Page 17 of So Savage (Faith Bold #21)

Lillian Martin had lost her virginity after senior prom, like most teenagers in America. Back then, her “extracurricular” activities were limited to a neighbor’s cat and the variety of wild vermin that wandered the forests of West Virginia, so she didn’t feel a need to sequester herself from people the way she did now.

The boy she was going with wasn’t particularly handsome, but that didn’t matter. That wasn’t what this was about, anyway. This was just something that needed to be done. It was a part of growing up.

Still, Lillian remembered the nervous anticipation she felt. She knew Curt was going to try something, and unless he did something really stupid or some unforeseen disaster struck, she was going to let him. So, like many people before their first time, she stressed out terribly over her outfit and makeup, teasing her hair until it was curled just right, tweezing off every bit of hair that wasn’t growing from her scalp and carefully applying her makeup to highlight her eyes and her lips—her best features to this day.

It had worked, although now, fifteen years later, she realized that she could have attended the dance in sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt and gotten laid. It was easy when the guy in question was seventeen and also a virgin.

But she felt the same nervous anticipation today. She was going to see Franklin West in person for the first time.

So she woke at three-thirty in the morning and spent four hours showering, blow drying and styling her hair, applying makeup, ironing her clothes and agonizing over how many buttons to leave open, polishing her shoes, whitening her teeth, looking at her reflection in the mirror and practicing her smile and a whole host of other little anxieties that she had to get through to make the big day.

But now she was here. Now she was going to see him. She couldn’t wait.

It would be a nice reprieve from the extraordinarily frustrating last two months. When she killed Grant Monroe, she expected Faith to immediately pop out of the woodwork and come for her like a hawk after a snake.

Instead, the bitch had vanished. Run off with her tail between her legs like… like… Well, like a bitch.

Of course, she would turn coward now. When it was Lillian chasing her and not Trammell or West. She supposed she should be flattered that Faith feared her so much, but it was just really irritating. She wanted to get Faith for West, wanted him to see her and know that she had avenged him. Not just avenged him but surpassed him, done what he couldn't. She knew he wouldn't be jealous. He would admire her. He would want to possess her, possess the creature that had killed the deepest thorn in his side.

And for Franklin West, Lillian would absolutely be possessed.

But Faith was gone, and Lillian hadn’t been able to find her. Maybe if she had more resources, she could, but there was only so much Google could tell her about someone who wasn’t getting paid to show as much ass as possible while lip-syncing to someone else’s music or to flip around on a green screen while a pimple-faced animator added in monsters that looked like they walked off of a five-year-old’s drawing. It turned out Faith wasn’t nearly as much of a celebrity as Lillian thought she was.

And she couldn’t wait anymore. She needed to see him. She needed him to see her. She and Curt hadn’t lasted, obviously, but she still enjoyed remembering the look in his eyes when they were finally alone and he realized she was going to say yes. She needed to see West look at her the same way.

She could only hope that he’d understand about Faith. After all, he’d tried for years and eventually lost. He’d give her more time? Right?

“All rise for the Honorable Judge Peter Holland.”

She gasped and got to her feet, pulled back to reality by the bailiff’s announcement. A moment later, the short, fat, balding judge waddled to the bench, and the bailiff announced regally, “You may sit.”

Lillian took a seat and gripped the front of the bench to keep from playing with her fingers. The judge went through the bullshit ceremonial stuff, then finally, at long last, said, “Bring the defendant in.”

Lillian stood. Thankfully, so did everyone else, so she didn't look like a complete idiot. People jostled for a better view, but Lillian had planned this out for weeks. She had chosen a spot to sit where she would get a clear view of Franklin West no matter what everyone else did. More importantly, he would get a clear look at her.

The door opened. Sound died away. Franklin West, the Copycat Killer, the protégé who had far surpassed his inspiration, walked into the courtroom, escorted by four police officers. He looked a little thinner than he did on TV, and his hair was a little longer and wilder. Grayish stubble grew on his neck, and there were a few more lines on his face than she remembered from the news.

But his eyes blazed just as brilliantly as ever, and he wore the slight smile that made Lillian’s knees weak. That smile told her and the world that he was still a god, that whatever these pathetic little creatures did to him, he would always be a god, and they could grovel and whine and snarl and fight and even kill him. They could do whatever made them happy, but it wouldn’t matter. He had made his mark in history. He would be remembered while everyone in this room faded into nothingness.

She took a deep breath and started to lift her hand to get his attention, but it made it only to her waist when he turned and looked at her.

Time stopped. His eyes bored into hers, stripping her naked—body, mind and soul. She gasped as heat and cold rushed through her in deep, rippling pulses. Her knees grew weak, and the soles of her feet tingled. It really was like looking at a god.

Those eyes saw her. Those eyes knew. Those eyes read her secret thoughts. She didn’t need to tell him that she was his, that she was his Messenger. He knew. He knew, and when the smile widened, she knew that he approved.

And his message was clear. Keep looking. You’ll find her.

And when you do, kill her.

“I’ll kill her, Frank,” she whispered, too softly for those around her to hear. “I’ll kill her. And I’ll find you. We’ll be together. We’ll be one. Just like we were meant to be.”