Page 210 of Ruthless Desires: Vol. Two

For most of the day, I keep trying to shake myself out of this god-awful dream. This can’t be right—this can’t be reality. It just doesn’t make sense.

Howdid we not see this coming? It was our responsibility to think of the worst-case scenarios. To be on the lookout for traps. But we were too sure of ourselves. It wasn’t naivety—we’re far past that.

This was foolishness. Stupidity.

By the time Ludo and Elliot’s conversation drifts into my bedroom, I feel like a ghost of myself. Physically I’m here, but I feel like I’m watching myself from outside my body. Like I’m watching this all happen to someone else.

I’m so lost that I almost—almost—miss what Ludo tells Elliot.

I need you and Rhett in good condition. Oliver, on the other hand…

Soon after that, I hear Ludo exit Elliot’s room and walk down the hallway. My chest tightens with every passing second. Why am I the odd one out? What does Holloway have planned for Ell and Rhett? And what does he have planned forme?

In a way, I already know the answer. Ludo doesn’t let traitors get away with anything. Eventually, unless we find some way out of here, we’ll end up dead. In the meantime, Holloway will do what he does best—cause pain.

And it sounds like I’ll be getting the brunt of it.

My tears start up again. They sting my eyes, and even as I try to stop them, more come.This is all my fault.Wren never would’ve gotten caught if it hadn’t been for me.

I don’t blame her. I couldnever.Wren did her absolute best to get the hard drive. Ultimately, it’s our fault for putting her in a position she wasn’t ready for yet. If it had been one of us, maybe we would’ve been aware enough to catch that Andrew was watching. But no, instead we gave the most dangerous part of the job to the least experienced out of all of us.

None of this ever would’ve happened if I’d justlistened.From the very beginning, I’m the one who always pushed for Wren’s involvement. That first weekend, Elliot was ready to let her go, and Rhett would’ve gone along with it. But I refused to go back to the way things were.

From there, everything snowballed.

I’mthe one who got Wren tangled up in the Williams job.

I’mthe one who helped get Ell and Rhett on board with Wren helping us spy on Ludo in Florida.

I’mthe one who insisted we could get Wren ready enough to pull off the heist at the wedding.

Elliot and Rhett were always hesitant. They wanted to keep Wren as safe as possible, even if it meant keeping her at arms’ length or leaving her on the sidelines. Of course I’ve always cared about her safety, but she wanted to be a part of our revenge plans. She wanted to be a part ofus,and I knew she was smart enough and strong enough to hold her own.

Even now, I still don’t think I’m wrong. We just pushed her too far too fast. We got too desperate—maybe too overconfident.

I just hope she’s safe.

If something happens to Wren, I’ll never forgive myself. She knew the risks of getting involved with us, but it’s not the same. We’ve been preparing for this for ten years. She’s only had a couple months.

What if I never get to see her again?

I know I’ll see Rhett and Ell again, even if it’s only to die together. But Wren… I’d give anything to hold her in my arms one last time—to watch her eyes light up as I tell her I love her.

When night falls, my heart is heavy as I turn off the light and sink onto the bare mattress. I’m not tired enough to sleep, but I don’t want to be awake. I’m drowning in the hopelessness of it all.

There’s really no escape.

I curl up and squeeze my eyes shut. Maybe if I think hard enough, I can trick my body into feeling the warmth of someone curving their body around mine. A hand on my hip, soft breath on my neck, soothing words floating through the air and lulling me to sleep.

But all I hear is a light tap against my window. Probably a branch moved by the breeze. It happens again, this time a little louder.

And then I remember that there aren’t any trees directly in front of my window.

Springing into an upright position, I peer through the darkness of my bedroom. I swear I see something move outside the window.What is that? A bird?

Quietly, I get to my feet and cross the room. As I get closer, there’s another tap, and I’m just able to make out the unmistakable outline of a hand.

Ell.