Page 20 of Soaring into the Midlife

Sopping wet with chocolate and paint and feeling like a walking disaster, not to mention the dried gelatin, I squinted past the chaos to spot salvation. A door at the far end of the gallery. It was almost lost behind what looked like a cosmic blender's aftermath: a giant painting of a swirling galaxy. Stars and nebulae danced in a dizzying array of colors that were so vivid, that it felt like gazing into the universe's groovy lava lamp.

"Guys, a door!" I yelled, pointing with a chocolate-coated finger. "That's our exit!"

"Looks more like a black hole from here." Kendra eyed the celestial spectacle warily.

"Better than being Van Gogh's nextStarry, Smeary Night." Zara flicked a glob of yellow off her hand.

We made a break for it, but our path wasn't clear for long. With each step, more paintings around us came to life. A dapper gentleman with an overly waxed mustache hopped out of hisgilded frame, cane twirling with unnecessary flair. A woman in a bonnet, straight out of a Jane Austen novel, stepped into our world, looking utterly scandalized by the sight of three paint-soaked women on the run.

"Excuse us, coming through!" I tried to sidestep yet a bowl of fruit that had rolled onto the floor, apples bobbing like they were trying out for the Fruit Olympics or something. “What is it with all the paintings of bowls of fruit? Paint something else!”

"Are they friendly?" Kendra asked, ducking as a parrot from a tropical scene took flight, nearly taking her ear with it.

"Doesn't matter. Keep moving!" I wasn’t willing to stick around long enough to find out.

But the animated figures weren't just stepping out to say hello; they were forming a barrier between us and our escape route. The dapper gent raised his cane like a conductor's baton, and the others seemed to fall into step, creating a living blockade of petticoats, feathers, and still-life fruit.

"Back off, Monet's minions!" Zara snapped, trying to push through only to be met with resistance from a stern-looking matron who must have escaped from a church picnic scene.

"Could use a dragon about now," Kendra said under her breath, which of course, was my cue.

"Dragon it is." I felt the familiar pull of transformation. But before I could unleash my inner beast, I remembered the cramped space and the potential for turning my friends into accidental s'mores. "Or... maybe not."

"Plan B?" Zara ducked as another parrot dive-bombed us.

"Plan B," I said with a nod.

"Running and dodging?" Kendra guessed.

"Running and dodging," I affirmed.

And so, we darted, ducked, and weaved—three sticky, paint-covered musketeers—making our way through the animated obstacle course, determined to reach that door and whatever semblance of normalcy lay beyond it.

"Zara, where the heck are you going?" I shouted, but she was already out of earshot, sprinting back through the gallery in the direction we'd come from like a bat—well, more accurately, a vampire—out of hell. Kendra and I exchanged a look that was one part panic and two parts exasperation before we followed in hot pursuit.

"Hailey, she's—" Kendra said only to be cut off as Zara reemerged atop the elephant from before. She was grinning like a kid who'd just discovered her sundae had an extra scoop of ice cream.

"Come on!" Zara yelled, beckoning us with a wild wave of her arm as the elephant bulldozed through the crowd of animated figures with surprising agility for its size.

"Sure, why not?" I said, and we dashed after her. The elephant was like a living battering ram, clearing a path straight toward freedom—or at least toward the door that promised it.

"Watch out!" Kendra shrieked suddenly, yanking me to the side as a steaming pile of elephant dung dropped perilously close to our feet. "Ew! Seriously?"

"Better than being squashed by a fruit bowl." I danced around another heap of poo.

"Look out!" I said again as the elephant unexpectedly veered right, heading straight for a massive painting of a chess set, pieces frozen mid-battle.

"Zara, no!" But it was too late; the elephant was inside the painting. Zara was already dismounting, leaping off the elephant's back with an Olympic-worthy gymnast's flourish. Except when she tried to return, an invisible barrier seemed to hold her back, trapped within the frame.

Kendra reached into the painting, grasping for Zara's outstretched arm. But instead of pulling Zara out, she got sucked into the chessboard world herself.

"Great." I sighed, rolling my eyes at the absurdity of it all. "Here we go." With no time to second-guess, I jumped through the painting after them, ready for whatever wacky Wonderland awaited us on the other side.

9

"Checkmate?"I said as a regal-looking woman appeared before us, holding a chess set. The phrase seemed right, given the situation. Kendra and Zara exchanged glances and shook their heads at my attempt at humor.

"Hello there," the woman said. “I’m Lady Bishop. Would you like to play?" She gestured to the chess set she held.