Page 80 of Saving Sparrow (Slow Burns & Tragic Beginnings #2)

Then

Half asleep, I reached across the bed. Fingers grasped mine, pulling me into a warm embrace.

I rubbed my hand up and down the broad back, stilling at the feel of unmarred skin.

“Quentin?” I rasped. We blinked fully awake, staring at each other before jerking upright.

We were the only two in bed. We leapt up, rushing out of the bedroom.

Turning the corner, we spotted Elliott tiptoeing to the apartment door.

“Are you fucking sneaking out?”

Elliott’s shoulders stiffened at Quentin’s shocked question, a guilty expression on his face.

“ Are you?” I asked.

“I… I told you I had to go to the bookstore this morning.”

“Not this again.” Quentin tossed his hands in the air.

“Not what again?” I looked between them. “Elliott, not what again?”

“What about last night?” Quentin barked. “You’re still going after last night?”

“Will someone tell me what the heck is going—”

“ I wasn’t the one who was supposed to change last night,” Elliott said. “You were, but it sounds like you’re still the same.”

“I forbid you to go.” Quentin jabbed a finger at him.

Elliott raised his chin. “I’m going anyway.”

“Not if I tie you up first.”

“Hey!” I jumped in front of Quentin, holding him back. “Tell me what’s going on now!”

Quentin wouldn’t take his eyes off Elliott, as if he thought he might disappear if he did. “He’s getting a job.”

“What? You didn’t mention that last night.”

“Because I didn’t think it was relevant anymore.”

“So you, what, thought you fucked me back to my senses?” Elliott asked in a tone I wasn’t used to hearing from him.

“Yes!”

Elliott fumed. “I want my own money. I’m getting a job.”

I turned to Elliott, still holding a trembling hand against Quentin’s chest. “So, it’s true? You’re serious?”

The defiant fire in Elliott’s gaze faded, the shy, sweet guy I fell in love with peering back at me. “Yes,” he said softly. I could feel the thread holding us together unraveling, and it terrified me.

Quentin pushed against my hold. “Why are you doing this?” he whispered. “Why are you leaving us?”

“I’m not leaving you. Will you just listen to me?”

“Okay, yes, sure. I can do that.” Quentin nodded. “Talk to me.”

All hope drained from Elliott’s face. Quentin didn’t get it. Elliott had been talking to us for weeks now, even when not saying anything at all.

How could I have let us get here? It was easy talking Quentin down from the little things.

Rushing through the woods for Elliott when he needed space.

Convincing him to wait until Elliott was ready to talk about his sexuality, stopping him from dragging Elliott into our bed when he’d decided to sleep in the guest room at Dylan’s house…

All those things were easy because they didn’t cost us Elliott. Getting Quentin to see Elliott had room in his heart for other people, that he could make new friends and still love us… That was different because what if he couldn’t? What if he realized he didn’t need us at all?

We couldn’t hold on to him like this, though. We were pushing him away.

I had to fix this, fix us. I should’ve done it a long time ago. “Go, Ellie.”

Elliott’s eyes widened.

“What? No way.” Quentin’s breathing turned ragged, and I held him back with both hands now. “Elliott, don’t do this,” Quentin begged. Elliott paused with his hand on the doorknob, his gaze torn.

“Go!” I said.

“Can’t you see it’s happening again?! Can’t you see we’re losing him too?!” Quentin’s words were frantic, loud, and filled with pain that had nothing to do with Elliott.

“And whose fault is that?” I asked quietly.

He didn’t answer, but he stopped fighting me. For the first time since we flew out of the bedroom, he turned his gaze on me. They were wild and full of hurt.

“It’s our fault.” I cupped his cheeks. “It’s ours, Quentin.”

“What are we supposed to do?”

I shrugged. “We let him go.”

“But—”

“I’ll be back,” Elliott said to him. “I’ll always come back.”

This wasn’t about the job at the bookstore or whether Elliott would come back after. This was bigger than that.

Quentin paced, shaking out his hands. “Is this gonna be a full-time thing?”

“A few hours after classes, three days a week tops,” Elliott assured him. “No weekends. My weekends are for us. The discount is great too.” He looked at me. “I could probably get us the next SJM novel the night before it releases.”

“That’d be great.” My voice was thick.

“And you guys can come by anytime. I hear there’s a cozy nook area. You can read while Quentin watches his sports stuff.”

“Yeah, okay.” I nodded. “Sounds good.”

“Okay,” Elliott repeated. He seemed nervous now that he’d won the rebellion.

“How are you getting there?” Quentin asked.

“I was gonna walk.”

“Alone?” He was getting worked up again. I placed a hand on his lower back.

“Will you at least text us when you get there?” I asked.

Elliott patted around his pockets, wincing when he came up empty. Quentin ground his teeth. “I’ll get it,” Elliott said.

“Is the battery charged?” I asked. He winced again, the muscles in Quentin’s back tensing. “You can take mine,” I said. “I’ll charge yours, and you can take mine.”

I grabbed my phone off the nightstand, confirming that the Share My Location was on. Back in the hall, I stopped before turning the corner, eavesdropping on Elliott and Quentin.

“I’m sorry for being a dick, and I’m sorry about what happened at the game. I’m sorry for anything I ever did that made you want to leave.” He sounded desperate, taking me back to the day when my mother died.

“I’m sorry I didn’t protect her, Guelly.”

“I’m sorry for being sassy and for provoking you at the game.”

“I kind of like you sassy.” It was supposed to be a joke, but the tremble in Quentin’s voice ruined it. “Does this mean Groupie-Grayson wants to be your friend too?”

Grayson? My ears perked up.

“Probably not. He already resigned. I’m technically taking his place.”

Grayson must be the person getting him the job.

“You left that part out last night.”

“Yeah, I think the ‘provoking you’ apology covers that.” They went quiet, but then Elliott spoke again. “You never did anything to make me want to leave. You’re stuck with me, Q. It’s just us here. No matter what, no matter who, it’s still just us.”

I stepped out of my hiding spot. “Okay, here you go.”

Elliott blinked, holding his hand out for the phone. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, no problem.” I hugged him, pecking him on the lips before squeezing him again. “I’m sorry for letting it get this far,” I whispered in his ear. “Hurry back.”

I headed to Quentin’s side again, watching as Elliott slipped through the door. Quentin stormed off the moment it closed. I followed, rubbing the heel of my palm over my heart.

He shoved the bedroom window up, sticking his head out to watch Elliott walk down the street. He stormed to the bathroom next.

“Hey, where are you going?” I called when he emerged minutes later in workout gear.

“For a run.”

I flinched when the front door slammed, sighing before plugging in Elliott’s phone.

Elliott texted that he’d be a while longer. They were training him on the spot. Quentin hadn’t come back from his run, so I decided to handle my errand alone.

Twenty minutes later, I waited in front of the Nighthawk dormitory for Rachel to come down.

“Should I be concerned that you know which dorm I live in?” She stopped several feet away, crossing her arms defensively.

“Elliott might’ve mentioned it.”

“I was surprised when Alex said someone named Miguel was waiting outside.”

“I saw her going in; she said she knew you.”

“So what can I do for you? Here with a warning about Elliott?”

I deserved that. “Look, I know Quentin and I haven’t been the friendliest people, but—”

“ You haven’t been so bad. At least you don’t snarl when you see us.”

I grimaced. “Yeah, Quentin can be a bit overprotective.”

Rachel snorted. “You think?”

“The three of us are really close; some may even say we’re codependent.”

“They’d be right.”

“Yeah, well, I won’t apologize for that.

We’ve been through a lot, and we’re okay with the way we love each other.

Quentin and I shouldn’t have been cold to you and Kayden, though.

And we shouldn’t have stood in the way of Elliott making new friends.

From the outside looking in, we probably seem unsafe for him.

The last thing I want is for people to think we’re controlling him.

It’s the last thing I want him to think. Love shouldn’t work like that.”

Rachel slipped her hands into her back pockets, relaxing her posture. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Elliott’s been sheltered most of his life, so there’s a lot he doesn’t know, a lot he hasn’t experienced.

He sees a part of himself in us, but there are other parts he sees reflected in Kayden—and anyone like Kayden.

He’s looking for something we can’t give him, and he really wants to find it.

” I kicked at the grass. “So, are you and Kayden still interested in being his friends?”

“And risk being throttled by The Arm?” she joked.

“He won’t throttle you—but I can’t promise he won’t want to.” I chuckled. “He’ll get over it. Promise. Once he sees how happy Elliott is after you work your makeup magic, and Kayden helps him pick the perfect outfit for drag night, and—”

“Alright, alright…” She grinned, stepping closer. “Elliott’s sweet. I was sold the moment I saw you out here.”

“Yes,” I hissed. “Wait, you knew why I was here?”

She shrugged. “You weren’t wearing your I-feel-guilty-for-what-I’m-doing face today. Today you looked pitiful, apologetic.”

“I hate seeing him sad,” I admitted.

“Me too. Sooo,”—She gestured to her face—“you really think my makeup skills are magic?”

“Oh, yeah, of course. Totally. Especially the, er, gold shadow powder and the, umm, lash… scara?”

“ Eyeshadow and mascara ,” she corrected.

“I was so close.”

She shook her head, smiling. “Poor Elliott. He really does need us. Will you give him my number?”

“Oh, here.” I held Elliott’s phone out, and she saved her info.

“Okay, well, I gotta head back. Alex is waiting for me to work my magic on her. Guess I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah, guess you will.”

“You know,” she started, walking backwards, “I just thought of this crazy, wacky, insane idea.”

“What is it?”

She grinned. “Maybe we can all be friends.” With that, she turned, heading inside.