Page 44 of Tempting the President (Oro Nero MC)

Dear Ashton,

I’m coming to see you. I’m sorry it took so long.

Love, Your Big Sis

ARIA

“I’M SORRY...IT TOOK so...long... kiddo .” Slowly, I lowered myself to the ground and sat in front of his tombstone. It was a really pretty one, something I spent a good amount of my earnings for. The marble was a nice dark shade of blue, and the words engraved on it were gold.

The cutest little brother in the world sleeps here.

I started to cry.

“I miss you...so much, Ash. So...so much .” I pulled my knees up, hugging them close.

“I’m sorry,” I said shakily, “it took me...so long before...I could find the strength...to visit you .” I closed my eyes.

“I have so many...stories to share with... you . So...many. But the most...important—-” My voice broke, and I had to take several deep gulps of breath before I could continue.

“I met a boy...and he was almost...as cute as you .” I laughed and cried harder at the silliness of it. “He taught me...to smile again. He taught me...to love. To be...strong.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “Because of...him...I’m able to...come... here. ”

Just talking about Kellion hurt, and for a long time, I only stayed there, silent, alone in the moonlit darkness. I should have been scared, but I wasn’t. I felt like Ash was with me, and he was telling me I was the prettiest sister in the world, and never mind if Kellion Argyros didn’t love me.

Ah, God.

I started to cry again.

This was so yucky, me bursting into tears at the mere thought of his name, but even so, I couldn’t help it.

Innumerable minutes had passed when the hairs behind my neck started to stand, telling me that I was no longer alone.

Ash, darn it, if it’s you, please make sure you look like your cute self and not when you died.

I turned around slowly—-

And froze.

Kellion.

He stood a few feet away from me, his beautiful face pale beneath his tan, and breathing hard, like he had run all the way to get here.

It didn’t make sense. He shouldn’t have known I was here, shouldn’t have been able to read my mind. He couldn’t have, not when he didn’t love me—-

The thought had me asking brokenly, “How? How did you... know ?”

Kellion whitened even more at my words. “How...could you think I wouldn’t?” He shook his head, as if unable to believe I had even asked the question. “Aria, I love you—-”

My blood turned cold at his words, and I shook my head wildly. “No. You... don’t. ”

“Yes,” Kellion said savagely. “I do. I’ve always loved you. I was just too blind—-”

“NO!” I screamed the word, covering my ears with my hands.

But suddenly he was kneeling in front of me, tearing my hands from my ears. “Listen to me.” His voice was ravaged with pain, but I didn’t care. I was hurting, too.

I shook my head. “No.”

“Aria—-”

“NO!” I forced myself to look at him, and God, God, God, how it hurt to look at his eyes and know that all this time, he had never seen me. I had always seen him, and he had always seen someone else.

“I know...you can’t...” I struggled to get past the sobs so I could tell him why I knew, why he shouldn’t feel guilty. “When you were afraid... to be the President – I couldn’t stop making you... afraid. Remember?”

“You did,” Kellion said hoarsely. “You can ask Helios. That night, that was why I was so late in coming back. When you told me you thought I’d be a great President, I found the strength—-”

“ Liar,” I sobbed out. I hated, hated, hated the way he kept making me feel like there was something to hope for, that there was something to cling to. “If you loved... me, why couldn’t you say the words ?”

“I wanted to.” Kellion cupped my face with shaking hands, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. “I won’t lie to you, terataki. I didn’t know at first. You were my rebound—-”

I flinched.

Kellion looked sick. “I didn’t know it at first. I only knew I loved you when you learned about Jack from the phone call and you were in so much pain.

That time, I knew I would do anything for you, that I loved you so much.

I didn’t say the words then because I didn’t want to risk hurting you again and make you think I was saying them because I was guilty. ”

His voice became fierce, and his eyes captured mine, preventing me from looking away as he said, “ I love you. I planned to tell you tonight, when I was the President—-”

“No, no... stop it !”

But still he continued, shattering me over and over, “I wanted to say it in front of the entire club, so you’d know how damn proud I was to have you—-”

“STOP IT!”

His voice broke, and Kellion whispered, “I just wanted it to be special, baby. That’s all.”

I closed my eyes, unable to bear looking at him any longer. If I did, I would really start to believe, and for both our sakes, I couldn’t let it happen. “You already made... me...okay. So please...just be happy... with Jack. ”

“I love you.”

God. His insistence was driving me crazy with pain and longing, and with a sob, I tore free from his hold and struggled to my feet.

“Aria, I love you—-”

God, this biker. He was so damn stubborn. So damn nice.

“You don’t love... me. ”

“Yes, I do.” Again, he reached for me, and again I stepped away, out of his hold.

“You don’t love... me.” I closed my eyes. Did my best to close my heart. Because the next words I had to say would kill us both. When I opened my eyes, Kellion nearly took a step back, and I knew I had succeeded. My face was cold. Expressionless.

“Kellion—-”

He started to shake his head. “Whatever you have to fucking say—-”

A smart man, my biker.

It was just one of the many reasons why I fell for him, one of the many reasons why I needed to do this. It was the only way to make him leave and forget about me.

“When I came... here... when I saw... Ashton’s grave...I realized... I didn’t love you... either. ”

Kellion whitened. “What the fuck are you saying, baby?”

The endearment nearly broke me, but I held on to my blank mask. Happy, happy, I reminded myself hysterically. This was all so Kellion would be happy.

And so I forced more words out, each word a knife to stab his heart. “I think I... needed you. Not...love. Just...need.”

Kellion shook his head. “Stop saying shit—-”

“I don’t think...I ever... saw you... at all.”

Kellion jerked. When his gaze met mine, I nearly cried out at the pain in his eyes. Pain I alone had inflicted. I wanted to run to him, but I made myself stay still, to keep my blank mask on my face because it was the only way to force Kellion to let me go.

“Why?” he demanded hoarsely. “Why would you say that?”

“I don’t think...I ever saw you.”

Kellion stalked towards me, shaking my body as he choked out, “Stop saying that!” His gaze was wild and desperate as he looked into my eyes. “You promised,” he whispered. “Didn’t you promise you’d always see me?”

I had to close my own eyes. I couldn’t bear to see how I’d ruin him as I said, “I just... pretended... to see you... because you made me see.... Ashton in others—-”

“ No. ” But even as Kellion said the words, his arms had already fallen from my shoulders. “Take that back—-”

“I... can’t. ” I bowed my head, struggling for control.

“Then tell me what I have to do to make you see me.”

Ah, God. Why couldn’t he just give up?

I shook my head. “I’m sorry—-”

“Tell me,” Kellion repeated. “ Please. ”

My head shot up at the sound of that one last word, and that was when I realized just how good I was at pretending.

Oh God.

The world that had been so damn bright because of Kellion now started to blur again. Not just because my eyes were hazy with tears. The world was dark and evil again, but it was all because of me. Because of what I had done to Kellion.

His eyes were dull and lifeless, no longer the Kellion Argyros I knew. “I need you to see me, Aria.” His voice was painfully thin. “I don’t give a fuck if the whole world doesn’t know I exist but...I need you to see me.”

Suddenly, I remembered all the stories Helios shared with me. All Kellion’s most daring exploits on the race track, his daredevil stunts, even his wild gambles in the stock market.

His parents and Jack had taught him that he had to earn their love, had to do something just to be seen.

In front of me, Kellion’s body was taut with tension, as if he was only waiting for me to tell him to stop breathing in order to be seen.

“I can’t go back to before.” His laugh was hollow and dark.

“You changed my life so completely that there’s no going back.

So tell me, dammit. Tell me what I can do to make you see me. Please. ”

He was begging.

Because of me, my own doubts, my goddamn fears, he was begging.

Without realizing it, I had become exactly like his parents, demanding Kellion to take a risk for me – without willing to take a risk for him in return.

“Aria, please. ” The words were wrenched out of him as he fell to his knees.

I turned cold at the sight of it. Oh God, what had I made him do?

“If you have to keep pretending, then do it. I’m begging you.” His smile, oh God, his beautiful smile, was as dead as the rest of him, no longer reaching his eyes. “I just need you to see me—-”

With a sob, I threw myself at him.

His arms wrapped around me tightly even as we fell to the ground, Kellion kissing me through my tears.

I lifted myself up, needing him to see my eyes, to see the blank mask was gone from my face so he would know that I was telling the truth.

“I’m sorry.” Crying, I placed a kiss on his lips, and my tears fell faster. “I’m sorry.” I stroked his cheeks. “I see you.” I touched my eyes. “I see you.” I touched my heart. “Kellion Argyros, I’ll always see you.”