Page 4 of Tentacles for Christmas

At first, I was flustered after my embarrassing attempt to go into the café. Then I’d made a fool of myself, messing up my own name. When Cam asked what I liked, I didn’t realize they meant coffee. I’d only had cream and sugar in my coffee before that day.

Cam’s frozen salted caramel drink opened my eyes to what I’d been missing, and I’d been back almost every day since. They even made it hot, and it was just as delicious. I’d also learned Cam’s schedule, for reasons…No one made my drink as well as they did.

Talking to the small barista, with their thick curls, friendly smiles, and “they/them” pin, was the highlight of my days, and I didn’t know what to do with that fact.

New people weren’t common in Blue Lake, and I generally avoided all people if I could help it. We had tourists, though, and I would give boat tours or take people out fishing. With them, I gave a few grunts in reply to their questions and they left me alone.

Not Cam.

Cam asked me random things like my favorite color. To which I’d had to admit I was colorblind. I wore special lenses to tell the differences between colors a little better, but really I could see better than the average human. Most of my teachers had never bothered to learn that fact about me, but Cam did.

In truth, I was flustered by my attraction to the new barista. I’d never wanted to be around someone more, except my adopted father and Fowler King, who was like a brother to me until he left town.

Fowler came home a new man a decade later, and fell in love with his former best friend, Riley. They were wrapped up in each other, and I didn’t think they could relate to my lack of interest in sex or relationships.

Sure, I could ask either of them for advice, but I didn’t know where to start. My dad and Fowler were wolf shifters. Leaders of the King Pack, both a group of shifters and a motorcycle club. On paper, I was a member of both, and yet…I wasn’t a wolf shifter.

Retrieving the wrench, I decided to take a break and go for a swim anyway. The busy tourist season was over, and I needed time to think. To clear my head so I could focus.

The easiest way for me to shift was naked, and I also lost less clothes that way. Tossing my shirt and jeans beside my shoes on the doc, I folded my glasses and left them beside my phone on the dock.

Shipshape, my boat repair shop, was tucked into the hillside along Blue Lake and hid my houseboat from view. It also allowed me to skinny dip daily without pissing off the old busy-bodies in town.

Stepping off the wood and dropping into the water, it went from the warm side of cool to frigid as I sank to the bottom. I allowed myself to shift and touched seaweed with eight tentacles instead of two feet.

Darting off after some movement, I decided I wanted fish for lunch and let my instincts take over. My wolfy friends and family talked about their inner-animal as if it was a separate entity. Their wolf had its own thoughts and feelings.

Instead of two minds, when I shifted I had an extra brain in each arm and three hearts. I could control my limbs without thinking about it and regulate my pulse more effectively. And underwater, my vision was perfect.

Before the perch could escape me, I snagged the body with my suckers and paralyzed the fish before taking a few bites of sushi. Dropping the rest to be eaten by scavengers, I drifted back towards shore.

Shifting and hunting had taken my mind off Cam for a few minutes, but I was right back to thoughts of them with swimming taking no effort.

Thinking back to June, I remember admitting I was probably pansexual to Fowler over a bonfire. I’d researched sexuality, wanting to know if something was wrong with me, but I hadn’t come to any clear conclusions. Asexual fit how I lived. I only needed to get off occasionally, and never sought a sexual relationship.

But when I saw demi, I wondered if that was a better description. How would I know if I needed a stronger connection to be attracted if I’d never formed those bonds with anyone outside of family?

People of all genders could be visually appealing to me, but none made me want to kiss them or more. Even with Cam, I wanted to get to know them, but it wasn’t sexual.

It had only been a month of seeing them a few minutes at a time. Maybe I needed to spend time with them outside of Perk to know. What would you even call that?

Shifting back to pull myself out of the water, the answer came to me and I laughed out loud. The sound echoed off the rock face next to my shop and I shook my head.

What did you call wanting to spend time with someone outside of work, where you got to know them better and decided if you might want to kiss them?

Pretty sure that was a date.

Dating wasn’t something I had any knowledge about. Was I ready to go on a date? Maybe. But was I ready to ask Cam out? The answer was an unequivocalno.

For others, a month of seeing the cute barista almost every day might sound like an eternity. Fowler had mated with his partner after less than a week, though they had known each other for years before that.

To me, a month was barely scratching the surface.

No, I wasn’t ready for a date. But I wouldn’t stop visiting the coffee shop.

Patting my belly, where a layer of fat and hair covered my abs, I smirked to myself. Even if I had to hit the weights more often now I started having Cam’s sugary drinks and Eddy’s pastries. I couldn’t deny the pull. I would keep going back.

Chapter three