Page 26

Nic

My legs are like jelly by the time I step out of the corporate negotiations lab.

Three hours. Three hours of standing under blinding lights and getting grilled by a panel of mock business owners was the last thing I needed, on top of the punishment I took last night.

Walking is already hell, but the ache between my thighs? It’s so much worse.

And I meant what I said to Kai. I’d give anything to feel his tongue working me over right now.

It’ll be torture to have to wait until tonight. I really, really need his mouth on me. And God, a full-body massage. I shiver at the thought.

Kai gives the most incredible massages. Strong hands, perfect pressure . . . I should fake muscle aches more.

I glance at my watch. Shit. I’m running late for the school run, now that I’ve got my full class—and then some back.

I force my legs into a quicker pace and head to the parking lot.

“Nic!”

I turn to see Barry jogging toward me, waving a glossy brown package.

“Hey, what’s that?” I ask, eyeing the package as he slows to a casual stroll, grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“Lurve mail,” he announces, handing it over. “I was picking up some papers from the department, and the admin lady dumped this on me. Figured it’s from Prof. Zaddy.”

I ignore the kick in my heart and turn the box over. “Kai doesn’t do cheesy gifts.”

“Kai? Don’t you mean Chase?” Barry asks.

I sigh. “Yeah, um. . .” Already too late to take it back, I throw him a dismissive wave. “It’s a . . . nickname.”

“Kai . . . oooh that’s so fucking hot.” Barry mock swoons and then winces dramatically when I start throwing my weight against the van’s door to get it to budge. “Perhaps we can hope for a useful gift. Such as a new car. And a junkyard to dump this one in.”

I laugh despite myself, tossing the package onto the passenger seat. “I don’t need a new car, Barry.”

“You needed a new one twenty years ago,” he deadpans. “Just let him spoil you already—vans, diamonds, jets, a whole-ass island—whatever else rich sugar daddies buy.”

“I don’t need or want his money,” I insist.

“Sure, sure.” Barry leans against my open door and crosses his arms. “Let’s be real, though. We’re all Cartier girls deep down. And judging by the shape of that box, Kai knows it, too.”

I roll my eyes, but excitement curls low in my stomach. I can’t remember the last time I got a real gift.

The Aldridges never bothered—just handed me envelopes of cash at Christmas like a donation. Theo stopped trying altogether because I kept refusing them.

But this? This feels . . . indulgent. Personal. And for the first time in years, I want to be spoiled.

“Come on, open it already.” Barry urges.

I tear at the brown packaging slowly, savoring the texture against my fingers. The glossy paper slides free, and I lift the lid in mounting anticipation.

My breath stops.

My mind is unable to process what I’m seeing.

Inside, nestled in the crisp white tissue paper, is a single black feather.

Its edges are dipped in red. Like blood.

Beneath it, a white card. Red ink slashed across the surface in bold, angry strokes. One word in bold letters, the rest in small cursive.

SLUT . . . is what you are.

The message hits me like a blow.

“The fuck?” Barry bends for a closer look.

My fingers shake as I touch the card. The ink smudges against my skin—deep red, still fresh.

“Nic?” Barry’s voice drops. “What is this?”

I try to speak. Nothing comes out. My throat is too tight, too dry.

Barry snatches the box from my bloodless hands, his eyes flicking to the feather, then to me.

“Who,” he demands, voice flat and cold, “the fuck would send you this?”

“I—I have no idea,” I whisper.

Barry stares at the card like it might start crawling up his arm. “This is sick, Nic. You need to tell someone—Kai, the university, the police—someone.”

I can’t look away from the card, its bold red letters searing into my brain

SLUT.

“You think Theo did this?” Barry presses. “He’s still sulking about the breakup—”

“No,” I cut him off, shaking my head. “Theo isn’t . . . He—he’s not like that. Besides, he doesn’t even know about me and Kai.”

“Who then? Someone from Valencia?”

A cold shiver runs down my spine. I was the subject of gossip, but that was weeks ago.

This . . . this is personal. This person knows me.

This isn’t about who I’m with. It’s about what I’ve done.

Those late night chats.

Buying stolen pieces of Kai from real life stalkers and crawling through the darkest corners of the internet.

Dealing with a world I thought would never find me out.

“You’re not getting behind the wheel in this state.” Barry crowds me into the driver’s seat, leaving me no choice but to scramble across the gear console.

“I have to pick up my kids. We have a session today,” I argue weakly.

“Yeah, and you’re clearly in the perfect headspace for that,” Barry snarks. “Don’t argue with me, Nic. You’re going straight home. And we’re reporting this to the police.”

My heart plummets. “No.”

“Nic—”

“I can’t,” I whisper. “What if . . . what if I caused this?”

Barry freezes. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I mean, I just . . . I need to think before we go to the police.”

Barry studies me, his eyes dark with concern. Then he exhales, running a hand through his hair.

“Fine. No police. For now. But you’re going home. And you’re taking the day off. I’ll pick up the kids and drop them home. Your class is canceled.”

I nod, swallowing hard. “Thanks, Barry.”

My thoughts churn like a storm as I press my head against the cool glass.

I couldn’t resist getting lost in the fairytale. And now it’s time to wake up.

Because fantasy and reality should never collide.

And the man in whose pool my stepsister drowned—whether he killed her or not—could never have been mine to begin with.

The van bumps over the last crack in my driveway, the familiar rattle of loose screws making Barry curse.

Then he whistles. “Well, shit.”

I look up from my phone where I’d been searching for the possible meanings of an ink/blood-soaked feather.

My stomach knots when I see Theo’s Range Rover Sport in our driveway.

This is the first time in almost two years that he’s set foot in Valencia.

Feeling my chest constrict, I take a few calming breaths, my fingers flexing against my thighs. “I really can’t deal with this right now.”

Barry shifts into park. “I know, babe. Want me to stay?”

Before I can answer, Bea appears from behind the Range Rover, her arms wrapped tightly around herself. Even from here, I can see she’s livid.

My hands shake as I push open the door and rush to meet my sister. “Bea? What’s wrong?”

Bea’s eyes flash. “They’re inside.”

I freeze. “They?”

She nods, and my heart drops into my stomach.

Shit. This is so much worse.

Barry steps up beside me.

“They’re all here, Barry,” I say.

“All of them?” His eyes widen.

“The trifecta.” Bea’s lips curl in derision.

“Okay, Nic. Game plan?” Barry asks.

“There isn’t one.” I swallow hard, push open the door, and step inside.

Everything stops.

The Aldridges are arranged like a tableau; Jack standing behind the couch, arms folded, Theo beside him looking raw in a way I’ve never seen, and a blotchy-faced Lilith on the couch, her manicured hands wrapped around my father’s trembling ones.

My stomach lurches violently

Dad’s eyes find mine. Unreadable and suspiciously glassy.

Behind me, Barry hovers near the door.

“What are you all doing here?” My voice scrapes out.

For a few moments, no one speaks.

Then Lilith stands, her blonde hair in a too-perfect bun—as if she’d stopped over at the hairdresser on her way here. Her long sequined dress flows around her dainty slippered feet. She comes to me, her trembling hands clutching each other. “Nicole. I failed you.”

The words hit me square in the chest.

Her gaze locks on mine, and suddenly I’m six again standing in their marble foyer, soaked from the rain and beyond awed by the majesty of their house.

“You were just a child when you came into my life. A child who needed love, stability . . . healing.”

My hands shake. I press them against my thighs, willing them still. Behind me, I hear Bea’s quick steps down the hallway and the soft click of her bedroom door.

Lilith’s breath hitches as she continues. “Instead of giving you that, I let you feel like you were someone who needed to be grateful instead of someone to be cherished.”

Jack steps forward and takes his wife into his arms, and something in my chest fractures at the raw emotion on his face.

“The prenup—“ Jack says. “God, Lil, what were we thinking? Lil and I were scared that our son’s stupidity would eventually push you away. But it was a sick, disgusting way to keep you bound to us.”

The word slices through me. For the first time, I let myself admit what I’ve never dared say out loud.

It hurt. A lot.

“But you’re not some stranger,” Lilith continues. “Not some interloper trying to take what’s ours. You’re our daughter. You always have been.”

I taste salt and realize I’m crying. My father’s hands are shaking worse now, and I can’t look at him. Can’t bear to see his silent tears.

My lungs won’t expand properly. The room tilts sideways as the weight of their words presses down on me.

All I can think about is how many times I felt like a charity case. How many times I told myself I didn’t need acceptance or unconditional love, that I didn’t need anything as long as my family was okay.

I was lying then.

I’m still lying now.

It’s too much.

The floodgates open, a broken sob barreling past my throat before I can stop it. My knees buckle, but strong arms catch me before I hit the floor.

Wrong arms.

Theo holds me against him as everything I’ve carried for so long spills out all at once.

He murmurs soothing words into my hair, but all I can think about is a deeper voice telling me to breathe through the pain in my chest.

“I’m so sorry, Nic,” Theo whispers. “Come back home. I don’t know how to live without you. Please don’t make me start.”

His words are like salve on a wound I never realized was festering, and I cling to him even as my mind betrays me with memories of a different kind of surrender.

For the first time, I feel their love—not the calculated kind that comes with expectations and caveats, but the messy, flawed love they managed to hide under their cruelty.

It takes what feels like an eternity before the storm inside me calms enough to speak.

“I—I’ll um, I’ll think about it, Theo.” The words feel like glass in my throat.

The relief on their faces is immediate and palpable.

Lilith cups my face with gentle hands. “Take your time, my darling,” she says softly. “Don’t rush yourself. Just . . . know we love you. Always.”

Theo presses a soft kiss to my temple, my nose. He hesitates, then dips his head to take my mouth, but I pull out of his arms.

He squeezes my hand instead. “I’ll wait, Nic. However long it takes.”

I glance at Barry, who’s hovering in the doorway, his arms crossed and his expression caught between nausea and pain.

“I’ll walk you out,” I say, my voice steadier than my legs feel.

As I lead them out, the weight of their words settles into my bones. The cracks they’ve opened in my carefully built walls are terrifying, but they’re also . . . freeing.

Another series of embraces, forehead kisses and goodbyes and the SUV finally disappears down the street.

I stand frozen in the driveway, my arms wrapped tightly around myself as if I can physically hold in everything that’s threatening to spill over.

My father’s silhouette fills the window. Watching. I’ve never seen him that emotional.

Behind me, Barry makes a noise that sounds suspiciously like a sob. I turn around, shocked to find his eyes red-rimmed.

“Are you . . . okay, Barry?”

He sniffs, swiping at his face, then gestures at the retreating SUV. “Yeah, yeah. I mean, since there was no beating them, I figured I’d join the crocodile tears party.”

My spine stiffens. “They were apologizing, Barry.”

He snorts, “Yeah? Well, I’m the fucking Queen of Sheba. Come on, Nic. You’re smarter than this.”

I don’t answer. My thoughts are spinning too fast, tangling together in a mess I can’t begin to unravel.

“You don’t understand.”

His jaw clenches. “No. I fucking don’t. Make me.”

I swallow hard. “They admitted they were wrong. That has to mean something, right? They’re trying. They love me. And they’re family. I—”I hesitate. My voice feels too raw, too exposed. “I love them.”

Barry exhales sharply. “Kai loves you.”

My stomach clenches painfully. “Don’t make me laugh.”

“I’ve got eyes in my fucking head, Nic. He does.”

I scoff, shaking my head. “Okay, for argument’s sake, let’s imagine for a second you’re right. He loves me. So what? You think I’m just going to throw eighteen years away for a man I barely know? “

Barry throws his arms out. “I think you should stop acting like time is the only thing that makes something real! Like eighteen years of obligation outweighs six weeks of finally being happy.”

Heat rises in my throat. “Obligation? That’s what you think they are?”

“I think they trained you to believe you owe them your goddamn soul,” Barry bites out. “Like their love is some debt you have to keep paying off.”

I cross my arms, my nails digging into my skin. “They’re my family, Barry.”

Barry laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “Right. Family. The same people who made you sign a fucking prenup to keep you chained to an unfaithful, selfish man?”

I flinch, because that hits way too close to the truth.

“You think you know everything,” I snap. “Like you’re the expert on my life. But where the fuck were you when I was six years old with no one? When my sister left me and my own father couldn’t bear to change the smelly bandages? Where were you when I couldn’t walk? When I needed surgeries and therapists and someone to actually fucking care?”

Barry’s jaw tightens, his eyes flashing. “That’s not fair.”

“No?” I let out a bitter laugh. “Because the Aldridges were there, Barry. They put a roof over my head. They gave me a future. They took care of my dad when no one else would.”

His nostrils flare. “And they reminded you of it every goddamn second of your life!”

I open my mouth to respond, but Barry isn’t done.

“Your heart is not payment, Nic!” His voice rises, cutting through the thick air. “It’s not some fucking prize for the people who did the most for you! Love isn’t a reward—it’s a choice!”

I whip around, my hands shaking. “You know what, maybe you should back the hell off my life and let me breathe for a second, Barry.”

Barry’s face goes slack, then he exhales harshly. “You know what? Maybe you’re right. Maybe it is better this way.”

“What the fuck do you mean? One hatemail and you turn tail and run. You don’t want something real, Nic. You want a comfort blanket. So go back. Wrap yourself in their safety net. Call it love if it helps you sleep.”

I stagger back, my pulse roaring in my ears. “Fuck you!”

Barry throws up his hands. “There she is! That’s the Nic I know! Deflect, shut down your emotions, and run back to them. Be their good little girl again. Let Theo beg for you while his mommy strokes your hair and tells you how special you are.”

I breathe hard, trying to swallow back the lump in my throat. “Get the fuck out of my face!”

“Fine,” Barry snaps, his voice dangerously quiet now. “Just don’t come crying to me when you realize you traded a real man for a fucking leash.”

And then he’s gone.