Page 22 of Sun, Moon & Shadow (Fate of Aemoria #1)

Callan removed his own cloak and hung it on a hook beside the fireplace. He ran his hands roughly over his face as he sank onto the settee, slumping in the seat and focusing on the fire once again.

“When I was a youngling, all I wanted was to be like my father, the Noble Lord of Nivali,” he began.

“I trained eagerly, mastering combat with blades, growing stronger and more skilled with each passing year. But the older I got, the more I envied my father’s emissaries who were permitted to leave the territory and visit new and interesting lands.

“I must have asked a hundred times to be granted leave to travel with his envoys, but he always refused, saying I was bound to the land and needed to stay close. To be ready for when my time came to rule. Like many young folk, I felt trapped and decided I knew what was best. And so, I set out on my own without my parents’ approval, traveling across Aemoria.

I wrote them regularly but never sent word before I’d moved on, so they couldn’t track me.

“I was traveling in this way, cut off from the world, when Omen’s attacks began. No one could reach me when my father and mother were killed defending the village we passed earlier. Their bodies were never found.”

His voice had grown rough. Nova knelt on the floor, resting her shoulder against the empty cushion beside him. He avoided her eye as he continued.

“When I learned what had happened, I was mad with grief. At first, I refused to believe they were truly gone.” He paused, shaking his head ruefully.

“I didn’t return for the rite to honor my parents, or the ceremony to formally name my uncle as regent.

I spent decades seeking a chance at revenge, running from the truth.

Running from myself. The longer I stayed away, the harder it became to return. ”

Callan stood abruptly, walking to the hearth and hiding his face from her.

“Even now, after all this time, I can’t make myself do it.” His voice broke. “I’m a coward.”

Nova rose to stand directly behind him, laying a timid hand between his shoulders.

“That’s not true,” she said. “Grief is complicated. When my father died—” The memory of Anson’s unblinking eyes stunned her for an instant.

“I scarcely rose from my bed for nearly a year. I would have missed his rite if Agnes hadn’t bathed and dressed me herself.

If she hadn’t propped me up on her arm and kept me standing as they lit the pyre. ”

Nova spoke as if soothing a frightened animal. The same way Callan had spoken to her the night he upended her entire existence and revealed her Fae heritage. Callan turned to her, eyes on the floor.

“You are no coward, Callan.”

His gaze rose to meet hers, his dark eyes shining like river rocks, and Nova was certain no one had ever spoken those words to him before.

“Despite everything, you’ve kept your heart open. To Lady Estrid and Lord Rowan. Evander and Fawn. To me. You’re so much braver than I am.”

Nova’s heart thundered in her chest at the closeness of their bodies.

She took a shuddering breath and willed her hands to remain at her sides, but she found it was useless.

Surrendering to the urge she’d felt countless times before, Nova raised her hand to his face, tracing the edge of his jaw to his chin.

She felt his entire body tense under her fingertips.

Causing such a response in him, a beautifully brutal warrior, made her feel incredibly powerful.

Emboldened, she rose onto the balls of her feet and brushed a soft kiss against his lips.

Pulling back, she held her breath, pulse racing, as she awaited his response.

Callan’s chest rose and fell with several rapid breaths, his gaze fixed on her mouth.

The next instant, he crashed against her like a wave, his mouth claiming hers.

One arm circled around her, pulling her tight against his chest, his other hand cradling the back of her head.

Nova returned his kiss, matching his frenzied pace.

Though it had been years since she’d last been kissed, her lips quickly remembered how.

Gods above, it had never felt like this before.

Nova tangled her fingers in the soft strands of Callan’s hair as she opened her mouth to him. He slowed, regaining some measure of control, and angled her head to deepen the kiss, his tongue caressing hers. The sensation sent a tremor of desire between her thighs, and she moaned against his mouth.

An abrupt knock sounded on the door, and a servant entered carrying a tray of food and a pitcher. Callan spun away as the male crossed the room and set the tray on the table. Clearing his throat, Callan snatched up his cloak and threw it around his shoulders before trailing the servant to the door.

“You should eat,” he said, pausing in the open doorway, breath ragged. “I’ll shield the door. Only I will be able to enter unless you invite someone in. Don’t wait for me. I’m sure you’re tired.” He managed a hollow smile before he left.

Nova stared at the door for several moments after Callan was gone, her body acutely aware of his absence.

She brought her hand to her mouth, fingers lingering briefly on her swollen lips before she buried her face in her hands.

Kissing him had been impulsive. Reckless.

It violated a tenet she’d adopted years before, when her first lover abandoned her, leaving her heart battered and bleeding.

A belief solidified by the sudden death of her father by his own hand.

Everyone—even those who claim to love you—will leave you.

No. The kiss was a mistake, one that could never be repeated.

Nova ate quickly and swallowed a cup of sweet wine before stripping down to her shift and stockings and crawling under the furs layered on top of the plush feather bed.

As she lay there, listening to pops from the dry logs on the fire and waiting for sleep to come, she wondered where Callan had gone.

She hoped he’d rejoined his uncle in the hall, or that he was sharing a drink with an old friend.

But she knew him well enough to know he’d likely sought somewhere to be alone.

Her heart ached for him, but she understood the impulse.

After all, she was no stranger to self-imposed isolation.

The wine had warmed Nova from within, and a loud rap on the door roused her from her sleep before she even realized she’d closed her eyes.

Gray, early-morning light streamed in through the lightly frosted windowpane.

The fire had died down to coals, and she shivered in the chill room as the blankets slipped down to her waist when she sat up.

Callan wasn’t there. The only evidence he’d returned at some point in the night was an indentation on the pelt before the fire.

“Come in,” she called out, fairly certain an assassin wouldn’t have knocked.

A female servant with a slight frame and dirty blond hair entered balancing a tray in her hands. She made a slight curtsy before making her way to the table in the corner.

“Would you mind putting it on the bed instead?” Nova stretched her arms lazily toward the ceiling as the servant set the platter at the edge of the mattress. Nova tried to smile in thanks, but the female wouldn’t look at her.

“What’s your name?” Nova asked.

Not answering, the servant crossed to the fireplace, hurriedly stirring the embers and adding fresh logs to coax the fire back to life.

Her task complete, she took the tray from the night before and exited the room without ever looking Nova in the eyes.

Nova tried to distract herself with the fresh oatcakes spread with golden honey and sticky berry jam, but the exchange unsettled her.

Once she had eaten her meal, she pulled on her woolen dress from the day before and gathered her hair into a loose braid.

Draping her cloak around her shoulders, she left the room intent on visiting the stables.

The Estate was still asleep with only household staff and a few early risers moving about the Great Hall.

Nova bowed her head as she passed, but no one returned the gesture.

Most looked away as they rushed past her.

Nova breathed a sigh of relief when she finally stepped out into the quiet solitude of the frozen morning.

The sky was overcast, but the wind had died down since the night before.

Fat snowflakes swirled around her, carried on a gentle breeze.

She pulled her hood over her head and scanned the area to get her bearings.

Trudging through the snow to the rear of the main building, she followed the winding lanes connecting the smaller outbuildings and homes of the common Fae until she arrived at the stables.

The familiar scent of hay comforted her as she strolled down the long row of stalls, each one housing a magnificent creature.

Most were docile and friendly, reaching their velvety muzzles over the rails in search of scratches or a handful of feed.

One reared back, snorting and pawing at the floor as Nova approached its stall.

It was a mare, her shiny coat a deep charcoal, like a patch of cool shade.

Nova neared the gate, extending her hand as she murmured to the horse.

The mare resisted at first, releasing an agitated whinny and stomping her hooves, but she moved closer to the railing after a few moments.

Once the horse had calmed, Nova laid her hand flat on the side of the animal’s neck.

Slowly, the horse warmed to Nova, accepting pats along her graceful neck and scratches behind her ears.

“It seems you’ve made a friend.” Callan’s voice cut through the quiet, and Nova turned her head to find him standing in the archway. An intense flutter filled her chest at the sight of him, like the rapid beating of a hummingbird’s wings.

“You did say I could choose any horse from the stables.” She turned back to the mare and ran a hand along her smooth coat. “May I have her?”

“I’ll have to ask Thorn,” he replied, his voice close behind her. The crisp scent of him reached her, carried on the breeze. The horse snorted, drawing her head back behind the rail.

“Are you certain you want that one? She seems a bit ... aloof.”

“She’s misunderstood,” Nova tutted, holding out a handful of straw and laughing quietly to herself as the mare nibbled at it, lips tickling her palm. “She just needs a little patience and love.”

“I’m sorry I left last night.” Callan leaned against the rail, facing her.

“I agreed to accompany you on this journey, and then I abandoned you in a strange place.” He glanced around the barn, reluctant to meet her eye.

“Returning to Nivali has unearthed feelings I thought I’d buried long ago, but it’s no excuse. ”

“You don’t owe me an explanation, Callan. Though your apology is appreciated.”

“You shouldn’t be wandering about without me.” He shot an uneasy glance over his shoulder to the entrance.

Nova swallowed hard and cleared her throat, remembering how eager Thorn’s guards had been to spill her blood before anyone had even learned her name. She tamped down her fear and took a step back to survey the mare, wild and beautiful and perfect.

“I think I’ll call her Shade.”