Page 49 of Sea of Evil and Desire (The Deep Saga #1)

47

Morgana

S omeone was standing over me. My breath hitched in my chest, but it was only Finn.

How long had he been watching me?

I wiped a drool patch from my mouth and moved my elbow to cover its shadow on the pillow. Finn had replaced his nightgown with more of Granddad’s old clothes from the downstairs closet—an oversized knitted jumper and loose jeans. He’d tucked the jeans into a pair of Granddad’s old boots.

“I have to warn my father that Manannán’s powers have returned and his army is thirty thousand strong.” Finn’s tone was firm, but his voice remained quiet. “If we don’t go now, we’ll miss the dawn.”

I blinked at him through bleary eyes—I was still so tired.

“I understand if you need to rest.” He sat at the end of my bed. “My father has always suspected Taranis would attack. My whole life, he has ensured that I would be ready . . .” His face darkened. “But his plans are becoming more erratic. He has often put me in dangerous situations where I have just escaped death, and he doesn’t seem to care. I am worried about my people.” Finn gazed out the dark window, his features carved with worry.

I didn’t feel like putting my Selkie coat on. I felt like doing normal human stuff, like lazing around in front of the TV all day and eating chocolate. I felt like catching up on the latest reality dating show or gossiping with Skye, but Finn looked anxious, and Edward was still in the Neptūnus castle, so I got up, casting a longing glance at my unmade bed.

“Really?” I raised my brows at Finn, noticing the lacy pajamas I was wearing.

“Your other ones were damp.” The corners of his mouth twitched.

I shuddered as the events of the night came flooding back. The Drowned man’s cold, dead hands grasping at my body . . . the power that had ignited inside of me . . . and the massive black wave which had come this close to engulfing the town. The wheel shattering around me, and falling . . . falling into Finn’s arms.

It wasn’t over yet; Taranis was still out there, and he had an army.

I threw the fur coat over my shoulders but didn’t bother changing my clothes. As we reached the hallway, a loud rap on the front door saw me jump out of my skin. I glanced at Granddad’s bedroom, but his door was still shut. Barry had dropped him off late last night, and I doubted they would be up early to fish today.

Finn tensed beside me before striding to the door and throwing it open.

Pisceon was standing outside, holding a gas station takeaway coffee.

A coffee!

He was wearing human clothes—jeans and a white T-shirt. Was that all these Mer wore when they were on land?

“Cousin.” Finn’s voice was curt but flickered with amusement.

“I went to the house first, but your father suggested I might find you here.” Pisceon ran a hand through his dark hair.

Wait, the king knows where I live?

“I see the interrogation is going well.” He smirked as he took in my pajamas and sleepy eyes.

“We were just leaving.” Finn pushed past him through the door.

I followed. It was still dark outside.

“Let me guess . . .” Finn blew out a breath and surveyed his cousin. “Father sent you to make sure I came back and explained myself.”

“That’s the gist of it, and as you know, what Daddy Neptūnus says goes.” Pisceon winked at me and slapped Finn’s back, and the material of his tight shirt was strained across his muscular biceps.

I couldn’t believe this was the same Pisceon from the throne room. He was acting so normal—so human. I half expected him to ask Finn if they would catch the game later.

“You needn’t have bothered. We’re on our way.” Finn strode onto the dewy street. The streetlamps were still on, and their yellow light pooled around him.

“But then I wouldn’t have had a chance to come up here, would I, cousin?” He took another sip of his takeaway coffee and smacked his lips. “Ah, I love this drink!” He grinned at me.

“So does this mean you believe me now?” I narrowed my eyes on Pisceon, remembering how he had spat at me.

“I trust my cousin.” He surveyed me thoughtfully, his voice quieter. “If you had killed our people, there’s no way you’d still be standing here. This man is a beast .” He slapped Finn’s back again. Finn threw his arm off, rolling his eyes.

“You never know with this guy.” Pisceon was chuckling now. “Ah, the messes we’ve had to clean up . . . the blood . . .” He drew his chiseled face into a mock grimace.

“That’s enough.” Finn’s tone was a warning, but remained warm.

Together, we made our way down the hill toward the ocean. No one was about, only a cool fog. The waves were crashing against the faces of the distant cliffs. The clifftop looked empty without the Ferris wheel. Construction workers and police would undoubtedly be investigating the wreckage soon.

“I see you finally broke the wheel.” Pisceon quirked a brow. “Took you long enough.” He pulled a silver cigarette case from his pocket and offered Finn one.

“We fought Taranis’s Drowned last night. They were able to withstand my powers.” Finn looked at his cousin, his face grave.

“We?” Pisceon’s eyes widened.

“She did most of the work.” Finn placed the cigarette between his lips and smirked.

“What are you?” Pisceon peered at me in the morning light. I ignored him. It was a question I had been asking myself—what the hell was I? And what the fuck happened last night? When I didn’t answer, he turned back to Finn. “Do you think they were channeling Manannán’s necromancy?”

“Either that or his Mer blood, but some powerful force fueled them.” Finn’s cheeks caved as he drew on the cigarette.

“Should you be doing that with the Shadow and everything?” My brows kicked up.

“It’s been a rough night.” Finn blew out a cloud of smoke. “And we only contract the Shadow from polluted water, not human indulgences, but I am glad you’re so worried about me.”

I rolled my eyes, pulling the folds of my fur tighter as we reached the dark rocks at the top of the bay. The sky was still a deep shade of indigo, so I knew we hadn’t missed the dawn.

Pisceon started clambering over the rocks, and Finn followed, tossing the butt from his smoke into a bin on the boardwalk.

I hesitated. I couldn’t control my transformation. Finn turned and met my eyes. Noticing my reluctance, he said, “We will meet you there, cousin.”

“Suit yourself.” Pisceon shrugged as he stepped onto the slick sand. “I came up on Pháos anyway. I hope you don’t mind.” He gestured toward the white-bellied dolphin frolicking in the dark waves before striding into the surf. Aside from his back being too broad for his shirt, he looked the epitome of humanness. I couldn’t believe he was about to ride a dolphin back to his Mer castle!

What the actual fuck.

I almost chuckled out loud at the absurdity.

As he strode into the ocean, the faint glow on the horizon made his torso a dark silhouette. When the waves reached his waist, he dived. A moment later, he emerged further out, shirtless and grasping Pháos’s fin. He waved a muscular arm at us before the pair disappeared into the depths.

I looked at Finn in disbelief. “What happens to your clothes when you transform?” I scrambled down the remaining rocks to join him on the sand.

“Same thing as yours, I imagine. They disappear.” His dark curls had dried in a windswept look about his face. “You seem fascinated by our clothes . . . or lack of them.” The corners of his mouth twitched in amusement.

My cheeks burned.

“When I transform, I will wake up on SS Jones’s Lady. ” I searched his face for any sign of recognition of the prophecy and what that might mean about my father, but I saw nothing.

“That explains why you decided to live there, with the Drowned.” Finn scoffed.

I pushed past him, but he grabbed my hand, and his touch warmed my cold fingers.

“Do you know how fucking beautiful you look in the early morning light?” He stepped back, still holding on to me, as if he wanted to take me in fully.

“You can’t say these things to me.” I pulled my hand away, thinking of Princess Glacies and her tail of peridotite. But he’d said they had an understanding—that she had another lover.

He stepped toward me again, his eyes flickering with something predatory.

I took a step backward.

“When you fell last night, I didn’t know if I would reach you in time. I cursed myself for not saying everything I wanted to say or doing everything I wanted to do. ” A wrinkle deepened between his brows.

“When you were stabbed, I felt something similar,” I mumbled, examining the line of light glimmering on the distant horizon.

Finn moved toward me, his boots leaving imprints in the sand with each step until our bodies were inches apart.

“What if we took this moment to say them?” He ran his hand down my shoulder, drawing me to face him.

Silence enveloped us, and the intensity deepened the longer we swam in each other’s gaze. Even the crashing waves seemed softer.

Finally, I said, “You promise never to speak to me like this again if I tell you how I feel?” I lifted my chin to meet his dark eyes.

“I promise.” He exhaled the words. “I know I don’t deserve you—deserve this . I have tried to fight it, to focus on my duty, but you haunt me all the time, like the most beautiful fucking ghost.”

My thoughts were racing against the symphony of sighs from the crashing waves.

“You and Glacies?” My voice was quiet.

“I have never kissed her. She’s beautiful, yes, but I will not be a part of forcing her to go against her nature for our archaic traditions. When I succeed my father, I will set her free.” He thumbed my jaw, his expression now soft and with traces of a smile. “Even if this is all we ever have, I need to know how you feel.”

I chewed on my lip as my racing thoughts consumed me. I wanted to brush his dark hair from his forehead, to chase away the shadows that sometimes haunted his face. I longed to kiss the scars I knew lay hidden beneath his tattoos and uncover everything he kept behind those walls. But it was those very walls that frightened me. Now that I knew he’d been sent to follow me, how could I trust who the real Finn was?

He put his hand on my hip, and the distance between us seemed to tighten. He was so close, and yet I sensed nothing. Nothing .

The sea’s sighs became louder and louder as I studied his face.

Shimmering particles of sea spray and morning mist had formed ribbons across the bay, which sparkled with hues of soft pink in the faint morning light. The index finger on Finn’s free hand was ever so cocked, moving slowly from side to side; as it did, the glimmering droplets moved too. He was conducting them.

No thinking, just feeling.

I dragged my fingers through his hair, closing the space between us. His mouth found mine. The kiss was ferocious and salty as he pushed his body against me, tearing at my hair and my coat. His hands traveled to my waist, and he pulled me to him. The movement was rough and desperate as he whispered, “ Fuck .”

I let myself be drawn, putting one leg on either side of his; I ground myself against the hardness growing there.

The ribbons of mist he had been holding encircled us, drifting gracefully around our tangled bodies. It felt like we were embracing in a whirlpool of glitter made from nature’s beauty.

He pulled back from me ever so slightly to let his fingers caress the front of my pajama shorts. His mouth was still atop mine, but he withheld his tongue so he could hear my breathing . . . so he could hear the gasp I made when the circles he was making brushed just the right spot.

“I do want to fuck you, Morgana,” he whispered against my ear. “But I want you to know that I removed my allure, just in case that human part of you was still drawn to it. So if anything happened between us, I would be sure it was your choice.”

My choice. My knees turned to jelly. Oh, gods, I hadn’t known my body could feel these things.

How many humans had he been with? He certainly knew what he was doing.

There I go, thinking again. I should hate him because he’d lied to me and was engaged—but I didn’t . . . I couldn’t hate him, not after last night.

I loved the way his body was pressing against mine, the heat of his kiss, and his hands, which were now back at my waist, sliding against the bare skin under my lacy pajama top. He found my peaked nipple and gently caressed it before moving his calloused palm lower to cup my breast.

“Do you know how much I’ve wanted to do this since I saw you in your seal’s attire?” His voice was like gravel.

I responded with a whimper as his lips made their way to my neck, and his hand left my breast, traveling back to the space between my legs where the heat was building, begging for his touch. I might explode if I didn’t get it.

His breath warmed my skin, and suddenly I was back in the dark room as Rackham held me down and Teachie tried to pull open my legs. I grasped at my chest as anxiety washed over me, removing myself from Finn’s arms.

“Are you okay?” Concern flooded his dark eyes as he stepped back from me.

“I want you to do it,” I whispered. I needed a reprieve from my mind. The faces of the pirates, the sunken eyes of the Drowned, the wheel, the falling, and whatever ancient power I had awoken within myself were gnawing at the back of my subconscious.

“What are you saying?” he breathed.

“Do it. Fuck me,” I rasped out the words.

The mauve light suggested that the sun wouldn’t rise for another half hour, so we had time. I wanted to erase the experience of Rackham and Teachie from my mind—to replace it with this. My choice. This was my choice.

Sweeping me into his arms, Finn gently laid me on the sand, but my back was comfortable against my coat’s lining.

Propped on his elbows, he hovered above me, wincing slightly from the cut on his left shoulder. His sculpted chest was visible beneath the loose neckline of his sweater, and I could see where he must have stitched himself up last night.

I dragged my hands through his hair, pulling him to me, and his lips crashed against mine. My heart pounded against my rib cage as he lowered himself slowly, gently onto me without breaking the kiss. His hard cock was pressed between us, and I arched my back to grind into him.

“Fuck, you have no idea how much I’ve dreamed of this,” he growled, and the words coaxed heat from me until it was dripping onto my thighs.

Plucking at the elastic waist of my shorts, he slid a hand between my legs.

“Look how fucking wet you are for me.” The roughness in his voice only made me wetter.

“I want you now,” I whispered as his fingers teased me, and something began to build inside of me.

“Are you sure you want this? Once we do this, it can’t be undone.” His eyes roved my face while one hand continued to stroke between my thighs.

I nodded, but he withdrew his touch, propping himself up on his forearms to survey me.

“I am not a good person. I’ve done terrible things. You don’t know the real me . . .” His dark eyes bored into mine.

“Let me see,” I exhaled. “Let down your shields.”

His eyes flared with fear, still locked on mine.

“Let me see it all, and then I will decide if I want this or not,” I said, gentler this time, reaching up and cupping his jaw.

He bowed his head, and a gush of wind rushed over me as his shields evaporated.

Darkness. I was consumed by darkness. I could no longer see Finn above me, only the swirling black. His loneliness reached out to me from the shadows with long, bony fingers, and then his pain shook the bars of the blackness like it had been suppressed for too long. I started drawing quick breaths. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t get out.

“Morgana?” Finn’s voice said my name, but I was stuck in the dark void of his emotions. As he said it, a flicker of light ignited, a soft flame of gentleness, fighting against the swirling darkness to stay lit.

“Morgana?” He repeated my name, and the light flared.

Then, the shadows were gone. They were sucked away in another gust of wind. The world returned, and Finn’s handsome face swam back into view, his shields in place again.

His eyes searched mine, and they were filled with fear and sadness as he pulled his body away, leaning on one arm. “I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me now that you’ve seen what I am at my core.”

I reached for him, pulling him back on top of me.

The darkness in him had been terrifying, but I had seen the light, too—a flicker that ignited when he thought of me.

“I want you,” I breathed, looking into his silver-flecked black eyes. “I want all of you.”

I had come this close to losing my virginity against my will to the pirates. I wanted this—needed this—and I wanted it to be my decision. Finn had shown me everything that he was, and I chose him. I’d chosen him from the moment I met him.

The glittering mist cocooned us now, and I could no longer see the beach, so I assumed that meant people couldn’t see us.

He kissed me deeply; it was gentler than his earlier kisses, but he grew hard against me.

I moaned into the kiss, and he pressed his hardness deeper.

“I want you,” I said again, shuffling my pajama shorts to reveal lacy panties, and his eyes flared. It was as if no one had ever said these words to him and truly meant it.

He held my gaze as he bent down to press his lips against my thigh, sending a shudder coursing through me. Brushing his dark hair from his forehead, he surveyed the space between my legs with an expression that said he liked what he saw before tearing my underwear to one side and feasting on me. My back arched, hips rocking against his face, as I presented myself greedily, hungrily to him until my eyes rolled back and the mist above me blurred into a shimmering haze.

Oh, gods!

No one had ever done this to me—or made me feel this way. This . . . this was what it was like to enjoy foreplay.

Just as I was about to shatter for him, I tangled my fingers in his dark hair, dragging him from between my thighs and guiding his lips back to mine.

Our eyes met as he pulled back from the kiss, and I saw the question there.

“Do it, please ,” I breathed in assent, reaching for his jeans and unbuckling them.

His cock sprung free, and he took hold of it, running his hand up and down as he surveyed the space between my legs.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” His eyes had turned pure onyx with hunger.

Heat pounded between my thighs as I watched him stroke himself, and I wriggled my underwear off, letting my knees fall apart and presenting myself to him the way I’d seen women do in movies.

“Fucking hell.” A guttural noise rumbled from him, storm clouds racing across his jet-black eyes.

I linked my arms around his neck, pulling him onto me. He teased the tip of his length at my entrance, coating it with my wetness before he thrust forward in one long, slow movement. My body tensed from the burst of pain that rippled through me, but then it was gone, replaced with growing pleasure as he rolled his hips into me.

Slowly, he was going so slowly. I pulled at his hips, grinding on him, a silent plea for him to go harder. He chuckled into my ear before he obeyed. The world disappeared, and there was only us—breathing, clawing, and panting at one another.

He consumed me like a wave crashing against the shore, devouring my body, running over every inch of me. The power that rippled in his veins moved inside of me. The darkness was there too, but it was only a whisper, because he kept his shields in place. I let myself drown in him. Something deep inside warned me this would end in pain, but I didn’t care. I wanted him—I needed this.

One deep thrust had me breaking into pieces for him.

“Oh, gods, Finn!” I cried out his name as the world around me blurred into nothingness.

Finn’s hips slammed into me, and he let out a low growl. A final thrust saw his groan morph into a roar of release as he came too, showing me he was falling apart like I had.

It left me breathless—the intensity of it, of my pleasure. It was as if I had died, experienced nirvana, and been reborn, all in ten seconds.

As Finn sank onto my chest, the glittering mist remained around us like a cocoon, and our shattered pieces joined together to become whole.

We stayed like this for minutes until, in the absence of pleasure, my thoughts began to creep back in. I slipped out from under him and stood, brushing the sand from the back of my coat, and pulled my shorts back on. Finn’s eyes followed my every move.

“Should we . . . should we have used a condom?” My face blanched.

“It is highly unlikely that a Mer would get a different species pregnant—don’t worry. We may be able to walk on land, but our genetics haven’t progressed that far yet.” Finn chuckled, standing up.

His dark hair fell across his face as he buckled his jeans. When his eyes found mine again, they were sad, as if he knew what I was about to say.

Stepping backward, I kept my eyes locked on his. “This will never happen again—you promised. We’ve had this moment, and now, should anything happen, we will have no regrets.” I swallowed.

He nodded. “Never again, unless you ask for it.” His chest was heaving.

The heat inside me was crying out in protest, willing to sell its soul to have more of his touch, but I ignored it.

He brushed his hair from his forehead, stepping closer to me so our faces were inches apart. His breath was warm on my cheeks in the cold morning air. He leaned forward, and as he did, the shimmering mist of sea spray enveloped us again. Pressing his mouth against my forehead, he kissed me softly. Then, he rested his head against mine.

“Thank you,” he said quietly.

“What for?”

He exhaled sadly as I pulled away, and the magical mist disappeared. “For allowing me this moment, where I forgot the world existed and only saw you.”

I strode into the water, nibbling on my lip to stop myself from smiling. I was no longer a virgin, and it had been my choice.

I could still taste him on my lips—feel his hands on me. I shook the thoughts away. Never again. We’d had this moment, and I didn’t regret it, but a moment was all it could be.

“You won’t get a warm welcome,” I warned as my toes met the surf. The cold water was a good distraction from the heat lingering on my cheeks and the residue between my legs.

“The Drowned don’t scare me,” Finn spat as he dashed after me.

We were both waist-deep in water now. Its chilly arms clenched my hips as the sun appeared above the horizon. Finn hadn’t transformed yet; he was looking at me, intrigued.

Great. He is going to watch me shift. I had no idea what I looked like when I changed, but it probably wasn’t graceful.

The glow on the horizon was spreading. Finn moved behind me as if waiting for the showdown. I glanced over my shoulder at him—the legs of his jeans were soaking, and the wind plucked at his sweater, but he showed no sign of cold.

Please let me control the way I morph.

I had the powers of Siana Selich. They had turned two Drowned men to dust and split the Ferris wheel. Surely, I could control this.

I concentrated on the glow pervading the horizon. I tried to block SS Jones’s Lady out of my mind and imagined being free to fall into the open sea. The wind picked up around me, and I felt the familiar rushing sensation. I fought to hold on to my clarity, but consciousness was slipping away from me. Glancing down, I saw I had transformed. The waves still lapped at my waist, the sea stretching out before me.

I did it!

I spun around to Finn. In that moment of weakness, the transformation overtook me. I doubled over, retching as vertigo swept through me. The sound of music confirmed what I already feared—I had failed.

Come ye sunken traitors to the bottom of the sea.

The hollow voices of the dead heralded my arrival.

The Drowned in the bar were silent; there was no fighting or sloshing of cups. They sat at the crowded wood benches and round tables, all glowering in the same direction.

Finn lounged at the bar, his crimson-tipped tail keeping him casually afloat. He was conversing with the Captain and ignoring the menacing scowls of the Drowned.

I picked my way through the tables toward him. Some of the muttering became louder as I passed. Amusement flickered in Finn’s eyes when he saw me.

“What?” I asked sharply as I reached his side.

“Nice transformation.” He continued to laugh, leaning both elbows on the bar as he surveyed me.

I glared at him.

“You transformed and seemed fine, but then you fell face-first into the water and disappeared. Boy am I glad I stuck around to see that.” He chuckled, shaking his head as he reached his tattooed arm around for the bottle of rum the Captain had filled for him.

“I see Prince Aigéan has found you,” the Captain said, his amber eye sparkling. His little sea snake came out and bobbed its head.

“You knew it was the prince who’d rescued me, but you didn’t say anything?” I rounded on him.

“I know many things that I do not say.” He shrugged and placed a second bottle of rum on the slimy counter for me.

No shit!

“I look forward to making you my bitch, Prince Aigéan!” The cry came from one of the tables of Drowned. A ripple of supportive hisses passed through the bar.

“Say that to my face, I dare you.” The muscles in Finn’s tattooed pectorals rippled as he glared across the room. The breath whooshed from my chest as his image faltered, and razor-sharp, jagged teeth, and hollow, pale eyes flashed across his face. His hands became the webbed claws that had held me in Therme Skótos.

The Drowned went silent.

A gnarly fisherman let out a loud hiccup, then clamped his fist across his mouth, terror sweeping his face as Finn turned his now globe-like eyes on him. Then his monstrous features were gone, and the handsome dark-haired merman returned as his body relaxed, but his black eyes still simmered with the inklings of something beast-like.

The heat rose between my legs again. What the fuck was wrong with me?