Page 23 of Run, Starlight (The Royal Ballet Presents #3)
MARCELLA
They both leave, and I stare at the white walls, Enzo’s cum leaking from my pussy and Lucky’s from the side of my mouth. When your captor asks what you want, anyone would say freedom. Maybe curse him to the high heavens.
I asked for dick. I begged even.
The feeling sits in the pit of my stomach, as if I betrayed myself.
I close my legs and sit on the bed, shaking as I rub my chest. Enzo keeps telling me to embrace the darkest parts of me, but he’s crazy, and his advice is the last one I should follow.
I assumed bad things happened to me because life is random, but maybe Fabrizio decided to kill himself in my bedroom because he knew the type of darkness I hid.
Tears fall down my cheeks, and I feel unclean, and it’s not because of the sex, but rather for me wanting it again and again.
The way I want it. I judge myself deeply in this moment, desperate to release all the bad sides of me instead of embracing them.
I was a normal kid until my brother killed himself in front of me.
I was just a ballerina when they arrived at my door and awakened desires I didn't know I had. I don’t want my destiny to be with two killers.
I sit with my feelings for a long time, but I'm still exhausted, and my eyes itch until I accept the sleep. My head falls to the white pillows, and I hug my legs, dreaming I’m someplace else.
The waves wake me up once again, and there’s no confusion this time.
I know the nightmare I'm in. The nightgown sticks between my legs, a crude reminder of what happened in this room. My cheeks warm with the memory, and I get up before I have a chance to feel sorry for myself once again. I find a bathroom that I missed the first time I opened my eyes, and I’m grateful when the shower works and the water is warm.
Another black nightgown is waiting folded on the bed, and I look around, trying to spot a camera or something. I shouldn’t be surprised that they know my every step, but I feel the tingling behind my ear and the feeling I’m being watched.
I’m surprised when I twist the doorknob and I can push the door open.
I expected it to be locked, but I won’t complain about my luck.
Soft carpet leads me to a wooden railing—to my right are three doors and to my left are two.
Stairs on both sides lead me downstairs, and the biggest crystal chandelier I’ve ever seen hangs right in the middle.
I look down and find Lucciano sitting on the couch, his head down with no Enzo around.
There’s no reason for me to feel drawn to him, but his sadness calls to me, so I go downstairs, my steps certain until he hears me and brings his head up.
“You’re awake.”
His voice is just as rough as the first time we spoke, when he accused me of flirting with Connor, warning me of the danger. It feels like it was a lifetime ago, yet no time has passed.
“Are you hungry?” he says when I stand there, watching him.
I lick my lips, shaking my head slightly. “What’s happening here? Am I your prisoner?”
Lucky rakes his hand over his dark short hair. “No. But we need to lay low.”
“You’re feeding into his madness.”
His eyes fall, and I wonder if he thinks about this a lot. If he blames himself for the things his brother wants and says. How much weight does he carry? I shouldn’t care, but I do.
“We were hired to look after Maeve, the prima ballerina. She’s married to someone very… important. Dangerous people are always after them.”
“That’s how you both had access to the theater and dorms. Okay.” I’m not sure why I say okay since it’s anything but. I have about a hundred questions about the prima ballerina, but who cares about her when I’m the one who was abducted?
“Enzo says that her husband knows he took you. That’s not something he’ll tolerate. We weren’t supposed to mess with the ballerinas. That’s why I agreed to hide you here. I might be soft with him, but I was going to stop this madness.”
His words are empty, and his sorrow means nothing.
In the end, he chose him and his brother over me.
He says they weren’t supposed to mess with the ballerinas, which means no one is looking for me.
I’m innocent in all this, yet I’m here. I hug my midsection, moving away from him and reaching the floor-to-ceiling window.
“Where are we?” Sand and water as far as my eyes can see. Nothing that I recognize, and while it’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen, I’m scared of his answer. I turn from the window and face him again, not giving him a chance to answer my first question. “Did you drug me?”
I know I must have fainted when I saw the body, but I know I didn’t that second time.
“Enzo…” He shakes his head.
Rage like nothing else grows from the bottom of my heart over to my throat, and I spit at him, “Is that your excuse for everything?”
“He drugged you. Cygnus?—”
“No,” I yell. “At least Enzo is honest about what he’s doing. You’re hiding under him.”
He stands, jaw set when he meets me under the chandelier. “I promised to protect him. I promised?—”
“You could have left me behind. Drugged or not drugged. You could have left me,” I spat.
I’m not sure why it bothers me so much, but I can’t stand him telling me this is all Enzo when he was there too. It was in his arms I fell.
“You wanted me to leave you? Drugged in the warehouse?” He shakes his head, taken aback. “Do you understand the type of men walking those halls?”
No, I don’t like the idea of waking up completely alone beside a body in that warehouse, but he needs to accept that he had other options. He chose to buy into this plan, so he can’t blame Enzo anymore. I won’t let him.
“I want you to take the blame here.”
He comes so close that my chest bumps into his. I feel hot under the nightgown, the vivid memory of sucking his dick while his brother fucked me is playing in the back of my mind but I’m so angry words fail me.
“You don’t think I feel it? I know I let Enzo do it all. I know I created?—”
“Oh god.” I roll my eyes and push against his hard chest. “About me! Not him! You made the choices. You want me, and you can’t say it. You can’t fucking say it. At least Enzo is brave.”
I’m done with him, done with his excuses. I push him one last time before turning around and leaving him behind.