Page 20

The tight straps on my wrists and the impending water below made my heart race. Gun shots rang as my body was pulled closer to the water. I tried to hold my breath, but it seemed to do nothing for the pressure that felt as if it was breaking my bones. Soon, water invaded my lungs.

I inhaled deeply as I jerked awake. I looked around my frilly pink childhood bedroom. Since that day, I’d been staying at my parents’ place. Knox had gone completely silent—cutting off all contact. According to him, he had to make sure he didn’t bring anymore danger into my life. I stayed put, wanting to be somewhere he could find me when he was ready, but I couldn’t put my life on hold forever. It was something I told myself regularly, but my heart wasn’t hearing it.

I pulled the covers back and got dressed. I took a seat at the edge of my bed and a knock sounded at the door. I knew it was my parents. Since I had been back, they had been checking on me every chance they got. Same with Jim and Chyna. They had been calling at least twice a day for the last month. I felt smothered, although I knew it was all out of love and a little frustration that it wasn’t the person or man I wanted it to be calling me.

“Come in,” I yelled as I stood to grab my suitcase and duffle bags.

My parents walked in and stopped at the door.

“Is everything alright? We heard you screaming again,” my mother asked.

I nodded and continued to move from the closet to my bed.

“Honey, why are you packing this early?” my dad asked.

I finally stopped and turned to face them. I knew they could see the heavy bags that had made themselves at home beneath my eyes. “I have to get back to my life and sleeping at my parent’s house will not achieve that. My magazine needs me and so does my house with all the amenities that I adore. I have to go.”

They stood quietly, waiting for any sign that I would back down, but they would be wrong. I needed to get back to myself. The whole point of taking that trip was to find me and not depend on anyone else. Granted, things got a little bumpy at the end with me being kidnapped, then saved, but kidnapped again, only to be saved once more. I was exhausted and thinking maybe Knox had the right idea by leaving me alone.

“We understand and appreciate you staying for as long as you did. Do you need us to send security to your house to watch it?” my dad asked.

I didn’t respond quickly. I wanted to truly think about my decision. “No, I’ll keep my gun handy. Thank you, though.”

My parents didn’t say another word as they turned to leave the room. They allowed me the time I needed to pack my things, and by the time I made it downstairs, they were waiting for me by the door. We hugged and said our goodbyes as I left my parent’s estate for the first time in weeks.

Dawn was barely breaking as I approached my car. After my parents brought me to pick up some belongings and my vehicle from my house, I found myself checking the backseat—a new paranoid habit I’d developed. Only after confirming it was empty did I feel safe enough to drive home.

I pulled into my garage and waited a moment in my car. I didn’t know why it felt so odd to be back here. It wasn’t like anyone had broken into my place.

I exhaled, then grabbed my things from the backseat before heading inside. If I was being honest with myself, I missed being back home. I placed my bags on the side of my island and walked further into my kitchen to grab the bottle of wine I had tucked away. I needed a sip to commemorate the fact that I finally had the courage to come back home.

I walked over to the cabinet to pull down a wineglass, then poured my wine when my phone rang. I quickly placed the bottle on the counter and walked over to my purse to grab it before the call went to my voicemail. Chyna’s name appeared on the screen, so I answered.

“Hey, girl, I’m just calling to do my usual check in.”

I shook my head, and I placed the call on speaker so I could set my phone on the counter.

“Yeah, I figured. You busy today?” I asked.

I could hear her slightly whispering to Ryan, I was sure to make sure he didn’t have any plans for them tonight before responding.

“Nope, all free.”

“I’m back home. You want to have a movie day and drink wine?” I asked.

“You aren’t inviting Jim?” she asked.

“Is that a tinge of jealousy I hear? But no, not tonight. I’m sure he is out having a ball tonight, unlike us. Not to mention, it’s been a while since we’ve actually hung out just the two of us.”

“You’re right about that. I’m on the way and don’t drink all the wine. I can already tell you’ve started without me.”

I laughed as we ended the call. I drank the bit of wine I already poured into my glass, then grabbed my bags that I placed beside the island to head for my room so I could get cleaned up before Chyna got here. About thirty minutes later, the doorbell sounded.

I had tied my hair up into a bun and put on my favorite pajamas. I had also done us the courtesy of picking out a movie, our favorite, BAPS . I jogged over to the door and checked through the peephole before pulling the door open. Chyna had on pajamas as well, as she awkwardly leaned in to give me a hug. It had been that way since I’d been back.

I knew it had a lot to do with how I blew up on her when I was in Fiji. It didn’t help our relationship that soon after, I was kidnapped. I knew there were a lot of unspoken words that needed to be said between us.

I stepped aside so she could walk in and put her things down.

“I stopped by the grocery store to get two more bottles of wine and a couple bags of chips. I figured we would need it, and I know you haven’t been back home in a while to restock anything.”

“Thanks and yeah, I need to go grocery shopping one of these days. Almost everything in my cabinets are spoiled or no good. I have two wine glasses already out and popcorn. Let’s head to the living room.”

I pointed toward the couch, and Chyna followed. Once we were both comfortable, I handed her a glass of wine, and then started the movie. We laughed and sipped our wine in silence. The tension was so thick, and I could tell there was so much she had been holding back on saying since I was at my parents, so I grabbed the remote and paused the movie.

“As much as we love this movie, I can tell neither of us for the first time is into it. So, let’s do it. Let’s get it all out there in the open with no hard feelings. I am not fragile or broken, so say what you’ve been wanting to say.”

Chyna took another sip of her wine, then nodded before placing her glass on the coffee table. She tucked her feet beneath her and turned to face me fully. I could see the conflicted emotions crossing her face. I waited patiently because I knew there were things I needed to get off my chest as well.

“I was mad at you when you got kidnapped. I feel guilty as hell about even saying that aloud. I was mad that you went to Fiji and got careless. You’re my only friend that I can trust with everything. I know that anger was out of fear because I love you, Skye, and I never meant to make you feel you didn’t matter or like you were incapable of deciding for your life. Clearly, you weren’t too off with your choice. I hear that man went to all lengths to get you back,” she said.

I knew she was angry with me. I saw remnants of it in her eyes every time she spoke to me when she visited me, but I was angry with her too.

“I get that. I was angry with you, too, for moving on without me, the worst thing a friend can feel for another. I’m happy that you’ve found the man you will spend the rest of your life with, but it hurt that I would now become a third or fourth thought to you, too. I depended on you in ways you weren’t responsible for. I was so clouded by my loneliness and resentment that I took that anger out on you. Granted, you caught me off guard when I was in Fiji. I could have told you how I felt in another way. I apologize for that.”

Tears rolled down our faces as we revealed our deepest secrets to eachother.

“A part of me knew you felt forgotten, and that lunch didn’t make it any better. I could have handled that a lot better. I promised things wouldn’t change because I knew how much you needed me, but that was a promise I shouldn’t have made when I am supposed to be putting my fiance and future husband first,” she told me.

I knew she was right, which was why I felt so guilty for being mad at her, but I couldn’t help those feelings that told me at every turn that I didn’t matter anymore. I nodded, so she knew I heard what she was saying.

“I did feel that way, but not anymore. Not after experiencing all I’ve gone through. Shoot, not after feeling so deeply for a man, and I had only known him for a short period of time. I can only imagine what you would do for a man you’ve had time to register your feelings for.”

Chyna smiled and opened her arms wide as the tension that was once suffocating had now dissipated. Without a second thought, I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around her. We hugged for what seemed like forever, but it was needed. We needed to create clear boundaries and expectations for our friendship.

“I’m glad we got that out of the way. Now I can breathe when I ask you what was it like to fuck an assassin, girl?” she asked while picking up her wineglass again.

I couldn’t contain my smile even if I tried. My pussy thumped at the thought of that man touching me. I didn’t know how good words would do to describe what it was really like.

“That good?” she asked. I nodded with a tight-lipped smile. “Well, damn, I might need to convince Ryan to take up a new profession. I mean, my man handles business, but if it got you speechless, that’s a different type of dick.”

We burst into laughter as I turned the movie back on. Knox was on my mind heavy, thanks to Chyna. I was just starting to let it go that it might be for the best he hadn’t returned, and now I was sure my ass was going to be dreaming about him tonight. Although that was better than dreaming about the other thing.

“Hey, where did you just go? You alright?” she asked.

I smiled and waved her off. “Girl, I’m fine. Ignore me.”

I could tell she wanted to say more, but she left it alone, and we continued to enjoy the movie and a few others since we still had the day to waste away. We had so much to catch up on that we hung out the entire day. That was until we both fell asleep and Ryan called Chyna to see when she would come home. I guess he figured he had loaned her to me for the day, but the night was all his.

I walked Chyna to the door and gave her a hug. I pulled the door open, and the man who had been plaguing my dreams stood ready to knock. He dropped his arms to his sides as he nodded at Chyna, who was smiling too big.

“Knox, this is my best friend, Chyna,” I introduced her.

He cleared his throat, and then hesitantly reached a hand out to shake hers. Chyna gladly obliged and then stepped out to stand beside him.

“It’s nice to meet you. I’ll talk to you later, Skye.”

She walked further down the walkway and pretended like she was going to faint dramatically. I couldn’t help but roll my eyes, not to mention I wasn’t supposed to be so damn happy to see him. I was supposed to be upset, so I steeled my features and crossed my arms against my chest.

“Can I help you with something?” I asked.

For the first time since we were alone, he smirked and then stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I know you aren’t happy with me, but allow me to explain, and if you don’t think it’s good enough, I’ll go and never return.”

I couldn’t deny the fact that I wanted to know where he had been and why he came back now. I stepped aside so he could walk into the house and locked the door behind him.

I walked into the kitchen, and he followed me. I could feel his eyes practically burning a hole into my back as I grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge, then placed them on the counter. “Talk.”

He nodded and pulled out a chair at my island to take a seat.

“After returning you to your parents, we still had our own mess to clean up. Vlad had framed us for her crimes, and we needed proof of our innocence. That day in the playroom—the day everything went down—we managed to record her confession. What I didn’t know was that VC had also tapped into their security cameras, capturing everything. He sent that footage to the authorities, but they took their sweet time verifying it all. That’s what caused the delay.”

He paused, his voice softening. “But beyond all that, Skye, I have nothing to offer you. Hell, I haven’t even taken you on a proper date where I could use my real name. You deserve better than that, and for a while, I convinced myself I couldn’t be that person for you.”

My arms fell to my side as I walked around the island, and he turned his chair to face me.

“But now?” I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders and reached up to brush a curl that had fallen from my bun behind my ear. “I figured we would just have to work this shit out. There is no other woman for me and I don’t want anyone else. I just want to be wherever you are. Even if we’re broken, we can be broken together. You’re worth me staying for more than just a while. If you will let me, I would like to court you the right way. I bought a condo in my name. Man, did that feel weird, but I did it. I just want to take you out as Knox Bolden. Can I do that?” he asked.

I didn’t even realize I was crying until he reached up to wipe a few tears from my cheeks.

“I would love that, and oh, just in case you wanted to know, I like red roses, and the next time you try to run off on me, best believe I’m going with you,” I responded.

He laughed, and a light entered his eyes, one that I would do anything to continue to experience. I reached up and placed my hands on both sides of his face as he leaned forward to kiss me. His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me against his chest, while one hand reached down to grab my ass, causing me to giggle.

“Oh, you’re so mannish.” I laughed.

“You better know it.”