Page 11

It takes the nurses several minutes to calm me down when I wake up. Three of them had to pry the scalpel from my hands and another to assure me that I was safe and in the infirmary.

Sunlight peeks through the barred windows, reflecting in stripes off of the tiled floor. A single row of unoccupied beds line the opposite wall. Dust gathers around the chair next to my bed, legs scuffed and scratched on the floor like someone had jerked it back and forth over and over again.

When I sit up again, the nurse pushes me back down again with a firm hand. “Hang on, Kinsley. You’re still under evaluation. You inhaled a lot of smoke.”

Smoke?

The words slam into me just as quickly as the searing pain in my chest. I claw at the bandages frantically, searching for the bullet lodged into my skin. Pain spiders out from each place I touch until my entire torso aches, screaming for relief until the nurse pulls my hands away.

“You’re making it worse,” she reprimands. “Calm down, please. I don’t want to restrain you again.”

I don’t have a moment to process what she meant by ‘again’, or think about how long I’ve been unconscious. When my eyes land on my clothes neatly folded in the corner, my face turns a ghostly white.

They’re bloody, dried stains from Sara’s body that brand my fatigues. Resting on top of it is the vest she gave me—her vest—with a bullet lodged directly in the center and carved around it is a star resting inside of a circle.

The Codex.

The door swings open seconds later, Bane storming in with his eyes glued to the clipboard in his hands.

“How is she?” he says, aggravation lacing his voice.

The nurse glances at me, pursing her lips together. “She’s awake.”

His head snaps up so quickly his clipboard falls to the ground. Another flash crosses his face before it disappears, hardening into something just as unsettling.

“That’ll be all, Carlisle,” he orders.

She gives me one last look before hurrying out of the room and it becomes just as silent the moment the doors slam shut.

Tension coils in my chest the longer he doesn’t speak. Even though Bane stuck his neck out for me before, this was different. I was prepared to give my life to prove my devotion to Bane, to my country. I failed in delivering him the intel, of following orders. I failed in killing the Codex.

I should’ve ran.

Bane looks at me for a long moment, and then smiles, placing a hand on my thigh.

“How are you?” he asks.

It’s a test. If Bane found me, he found everything else too.

“I was shot,” I mumble.

He nods. “Because you didn’t listen to me.”

Heat burns in my cheeks and my eyes fall to the clipboard as he snatches it from the ground. Pages upon pages detail my injuries, the star carved into my vest, the bruises on my sternum and severe damage to my lungs from the smoke.

“You took a hell of a beating, child,” he says. “They found casings of .50 cal rifle rounds on the site.” He points to my vest. “That was a .22. I don’t think you understand how lucky you are.”

I stare at the small round bullet embedded into my vest. My eyebrows pinch together, but he’s right. The rifle Castor pinned me with could have easily pierced my armor.

Why shoot me with a .22?

“We had to move several bodies before we found you,” Bane continues. “The others were torn apart by those rounds and they laid you on top of their bodies with that carved into your chest, like it was a message for us.” He sits in the chair, the metal legs screeching as they scuff along the floor. “They left you alive. You, the only one who wasn’t supposed to be there.”

The room darkens as the sun dips behind a cloud, shadowing the contours of Bane’s jaw, the hollows of his eyes and the bright amber that would stare at me so brightly is filled with darkness as he throws a photo of the scene onto my lap.

“Why did they leave you alive?” he demands.

I don’t look at the photo. I can’t bring myself to do it again, not when I can still see the memories of dragging my best friend underneath tree branches, so the Codex couldn’t touch her body. Still, his voice makes my insides curl and a sick feeling builds in my throat.

“You think they did this on purpose?” I say in disbelief.

“You were ordered to stay on base,” Bane says sharply. “You were never supposed to be there, Helena.”

He blows out a harsh breath, rubbing the bulging vein on his temple. “You’ve always been a good girl. You knew I held you back to keep you safe. Why didn’t you listen? Did something happen?”

The bile sticks to my throat even as I try to choke it down, but my silence only brings a knowing look from Bane.

“Anderson.” I shake my head. “I don’t know what he told you–”

“He said enough,” Bane cuts in. “I saw the rest.”

My eyes flick up to him, a beat of hope making my heart stutter.

“I heard your threats to Anderson,” he continues. “You assaulted a superior officer and abandoned your post. Anderson showed me how you bashed his head in with his gun, and when he tried to bring you back in, you handcuffed him inside your holding cell. Do you understand the consequences for that?”

My jaw falls open, shock freezing me. Anderson has always been fucked in the head, but he never could’ve gone to this length.

My hands clasp at the sheets, gripping tightly until my knuckles turn white and it doesn’t begin to touch the budding panic swirling in my head.

“That’s a lie,” I try to say calmly. “I only hit Anderson once.”

“I don’t give a fuck if you hit him once or if you sent the entire platoon after him. You can’t assault your superior officers, Helena.”

“I didn’t!” I shriek. “I was defending myself! Anderson grabbed me. He was going to—”

“Do not interrupt me!” he booms.

My mouth clamps shut and he laughs, rubbing a hand down his face in irritation.

“Anderson’s involvement is irrelevant. The Codex never leaves survivors. Why did they let you live?”

I sigh, slamming my head against the pillow.

“I don’t know,” I huff. “One of them ambushed me. He wanted something from me. Some kind of information. He kept asking me for my name.”

“Which would have been safe if you’d followed orders and stayed at base.”

I take in deep breaths. “Sir, I was acting on your orders. You wanted me to lead this extract. You brought me back.”

“And look where that got us!” The chair screeches back as he stands abruptly, smacking against the steel door. “Twice now I’ve trusted you with responsibilities to lead missions and twice now, you’ve managed to kill every single one of your subordinates. Was your pride worth killing Lt. Nadir?”

My breath stalls, a blow to my chest.

“I would never–”

“Shut your fucking mouth of I’ll have you restrained!” He booms.

My mouth clamps shut, waves of despair and embarrassment smacking into me over and over again. Sara. My superior. My best friend. That wasn’t my fault. I didn’t do this. I would never hurt her. I wouldn’t…

He huffs, leaning against the metal frame of the bed. He places two fingers to his temple, massaging the bulging vein.

“I’m discharging you,” he says abruptly.

My eyes bug.

“What?”

“You fucked up.” He laughs humorlessly. “You assaulted a military officer with a weapon, abandoned your post, trespassed on a mission you were not authorized to and compromised their position which led to the deaths of forty troops. I can’t cover for you this time.”

The door opens and Alastor appears a second later, with Anderson at his side.

I stand, grabbing Bane’s arm as I plead.

“Bane, he’s lying. Anderson was going to hurt me. I was defending myself, I swear. Please.”

Bane narrows his eyes. “Don’t beg, Helena. I trained you better than that.”

He nods towards Anderson and my hands are ripped from his uniform and clasped behind me.

“There’s nothing I can do,” he says, raising his hands like he hasn’t just ordered my arrest. “You can plead your case in court.”

The metal bites into my skin, digging into my wrists as Anderson tightens them before he and Alastor escort me out of the room.

The cell they move me to is different—a stiff outdoor hut of concrete at the very far corner of the outpost. There’s no door, only a small slab carved inside the small room where I’m handcuffed to.

I can’t think. I can’t breathe. I can’t choke out a fucking sob like I’ve wanted to do since I found that omen in the forest. My hands are numb and the coolness of the concrete bench transports me back to my therapist’s sterile office, locked against the leather couch. At least there, it looked warm and inviting. This place is Hell—an endless repeat of your worst mistakes, conjured up in new ways and giving you hope only long enough to rip it away again.

I saw it. I know it was real. Death was real. Anderson was going to hurt me if I didn’t stop him. The Codex set me up to take the fall. They had to…right?

I grip my hair with my free hand. What am I doing? Is everything I see a hallucination? Are these handcuffs even fucking real?

I tug at them. The metal bites into my skin, causing a sharp sting to run up my arm.

They feel real.

I tug at it again, another bolt of pain. Death felt real. My dad felt real.

Again and again, I tug at the cuff. The sting runs deep into my bones until a ring of blood pools around my wrist, but I don’t stop. Maybe if I pull hard enough, it’ll take me back to Dr. Morgan. Maybe I’ll wake up and he can tell me I’m being crazy again, that I should’ve gone back to weekly sessions. Maybe the hallucinations will stop.

Blood drips onto the concrete, swirling around my feet, but I need more. More blood. More pain. I want to feel the pain. I want this.

No. That’s too easy.

The sound of soft footsteps jars me back to the present and I shift back until my back is pressed against the concrete wall. Anderson appears a second later with a tray of food in his hands and a smirk on his face.

“Hungry?” He drops it on the floor before I can answer, kicking it towards me. Tomato paste spills out from the tray, drenching the already soggy and mishandled food.

A flash of blood makes me wince. Sara’s blood. Another flash, her head in my hands while I cry as she stops breathing.

She was never buried. I just left her there for the animals to find her.

“You really are crazy.” Anderson laughs, leaning against the stone archway. “And here I thought it was a front.”

My lips curl into a snarl. “The doctors said my PTSD is causing my delusions. What’s your excuse?”

He shrugs. “I’ve never been one to give up after a small misunderstanding. I’ll gladly tell the colonel the truth…” he steps closer, flashing me a wry smile. “...if you’re a little nicer this time around.”

I gag, making sure he can hear it before I laugh in his face.

“You threw several felonies in my face because you wanted to get your dick wet?”

He nods, not seeming to care for my disgust as his plump sausage fingers tuck a piece of hair behind my ear and inhales.

“Don’t act like you haven’t been thinking about this since you got back. I’ve seen how you look at me. Those little fuck-me eyes are asking for some attention.”

I fight down the bile bubbling in my throat.

Don’t do anything, Helena. He’s baiting you.

“I’m sorry if my existence in your vicinity made you think I had the slightest interest in you, but usually after a girl punches a guy in the nose, it means she’s not interested.”

“Or she’s playing hard to get.” He licks his lips, eyes raking over my body even as I cross my arms over my chest to hide from his stare. “Do we have a deal?”

I suck in a shaky breath. Bane is like a father to me. Even if I let him down, I know he’s only doing what’s right. But letting a man get close to me when he thinks consent is optional was a stupid fucking idea. I’ve only ever had sex once, and I’d sooner forget it than let Anderson get anywhere near me.

If he wants to touch me, he’ll do it with ten broken fingers.

I force a smile and his eyes light up, glazing with lust as he leans in to kiss me. I let him get closer before I throw my head against his and jam my elbow into his chest.

“A little word of advice, Anderson. If you’re going to hit on girls, maybe skip the blackmail and start by washing your ass first. I could smell you walking in the door.”

I brace myself for a fight that’s brewing in his eyes when he glares at me.

Instead he picks himself off the ground, chuckling to myself.

“I’m so glad they let me do this,” he mutters.

I flinch when he lifts the tray. Another flash—the glint of a gun like the .22 that lodged a message inside my chest. The message that cost me everything.

I squint, my hand flying to my face when the glint blinds me for another second.

That’s not a flashback…

The crack of the hammer pulling back on his concealed gun is just enough for me to dodge the shot that rings out seconds later. The bullet ricochets and strikes my cuffs, thrusting me back against the opposite wall.

Anderson curses and takes a step back, cocking the gun again just as I slam my body into his and the weapon clatters to the ground.

“Contact!” I shout as he scrambles to his feet. I find the gun, wrestling with the trigger, but he kicks me to the ground, sprinting out of the cell with his rifle.

“Pain spiders out from my middle, shocking up my ribcage until I cover it with my hand to dull the ache.

Another gunshot fires inside the cell, right where I was cuffed, and I flatten myself against the wall, just out of sight, where footsteps shuffle outside, marching in disorganized thuds while their weapons clang from all sides.

“Alert HQ. Target is armed.” Anderson’s faded voice calls out to the other unknown bodies.

I groan in pain, pressing deeper on my side, but it does little to stave off the bruise that’s quickly forming. Voices mumble outside of my cell, rambling and barking orders at each other, overlapping in a chaos of words that I can’t make out except for a single word.

Codex.

I fall to the ground, tucking my knees in until I’m concealed in the shadows. How many of my friends worked for the enemy?

Suddenly, Sara’s warning rings in my head and I curse under my breath.

She knew.

Of course she knew. Sara was one of the most intelligent people I’ve ever met. She strategized so well, it even frightened Bane, and I saw her hack into Bane’s graduation system in less than five minutes to change my marksman scores so I could earn a place in her unit.

My mind flares as the footsteps get closer, lining up outside the entrance and my only way out. Another bullet cracks, ricocheting off the walls as a single man charges inside. I duck and roll, covering my head in the corner of the room as the bullet bounces off the concrete.

“I’ve got her!” the man shouts as his gun clicks.

He raises it at me and my eyes pinch shut, preparing for the blow to come. The man grunts, gurgling sounds filling the air until his body collapses at my feet, with a pool of blood spread around him.

A relieved laugh falls from my lips when I see the bullet next to his body, fighting the urge to taunt Anderson back and dare him to fight me on equal terms now.

My hands wrap around the cool metal of the rifle, the grip molding into my hands like a warm hug. I wouldn’t deny Anderson a fight if he wants one so badly.

More angry whispers erupt outside my cell along with the scuffling of their rifles being loaded.

I steady my breathing as I flatten myself against the wall and out of sight, counting the footsteps and whispers seeping through the cracks of the concrete. Four… no, five. Five survivors from yesterday’s attack. Five traitors working for the Codex.

Five men who could kill Bane and Alastor.

A sharp inhale. Three are positioned right outside, two more flanking each side of the building. Their steps are erratic, nervous, their whispers frantic as they wait for Anderson to give orders.

I check the chamber—three bullets.

Fuck.

Anderson may be as good at leading as the dead bodies of my old unit, but they’re still marksmen, trained as I was, and all I have is three bullets and a dead body.

3 bullets.

Exhaling, I turn sharply, aiming through the blast of cold wind and fire. The man’s shout is cut off as the bullet pierces his skull and his body collapses in front of the two others.

2 bullets.

But only one of them hunted with me when I was a kid and he runs around the corner to avoid being shot while the other three erupt in panic.

“Kinsley!” Anderson shouts. “Get the fuck out, or I’ll kill you myself. You’ve got nowhere to run.”

“Come and get me then,” I mutter.

Bullets rip through the air around me. Anderson screams orders, maneuvering the men to try and hit me from inside the cell, but the bullets only bounce back outside my cell, making them scatter before trying again.

I wait, counting each of my breaths while they beat the concrete walls with metal and fire.

In. Out.

A click makes my eyes pop open and a smile breaks out when the others whisper in panic with the frantic clicks of empty ammunition chambers.

I move.

Wrapping my arm around the body of the corpse in front of me, I charge out the door, hurling the corpse at one soldier and then leaping on the other. My hands find his throat, and with a savage twist, I pull him backwards, wrenching his spine between my rifle and my knee. The sickening snap of bone reverberates and he crumples beside the man wrestling to throw the dead body off him.

He grips his gun, slamming it down on my shoulder just as I move back and narrowly miss a blow to the head.

I fall back on my knees, flipping myself forward just as he takes aim.

Click.

I smile.

“Gun’s still empty, asshole.” I yank out the knife hidden in the dead man’s boot and launch myself at him, sinking the blade into his throat before he can scream.

Two left.

I swing around just as another bullet cracks through the air.

“Mine’s not,” Anderson sneers.

The smoke of the gunshot billows in Anderson’s face, blowing back with the force of the frigid wind. It hardly masks the blood staining his temples or the other soldier trembling as he stands almost behind Anderson, eyes darting between the two of us.

Two traitors left.

I duck behind the two bodies and they open fire. Bullets pellet the three dead men, one of them grunting softly as it strikes his stomach, then his chest and his breath stalls.

I can’t hide behind these bodies forever. The bullets will go through them eventually.

When I move again, I sprint, ducking behind the cell with my rifle in hand and Anderson grabs the last soldier, using him for a shield as he fires again and again.

My eyes widen as I watch the soldier thrashing and cursing around his partner, but Anderson slams the gun against his temple and moves forward.

“Time’s up, Helena!” Anderson shouts. “You know I’m a better shot than you.”

I check the clip.

“Then why are you hiding?” I pant.

“Shut the fuck up! I’m sick of females telling me what to do. You’re not going to get out of this unless you learn your fucking place. If I say jump, you ask how high. If I say suck my dick, you open your goddamn mouth.” Another crack as the gun slams against the soldier’s temple. “Put down the gun, Helena. This only ends one way.”

Anderson’s voice crackles with an arrogant laugh. “If you do a good enough job, I might let you live.”

The wind sparks goosebumps on my skin, blowing so hard my rifle is almost knocked from my hands. It isn’t strong enough to pierce through two bodies, not confidently, but enough bullets and maybe some of them will pierce Anderson too.

I shut my eyes, exhaling.

In. Out.

I throw myself around the corner and squeeze the trigger. Bullets fire rapidly, pelting the screaming man even as Anderson paces around me to keep himself from being hit. Several bullets in the man’s torso until the last one strikes Anderson in the chest and they both collapse, limp and lifeless.

The bodies around me are a grotesque mass of blood and bone, quickly turning blue from the frigid temperatures. A flash pulls me back to the desert—the first time I saw my team dead at my feet, just like this, but this is different. They were all working against me. Every single one.

I sprint back towards the remaining officers, a glimmer of hope budding in my chest as Alastor exits the building.

“Would you five knock it off?” he growls. “If you idiots are playing Russian roulette again—” He freezes, eyes widening as they land on me. “Kinsley? What are you doing out of your cell?”

I yank him behind the briefing room, pressing a finger to my lips. It’s deathly quiet. The shots echo loudly in my ears like the beating war drums, thundering through the whistling wind that barely tunes out the ringing in my ears.

“They’re buddyfuckers.” I discard my empty rifle, peering out the edge before pulling him around to the back entrance. “I knew something was up, but I didn’t think Anderson was smart enough to do something like this.”

“What is happening right now?” He rasps. “How did you get out of your cell?”

“Anderson is working for the Codex. He almost killed me.” I tug at the bloodied silver cuff around my wrist until it snaps free. “I don’t know how many more could be coming, but our position is compromised. We need to move.”

Alastor sighs in exasperation, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” He huffs.

My gaze hardens and I point to the thick of the trees, the dirt road we followed that lead us here. “Major, you and the colonel take top priority. We need to evacuate, now. The embassy can give us sanctuary.”

Alastor glances at me for a long moment before he nods and follows me out along the outskirts of the base.

I keep him in my sights, covering him with my rifle as I round each building carefully. My heart pounds in my ears, adrenaline surging like oxygen to a fire, and slowly, more bodies become visible. Everyone left on base has been slaughtered to unrecognizable pieces. Blood stains the grass and dirt until the entire outpost is black, decorated with the bodies of the ones who stayed behind, but when I clear the last building, the motion sensored light switches on, illuminating the corner of the base where my cell was located.

Four bodies lay sprawled across the field. The fifth is nothing but a trail of blood leading into the forest.

Shit.

“Anderson’s gone,” I say through gritted teeth.

Alastor moves alongside me, glancing at the four bodies, stiff and cold. Both bodies fell when I shot them. The others I felt die with my own hands. I’d assumed Anderson met the same fate.

“He can’t have gone far, but we need to regroup where it’s safe.” I glance at the rest as he checks the others. Pieces of brain matter, blood and bone are splattered around the field, turning the green a deep shade of blackened crimson.

Alastor turns to me, in his hands, four chains dangle in them. Dog tags. He pockets them, and his hand wraps around my shoulder.

“Thank you, Helena. I’ll take it from here.” He gives me a smile and then slams his elbow into my face.

Pain explodes around my nose, searing up into my watering eyes while Alastor drags me back inside the cell.

The ground collides with my head, another blow that brings the ringing in my ears back with a vengeance so I almost miss the sheer pull of the silver grenade pin as he tosses it inside.

I react on instinct, pulling one of the dead bodies over my exposed body just as it explodes and consumes the cell with fire and smoke.

The walls around me crumble and the concrete chips around my shoulders, groaning from the force of the blast. The body is a blackened mass, burned down to bare bones and the clothes that nearly turn to ash in my hands as I drop it.

What the fuck just happened?

Aggravation and confusion war against the throbbing of my head, and I can’t think of anything aside from the single word repeated to me over and over again.

Run.

Another shattering boom sends me scrambling for cover. One after the other, bombs ignite, lighting the others next to it as the center of the camp is set ablaze. Buildings crumble and shatter in front of me until the entire base is consumed in a ball of black smoke, sweet and sickening with the decay of the dead bodies caught inside until it falls to ash and rubble.

I fall to my knees, clapping a hand over my mouth as the scene clears. The briefing room is the only source of light in the pitch black, alight with bright orange fire. It casts an eerie orange glow over the field, just enough to illuminate Alastor’s face as he drives away.

Alastor.

The racing thoughts in my mind halt, freezing into place while I watch him drive away. It’s branded into my brain, pulling out memories of his desperation to move from his security network to Bane’s unit just before the disaster in Syria, how he clings to Bane’s side, attached like a parasite, and he recoiled when the files were set down on the table of three men. Baron, Castor, and the faceless entity no one has seen. Fury.

Alastor.

I want to slam my head against the remains of the concrete cell for being so naive. Alastor set me up. He was the one coordinating everything. It was staring me in the face and I still took orders from him, looking up to him like the obedient little girl I was when I first joined, all while he hovered over me and Bane, watching us like a vulture waiting for us to drop dead, hiding in the shadows with his dark eyes and eerie smile.

I press a hand to my face. How did I miss this many red flags?

Please, tell me I won’t be this stupid the next time I meet someone.

Fire crackles around the buildings, spitting and snapping embers while I walk around the outskirts. The bodies are charred, the sickly sweet smell enough to make my stomach churn and my legs pick up the pace to scan each of the faces until the weight in my chest lifts and a wave of relief makes me laugh.

Bane isn’t here.

The roads are singed and trees lay broken off, only Alastor’s tracks visible through the ash. Bane isn’t here, which means he could be hiding.

Or Alastor could have him.

I shake the thought. If Alastor wanted to kill Bane, he would’ve left him here. He wouldn’t keep him captive. Bane would’ve outsmarted him.

He’s alive and he’s in the woods right now with Alastor. The embassy may only be a few days walk from here, cordoned off by military personnel and much higher security. He’ll be safe there.

I could go home. I could tell the truth about what really happened, about who Alastor is, what Anderson did. I could exonerate myself.

The thought strikes me in the center of my chest—going home. Being safe. I can clear my name for Syria, for this base, and I can finally rest.

But another thought hits harder. Alastor is still out there, hunting Bane, joining the Codex. The three men who murdered my dad and tried to kill me too.

I glance back at the smoldering flames of the building and the destroyed road hidden underneath the brush, leading to my freedom and the dark forest in the opposite direction where Alastor took off.

Bane is alive. He doesn’t know what his brother is.

I turn and sprint into the forest.