Page 20 of Shadow (Marinah and the Apocalypse #1)

King

M y shoulder throbbed, my head pounded, and a raging hard-on added insult to injury. Even after battling hellhounds, enduring a bite, and wrestling with poison all night, she got under my skin. Her effect on the man in me was only one of the problems. Beast’s reaction when she locked eyes with us was equally baffling. Beast’s fixation, whether to kill or initiate sex, was a puzzle I couldn’t solve.

I dragged myself out of bed, ignoring Axel’s orders. The man coddled his patients like a mother hen, and I wasn’t in the mood to be fussed over. Standing was a trial. Pain shot through my shoulder with every breath. Axel had to cut out the necrotic tissue from the hellhound bite, something we’d learned to do quickly to stop the spread. Without our accelerated healing and the antidote, I’d have died a dozen times over by now.

I tugged my pants on, suppressing a groan, and glanced at the door, half-expecting Axel to burst in and berate me. When I was finally dressed, I slipped out of the room. Food, a shower, and a ride, those were my priorities, in that order.

An hour later, I was on my bike, the engine roaring as I rode along the coastline. The pain in my shoulder was subsiding, replaced by the familiar itch of healing. I could handle that. Somehow, I had managed to slip out of the citadel without anyone trailing me. It was a rare moment of solitude, and I savored it.

Pack mentality was our usual status quo, and we thrived on interaction, but there were times when I needed space to think. My warriors had no sense of personal boundaries. Between their constant bickering and Axel’s relentless worrying, I was ready to claw my way out of my skin. It was worse at the citadel. At least at my real home, I could lock the door. Not that it stopped them. Beck, for instance, would knock every ten minutes until I let him in. I had tested him, and six hours later, he was still at it.

The salty tang of the ocean air eased the ache in my dick, but it didn’t help untangle my thoughts about Marinah. I had already shown her enough to put us in serious jeopardy. It was knowledge we’d only reveal if we truly trusted the Federation. The problem was, I didn’t know if trust was possible anymore. What she now carried in her memory were our leverage points. She knew we had hellhounds, that we’d been studying them, what they were, who made them, and that we’d developed an antidote to keep Shadow Warriors alive if bitten. And yet, there was so much more I wanted to share.

I needed someone to talk sense into me.

Beast rumbled beneath my skin.

“Yes, I know, kill her,” I muttered aloud. His rumble intensified, a low growl of agreement, and I twisted the throttle, letting the bike eat up the miles.

The truth was, I was attracted to her. And Beast wasn’t. That was a dynamic that wouldn’t work. No matter how much I tried to separate us, we were one and the same. I couldn’t afford to want a woman he despised. Too much could go wrong. Near an orgasm, Beast was harder to control. It was one of the most difficult lessons we learned as adolescents. Back when we lived hidden among humans, mastering Beast was a prerequisite before any of us could have sex.

In my younger years, I had worried about the obvious consequences of losing control, navigating those early sexual experiences with painstaking caution. But now, with Beast’s volatile state, even the slightest lapse could mean Marinah’s death. It wasn’t a risk I could take. She would be leaving soon, and distance was the safest course of action. The bigger question was how I would move forward with the Federation.

I had already accepted that I wouldn’t be killing her. I liked Marinah, just as I had liked her father. She was sincere, but her belief that she could prevent the Federation from betraying us again was naive at best. She was wrong, and deep down, I thought she knew it.

The engine’s roar echoed through the coastal air as I rode, letting the miles slip away beneath me. Without intending to, I found myself pulling up to Cabel’s house. Human workers in the surrounding fields paused to wave as I passed. It was a stark contrast to the wary stares and hostility that had greeted us when we first arrived. It was a scenario I was determined not to repeat. These people were under our protection, and all my warriors took it seriously.

Cabel was in the front field, training a group of human men. Most of them were either indigenous or had roots that traced back to the people who had lived here long before the Spaniards. These men had fought us in the beginning, defending their land and their people, and though human lives had been lost, we had made a point of keeping casualties as low as possible. Cooperation, not conquest, had been our goal.

They had come to trust us, though it hadn’t happened overnight. Tyranny was something they understood all too well, and we had proved early on that we weren’t here to repeat their history. We had earned their respect by sharing the load. During harvest, my warriors worked the fields alongside them, asking for nothing we wouldn’t do ourselves. Word spread, and soon others emerged from hiding, seeking the safety of our alliance.

These people had endured horrors most couldn’t fathom. The cities had been hit the hardest, their dense populations offering little chance for escape. The first wave of attacks had devastated their urban centers, leaving only one human in twenty as a survivor. After they learned that hellhounds could tear through dirt and concrete, they had retreated into metal-lined bunkers originally designed to withstand bombings.

The genetically modified formaldehyde that had created the hellhounds hadn’t stopped at U.S. borders. Bodies shipped back to Cuba for burial had carried the contamination, unleashing the monsters here as well. But Cuba hadn’t faced the same overwhelming numbers that had decimated the U.S., and that difference was the only reason any humans had survived on the island at all.

Now, they needed us as much as we needed them. Together, we had managed to carve out a fragile existence in the face of unrelenting danger. It was a tenuous balance, but one that gave us a chance, if only we could hold it.

Without us, they would have eventually succumbed to starvation or been picked off by the hounds when they ventured out to plant crops. Peace had come only when we had proved ourselves by providing food, shelter, and safety.

Now, many of our warriors spoke both English and Spanish, and our lives had become deeply intertwined. Their women had even mated with Shadow Warriors, creating bonds that blurred the lines between our two groups. Someday, when this war was truly over, we would help them establish their own governing body and hand back control of the island. For now, their help was vital as we prepared for the battles to come. Questions about who was in charge couldn’t be entertained. While we might distrust the Federation, the U.S. was still our home, and one day, we hoped to return.

Cabel lowered his sword and walked toward me, his face glistening with sweat. “I didn’t expect you back so soon,” he said in greeting.

“I didn’t expect to be,” I admitted, leaving the bike idling as I tried to figure out what had drawn me here. “It’s good to see you training.”

He wiped his brow with the back of his hand and gestured toward the house. “It’s hotter than usual today. I’ll give the men a break if you want to come inside where it’s cooler.”

I shut off the engine and swung my leg over the bike, standing for a moment to scan the field and the workers moving in the heat. We walked the fifty or so yards to his house, and I noticed Mary, his mate, standing at the stove, stirring a large pot. As I took a seat at the table, her glare was unmistakable.

Beast rumbled at her audacity, his displeasure simmering just beneath the surface. I pulled him back, keeping him in check.

Cabel tried to smooth things over with a casual laugh. “It’s okay, Mar. It was only a small love tap. He wouldn’t hurt me.” He gave her a quick hug and kissed her cheek, but the tension lingered.

I knew better than to provoke his Beast by showing his wife any interest. Mating rage was unpredictable, and we had all learned to tread lightly around newly mated couples. Even after years of being off the farm, allowing our human side to rule, we were still figuring out the balance when it came to mating. Caution was the only answer.

From the corner of my eye, I watched Cabel circle Mary, grabbing two glasses from the cupboard. When he moved to fill them at the sink, she stepped in, taking the glasses from his hands. He shrugged, relenting with the easy patience of a man who knew better than to argue with his mate, and returned to the table, sitting across from me. A moment later, she set water in front of him first, then me; a clear sign of her husband’s importance over mine.

I didn’t reach out to take the glass from her, mindful of the danger even a brief touch could cause. Cabel’s fingers tightened around his glass when she stepped too close, and I avoided her gaze, lowering mine to the table. She moved back to the stove without lingering

“Thank you,” I said quietly, hoping to earn a sliver of goodwill.

Cabel let out a low grumble but looked sheepish when I arched a brow at him. His eyes dropped to the table. “I updated you on the crops yesterday. Nothing’s changed. So, what brings you here?”

“Woman trouble,” I said, surprising us both by making the admission in front of his mate. For years, Cabel had been my go-to for all things Beast, human, and the mental complexities of dealing with both. It had been hard to do without him, and Beck was not exactly someone you shared personal insights with.

Cabel caught on quickly and arched an eyebrow. “The Federation woman?”

“Yes, that woman. She’s not what I expected, and she’s nothing like you’d think Church’s daughter would be.”

“How so?”

“She can’t walk a straight line without tripping. I’ve got her training with Boot to keep her out of my way. Maybe it’ll give her a small chance if she ever has to fight. I’m not holding my breath on that front.” I took a sip from my glass, my gaze shifting to the door. “The bigger issue is Beast. He doesn’t like her.”

“Hmm. But you do?” he asked, his skepticism clear.

I raked my fingers through my braids and regretted it instantly. This gesture was a tell, a sign of indecision, and not something I was known for. I made solid, quick decisions. I didn’t fidget. Running my hand over the facial scar was different and it showed that I was willing to consider both sides when warranted.

“I like her, even though I don’t want to,” I finally said.

“Then why doesn’t your Beast agree?”

“That’s the problem, isn’t it? I have no idea. And it’s not just dislike. He wants her dead.” I wondered why I was even saying this out loud. “Then there’s the issue of trusting her enough to let her go back to the Federation.”

At those words, Beast gave his trademark rib-cracking growl. I kept my expression neutral. No way was I letting Cabel see my internal struggle. Pushing Beast back, I let my hand drift to my shoulder, absently rubbing the ache.

“You’re injured.”

“Bite.” I lowered my arm, brushing it off. “Found five hellhounds last night. They’re surfacing faster. We’ll need to increase patrols. Make sure your men are aware.”

“We took one out last night.”

I nodded, unsurprised. Cuba had a grim history. Castro had executed thousands, and the regimes before him had been responsible for hundreds of thousands more. It was only a matter of time before we confronted the reality of mass graves. Helping the Federation wouldn’t resolve our challenges here, but isolation wasn’t a long-term solution either. We knew there were survivors scattered across the globe, and even in the U.S., there were people who had avoided government aid.

“If we can forge alliances with the humans on the outskirts,” I said, “we might be able to keep the Federation in check and avoid the risk of another war between us.”

Cabel considered my words, but he remained silent.

“I’m thinking of sending a hundred Warriors to the U.S. with Marinah.”

“That’s a low number,” he remarked, scratching his chin thoughtfully.

“They don’t know how many we have, and I don’t want to tip our hand. For now, the fewer the better.” Saying it out loud felt right, like pieces of a puzzle clicking into place. I hadn’t gotten the information I needed from our man inside the Federation, and I had to face the fact that it might not happen. Beck tended to bluster and needed time to process ideas before coming around. Cabel, on the other hand, listened and provided sound advice. Right now, I just needed to think aloud and work through the possibilities before bringing a decision to my council.

I glanced at him. “If married life hasn’t made you too soft, maybe you’d like to pick up a sword and remind me you’re not entirely wimpy yet.”

Cabel’s eyes flicked to mine, then slid away, a slow grin spreading across his face. “I think I’ll take you up on that. With your bum shoulder, I might actually stand a chance.”

“Not in hell,” I replied, standing up. “Thanks for the water, Mary. I’ll return your man in one piece.”

She smirked; her English laced with a heavy accent. “You never know. He might send you back in several pieces.”

Cabel and I laughed as we headed out the door.