Page 35 of Someone in the Water

Frankie

‘What do we drink?’ Harriet asks, resting her arms on the mahogany bar and staring at the line of bottles across the wall behind it. ‘What would Archie approve of?’

‘Tequila shots,’ Jack mutters. ‘Multiple.’

‘Hey, guys,’ Henri says, ambling over and spreading his palms across the bar. ‘I’m sorry to hear about—’

‘Ten tequilas please,’ Izzy interrupts, and I wonder how much this is about settling her own nerves after confronting Salvo rather than complying with Jack’s wishes.

Henri nods, understanding clear on his face. ‘Sure.’

I watch him line up ten shot glasses and free-pour from a bottle of tequila.

Then we all step forward. The last two days have been the worst of my life – discovering Archie’s lifeless body, Salvo messing with my head, only sleeping long enough for that terrible nightmare to come – and the numbing effects of alcohol are exactly what I need, so I pick up a glass, rest its rim against my bottom lip, flick my wrist, and swallow the burning liquid.

‘And another one,’ Izzy says, reaching for her second glass.

I down the next drink without hesitation too. The alcohol races into my bloodstream, and I love how it floods me with a new energy. The promise of oblivion maybe. ‘Shall I get us another one?’ I ask.

‘Do you think we should just take a moment?’ Harriet says.

‘I think we deserve to get wasted after what we’ve all been through,’ Izzy counters, stroking my back. She lowers her voice to a whisper. ‘Especially you.’

I flinch on instinct, but she’s right. I am right at the centre of this. Tears threaten so I shout Henri’s name to fight against them. It’s loud and he comes straight over.

‘Ten more,’ I say.

He scans all our faces, and the others must look determined too, because he collects up the empty glasses and replaces them with fresh without questioning the speed of our drinking.

‘How about we sit down for these,’ Dom says. ‘We haven’t even raised a toast to Archie yet.’

My face smarts as I realise he’s right, and I carry my two new shots over to an empty table in the corner.

Izzy sits on one side of me, but I tense as Jack drops into the chair on my right.

I close my eyes for a moment to ride the fear, but then I see Archie’s face, hear his voice. Jack tried to kill his family, Frankie.

I open my eyes.

‘A toast,’ Dom announces. ‘To Archie, a lovely bloke who—’

‘Shut up.’ Jack’s caustic words make me jump.

‘All right, chill out,’ Dom says.

‘He was my boyfriend. I should do the toast.’

‘Yeah, of course, you’re right,’ Dom says, chastened, even though he’s a far better man than Jack could ever be. He reaches for his glass – probably to avoid Jack’s glare – and his fingers graze mine. A jolt of charge rushes through me, but it repels him. He spills some of his drink, swears.

‘To Archie,’ Jack says, raising his glass.

‘Why the fuck did you leave me?’ His voice breaks and he throws the fiery liquid into his mouth, then reaches for the second glass and does the same.

Anger rises inside me. How dare he play the victim?

He as good as killed Archie with his confession.

I shake my head, blow out air, and down a shot.

‘What?’ Jack asks. ‘You didn’t like my toast?’

‘Why are you pretending that you don’t know why he did it?’ The words are out before I can stop them.

Jack’s face contorts. ‘What the fuck does that mean?’

My head is buzzing now. Henri has cranked up the music and Destiny’s Child is blaring out of two huge speakers. ‘It means that it’s your fault, dickhead. And don’t tell me you can’t see it.’ I drink the second shot. I wonder for a moment if it’s going to come back up, but then my stomach settles.

‘Jesus, Frankie!’ Dom shakes his head. ‘When are you going to learn to keep your mouth shut? The guy’s just lost his partner. Where’s your compassion?’

‘My compassion?!’ I’m slurring my words now. I need to stop talking. Dom thinks I’m a bitch, and fuck, Jack is capable of murder. He tried to kill his family. What will he do to me if I start spilling his secret?

‘Listen, everyone needs to take a moment,’ Izzy says, picking up my hand and squeezing it. ‘We’re all devastated by what Archie did. And confused. It’s natural to lash out, but we should be supporting each other.’

‘I didn’t think I’d ever agree so wholeheartedly with something Izzy said,’ Harriet picks up. ‘But she’s right about this. How about I get us some beers? Archie liked beer, right? Then we can take it slow, give ourselves time to make friends again and remember Archie properly.’

‘I’ll help,’ Dom mutters, pushing out of his chair. The two of them disappear, leaving just Jack, Izzy and me.

Izzy leans in. ‘Say sorry,’ she whispers into my ear. ‘Trust me, you don’t want Jack as your enemy.’

I think about Archie. His lifeless body.

Then I think about what Jack’s capable of.

Izzy’s warning must mean that she knows what he did too, so at least I’ll be able to confide in her when we’re next alone.

Maybe that will be enough to get me through this.

‘I shouldn’t have said that,’ I mumble, looking down at the table.

‘No you fucking shouldn’t,’ Jack throws back. ‘I loved him. I’m fucking broken. Why the hell would you blame me when you’re the one he turned to for help and you clearly did fuck all?’ He sighs and his volume lowers. ‘Did he say something about me?’

Izzy squeezes my hand, and it helps me find the words. ‘No, nothing bad anyway,’ I stutter, feeling the weight of Jack’s accusation despite everything. ‘Archie was upset but he wouldn’t tell me why. I guess I assumed it was to do with you, but that wasn’t fair, so I’m sorry.’

Jack’s expression stays impassive, but he gives me a small nod. Then we sit in silence until Dom and Harriet return with the beers.

Maybe it is the more mellow alcohol, or maybe we’ve said all there is to say, but gradually the mood settles, then improves.

We start sharing stories about Archie – his pale skin always turning pink in the sunshine, the female guests who’d fall for his Scottish brogue, then wonder why their flirting got them nowhere.

Hours pass, and the sky grows inky black.

‘Hey look,’ Izzy says, pointing to the clock on the wall. ‘It’s nearly midnight. Almost August.’

‘God, is it really?’ Harriet moans. ‘That means I need to be up in seven hours.’

‘Ah, stop being so boring,’ Izzy says. ‘Do you know what I think we should do?’

‘What?’ I ask.

‘Make this a night we won’t forget, for Archie’s sake.’

‘What are you thinking, Izzy?’ Dom asks.

‘Let’s go for a midnight swim.’

I think about diving into the sea, my favourite place. How it would cool my skin, clear my mind. The dark water giving me the space to think straight. To believe I can get through this. I stand up, sway a little. ‘Yes, let’s do it!’