Page 26

Chapter 26

Gabi

I pull the soft, pastel fabrics from the rack, envisioning how they'll drape over my body once the baby arrives. Each piece I consider feels like a small step towards reclaiming a version of myself that I’ve tucked away since the moment I got pregnant, but more importantly...

Since the moment I accepted this job with the Blades. Since the moment I started that fake engagement with Jacob.

Since the moment I let him into my heart, my bed.

Shopping used to be a fun, relaxing activity for me. Now it feels like another task to add to my never-ending list of responsibilities and secrets.

I sigh as I realize that my growing bump won't fit into the slim dresses and tailored suits I used to wear for work. The worry that I'll never be the woman I once was creeps in, and I fight back tears.

But then I remember the reason for all of this.

The tiny life growing inside of me—a constant reminder that no matter what happens with Jacob or my brother or my job, there is something more important at stake.

I take a deep breath and continue sorting through the clothes, determined to find pieces that will fit my new body when my phone buzzes, jolting me back into reality.

My intern's name flashes across my screen.

I close my eyes, praying for strength before answering what I know will be another crisis that the twenty-two-year-old can't handle.

"Hello?"

"Miss De Luca?"

"Yes, Sophie."

“Hi, I’m so sorry to bother you again, but I think I messed up the press release for the charity event. I… um, I still can’t figure out the printer. And I, uh, sent the wrong version to the team."

The words rush out, each tumbling out over one another like they’re racing against time. I can almost picture her chewing on her lip, the way she does when she's nervous, which, since I met her, has been all the time.

"Take a deep breath, Sophie. We’ll sort this out. Just send me what you have, and I’ll handle it."

"Oh, and I sent out the statement about you and Mr. Walker, refuting the fake engagement claims. Was that okay?"

"It's fine, Sophie. Thank you for handling it."

"Okay, great! By the way, I talked to Evan Daniels again..."

"Uh oh. What now? Did the goalie mention anything about having to engage in mind-numbing interviews again?" I shake my head, grateful for the brief distraction from my own thoughts.

"No, but he did have a few words to speak up on behalf of you and Mr. Walker."

I stop. "He did?"

"Yeah. He said as a single dad, he knows the importance of keeping private relationships out of the spotlight. He said you and Mr. Walker have a right to your privacy and that any member of the media who tries to pry into personal matters is crossing a line. He also said, and I quote, ‘If the press wants to dig into Gabi and Jacob’s life, they might want to think twice. They wouldn’t like the kind of attention that comes along with a few broken knees’."

My eyes widen as I hold the phone closer to my ear, not wanting to miss a word. "Did he really say that?"

"Yeah, I couldn’t believe it either. But he sounded dead serious." She hesitates. "He's actually a pretty okay guy once you get to know him."

Evan Daniels has been described as a lot of things, but "pretty okay guy" has never been one of them. Grouchy, yes. No-nonsense, definitely.

But for some reason, the pitch in Sophie's voice tells me that the “okay” parts that Sophie notices about Evan might have to do more with his hazel eyes and six-foot-something frame than with his personality.

I smile. "Well, we'll have to thank Mr. Daniels when we get a chance."

"Yes," Sophie exhales out breathily. "I'd say." Clearing her throat suddenly, she shifts gears. "Lastly, your grandmother called. From the hospital."

"Is she okay?"

"She's fine. Worried about you, though. She says she's been trying to get in touch with you for the last few hours, but couldn't reach you."

"I've had my phone on silent," I reply automatically, my mind already spinning at the thought of my beloved grandmother still being in the hospital.

"She wants you to visit her tomorrow afternoon if possible. She said the hospital won't let her have vodka...and Shera's no help. Who's Shera?"

"Shera is my Nonna's very capable, very terrified nurse. Who absolutely needs a raise. And I'll definitely visit tomorrow."

"Good." Sophie sounds relieved, and I realize my Nonna's nurse isn't the only one terrified of Nonna Chiara. "I'm sure she'll appreciate it."

"Is that all?"

"Uh, yes..." Sophie hesitates on the phone, and I can practically hear her bottom lip being chewed to shreds.

"Sophie, what is it?"

"It's just...I might not be my place to say this, but..."

"But what?"

"But I...saw Mr. Walker walking through the Blades offices this morning. I've never seen him look so down. He looked like he was auditioning for a part in a sad movie. Honestly." She blows out a breath. "I swear, if he had a little rain cloud following him around like a cartoon character, it wouldn’t have surprised me. I mean, the guy is usually all about a sense of humor and a charming smile. It was like watching a peacock transform into a sad little pigeon. I just couldn't help but think maybe someone should gift him a puppy or, you know, a nice ice cream cone to cheer him up."

"Well, if he were a five-year-old, I'd agree with you on the ice cream cone. But thanks for letting me know."

"I'm just saying..." Sophie talks fast now. "I think if anyone can make him feel better, it's you."

"Ah, Sophie. Jacob will be just fine in my absence for now. He has his teammates, a playoff game coming up, and a whole lot of talent to keep him busy." I swallow. "Trust me. I've never known him to be the type to wallow."

"But he is. Wallowing, that is. And all the charming smiles and jokes and laughs seem okay. But with you...he's..." She pauses. "I don't know. He laughs harder. He smiles wider. Every time your name comes up, he just...lights up. The guy seems to orbit around you. Like you're the sun or something. I don't know if you noticed, but even when he's in the middle of a hockey game, he's always scanning the crowd for you. The moment he finds you, he just...relaxes. It's weird and I feel like a stalker admitting it, but...it's true. It's nice. To see a man love a woman that much."

I feel my cheeks flush at her words.

I didn't realize Jacob's feelings were that obvious to others. Hell, had they ever been obvious to me? Jacob basically had to spell his feelings out before I managed even a smidge of belief in them.

Or maybe I hadn't wanted to see it. Hadn't wanted to acknowledge that maybe Jacob was changing all along. That maybe there's always been more to him than just the jokes and smiles and charming persona.

I take a deep breath and force myself to push those thoughts aside. This conversation with Sophie is getting too personal. Too close to home.

"I appreciate your concern for Mr. Walker, Sophie. But I think it's important that we get to business as usual." I try to sound confident, but my voice falters.

Getting back to business as usual. Hadn't that been what I had been trying to do since walking out on Jacob?

Was it even possible that I could be the woman I was before he'd put his hands on me?

I clear my throat, trying to cough away the sudden emotion clogging it. "Okay?"

"Okay..." She sounds unconvinced but drops the subject. "Now back to that printer..."

We continue talking for a few more minutes before saying our goodbyes. Hanging up the phone, I reach for another dress on the rack, thinking of a life beyond this one.

A life after the birth. With the baby. A road to making PR history as one of the few women in a pro hockey executive position.

A life of exciting games on ice. A life of lasagna and Nonna's secret sauces.

A life with Gio, Nonna and Lex. And without Jacob...

I squeeze my eyes shut as the painful realization hits me. Hot tears slide down my cheeks, and this time, I make no attempt to stop them.

"Excuse me, miss?"

I glance up and notice a sales associate standing a few feet away, concern etched on her face.

"Everything all right?"

I wipe my tears away. "Yes, thank you. I'm fine."

I nod at her, and she drifts away, still carefully watching me.

At least I didn't lie. I do think without Jacob I'd live a life that's just "fine".

But what if it's never anything more than fine? What if I'm no longer okay with fine after sharing love with a man like him?

Want if I want more?