimson and gold. I lay at the mouth of the cave, watching the colors fade into twilight, my mind drifting to places I’d rather it not go.

I dreamt of an elderly female wolf with light brown fur and a white streak across her chest—an older twin to Rieka. She attacked an Alpha, not putting up much of a fight.

The female wolf’s lips curled into a wolfish-grin as her life slowly drained away from between the dark Alpha’s unforgiving jaws.