Page 7

Bhodi

Rape and fucking murder.

Those words send a sickness through me, I’ve been arrested for raping and murdering the only woman I’ve ever loved. And when she was laying, dying alone in her apartment I was at work, I fucking chose work over her. I’ve spent years killing, but they were faceless people we came across, criminals who deserved to die and we were the only ones able to do it and now I’m being hauled in for the one thing I would never do.

I’ve been sitting in a dank cell for hours, receiving the occasional shit glares from other officers and detectives who pass by. I’m being treated like a fucking side show for their entertainment, all those who I’ve worked with for years are now silently judging and gossiping, their vicious rumours spreading through the precincts like wildfire.

Tonight, I was meant to take Summer to dinner, I promised to answer all the questions she had. I barely slept last night, I just watched her sleep, scared that it could be the last time I would have that peace. When I finally told her who I was, how for weeks I’d been the man in the mask, messing with her, tormenting her and watching her every chance I had. She pulled me close and gave me her soul. She didn’t pull away and run from me like I’d feared she would, instead she told me she loved me. In that moment, I felt something I hadn’t for a long time. I felt wanted, cared for, I felt the barbed wire around my soul loosen and the darkness hanging over my heart brighten ever such a little.

I knew she would ask me why, why did I do those things. Why did I push her away yet pull her so close. The truth is, I don’t know. For years I’ve been two people, but I don’t know at which point they merged and created this fucked-up person. Maybe I always was, and I’d never had any reason to question myself. The moment I saw her, I knew I needed her. I could use Two/Face to remain unknown, but then I had the opportunity to spend time with her as me and it terrified me, how beautiful, how innocent and how warm she was.

Even with her world falling around at her feet. Her dad being killed, the violent abuse she suffered and being alone. She never complained, never ran away from her problems. Instead, she embraced all of it and stayed strong throughout it all.

I knew I loved her, the moment I came to see her after killing that cunt Alex. I killed him because he tried to hurt her, and I never wanted her to be fearful again. The way her eyes roamed the blood stains on my clothes, there was no fear, only concern for me. The caring way she reached out and touched me, I can still feel her gentle fingertips even now. They’re imprinted on my skin, and I never want them to disappear.

The first time we fucked, it was raw, passionate, and fucking addictive. The moment I felt our bodies slide down the tiles of the shower and land on the floor, she gave me everything I didn’t know I needed. She gave me safety I’d never had, the love I’d never felt and an intensity I never knew was possible.

When the cage door finally slides open, Callaghan stands at the entrance, still unable to meet my eye. I look to him; however, he takes a couple steps back as Captain Dean approaches. The silence between the three of us is crippling, but I don’t say anything. I merely stand and await my next order.

“Come on, Grey, we need to interview you.”

I nod, slowly moving towards the door. I’m led towards the familiar interview rooms, but with the cuffs still tightly clasped around my wrists and the numerous whispers from colleagues, I know this is likely the last time I will be in this precinct. If by some miracle my name is cleared, the damage to my career is done, I could save the president himself and I’ll still be known as the cop accused of rape and murder.

Shit sticks.

And don’t I fucking know it.

The door opens and I drag my feet towards the empty chair. Placing my hands onto the table in front, I feel the chair rock back and forth a couple times, I can’t help but roll my eyes. Those tactics may work on petty thieves, but not on me. I know I’m innocent but proving it without exposing my secret life could be tough, then again, life is life. Whether it’s fifty years or three hundred and fifty years, I’ll never see the light of day again and the only contact I’ll have are those of the souls who wish to torment me and watch my further descent into chaos.

“Do you want a lawyer?”

Captain Dean asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

I look between him and Callaghan, before my eyes land onto the two-way mirror ahead of me. My cold, dead reflection looking back at me, void of any life. Shaking my head no in response, I sit back in the chair slightly, allowing them to go through the motions and how they’ve managed to come to this completely insane and fucked-up conclusion.

“Bhodi, are you sure you don’t want a lawyer?”

Callaghan leans in, his eyes full of concern but I just nod.

“I’m sure.”

I answer blankly.

Callaghan falls back into his chair, running a frustrated hand through his hair. He shoots a look to Captain Dean, who stands near the window, looking out towards the street below. Opening the files, he flips it to crime scene photographs and slides it to me. As soon as my eyes land on the burnt corpse, I immediately close the file and push it away. I feel my stomach begin to roll and the bile begins to rise in my throat.

“You know why you’re here, Bhodi, just tell us what happened.”

Callaghan speaks quietly, almost mumbling as he begins to shift uncomfortably in his chair.

My teeth clench on the inside of my cheek, whilst my eyes travel the table in front of me and eventually land on Callaghan. He shrinks into his chair slightly, my cold gaze holding his momentarily before he backs off and looks away.

“You’re the ones with the arrest warrant, you apparently have the evidence. You tell me what happened.”

I throw in a dismissive tone.

“Fuck sake.”

The captain mutters, before slamming his fists down onto the table in front of me. The files fly off and Callaghan all but shits himself. “I don’t have time for your arrogant fucking attitude, Bhodi, do you have any fucking idea the charges you’re facing? Rape! Rape and murder and you’re still walking around this place like cock of the walk.”

The veins in his temple are bulging, his skin has turned a deep shade of maroon, and his hands are trembling. Yet, I can’t seem to bring myself to say anything. This man was a mentor to me and last night came to my home with officers to arrest me. I owe him shit. He’s already made up his mind that I’m guilty, whatever evidence he has must be good, or whoever wants to frame me is dedicated to their cause.

“I loved her.”

I feel my voice crack, I look up towards the captain. I see his anger falter for a moment.

“What?”

“You heard me, captain.”

His shoulders sag and he runs his hand gently across his chin. I can see his mind trying to process my statement. His eyes meet Callaghan’s, before he pulls the chair out and takes a seat. I swallow hard. Sitting back in the chair, I feel it rock back and forth. I look across the table and feel the distance between them and me growing. I knew when the shit hit the fan Jimmy, Axe and I would be on our own, but when you’re amongst the carnage, you rarely look to your tomorrow.

I finally have to and it’s fucking bleak.