Page 97 of Shattered Dreams
Dear Diary,
It’s me again. It’s been a while—more than two years.
Where do I begin? I think I want to pick up where I left off with you when Maya showed up on my doorstep.
Life with her as a roommate was actually pretty normal, if you can believe it—at least until she started dating Jess a few months ago. It’s been insane since then. Last month Maya took me to an illegal fight organized by Jess and his friend Kane. And Diary, you would never guess. KREW was one of the fighters! I was so happy to see him again, until his brother stepped into the ring. I was so terrified, I ran out of there and locked myself in my apartment.
I’m ashamed about this next part, Diary. But since you know all of my deepest secrets, I’m going to confess one more. I was so upset about seeing that monster again, that after I got home, I cut myself. I’d been doing so good—it had been years since I’d picked up a razor blade. But I did it. Just one cut, and it made me feel at peace for a few seconds, until the realization of what I did came rushing in.
Okay, I’m back. Sorry those last few sentences—my hand was really shaking from remembering my lapse. But I’m good now. Got a drink of water and repeated my mantra to settle myself.
I’m alive. I’m safe. I’m here.
Ready for more shocking news, Diary? I’m just gonna lay it all out—it’s pretty much a clusterfuck. After I took off from the fight, Kane was shot dead. Maya saw the whole thing happen.
But get this, when I woke up the next morning, Maya was gone and a huge thug broke into the apartment and tried to kill me. If it wasn’t for Krew AND DECKER!! Yes, I said Decker, I’d be dead. Decker killed the meathead, and I passed out.
I woke up in a crappy motel all freaked out. I still can’t believe the guys kidnapped me and brought me there!
But wait. There’s more, Diary.
Someone shot at the motel room’s window because—get this, there are contracts out on me and on Krew!! Decker said so. He’s a hitman now. To keep us safe, he hid Krew and me up in fricking Vermont, but even there we were attacked by other hitmen.
I escaped and came back here to Elida to see my parents. On the way, I learned Maya was home for her father’s funeral. I decided I was going to confront Maya, about everything that happened since the fight.
Seeing my parents was okay. They had a lot of questions, tears and hugs. Overall, I’m glad to be home.
Now the for the Maya part.
After the funeral, I went to Maya’s house to get some answers—we fought—and I accidentally stabbed her. Or Maya purposefully pushed herself onto the letter opener I was still holding—I’m still not sure on that part. But Krew and Decker were there. And they saw everything, including her lying through her teeth.
Anyway, the police were called. I was led outside by a deputy and we stood on the sidewalk—him, me, my parents, Krew and Decker—and watched Maya get put in an ambulance. After they drove away, all of us saw Teke standing by his car.
Condensed version, Diary. Decker took off after Teke. Teke saw Decker, and the bastard got in his car and sped away. Decker got in his truck and was right on his tail. And I haven’t seen Decker since.
Soon after, the sheriff read me my Miranda rights and handcuffed me like I was a criminal. Who could blame him, when I was standing there, covered in someone else’s blood. Krew started to argue, and so did my parents, but it was no use.
Believe me when I say that being arrested and taken to jail wasn’t the worst of it. No, the worst was being interrogated. I swear I could feel the trauma from it piling onto my PTSD.
At every turn, the cops tried to discount my version of that disaster, believing what Maya told them before she was taken to the hospital instead of what I described. That bitch is just like Krew and Decker said—only out for herself.
In the end, I was set free nearly twenty-four hours later, because Maya didn’t file charges against me.
What’s strange about all this, Diary? Maya disappeared from the hospital without a trace. No discharge from care, no word to anyone—poof. Gone. Was it her own doing or did someone else make her disappear? I couldn’t say. And I’m not heartbroken about it.
What is breaking my heart? Decker hasn’t come back. And Krew hasn’t either.
I’ve spent most of the time at my parents’ house, waiting for them. My mother is elated by their absence in my life, which irritates me.
I attempted to reach out to Krew’s father, but he hung up on me the second I told him who I was. And Decker’s dad was no better.
Without a word from either of my men, and with Maya missing in action, I assume my life can go back to normal. As much as I love my parents, I have to leave, head back to Chicago, where my life is and try to get my job back.
What do you think, Diary? Is leaving the right thing or should I wait a few more days for them? Should I move on with my life? Maybe even start dating again. Please disregard that part. The second I wrote those words I realize that I can never date anyone—not when I’m still very much in love with Krew and Decker.
No matter what, my love for Krew and Decker will always be with me. Even if I never see them again, that time in Vermont (and here’s a delicious confession, Diary) will be my Best Memory Ever, because I was finally able to be with them—the three of us loving on each other. It will be enough.
This is the most that I have ever written to you, but I had a lot to tell you.
Diary, Krew just showed up and he said we needed to leave—like now. I gotta go. Sorry…
Love, Regina