Page 37 of Savage Blooms (Unearthly Delights #1)

Finley was leaning against the island pouring some coffee into a glazed mug, looking rumpled and touchable in a green T-shirt and soft plaid pajama bottoms. Adam was wearing one of his traveling Henleys over gray sweatpants and, judging by the imprint of his half-hard cock against the fabric, no briefs.

Nicola was momentarily dazzled by the sight of them both, feeling very spoiled for choice.

“Hey there,” Adam said.

“Good morning,” Finley chimed in pleasantly, and thank God, he wasn’t making anything weird.

Nicola didn’t think she could stand it if anyone tried to make last night weird.

She was utterly earnest about sex, and had always been terrible at playing the cool girl-who-can-pretend-they-care-less game, even in casual flings. “Want some coffee?”

“Yes please,” Nicola said, eyes following the way Finley fixed Adam’s coffee just the way he liked it, without having to be asked. Had he been paying that close attention to their tastes?

Finley poured Nicola a hot cup of coffee with plenty of milk and a tiny spoonful of sugar, just enough to take the bitterness away, and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek while he pressed it into her hands.

Nicola turned her face at the last moment, offering him her mouth, and Finley gladly kissed her on the lips, as sweetly as though they had known each other their entire lives.

Adam watched with raised eyebrows, a small smile on his face. Nicola couldn’t help but kiss him too, pressing her lips right over that smile. Adam blinked at her, looking twitterpated and so, so cute.

“Hi,” he said, like he hadn’t said hello to her moments before.

“Hi,” she said back.

Finley looked through the window above the sink, and said with a sigh, “There she goes.”

Sure enough, Eileen was trudging up over a distant hill, shoulders hunched against the gray drizzle, wrapped in a coat that didn’t look remotely warm enough.

“Is she all right?” Adam asked, one hand drifting up thoughtlessly to rest on Nicola’s waist.

“She does this sometimes,” Finley muttered, draining his coffee. “Gets a bee in her bonnet about taking the air, or trying to climb a tree or swim the loch. She doesn’t know her own limits. I’ll call her back.”

“I can catch up with her,” Adam said brightly. And then, suddenly self-conscious, “If that’s okay with you. It’s just that you seem to spend a lot of your time making sure she’s all right. I don’t mind splitting that load with you, if you trust me to watch out for her.”

Finley looked startled, like such a thing had never occurred to him. But he nodded, slowly at first and then more resolutely.

“Yes. That would be very nice, actually. No need to lecture her. Just make sure she’s not catching her death out there, and try to convince her to come back inside quickly, will you? She isn’t supposed to go out in weather like this.”

“On it,” Adam said, stealing one more greedy kiss from Nicola before pulling his jacket off the coat hook and trotting out the kitchen door.

As soon as Adam was gone, Finley plucked up Nicola’s hand and brought it to his mouth.

“Thank you for last night,” he said, pressing his lips to her knuckles.

Nicola smiled at him, feeling warmer than summer.

“It was a lot of fun. We should do it again sometime.”

“I agree. But I would like to take you out on a proper date too, if you would let me. Consider it an apology for being an ass and fending you off for so long.”

“Are you done fending me off, Mr Buchanan?”

Finley gave her a lopsided smile.

“You’re a sweetness I don’t want to run from, Miss Fairweather.”

Nicola took a deep swig of coffee, grinning at him mischievously, and then sat down at the kitchen table. Finley sat down beside her, easy and comfortable, like they did this all the time, like they were more to each other than strangers bonded by shared emotional entanglements.

“Can I ask you something?” she said, gathering up her courage. “About sex?”

“You’re very direct,” Finley said.

“We can talk about something else, if you want.”

“No, I like it. I’m just not used to it. Eileen is a bit more… roundabout when it comes to talking about how she feels. Yes, ask me anything.”

“The way you are with Eileen… Is that the way you are with everybody?”

“You mean, do I want to hurt all my partners?”

“Yes.” She leaned in close to study his face. He was so lovely, in a melancholy way. Like a spurned prince from a Shakespeare play usurping his older brother’s throne.

Finley took his time thinking, running his thumb along the handle of his mug.

Then, finally, he said: “It’s hard to say what’s me and what’s how I’ve learned to be when I’m with Eileen.

But yes, I think this predilection has been with me since the start, and yes, that wanting – to bruise or to bite or to restrain – is always there.

But it’s not the only thing I like. And I would never do that to someone who didn’t like it too. Does that make sense?”

“Perfect sense,” Nicola said with a big smile. “And you seemed to like it when I pinned you down last night.”

“I did, very much.”

“Has anybody ever done that to you before?”

“Never,” Finley said, fixing her with a look of longing that felt like pure power coursing through her veins.

“We should do that again sometime too, then.”

“I’d like that.”

“You’d better be careful getting close to me,” Nicola said, with a brittle laugh. For a few moments things had felt so good, so cozy, but now those old insecurities were creeping in like a thief in the night. “I can be a handful.”

“I don’t think you’re a handful.”

Nicola could have brushed him off, or smiled and accepted the shallow compliment.

If he was just someone she was trying to get with at a bar, or be pleasant enough to to get invited on a second date with, she might have.

But Nicola really liked Finley, maybe even as much as she liked Adam, and that was freaking her out so bad she couldn’t breathe.

It seemed easier, at this point, to confess rather than to disappoint him later.

“My mother surrendered me to the state when I was ten days old. I bounced between foster care and group homes for most of my childhood. Some of the families were better than others, but none of them ever stuck around for long. I was a really difficult kid. I would get jealous of other children and I had horrible separation anxiety and I would have these… meltdowns. I still do, if I’m being honest. You only think I’m easy to get along with because you haven’t seen me get upset yet. ”

She punctuated this admission with a laugh, trying to take some of the sting out of the somber topic. But Finley just looked at her with that level gaze that made her feel like she was the only woman on earth.

“That sounds very lonely, and it sounds like you blame yourself for the actions of the adults who were supposed to keep you safe. That’s not how family is supposed to treat each other. You’re a bright, sweet-natured person, Nicola. I don’t doubt that for a moment.”

“Thank you. But you don’t actually know me that well yet.”

Finley laced his fingers between hers under the table.

“No, not yet. But I’d like to. Is that enough, for a start?”

Nicola blinked the sting of water from her eyes.

“Yes,” she said. “Definitely.”

Finley leaned forward and kissed her, really kissed her, like he might never see her again. Nicola kissed him back, sweet and deep, until she was breathless.

“I appreciate how gentle you are with me,” she said, because it was easier than voicing any of the other sentiments that were bubbling up inside her, the ones dangerously close to fondness, or even love.

She was moving too fast, hurtling from person to person at the speed of light.

It was her damaged attachment style, she reminded herself, or a disordered love map, or whatever other defect inside her soul that therapists had clinical language for.

A shadow passed across Finley’s face, and his grip on her hand slackened.

“I don’t think I’m very gentle.”

“Why do you say that?”

“You’ve seen how I am with Eileen. I can be selfish, demanding. Cruel. It’s not a very gentle thing, to take pleasure from the pain of others.”

“I’m not entirely sure what goes on behind closed doors with you and Eileen, but from what I can see, you love her very much. I’ve seen you acting tender, so don’t pretend like it’s all whip and chains.”

“I hate working with chains,” Finley said with a laugh. “They’re more trouble than they’re worth. And I’m nowhere near skilled enough to use a bullwhip.”

His hand smoothed up her back, and his fingers slotted gently into her hair. He rubbed a little circle into the pressure point at the base of her neck with his thumb, sending warmth spreading down Nicola’s spine.

“I’m surprised I haven’t frightened you away yet,” he murmured.

“You’re going to have to try a lot harder than that to scare me,” Nicola said, tipping her chin up bravely.

“Oh yeah?”

Finley tightened his grip in her hair for a moment, and Nicola’s eyes went wide with surprise, her heartbeat kicking up. The air was suddenly tense, charged with possibility. Then Finley released her and went back to massaging that pressure point, as though to apologize for his roughness.

“I think we like a lot of the same things,” Nicola said, suddenly shy. Since when did she have any reticence when it came to talking about sex? “I’m not a shrinking violet. I’m sure if you had any idea about half the things that excite me, you’d be scared off.”

“I doubt it. But by all means, try to scandalize me. What do you like?”

It was always easier to think about these sorts of things in the privacy of her own bed than it was to bring them up in mixed company. But she was trying to trust Finley, even the little bit that she could. If she wanted to build anything real with him at all, she would have to be honest.

“Well,” she said, taking a shaky breath, “I’ve always liked the idea of being chased.”

“Chased?” Finley echoed, dark delight in his voice.

“Hunted down and ravished, to be precise.”

“I’ve never done that with anyone. I’d like to do it with you.”

“Yeah?” Nicola asked, her voice jumping half an octave.

“Yeah,” Finley said, nudging her nose with his own. “As soon as we’re able. But right now, I’d like to just talk to you, and keep kissing you. Does that sound all right?”

“That’s perfect,” Nicola said. “And while we’re talking, can we talk about what’s going on with Eileen? What’s uh… What’s her deal?”

“We can talk about that until you’re blue in the face and you’re not likely to find any satisfying answers, but I’m happy to chat things through. What are you worried about, exactly?”

“I know she means so much to you, and not to put too fine a point on it, but you’re all she has in the world. I like you, Finley, I like you a lot, but I couldn’t live with myself if I ruined something between the two of you. Is she okay with this?”

As though to make her point, Nicola nodded down to her and Finley’s joined hands.

“We talked for quite some time last night. She’s as comfortable with me exploring my connection to other people as I am with her exploring her own. We love each other, and we’ll love each other until we’re both cold in our graves, but that doesn’t mean we control each other’s every move.”

“Do you think that means she’ll make a move on Adam?” Nicola asked, chewing her lip. Why did romance have to be so hard? Why couldn’t everyone just have everything they wanted, with no hurt feelings or complications?

“I’m fairly confident that’s what last night was about,” Finley said with a curt laugh.

“Eileen would rather die than ask for what she wants outright. Everything has to be a riddle with her. My advice to you is: talk to Adam. See how he feels, make sure no one is lying to anyone about what they’re after.

Everyone should have equal say in this. Otherwise, I wouldn’t worry. ”

“Okay,” Nicola said. And with the sunlight streaming in through the windows into Finley’s curls, his hazel eyes warm with affection, she truly wasn’t worried at all.