Page 32 of Save the Last Dance (Take the Backroads #1)

Her stomach lurched uneasily around the popcorn she’d eaten and she checked to be sure the trash bin was still close by. Her arms itched, the skin newly revealed and available for her nails to find comfort.

“Oh, honey, don’t misunderstand me.” Gram leaned forward, lowering her legs so she could lay a hand on Ally’s arm.

“You’ve got your mama’s genes in you, too, and I pray you won’t have to walk the walk I’ve had to.

But if—and that’s a mighty big if—you have problems like mine, I want you to grab hold of every ounce of help available so you can continue to blossom into the bright, wonderful young woman I know you can be. ”

Ally’s chin quivered as her grandmother voiced the deep fears that had been rumbling inside, yet giving her hope when exposing them to the light.

She squeezed Gram’s hands, encouraging her to continue.

Needing her because Gram understood about the fears of being labeled and laughed at in a way her mom never could.

“Ally, dear, if science had given me half the options your generation has now and if I’d allowed myself to take them rather than worrying so much about what small-minded gossips thought of me, I wouldn’t be such a proper mess.

” She patted Ally’s arm again and leaned back.

“My issues went untreated for a long time, and the longer you let it go, the harder it is to find level ground again.”

“You’re not a mess, Gram.” Ally loved her grandmother fiercely. And for the first time, she wondered how leaving town would affect her. Would Gram be angry with her? Disappointed in her? Would it upset her?

Maybe she could call Gram after she left, to reassure her.

“That’s because I’d never showed you my scary side before today.” Gram made the face again—the sneering, scary one—and Ally made a fast grab for her phone. “Nuh-uh. You’re not putting me on Insta-Matic.”

“It’s Instagram. And it even has gram in the name. It’s perfect for you.” Ally put the phone back in her lap and was quiet for a long moment. “So…about the other thing. You think I should take medicine for the scratching…and talk to somebody, a professional somebody?”

Her voice wobbled as she said it, because no matter how Gram explained it, Ally worried the whole Finley family saw her as a carbon copy of her grandmother.

And although Gram definitely wasn’t a mess, she had hurt family and friends with outbursts that Ally had never witnessed.

Plus, she was moody and didn’t want to see people sometimes, which maybe had hurt Ally now that she thought about it.

But it’s not as if she could control that.

“That’s not my call to make. I think you should talk to your doctor and tell her why you scratch, and she’ll help you figure out a better way to deal with your feelings.

But if a day comes—long after I’m gone—when a doctor says medicine and therapy could help you cope with those feelings, I want you to remember what I told you.

I don’t want you to be stubborn like me. ”

Ally wanted to tell her they still had a long time together, but a sharp rap at the door almost scared her out of her seat.

“Who is that?” she started to ask, hopping to her feet, but the side door was already starting to open.

Gram looked unconcerned.

“Can I come in?” a man’s voice called a second before Ally’s dad peered around the door into the living room.

“Geez, Dad. You scared me to death.” Ally picked up the popcorn bowls and empty glasses to bring into the kitchen while her father stepped inside with one of Ally’s floral tote bags under his arm.

Luce, Gram’s lab, followed him inside, tail wagging and thunking against the fridge.

“I brought you some stuff your mom packed for you.” Dad’s voice was weird and awkward whenever he mentioned her mother lately. Like Mom was some alien creature who didn’t live with them. “And some mail I thought you might want to see.”

He shouldered the bag off his arm and flashed a white envelope with the University of Kentucky logo. The college was one of many her mom had insisted Ally add to her list of places to apply to.

“Probably just another ad for the school.”

Dad squinted at the envelope. “It’s from the Education Abroad program.”

“Scott,” Gram called from the living room. “Come in here so I can hear what you’re saying.”

Ally took the envelope without reading it and followed her father into the living room. “Why were all the lights on at our house when I went by earlier? ”

She’d been too upset about Ethan to stop in before, but she was curious what was going on at home. Plus, now that she noticed, Dad had another bag under his arm.

“Are you going somewhere?” she asked, tugging on the duffel while Luce nudged the back of Ally’s knee with her head.

She reached down to pet the dog, scratching her behind the ears.

“Actually, Ally.” He paused near her grandmother’s chair. “I’m sorry to crash your sleepover, but I might need to stay here tonight.”

“What?” Why tonight of all nights did Dad decide he had to be here?

“I don’t know where else to go.” He sucked in a deep breath and Ally realized that he looked like hell. Unshaven. Shaggy. Tired. “Your mother asked me to leave.”