Page 12 of Steel and Ice

BLAIR

Mud held my knees in place despite my attempts at resistance. Colt’s hand covered my mouth, firm and strong.

This is not where I should be.

Physically. Morally.

Ethically.

I couldn’t be here.

The graveyard went on in long ribs of stone and hedges. But my entire world was six inches of Colt’s palm over my lips and cold slab at my spine.

Darkness folded in, a heavy cloth drawn over us.

“Quiet,” Colt said against my ear.

My mouth involuntarily answered with a sound I hadn’t intended to make. His hand swallowed it before the silent night could catch it. The calloused pad of Colt’s thumb dragged against my lower lip. It tasted of clean soap and cold air.

The weight of his body took the wind from my lungs and pressed warmth against my chest.

Travis’s shadow lurked, moving between stones. His shoulders tipped, his chin high.

He had the silhouette of someone who expected everything to move for him. To get out of his way.

Iron fences lined the far edge of the cemetery, stretched into the shape of a stitched mouth. Angels stood over the rows of graves with their faces darkened by the late hour. The endless graveyard should have felt open under the wide Chicago sky, but instead it felt claustrophobic.

Travis drifted along the row with the attention of someone hunting for a story to boast about to his drinking buddies later.

Colt leaned over me until we were one outline as wind whipped past us.

His chest rose under my mouth, his breath count measured. As if he was holding onto a wild animal that needed to run.

My body picked an unfortunate time to ignore ethics entirely. Warmth pooled inside me. Low, and refusing negotiation.

I didn’t move and tried to be made of knees and cooperation.

It should not have helped. But it helped anyway.

My cock thickened against the seam of my jeans and continued to push, hard in a place with no room for it. Denim bit and I shifted slightly to try and hide it, which nudged me further into Colt.

He firmly placed two fingers at my jaw and angled my face to point exactly where he wanted it. Not tough, not cruel.

But certain.

His thumb sat under my throat, and I could feel my pulse pound against it. My cock pushed harder into the fabric as if it were able to make space for itself. I should have been appalled.

I wasn’t.

I didn’t move while Colt caged me, letting the need burn even though it had nowhere to go.

Each inhale slid me the smallest amount along his body.

The rub made it worse in the right way.

A single rain drop fell from a clipped wing and hit the stone near my ear. Loud because everything else was quiet.

Travis paused at our row, and the silence grew sharp teeth.

Colt didn’t move an inch, and I didn’t flinch. His pulse grazed my lower lip and stayed there.

Not frantic. Not calm. But the narrow middle ground men can only keep by sheer force.

Travis’s boots rasped again and turned away. His outline thinned as fog devoured him. The sound of his footsteps dragged on for an extra minute but eventually flattened out with the rest of Chicago’s noise.

Colt kept his palm where it had been for several beats after quiet returned.

He didn’t trust it, and neither did I.

When he finally removed his hand, the air hit my lips, cold.

Colt gazed down at me. “Are you hurt?”

“No,” I said as my voice cracked from not speaking. “I’m fine.”

He closed his other hand around my forearm and pulled me up to my feet. Harder than necessary.

Colt grimaced but showed no emotion. “You’re not safe here. You shouldn’t be here alone.”

My eyes widened. “You shouldn’t be here at all.”

I let it sink in for a moment.

Colt looked off toward the path Travis had taken. A decision moved across his face like a storm sliding over a flat lake.

I needed some space, some air that belonged to me.

“Give me room,” I said with an exhale.

Colt stepped back at once and empty space slid into place where he’d been.

“Another step,” I said.

He took it and opened his hands, palms bare. Fingers loose. The night felt only slightly less sharp with nothing concealed.

Colt’s eyes met mine. “Tell me to leave.”

“I should,” I said.

And I meant it.

“Say it,” he replied, “and I’ll go.”

The word go hung behind my teeth but refused to jump.

Relief and embarrassment intertwined and pretended to be the same damn thing.

“No,” I said.

Colt nodded, but there was no triumph in it. “Then I’ll stay until you change your mind.”

My nostrils flared as I looked him up and down. “Stay where I can see you.”

He gestured in front of him and held a line as if I’d drawn a real one. “I’ll stay here.”

Hedges leaned in, edging us further into darkness.

“Your knees,” Colt said as he pointed at them. “They’ll bruise.”

I glanced down and realized he was right. Adrenaline caused me not to notice, but as if on cue, a new pain throbbed and radiated through my legs.

Colt took in a deep breath. “I can carry you to the path.”

“No,” I said, and shook my head. I didn’t want to owe Colt anything other than my balance at the moment. “Just… offer me an arm.”

But Colt didn’t take my hands. Instead, he offered me his forearm and let me choose where to grip. I took what I needed, not an inch more. The ground mercifully allowed me to stand with no sway, which I took as a good sign.

“I want to touch you,” Colt said, surprising me.

Quiet and unforced.

He added, “Not there.”

“You already did,” I said before I could stop myself.

It sounded as much a confession as warning.

“Where?” Colt asked.

The word echoed through the air around us. I looked around, checking to be sure Travis hadn’t returned.

He hadn’t.

“Wrist,” I said, nodding at it.

Colt turned my wrist and set his thumb over my pulse. Just enough pressure to feel it.

One measured intake, followed by another. He let go at exactly the second I exhaled. As if he’d been waiting for the release.

And only that.

Colt kept his eyes locked on mine before looking down at my mouth.

“Don’t follow Travis home,” I said, more plea than statement.

Colt didn’t lie. “Go home,” he said, “and lock your door.”

“The back latch is always broken,” I answered, evidently advertising my house’s flaws. “I’m fixing it tomorrow, but I couldn’t find the right screws at the hardware?—”

Colt interrupted me. “I’ll repair it for you tomorrow.”

The thought of Colt anywhere near my home sent a shiver down my spine.

Although I wasn’t sure if it was the first time.

“I put up a doorbell camera today,” I added.

I hoped the admission would make me sound capable. Colt’s gaze went to the street before returning to me.

“Good,” he said, “let it watch.”

I took a quick breath. “You don’t cross my threshold,” I said, “unless I invite you.”

I desperately hoped he hadn’t heard the slight shake in my voice.

“I hear you,” he said, and lifted his open hands again. “I’m walking you home. But I’ll stay where you can see me, and if he shows up, I’ll keep my hands like this.”

I paused before answering and he filled the void.

“If he doesn’t show up,” Colt added, “I’ll see you to your door anyway.”

I looked down at the wet ground and back up at Colt. “You don’t have to do that.”

“I will,” he said, as if it were settled.

Water trickled off the stones around us in thin lines. I took another deep breath and steadied myself on the stone before I slowly stepped toward the iron gates. Somewhere behind me, Colt’s pace almost matched mine.

Steady. Quiet. Close enough I could count his steps.

The path wound and dipped as I tried not to read names on the graves we passed.

Maybe Travis was really gone. Or maybe he’d never been more than a shadow in my mind; a figment of my imagination. The result of too much time spent leading anger management courses.

But I had a good idea where Colt would be when my latch pretended to catch.

The cemetery gate finally came into view and showed its old teeth as we slipped through.

If danger came tonight, it would meet me with open hands.