Page 81 of Sebastian
“You can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because that’s not the life I want for you.”
“You’re not living the life I want for you, either. So, I guess that makes us even.”
“Seby, please—”
“No pressure. You take the time to figure out what you want. I won’t come around. I won’t bother you. You won’t even know I live on the same island as you. But I need you to know that if ever the day comes that you want us, I’ll be waiting.” He rattled the words quickly before she could stop him. He needed to know that he’d laid his feelings out there for her to process in her own time. “That’s all I wanted to say.”
Sebastian forced himself to turn away. His body ached to be near her as he put one foot in front of the other to give her the space she requested.
“Wait.” Gabrielle caught his arm. Her soft hand caressed his forearm. “If you knew the shit I’ve done, you wouldn’t wait for me. You wouldn’t even like me.”
He turned back to her and trailed his fingertips along her face. “Can’t be worse than when you sent a bunch of college jocks to beat me to a bloody pulp just to impress you.” He chuckled. “If I got past that, I can get past anything you’re worried about.”
Her face grew serious. He could see the distress in her eyes, and he could see pure love, too. He was the one person who’d gotten her to let down all her walls. He could see something was eating her up inside. She didn’t want to end things with him, but she seemed to feel she had no choice.
He wanted to know why.
“No, I don’t think so,” Gabrielle blinked away her tears. She turned her back on him and crossed the room, slumping onto a chaise lounge. The sun’s rays bathed her exquisite skin in a warm glow.
“You shouldn’t wait for me,” Gabrielle reiterated.
In four long strides, he was next to her, sitting on the chaise lounge. Sebastian touched her face, caressing her soft, deep brown skin. “What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours? Gabs, talk to me.” She’d told him that he was her rock. That he made her feel safe, and that’s what he planned to remind her. “I’m not going anywhere. My love for you is so deep in my heart that I can’t let go of it. I can’t watch you in pain over something and not try to help.”
She bit her lower lip to stop it from trembling. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“I know you don’t.”
“But it’s inevitable. That’s why it’s better this way.” She pulled away but stayed within inches of him.
“Trust me, please, Gabs. You know my ugly truth about my father. My worries about getting close to you. Did it change how you feel about me?”
Gabrielle smiled. “No. I love you, Seby.”
“Say it again.”
“Stop it.”
“Please, I love the way that sounds.”
“I love you, Sebastian. Since you left the hospital—“
“Because you told me to.”
“I know, but since I asked you to leave the hospital, I’ve regretted it. Deep in here.” She pressed a hand against her heart. “I knew it was a mistake. But I’m afraid that if you knew what I’d done, it would change how you feel about me, and I’d lose you anyway.”
“If you’re so convinced, prove it. Tell me what heinous thing you’ve done in your past when you were a different person than the amazingly brilliant woman standing in front of me. Tell me so I can run for the hills and thank the universe that I didn’t get trapped into loving you.”
A laugh escaped her lips. “I’m serious.”
“So am I. If it’s inevitable, you need to kill my feelings for you. Put me out of my misery.”
“Are you miserable without me?”
“Hell yeah. This is brutal torture to have found you and not be allowed to love you how you deserve to be loved.”
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