Page 10 of Safe in Shadow (Pine Ridge Universe #22)

S he was a chatty thing, and the more she spoke in the steamed-up bathroom, the more his color changed. Lightened, until he was the light gray of shadows of dawn, instead of midnight black.

Are you dead?

Yes. Was. He wasn’t sure that was true now. He felt very much alive. He supposed living and dead were really states of soul, and his soul was still here.

Somehow.

Were you human?

Yes.

When?

***

Did you die in the house when it was used as a hospital after World War I? Or when it was a home for soldiers with combat fatigue in the 30s and 40s?

No.

When it was used for tuberculosis patients?

No.

Was it in the 1900s?

No.

And the more she asked, the more he remembered.

And the more they talked, the more he realized that this woman was something special. Something radiant and open, like the sunflowers that used to grow in the Miller’s fields, way down towards the little town.

Can you leave?

Nyx hesitated. No, he couldn’t. Not while the house was standing. He was bound to it. But if he told Grace that, would she ruin her work to set him free?

Did he want to be free now? Free would mean no more Grace. No more carnal delights.

Of course, if he left, if she burnt the place down or ran it through with a wrecking ball, she’d have to leave, too, and The Stranger wouldn’t find her.

“Sorry, touchy question. I wasn’t, like...trying to get rid of you. I mean... This is awkward. You’re pretty creepy, you know?”

What the hell was he supposed to say to that?

“That’s not an insult. More like a fact.

To humans, you’d be creepy. But if this is your home, we’re going to have to work out some kind of arrangement, because I’m trying to get guests in here soon.

You can’t be all tall, rippling shadow man in the corner.

Someone would die of a heart attack, and that’s bad press. Sorry, do you know that expression?”

Nyx rolled his eyes, but he didn’t think it was particularly visible. The human kept talking.

“Have you had other human friends?”

That one was easy.

No.

Was it just him, or did she look pleased at that?

“Oh. Cool. Well, umm... So, awkward question...” She twirled her curls around her fingers, got them tangled, and banged her elbow on the wall trying to shake her hand free.

He smiled. Clumsy, determined, persistent as sunlight.

His hand reached the glass before she was done cursing and rubbing her elbow.

Brave

“Brave or stupid? My parents would say this is a really dumb thing to do, to risk all my money on this... to move from Syracuse to Antonia, to live with my Nana on the weekends so she wouldn’t have to go in the nursing home.

..” Grace’s sentences trailed off, drifting away as the steam billowed around her, putting a sheen on her tanned face.

“I’ve risked it all on this. I can’t quit.

That’s not brave. It’s just how things are. ”

Trapped. He remembered feeling some sort of trap closing around him as well. What was it? This place... Staying here... Why did he have to stay here?

The warm body of a woman.

The rutting. The groans of pleasure. His loud, hers muffled and soft. After hearing Grace’s noises, the ones so fresh in his mind, these old memories now had a haze of doubt. Whoever she was hadn’t been genuine with her love. Or her lust?

Instead of mere confusion and drifting memories that wouldn’t hold still, today the woman’s image was less blurry.

Beautiful face. Full lips parted in innocent surprise. Dark curls framing rosy cheeks.

Hatred, red hot and then ice cold.

Killer.

“Did you have dream sex with me?” Grace whispered, and the world inside his head snapped away, leaving him wondering if the hatred and the word that was emblazoned in his brain were meant for the mystery woman, or for himself.

“I didn’t mind. I just want to know if that’s something we do? Because I’m not leaving. You can’t leave. Last night was awesome, and you can move furniture. So. Yeah. Was that a dream, or you?”

His letters were scrawled and shaky, his form unraveling.

Me.

Nyx felt himself pulled down and back, shrinking and unspooling like a bobbin of thread falling from a great height, unraveling all the way.

Until he was back beneath the bed, gnashing his teeth and clawing at the braver beasts trying to consume him.

Killer.

Am I the one bound here for my sins? Am I the killer?

The pale face with rosy cheeks branded itself in front of his eyes, and the rage and hatred filled him.

It was only when he heard Grace’s puzzled, plaintive cry of, “Nyx? If you want to see me again, I’ll be here tonight. I’m here every night,” that he realized where he was.

The voice came closer as he sank further, this time allowing the darkness of the void to own him, just a little. He wanted the fight. He ached for the slashing and biting he usually tried to avoid. He wanted to tire himself out and cleanse himself of the thing he’d tried so hard to forget.

“I hope I’ll see you in my dreams again,” Grace’s whisper seemed to come from the distant peaks of far-off mountains, but in reality, he knew she was just on the side of this strange cosmic divide.

He needed to be baptized by a battle that would drain every dark thought from him. That would exhaust him and make him forget.

I want to come back to Grace with a clear head.

And maybe a clean heart.