Page 33 of Shades of You (Calypso Key #4)
Chapter Thirty-Three
Brenna
A sense of déjà vu filled me as I stepped inside Island Breeze Bistro. Months had passed since I was last here, and so much had changed since that day Knox hurt my arm at the farmer’s market. Yet the retro diner hadn’t changed at all, same black-and-white tile floor, same red booths with cracked upholstery. As I slid into a booth, the comforting scent of hot French fries wafted over to me. Harper arrived moments later and scooted in across from me. We each ordered chocolate milkshakes and handed our menus back to the server.
I was at a loss as to how to mend things with Hunter. He was right about needing to meet my family, yet I couldn’t be confident the meeting wouldn’t turn into World War III. And after the meeting Harper and I had shared with our brothers, I wasn’t sure about that at all. She still had plenty of doubts too but was true to her word to be my shoulder to lean on, and she agreed to meet me here to discuss things further .
“I expected resistance from Eli, but I kind of thought Austin and Braden would be a little more positive about Hunter,” I said with a frown.
Harper traced a condensation ring on the table with her finger, her gaze distant. “They’re like me, Brenna. We all just want you to be happy. And… they have their doubts about Hunter.”
A pang struck me at her words, the same doubt echoing in my own heart. But it was still a jolt to hear it voiced so plainly. “Same old story.” When our milkshakes arrived, I took a long pull of the icy sweetness.
“Look”—Harper reached across the table to give my hand a reassuring squeeze—“we’ve got the most protective brothers on earth. And Hunter is setting off big-time alarm bells for them.”
“And for you.”
She shrugged but didn’t reply, just drank her milkshake. That was all the answer I needed. “I get that this situation is complicated and that Hunter is too.” I understood that both of us had a part in building the fence that now stood between us. Me in feeling like I was choosing him or my family, and Hunter needing to overthrow the demons that had tormented him for over a decade. I’d thought he was well on the way to that until our argument, and his phone call to me early this morning hadn’t settled anything either.
Harper’s eyes locked onto mine with such intensity it felt like she was trying to decipher my soul. “How serious has this relationship gotten, Brenna?”
I took another drink of my shake. The liquid courage did little to untangle the knot in my throat. “I love him.”
“Oh dear.” Harper leaned back, a frown creasing her forehead. “Even with all the… baggage?”
“So what?” My fingers traced the beads of water on the cold metal shake container. “He gets me, Harper. In a way no one else has.”
“I’m guessing Knox didn’t get you.”
“Definitely not.” I let out a half-snort, half-sigh. “Knox never did understand why I love books so much. It was always ‘Why do you need to have a book all the time? Let’s go out.’ But Hunter”—a smile tugged at my lips despite the turmoil inside me—“he’d ask what story had captured me today, then sit down and read with me.”
“Really?” She looked intrigued now, leaning forward, elbows on the table.
“Yes.” I thought back to the nights Hunter and I spent curled up on the couch, lost in separate novels, yet together in silent camaraderie. How he would listen, really listen, when I raved about a character or plot twist. And how we exploded together in the bedroom—another area where he understood me like no one else ever had.
“Knox wanted me to be someone I’m not. But Hunter dives into my world with me. He doesn’t just tolerate my passions, he shares them. That’s rare, Harper. It’s special.”
I drummed my fingers on the table, the worn white Formica tabletop beneath them representing a familiar comfort. My mind was adrift, trying to think of ways to help Hunter heal his wounds. And knowing that I couldn’t—he and Evan had to do that themselves. And until that happened, the twisting knot in my stomach told me Hunter would never emerge from the shadows.
“Are you saying the rumors about Hunter are wrong? That he didn’t leave town after almost killing Evan only to move on to… worse things?” Harper’s words were soft, searching.
“Hunter’s been through hell and back. The accident… he’d just graduated from high school! And Evan wasn’t mu ch older. Everyone that age thinks they’re invincible. And his time with the Marines? God, Harper, he saw things you and I can’t even imagine. He had to make decisions that had life-and-death consequences. So yeah. All of that left a mark on him.”
“But is he stuck there?”
“I don’t know.” Fear gnawed at my insides. “He called me this morning.” After days of nothing—from both our sides—I’d been happy to hear his deep voice. But our conversation had quickly deteriorated to a rehash of the other day. “It didn’t go well. And I told him we can’t be together until he works through his problems. But he’s got a point too—with my hesitancy about him meeting you guys. So the upshot is we’re talking a little but not getting anywhere.”
Harper shot me a small smile, as if she couldn’t help it. “But he reached out to you, right? That says something.”
I nodded. “He cares, but I don’t know if he’ll ever stop fighting his feelings. Sometimes I think he’s here with me, really here. But other times, there’s this distance, a barrier I’m not sure either of us knows how to dismantle. His past.”
“And where does that leave you?”
I met her gaze, finding an echo of my own turmoil reflected there. “I’m afraid of being trapped there with him. And it’s all tied up with his accident with Evan. This morning, he told me he and Evan were actually talking through things, and that has to be a good sign. But they’ve been estranged for so long, and I don’t want to wait in limbo while they work out their problems.” I didn’t mention his lost love. That felt too private, but I suspected she was part of this awful mixture of dread too.
“Have you told him this?” Harper pressed, her probing eyes searching mine .
“I don’t know how.”
“You realize you can’t change him, right?”
I slumped in my seat. “I know that. I really do. And what makes this so hard is that it isn’t just about Hunter and me. Entire families are involved!” Frustrated, I dragged a hand through my hair. “I wanted us—Hunter and me—to be a bridge between our families. To show all of you that old grudges don’t have to dictate our lives.”
“I know you did, honey.”
“And I can’t believe that Ben—” I laughed without humor. “Ben!—is the one who has been sympathetic.” I huffed and rolled my tight shoulders. At our little family meeting, Ben had been the only one openly willing to give Hunter a chance. “If Ben’s the only ally we have, maybe that’s a sign. Maybe Hunter and I are just… tempting fate.”
My sister winced. “I don’t want you to get hurt, Bren! I don’t think any of us feel hatred toward the Markhams anymore. Too much time has gone by. It’s more the particular Markham you’re involved with…”
My face flushed with heat, a mixture of anger and defense swelling within me. “See, that’s what’s pissing me off about all this! You’re making a rash judgment about Hunter without having truly met him. And that’s exactly what people have done to us Coleridges for as long as I can remember.”
“Maybe there’s some truth to that,” she conceded, taking a drink of milkshake.
Pursing my lips together, my frustration boiled over. “And yet, I’m afraid if I bring him to the resort, a brawl will break out! You want to know what else he said? Hunter told me he’d never let his family treat me poorly. That if my meeting with them had gotten ugly, he would have put a stop to it. Can you understand how shitty that makes me feel? That I can’t automatically say the same thing back to him?”
Harper stared at me evenly, then arched a brow. “But it’s easier for him to say that, isn’t it? He’s been estranged from them for over a decade.”
She had a point, but defensive heat seared through me. I was about to give her a sharp retort when my phone buzzed against the wooden table. Hunter’s name lit up the screen, and my heart stuttered.
My consternation must have shown because Harper’s forehead grew lined. “Everything okay?”
“Uh, yeah,” I mumbled, thumbing the message open. Hunter’s words scrolled across the screen, simple yet weighted with emotion. “Hunter just texted me.”
Hunter: I miss you, and I’m sorry about this morning. Hope to see you at the championship game tomorrow.
My fingers hovered above the keypad. What was I supposed to say to that? I couldn’t tell him how much I missed him, how much just seeing a simple text gave me hope. Not when so much was in the air. I read his words out loud.
“Are you going to reply?” Harper’s question nudged me back to reality, though I wasn’t sure where that was anymore.
“I don’t know what to say. We have so much to settle, and it’s too much to put into a text. I need more time.” I stared at the phone in my hand, my heart thumping away.
Harper’s gaze was patient but insistent. “How do you feel about going to the game?”
The image of Hunter standing on that baseball diamond, eyes searching the crowd for a face he hoped to see—mine—flashed before me. My stomach churned. “It’s the championship, so I’d love to be there for him. But…”
Harper cocked her head to one side, considering me. “You’ve seen changes in him, haven’t you?”
I nodded. “He’s not the same guy who left all those years ago. He’s really trying to move forward.”
Harper smiled. “If there’s one thing about you, Brenna, it’s your knack for seeing the best in people. Even when they can’t see it themselves.”
Her words should have comforted me, but instead, they added weight to the decision I needed to make. Was I seeing the best in Hunter, or was I clinging to a hopeful illusion? Groaning, I rubbed my eyes with my palms. “This is a huge mess.”
“Look at me, Brenna.” I lowered my hands to stare at her. “Are you miserable because you’re not with Hunter? Or because of all those complications he brings?”
I sighed, letting the sounds of the diner fill the brief silence. “I don’t know. That’s the problem.”
“Then listen to your heart. It hasn’t steered you wrong yet.”
When we left the restaurant, the humidity seeped into my bones. We walked to the parking lot, and I leaned against the door of my car. “Thanks for listening.”
“Of course. Trust your gut on this, Bren.” Harper gave me a half-hug, her presence always steady when I felt adrift. She stepped back, and I watched her retreat to her own car before slipping into the driver’s seat of mine. My phone’s screen cast a pale glow as I held it. For a long moment, I stared at Hunter’s message, reading his words over and over.
I missed him horribly. There was no use pretending otherwise. But could I stand beside him, come what may? My thumbs hovered over the keyboard before they began to move with a will of their own.
Brenna: I miss you too. Good luck at the game.
Sending it felt like casting a bottle into the ocean, uncertain if the message would reach the shore or be swallowed by the waves. But I couldn’t promise I’d be there, not when my heart was still so uncertain. I needed to think this through, and I only had a day to do it.