Page 9

Something you can’t have

M y driver insists on opening the door and gives me a questioning look as he helps me into the vehicle. But I’m grateful when he refrains from asking about Noah until he’s back in the driver’s seat.

“I take it the gentleman is all right.”

“Yes, the hospital released him an hour ago, but I can’t reach him on the phone. I’d like you to drop me off at his place, if that’s okay.”

“Of course.”

I lean forward to show him my phone with the map to Noah’s apartment.

“Got it,” he says, programming it into his GPS.

Bubbling over with relief, I chatter on and on about nothing the entire drive. But the moment we pull up to Noah’s apartment, I’m hit by the reality of what happened.

I almost lost him…

“It was my pleasure to be of service tonight, Miss Lane,” the driver tells me.

I nod and blindly search through my purse for a tip. I’m embarrassed when I only have a five-dollar bill to show for it. Holding it up lamely, I mutter, “This is all I have.”

“I’ve already been generously compensated for tonight,” he informs me, then says in a serious tone, “Please give the gentleman my regards.”

As I watch him walk around the limo to open my door, I’m filled with a profound sense of gratitude. “What’s your name?” I ask, taking his hand.

“Tanner.”

“I appreciate all your help tonight, Tanner.” My voice catches when I add, “Your kindness meant more than you know when I thought I might lose him…”

“I’m happy everything worked out. Take care, Miss Lane.”

“Drive safely.”

“I always do,” he chuckles.

I head into the old building without looking back, needing to see Noah. Grumbling impatiently for the creaky elevator to arrive, I bounce on the balls of my feet on the way up, wishing the old elevator would move faster.

Walking up to his door, I’m surprised when I find it unlocked. Opening it slowly, I take a cautious step inside. The apartment is dark except for the light streaming from his bedroom.

Realizing he must be resting, I quietly set my coat and purse down and head straight to the bedroom. With the door wide open, I breathe a sigh of relief when I see Noah lying there.

But I’m jolted with sympathy when I notice his right arm wrapped in a cast. Opening my mouth to announce that I’m here, I find my words stick in my throat when I hear a woman’s voice coming from inside the room.

“Are you sure I can’t get you anything else?”

I stop in my tracks, instantly recognizing her voice from hours of listening to her play online.

“There’s only one thing I need right now,” Noah answers, reaching out his hand to her. “I finally get to be with you in person. I never thought this day would arrive.”

My heart races when AngelEyes appears by his bedside. Unsure of what is happening, I remain silent as I watch them smile at each other.

“I was terrified when SkullCrusher told me about the crash.”

Noah shakes his head slowly. “I can’t believe you’re really here in the flesh…”

“You’re one lucky bastard, you know that? Only the great WheelWarrior could win a $75,000 prize and come out of a serious car accident with only a broken arm—all on the same night.”

She laughs flirtatiously. “You know…I could improve your lucky streak, hot stuff.”

He snorts. “How’s that?”

“By letting you get ‘lucky’ one more time.”

When Noah reaches to stroke her cheek, the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. Even then, my mind refuses to accept what’s happening. AngelEyes is a married woman and has a set of twins…I’ve seen pictures of the baby girls in chat!

Time slows to a crawl when I hear Noah answer her in a sexy tone, “You know what they say, three times a charm…”

Frozen in place, I gape at them as AngelEyes leans down and the two lock lips.

Bile rises in my throat when something he said during our fight a few days ago comes back to haunt me. “You were fine with how things were, but now…you want something you can’t have.”

At the time, I thought Noah was talking about the white dress, but he was talking about…wanting her .

My scalp tingles, and I start to feel dizzy. Afraid I might faint right there in the hallway, I turn to leave. Feeling dangerously unbalanced, I grab my things and walk out of his apartment, not bothering to close the door.

Smashing the elevator button several times, I have to lean against the wall to steady myself while I wait. As soon as I make it out of his building, I’m hit by the icy New York wind. My hands shake as I struggle to button up my shabby coat.

I have no idea how I’m going to get home! It’s impossible to get a ride on New Year’s Eve…

The sound of a car horn catches my attention. I glance across the street in grateful disbelief when I spot the limousine parked halfway down the block. Rolling down the window, Tanner shouts, “Stay there! I’ll come to you.”

I nod, continuing to shiver in the night air because I’m too stubborn to return to the protection of Noah’s apartment building after his betrayal. As soon as the limousine pulls up, I open the door and jump into the warm vehicle.

Through chattering teeth, I ask, “Why…di-did…you…st-stay?”

“I didn’t want to leave you stranded in case he wasn’t there.”

I look out the window, letting out a painful sigh. “He was there.”

Instead of embarrassing me with questions or unwanted sympathy, Tanner states, “I’m glad I stayed.”

“Me too,” I whisper.

Turning his head forward to face the road, he asks, “Would you like to return to the party?”

Going back to the hotel isn’t a possibility for me. “I want to go home.”

“Should I contact Miss Huntington on my return?”

“No. One of us deserves to have a good time tonight. I just…” My throat closes up, and I struggle to speak.

“Understood.”

Tanner turns on classical music as he drives to my apartment. I appreciate his thoughtfulness when the reality of Noah’s betrayal hits me in full force, and I start to sob. Until I saw Noah kissing another woman, I had no idea how deeply invested I was in our relationship.

I feel completely blindsided and betrayed.

Noah was the first to say “I love you,” and ever since that day, I’ve been imagining our future together. A possible marriage at some point. Maybe even a family…

The fact that he would cheat on me with one of his gaming buddies cuts like a knife. AngelEyes was the “mom” in the group, forever complaining that video games are her only escape from the twins’ spit-up and poopy diapers.

I feel so stupid…and incredibly hurt.

Noah, why did you do this to me? I scream in my head again and again.

The pain of his betrayal cuts me so deep, I feel myself shutting down. By the time the limousine pulls up to my apartment, I feel numb. When Tanner helps me out of the vehicle, he has to remind me to take my purse. “Would you like me to walk you up to your apartment, Miss Lane?”

I stare up at my building, shaking my head.

As I slowly make my way toward the entrance, he calls out, “Miss Lane.”

I sluggishly turn to face him.

“Call the number on Mr. Wallace’s business card if you need anything. He was sincere in his offer.”

“Okay…” I mutter, even though I’ll never have a reason to call it.

Looking back at my building, I see the lighted windows full of people celebrating the start of the New Year.

Just a few days ago, I thought this year would turn out to be the lamest New Year’s Eve of my life because I’d be celebrating it alone. I never imagined how utterly alone I would be.

Exhausted, I trudge up to my apartment. Once inside, I head straight to my bed and flop down on it, not even bothering to take off my coat or heels, even though my feet are throbbing.

I let out a muffled groan from the pillow when I hear Gwen’s ringtone coming from my coat pocket. Even though I desperately want to ignore it, I know she must be worried since she hasn’t heard anything.

Out of love for my friend, I dig the phone from my coat pocket and take a deep breath before answering. “Hey, G.”

“Where are you, Soph? You’re seriously missing out here!”

I hear the driving beat of energetic music in the background. Trying to keep my voice light, I tell her, “I had business to take care of with Noah.”

She slurs her words slightly when she grumbles, “I sure hope you dumped his sorry asss…”

“Something like that.”

Pleased by my answer, she declares, “Well, hot damn! I didn’t think you had it in you. Now, you have even more reason to par-tay! You’re on your way back, right?”

“No, I’m tapping out. I can’t bear to walk another step in these heels.”

“You want me to join you?”

“Of course not. I expect you to party for both of us.”

“You know I will!”

Hearing the crowd getting louder, I decide to end the call. “So, we’ll meet up and talk tomorrow.”

Giggling, she asks, “Do you mean today?”

Realizing it’s now past midnight, I repeat, “Let’s make it tomorrow.”

Gwen shouts joyfully, “Okay, Soph. I think I’m going to ride me a cowboy. Bye-eee!”

It helps knowing she’s celebrating the New Year in style—at least one of us deserves to.

I let out a pathetic moan as I force myself to sit up and take off the painful heels. With supreme effort, I unbutton my coat next, barely having the strength to toss it off the bed. Too exhausted to do anything else, I lie back down and flip the end of the comforter over my body. The moment I close my eyes, I gratefully succumb to the numbing darkness.

What seems like only moments later, I’m startled awake by someone banging loudly on my door. Still groggy from sleep, my brain immediately goes into fight mode.

Rolling out of bed, I pick up one of my silver heels lying on the floor and approach the door.

Ready to gouge Noah’s eyes out, I shout in rage, “Go away!”