Page 30 of Spicy or Sweet (Wintermore #2)

SHAY

“Ican’t do this anymore, Shay.”

It’s funny how six words can split you in two, just like that.

Not just the words, but the trembling in Noelle’s voice as she says it.

I want to cross the space between us and wrap her in my arms, rub away the goosebumps peppering her skin where the cool air is hitting it, forehead-kiss away the pain in her voice.

But I’m frozen in place as the words sink in.

“I can’t do this anymore, Shay.”

“Noelle,” I say, the wind carrying the word until it’s nothing more than a whispered plea.

“I’ve been trying to talk to you about this all week,” she continues, a dull ache settling in my bones. “You keep distracting me and changing the subject, but we have to talk about it. We can’t keep pretending like things aren’t going to change now that we’re not working together.”

She’s not wrong. I’ve been avoiding this conversation like it’s my job, changing the subject whenever she brings it up, because I’m not ready to talk about it. But she’s also not wrong that we can’t keep acting like it’s not happening.

The movie is over, and we might very well be over with it.

“Okay,” I say, but I’m more choked up than I realize, and it’s barely audible. I clear my throat. “Okay. Let’s talk.”

I take a step toward her, and she takes one toward me, and we meet in the middle of the parking lot. I look up at Noelle on a regular day, but she’s wearing heels, so I’m forced to tilt my chin even more to meet her eye. She’s blindingly beautiful, a bright spot in an otherwise dreary day.

“I don’t even know where to start,” she says, and it’s killing me that I can’t reach out to her.

“I’ve been dreading this conversation,” I admit. “That’s why I kept avoiding it. I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not. I liked being in a bubble with you.”

“I did too. But it was easy to stay in a bubble when we had no choice but to be, and now that we’re not working together… Bubbles don’t last forever.”

“No. I suppose they don’t,” I reply, my voice weak.

Noelle hugs her body, clearly cold, but also making herself smaller, and I hate it. She lets out a shaky breath. “I never wanted to be your friend, Shay. At first, for all the wrong reasons, but after, I didn’t want you to be my friend. I just wanted you to be mine.”

Everything beyond Noelle and me disappears, and I swear my heart pauses for a moment, just letting her words sink in.

“You wanted…”

“I wanted—I want—you. You kept talking about how things were casual between us, and all I could think about was when I’d be seeing you next.

” Now that she’s started, Noelle’s words blend together almost manically.

“I’ve been trying so hard not to push you, but I wanted to take you on dates, bring you to family dinner, talk about a future together.

You keep calling it casual, but I think I’m falling in love with you!

” The blood drains from Noelle’s face, like she didn’t mean to say that, but I’m not sure I’ve ever heard anything sweeter.

Noelle lets out a growl of frustration that’s almost a sob. “Fuck, I just… I wanted to ask you to dance.”

The last word is swallowed by a rumble of thunder, and the sky spills down on us.

We both look up, and I draw in a deep breath as the rain hits my face.

Instantly, the air feels a hundred times clearer, and I’m seeing the whole situation between me and Noelle clearer too—how the hell could I have misinterpreted everything so much?

Nico was right. All I had to do was talk to her, and I could’ve saved us both a lot of stress.

But I was scared, and so was she, and now we’re at a crossroads—and I don’t plan on taking the wrong road.

“Let’s dance,” I say, holding my hand out to her. She stares at it, then me, like I’ve grown a second head.

“I’m sorry—what?”

“You wanted to ask me to dance. So let’s dance.”

Noelle blinks. “Here? You can feel that it’s pouring, right?”

“I can,” I say, stepping forward. “And I want to dance with the woman I know I’m falling in love with in the pouring rain.

” It doesn’t feel nearly as scary to say it as it did to overthink it; the words feel like exactly what I’m supposed to say, at exactly the right moment, like puzzle pieces slotting into place.

Her lips part, her eyes widening. Raindrops run down her face, smudging her eyeliner, but she’s never looked more beautiful than when she steps closer to me.

“Shay,” she breathes, threading her fingers through mine.

She’s icy cold as I pull her into me, her yellow dress clinging to her skin.

I slowly run one hand down her back, winding it around her waist, holding our clasped hands up.

I look up, and Noelle’s eyes are wet from more than just the rain. She presses her forehead to mine, mirroring my position as we sway. The music from the party is barely audible over the rain, but the happy sigh that falls from Noelle’s lips is my new favorite soundtrack.

We’re drenched, getting more soaked by the second, but I don’t care. The moment is perfect, dancing with Noelle in the chilly fall night, her clinging to me as much as I am her—as much as I’ve wanted to, this whole time. But now, I can.

“This is so much better than in there in front of everyone,” she says, laughing as I twirl her and pull her right back in.

“It is. Though, for the record, I would dance with you in front of everyone in a heartbeat, mon délice,” I murmur, and a smile crests Noelle’s lips.

“I never wanted casual,” I say, and she pulls back enough to catch my eye.

“I always wanted more—more than I thought we could have, if I’m being honest. But I was scared, and I didn’t think you were interested in anything since your life is so hectic. ”

Noelle worries her bottom lip with her teeth. “It is hectic. That part hasn’t changed. I can’t promise I’m going to be around as much as I have been while we’ve been working on the movie, and maybe it’s selfish of me to ask you to be with me without being with me all the time.”

“It’s not selfish. It’s not like I don’t know how busy you are, and, sure, I’m going to miss being with you most of the day, but I understand. I’m okay with it.”

“I’m not sure I’m okay with it,” she admits. “I know I need to find a better way of doing things so I’m not as miserable all the time, and we can actually spend time together, and I will. Probably not until after the tourist season, though. I understand if you want to wait—”

“I don’t,” I interrupt. “Time is a precious thing, and I’m not giving up a single second with you.”

Noelle’s eyes twinkle. “So, say I wanted to ask you to be my girlfriend…”

“I’d say it’s too late. I already claimed that title when we started this conversation,” I say, and she laughs, a sound so sunshiney, I swear the rain lets up a little.

I spin her around, dipping her. It’s not the most elegant, given how much taller than me she is in her heels, but she gasps, placing her hand flat on my chest when I pull her up.

“You’re good at this. You’ve been holding out on me, sweetheart.”

“I took dancing lessons when I was younger,” I explain.

“Huh. I guess we have a lot to learn about each other. It’s a nice thought.” Noelle’s smile slips a little before she continues, “But I do need to check: are you sure you’re okay with our age gap?”

“I’m sure,” I confirm. It’s not like I’ve forgotten about it completely, but I think about it a lot less when we’re together than I did a few weeks ago.

“A hundred percent? Because I understand why you’re hesitant. It’s not always going to be easy.”

“I know that.”

“People will judge us,” she continues. “They’re going to talk about us behind our backs. And to our faces, probably. I’ve been with Rora and my uncle Henry, and I’ve seen people mistake him for her dad.”

“Are you trying to convince me to change my mind?” I ask, joking mostly, but she shakes her head quickly.

“No. No, of course not. I just want to make sure you’re comfortable with everything,” she says, rushing her words together.

“I am. I promise. Like you said, it’s not always going to be easy, but I don’t care what people say about us. Do you?”

She wrinkles her nose. “Of course I don’t.”

“Well, then. Now that we have that out of the way…” I clasp her face between my hands, brushing the tip of her nose with mine. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

“I’d like to kiss my girlfriend in the rain now, if that’s okay with you.”

Noelle doesn’t answer with words. Capturing my lips, she slips her tongue between them, groaning as she drinks me in. She tastes like all of my favorite flavors in one place.

She tastes like… mine.