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It had been several months since Grant Monroe—immortalized as The Boss in the hearts and minds of the team at the Philadelphia Field Office—was murdered by the Messenger, but in Faith’s eyes, it still seemed sacrilegious for anyone else to sit in his chair.

It didn’t help that the someone sitting in his chair was Assistant Special Agent-in-Charge Tabitha Gardner, a religiously by-the-book leader who despised Faith.

It especially didn’t help that Faith was going to grant Tabitha her greatest wish today.

To add to Faith’s discomfort, her partner—Special Agent Michael Prince—was sitting in the chair to her right. Turk sat in between them, wagging his tail, and his presence was the only thing that gave her the strength to say what she needed to say.

Rounding out the cast of characters was Section Chief Patel, The Boss’s—and now Tabitha’s—immediate superior, and Deputy Director Smythe.

Smythe and Patel visited the field office from time to time to check on Tabitha’s performance.

If she met their expectations, she would almost certainly become Faith’s new boss.

Another reason why leaving the field office and taking an instructional job was the right choice for her.

Mostly, though, it was about Turk. Faith didn’t want him to be a target anymore. If the two of them were in Virginia living hundreds of miles from the Messenger and working at one of the most secure campuses in the world, there would be next to no chance that she could reach him.

“Good morning, Special Agent Bold,” Tabitha said, giving Faith a smile she very much didn’t mean. Had to look good for the brass, though. “I’m happy to see that your dog is all better.”

“K9 Officer Turk is excellent, thank you,” Faith replied, not bothering with a return smile.

“Of course,” Tabitha replied, eyes flashing venom at Faith. “I see here that your therapist, Dr. Keraya”—she pronounced it care-uh-yuh—“is recommending that you be returned to active duty effective immediately.”

Her tone betrayed surprise and irritation at that fact. Faith noticed the corners of Smythe’s mouth turn up. She wondered if Tabitha knew that her boss’s boss was reading her like a book.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Tabitha nodded. “Well, I know that you’ve asked to be assigned to the Messenger case—”

“Actually, ma’am, I’ve withdrawn my request to work that case.”

Tabitha stared at her in open-mouthed shock that she didn’t even attempt to hide.

Michael raised an eyebrow at her. Tabitha blinked and stammered for a moment before saying, “Ah. Well, that’s good because as I’ve reminded you in the past, FBI policy is to refrain from assigning agents to work cases when there is a personal conflict involved. ”

She fell silent and looked at Faith expectantly. Faith didn’t say anything.

Tabitha frowned and reddened slightly. She corrected the frown, but she couldn’t do anything about the flush. “However, we do have a case that we think is appropriate for your expertise. The victim is—”

“Ma’am, if I may,” Faith interrupted.

Tabitha’s eyes flashed again. “You…” she caught herself and finished, “may.”

Faith took a deep breath. Here goes . “I’ve decided that I would like to retire from field work.”

Michael flinched. Smythe’s and Patel’s eyes widened. Tabitha looked at Faith first in stunned silence, then in wariness. This was too good to be true. There was no way that Faith Bold was actually going to retire and get out of her hair that easily. “You’ve decided to leave the Agency?”

Faith almost chuckled at the hope in Tabitha’s voice. “No. I would like to apply for an instructor’s position at the K9 training facility in Quantico.”

“Jesus Christ,” Michael exclaimed.

“Special Agent Prince, please,” Tabitha snapped. She had overcome her surprise and was now eager to wrap this up and get Faith off of her team.

Smythe, unfortunately, wasn’t so easily persuaded. He leaned forward and stared at Faith with half-lidded eyes that looked bored, but that Faith knew hid a mind as sharp as any she’d ever met. “May I ask what brought you to this decision, Special Agent?”

Faith took a shaky breath and delivered her prepared answer. “As you know, sir, Turk is past the mandatory retirement age for K9 officers assigned to fieldwork.”

“He passed all his physicals, though,” Michael interjected. “He’s healthy as an ox.”

“Special Agent Prince, please,” Tabitha snapped again. “Go on, Special Agent Bold.”

“He did pass his physicals,” Faith agreed, avoiding Michael’s piercing stare. “However, he will be ten years old in a few weeks, and while I am pleased that he continues to be in the best of health, I fear that his longevity as a field agent is questionable.”

“Do you have reason to question his longevity aside from his age?” Smythe asked.

Faith had to be honest. It would be easy enough to look up Turk's records and discover that he had scored in the ninety-seventh percentile or better in every single Bureau fitness and performance test at his most recent physical. "No, sir."

Smythe leaned back and sighed. Faith could tell she wasn’t succeeding at convincing him.

She knew it was better not to press the issue, but she couldn’t help herself.

“I believe that my experience coupled with Turk’s experience makes us perfect candidates as K9 instructors.

I’m not being arrogant when I point out that the two of us have enjoyed—excuse me, the three of us—have enjoyed a nearly flawless solve rate in our career together.

Our knowledge would prove invaluable to young K9 handlers and their dogs as they learn how to—"

Smythe lifted a hand. “Thank you, Agent. You passed your psychological evaluation, correct?”

Faith’s shoulders tensed slightly. “Yes, sir, I did. However—”

Tabitha interrupted. “Those tests are often flawed, sir. We’ve had several instances where therapists have cleared agents for work only for those agents to prove unable to perform their duties at the standard expected by the Bureau. If Special Agent Bold believes she is mentally unfit for duty—”

“I do not believe I’m mentally unfit for duty, ma’am,” Faith interrupted coldly.

“Neither do I,” Smythe replied. “Perhaps you and ASAC Gardner aren’t aware of this, but Dr. Keraya”—he pronounced her name correctly, and Tabitha reddened—“is one of the most experienced psychological evaluators in the Bureau. She is especially adept at telling the difference between whether an agent is unable to continue in the performance of their duty or unwilling.”

“If she’s unwilling, sir, then respectfully, I don’t—”

Smythe held up a hand without looking at Tabitha. She flinched as though he had struck her with that hand.

“Have you read your psychological report, Special Agent Bold?” Smythe asked.

Faith shook her head. “No, sir.”

"It's quite interesting. I'll quote a sample from memory. 'Special Agent Bold will likely attempt to withdraw from fieldwork in the immediate future. It is my professional opinion that allowing her to do so would not only be a disservice to the Bureau but a disservice to my patient.'"

Now it was Faith’s turn to start. “What? She said that?”

“You memorized that?” Tabitha added.

“She did. I did,” Smythe replied. “If I may continue. ‘Faith is frightened of the Messenger Killer and she is afraid that her dog will be targeted again.’”

Damn it, he has a name , Faith thought irritably.

“‘While these feelings are difficult for her, I don’t believe they are traumatizing. However, if she is not compelled to confront her fears directly, the weight of guilt, grief, and anxiety will continue to grow until she is not only rendered unfit for service but possibly also rendered unfit for daily life. To summarize, the best possible thing for Bold’s mental health is to be put to work as soon as possible. ’

“She goes on to list reasons and supporting arguments for her recommendation. I won’t elucidate them here. The report is available for you, ASAC Gardner, and anyone else who would like to review it provided they do so with your permission, Special Agent Bold.”

Faith’s hands balled into fists. “With all due respect, Director Smythe, Dr. Keraya isn’t the one experiencing nightmares or waking up in cold sweats every damned day.”

“With all due respect, Special Agent Bold, you’ve suffered scenarios like this before.

They’ve made you stronger and more capable.

They’ve honed you into the sort of agent people write novels about.

They’ve turned you into a weapon for justice unlike anything I’ve ever seen in my thirty-four years of service with the FBI. They’ve saved lives.”

“What about her life?” Tabitha said. She was desperate now, grabbing at any straw she could to get Faith out of the unit.

“Doesn’t she have a right to relax and enjoy her life instead of constantly suffering for others?

I understand we have a job to do, sir, but if Faith doesn’t feel she’s capable of this anymore, then I believe we should honor her wishes. ”

“We will honor her wishes,” Smythe replied mildly.

“Special Agent Bold, if after hearing this, you believe that retirement is still the best option for you and Turk, I will process the paperwork and accept you immediately as a K9 instructor at Quantico. You won’t even need to fill out an application.

But I encourage you to think hard about it.

I won’t pretend to know you as well as your partner does, but I believe he’d agree with me that if you make this decision in error, you will never forgive yourself. ”

“I do agree,” Michael said firmly, “and if I could have two minutes with Faith, I think I can convince her of the same thing.”

“Of course,” Smythe said.

Michael got up and gestured for Faith to follow him. She did so reluctantly, Turk trotting next to her. He led her outside and around the corner. Faith caught Tabitha arguing with Smythe out of the corner of her eye. Begging was more like it.

When they were out of sight, Michael turned around and said, “Faith, look me in the eye and tell me you’re happy to retire now.”

“I don’t want him to die, Michael! I don’t…” She pressed her lips together and blinked back tears. “You saw me. You saw what happened to me at that hospital. You saw what happened to Turk .”

“I did. And he’s just as strong and happy as if nothing had happened.”

“Something did happen. And it will happen again unless we find the bitch who did this to him.”

“We will find her. And if we find her while you’re teaching people how to hold a leash at Quantico, you’ll never forgive yourself.

I’ve known you for twelve years, Faith. You’re not ready to retire.

Not this way. Not out of fear. When you hang it up, it’ll be because you’re old and tired or because you’re bored and ready for a new challenge.

It won’t be because some psychopath broke you. ”

West’s leer flashed across Faith’s mind. His oft-repeated promise rang in her ears. I will break you.

That finally tipped the scales. She sighed and nodded. “You’re right. I hate you, and I’m really worried that I’m just going to get Turk killed this way, but you’re right. I’m just afraid.”

She closed her eyes and tried to stop herself from sobbing. She was successful but only just.

“I know,” Michael said. “And I know that you really are traumatized. Nine hundred ninety-nine times out of a thousand, I would tell you that retirement is the best thing you could do, but you’re the one time out of a thousand.

You’re not any other agent. You’re Faith-goddamned-Bold.

If you left like this, you’d feel relief for a little while.

Then you’d feel a lifetime of regret that would absolutely destroy you. ”

Faith thought of a future as a K-9 instructor, no longer in the field, no longer catching bad guys or giving innocent victims the justice they deserved. She thought of Turk, safe and probably fulfilled. He was easy to please.

But would she be fulfilled?

No, she wouldn’t. Especially knowing that one of these psychopaths had finally gotten to her. One of them had finally broken her.

She took a deep breath and smiled at him. “Okay. We’ll get back to work.”

“We will. And we’ll find the bitch who hurt Turk. You have my word on that.”

Faith thanked him and followed him back to the office to deliver the news to their superiors, but even though she agreed with his opinion on retirement, she knew he couldn’t keep his last promise.

Maybe they would find the Messenger. Maybe they wouldn’t.

Since Faith wasn’t allowed to touch the Messenger case, Michael wasn’t either. It was out of their hands.

She was still out there somewhere, and as long as she was, Faith would never feel truly safe.