Page 6

Myles

I have no idea whether I just made the worst decision of my life or the best. I could have kept what I knew to myself. I didn’t need to open Pandora’s box.

There was a risk to that plan, though. Chances were, eventually, Madison would have remembered what happened in the car last night. Either way, she’s mortified.

I know she’s still in the kitchen. I haven’t heard a single noise from her since I stepped into the living room and started pacing.

The thing I can’t shake is that she specifically told me she has dreams. A person might be able to control errant thoughts when they’re awake, but dreams are the product of the subconscious mind. They’re telling.

So, now what?

Minutes tick by. I wander to the windows and stare out at the ocean.

I love this view. It’s so peaceful. Madison might have dreams and machinations about me dominating her, and it brings me to my knees that I have the same exact fantasies.

But I want more. I want to stand here with her wrapped in my arms in front of me while we both look at the amazing view of the Puget Sound.

I want to set my chin on the top of her head and just be.

I’m forty-three years old. I’ve never had thoughts like that about any other woman. There is nothing about this situation that’s okay. Even though I didn’t pine over Madison lustily when she was underage, who would ever believe that?

If the roles were reversed, and I was Hendrix, I would kick my ass into the ocean and leave me to drown.

She was nineteen the first time her presence made my breath catch in my throat. Before that, she was a kid. She was kind of nerdy in high school, which there’s nothing wrong with. I like the fact that she’s bookish and studious.

I don’t think she liked her geeky reputation in high school. I think she felt awkward and didn’t fit in. She didn’t date, and she rarely went anywhere on the weekends. She had friends, but they were like her and worked hard. Sometimes, they had sleepovers or got together to study.

Hendrix worried about her, but I know he was also relieved that she never gave him heart palpitations or got into trouble growing up. Maybe the reason she has naughty schoolgirl fantasies is because she never misbehaved in her youth.

I doubt she acts out now. I believe that last night was a one-off. I trust she wouldn’t do something so careless again. But I’ve set the path, and I can’t back down.

Things really went sideways in a hurry when I saw her in her room wearing that towel and she sassed me. I had no business suggesting I would yank the towel off and spank her. It was the most irresponsible thing I’ve ever said. It’s opened a door I can’t close.

And that little speech I just gave her? I must be out of my mind.

I sense her presence behind me, but I don’t turn around. I’m going to let her make the next move.

“Why am I moving in with you, Myles?” she asks in a faint voice.

Her words and tone are unexpected. Her question is filled with a million smaller ones. I don’t have the answers. Well, I do. But they aren’t appropriate.

I look over my shoulder and reach out a hand, saying nothing. It’s an olive branch. Or a plea. Or a foolish move. I don’t know.

She shuffles toward me.

As soon as she’s close enough, I pull her in front of me and nestle her back against my front—exactly where I’ve dreamed of having her. I wrap my arms around her and set my chin on top of her head.

This is my dream. It’s completely inappropriate to have ever thought of holding her, and I’m crossing a huge line by acting on it, but I can’t help myself.

She slowly relaxes in my embrace, saying nothing while we watch the water lap against the shore. At least, that’s what I’m doing. I guess I can’t be sure she even sees the water. Depends on how deep she’s in her mind.

“How’s your head?” I finally ask before I kiss the top of it like an idiot.

“Better,” she whispers.

“Let’s go get your things.” I’m reluctant to break the connection we have—both physically and mentally.

But we really should get going. She’s right about confronting her roommates.

I’m not really interested in talking to them.

I’d rather get in and get out while they’re nursing their hangovers in bed.

The ride to the house is quiet. I grip the steering wheel; Madison wrings her fingers together in her lap.

A relieved exhale escapes her when we step into her house and find it silent. She glares at me when I follow her into her room. “Seriously?” she hisses, shutting the door.

I smirk. “I don’t joke about important things.”

“What’s important about you watching me pack?” she whispers loudly.

I’m being highhanded and bossy. I have no right, but I can’t stop myself. I head for her closet, open it, grab two duffel bags from the floor, and put them on the bed. “You should probably get a move on unless you want to risk answering questions from your roommates.”

She draws in a breath and heads for the closet first.

I perch against her nightstand, wondering if she’s eventually going to want to open it.

Again, I have no right. I shouldn’t be stopping Madison from masturbating.

I definitely shouldn’t say something like that out loud.

But the truth is I will. If she pushes this issue, I will lay down the law.

She is not going to touch her pussy under my roof.

I cross my arms over my chest and don’t move an inch while she flits around the room and her bathroom. When it’s obvious she’s stuffed the last items into her bags, she turns toward me.

“You’re blocking my nightstand.”

“Yep.”

“You looked in it last night, didn’t you?”

“Yep.”

Her face turns red. “I’m a grown woman, Myles.”

“I’m well aware.”

She sets her hands on her hips and narrows her gaze.

Keeping her voice low, she says, “Let me get this straight. You intend to take over my life. I’m forced to move into your house.

I’m grounded from anything fun. I can’t go anywhere except my classes.

You’re going to monitor my whereabouts. I’m not allowed to drink alcohol.

And on top of that, I’m not permitted to masturbate? ”

I’m impressed by her ability to hold my gaze and speak those words. I nod. “That’s right.”

She throws her arms up in exasperation. “Myles, do you realize how fucked-up this is?”

“Yep.” I do. I’m fully aware. I can’t process it. I’m following my instincts. My gut tells me there’s no way I can let Madison finger her pussy, and not a chance in hell she’s going to press a vibrator against her clit. Fuck to the no.

She’s…mine. I’ll decide when she gets to come. Not her.

Madness? Yes. Insanity.

I have no right. I keep reminding myself of that, but still, I keep pushing her. I want her to admit she’s mine. I want her to submit to me more than I want my next breath.

It’s not like I can lump this demand in with the others. I can’t suggest I would tattle to her father if I caught her masturbating. I can’t hold something like that over her head to keep her in line. I’m crossing way over said line. But she’s still not fucking touching herself.

A slow smile forms, and she smirks before she shrugs.

“Fine. I don’t need vibrators to orgasm, Myles.

They’re nice when I’m in a hurry or want to get off quickly.

But if I’m going to be living in your house where your scent fills the space and you intend to boss me around, I’ll be able to come just as fast by rubbing my clit with my fingers. ”

Bold words. My girl is getting feistier and sassier as her hangover wanes. I’m still quicker, sharper, and…older.

I slowly rise from the nightstand, cup her face with one hand, and tip her head back. My pinky rests under her ear. My thumb strokes her lower lip. I’m treading in dangerous waters. “Do you intend to test me, Madison?”

She swallows.

I move my thumb to her pulse point.

“Maybe,” she whispers.

“Are you sure you want to take that kind of risk?”

“What happens if you catch me fucking myself? You gonna tell my dad?”

Does she have any idea how her pushback affects me? I don’t think she’s ready for the kind of domination I like to impose over my submissives.

“You’re playing with fire, Madison. Be careful, or you might get burned. I don’t have to tell Hendrix that you fingered your pretty cunt to get you in trouble.”

Her cheeks turn pink. She swallows again.

I want to lower my nose to her neck and nuzzle her. I want to lift her sweater over her head and suckle her perky tits.

I’m an asshole.

She’s my kryptonite.

I look into her wide eyes. “How long have you been jonesing to have your bottom spanked, Madison?”

“Since the night you and my dad went to Edge while I was home for Christmas a few years ago. Neither of you knew I could hear you discussing your plans that night. As soon as you left the house, I started googling. By the time you got home, I knew more about kink and BDSM than I ever thought possible.”

My turn to flinch. I never knew about that. Shit. I’m not sure it matters in the grand scheme of things. Maybe Madison learned about kink at a younger age than she might have otherwise, but if she’s as submissive as she thinks, she would have found out sooner or later.

“Is that when you knew you were submissive?”

“Yes, and that’s when I knew I wanted you to be the one to dominate me.”

Fuck. Me.

The gloves are off. She’s not holding back.

“I’m twice your age.”

“I don’t care.”

There’s a shift in the atmosphere. What I say next is going to change everything. I’m weak.

The reality is Madison was mine before last night’s events. I was simply suppressing the truth. If I go down this path, there’s no turning back. It’s risky. Her dad will kill me when he finds out. Hopefully, not literally.

I’m not interested in a fling. If I take Madison on as my submissive, I won’t let her go. She’s not ready for that.

Can I mold her submission to echo my desires without bringing her into my bed? Maybe. It would give her the chance to test the waters and know herself better without committing.

She’s so young. What if she’s wrong? What if she finds out she isn’t able to submit the way I require? There’s only one way to find out. Teach her. Train her. Let her decide.

While keeping her out of my bed.

I release her and turn to zip up her bags before swinging them both over my shoulder. “Let’s go.”

“That’s it? You’re not going to say anything else?”

I grab the back of her neck and haul her close, enjoying the way her breath hitches. “Oh, I’m going to say a lot more, sweetheart, but how about we not do that here? Huh?”

“Okay.”

I nod toward the bedroom door.

“You’re really not going to let me have my vibrator?”

I chuckle. “I’m really not going to let you have your vibrator. Get in the car, naughty girl.”