Page 19 of Such a Sweet Omega (His Alpha Desires #5)

Jabez

My wolf had wanted him closer to us from the first day, insisting he belonged in our den, but I had still been stuck in the idea that I would never want another omega in my life, that I did not deserve someone.

Treating myself like a child who is the reason a family cannot have nice things.

Overall, if I wanted to make a good life with my omega, I was going to have to forgive myself for the past, accept what my mentor and others close to me insisted, and recognize that there was nothing I could have done to save him.

And if I was going to treat my omega as my partner, I needed to show him the respect he deserved. I absolutely should have shared more about my past before we mated, but he had not wanted that, and he did know that I was widowed.

But we’d come so close now and I wanted him under my roof. I needed to be sure we could be completely open with one another. I could not survive otherwise.

So, I invited him over for dinner, hoping to clear the air of the few things that I felt needed to be said. I knew many shifters, once they met their fated, would just leap, and we kind of had done that, but as a widower, I was carrying some baggage. Even in forgiving myself, that experience had affected me and my world view.

“This is great. I never would have barbecued so early in the year, but the weather is perfect, isn’t it?” Beale was sitting on a lounge chair on my patio, looking so relaxed and at home, my wolf had never been happier.

“I always enjoy grilling.” I flipped the steaks and came to sit in the chair next to his. “Did you have a good day?”

“Not bad.” He grinned. “I got a big tip for remembering the twenty things that went into this guy’s latte.”

“Was it really twenty?” My mind reeled, trying to think of what twenty things could fit in one cup of coffee. “Or just a lot.”

“Twenty.” He shook his head. “Although a few of them were literally a drop or two because it is not a gallon jar.”

“Oh, that’s so funny. You deserved that tip.”

We talked a little more about our days. I’d had a patient who hadn’t been expected to do well make a turn for the better, and I was glad to share that before we settled in with our plates and the sunset.

“I told you I was a widower, but I did not say that I lost him and a child at the same time. He died giving birth.”

“Oh, alpha.” Beale set his fork down and reached for my hand. “That must have been so hard. Just a mate is enough but a child as well?”

“He had been hiding a secret from me.” I swallowed. It was so difficult to talk about even all these years later. But I had to be vulnerable and show my mate where I was coming from. In fairness. “He had a rare condition that meant pregnancy was not only dangerous but likely fatal. And he never told me. I wanted children, but we could have adopted or just enjoyed nieces and nephews. Whatever. I really took the blame for not knowing.”

“How could you know? He didn’t tell you.”

“No, he didn’t and that is why I want you to know. I want us to be honest and transparent with one another. No secrets, no lies, not even of omission.”

“I promise to do my best,” he said solemnly. “And I admire the strong person you are after such a heartbreaking experience.

He could have complained that I had waited to tell him, although I had tried once before. I could have tried harder and not done it when we were both so ready to tear one another’s clothes off.

“I promise, too,” I told him. “And if you move in here, we’ll have lots of time to be transparent with one another.”

“Right.” He picked up his fork again and let it drop again. “Wait. What did you say?”

“I asked if you’d move in?”

Silverware clattered to the deck as he launched himself at me. I held my plate out of the way and caught him with the other arm. “Is that a yes?”

“Of course. I was just so surprised.”

“Omega mine, you’re my mate. Where else would you live but in my den?”

We spent the rest of the evening making plans. His lease would be up in a month, and I didn’t see any reason why he should stay there just because he had to pay one month. Why wait? I was very happy and very in love.