Page 2 of Ruined Vows (Borrelli Mafia #5)

“Great!” I lie. I can’t share all the details of darkness in my life, but it helps me when I share what I can with her. She doesn’t want to hear my hard-luck life filled with money and prestige while she toils away raising money for innocent children.

In my eyes, she’s the real hero.

I hug her. “Long time no see.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” she replies as she pulls back. “You’re here for a fix?”

“Of course,” I happily reply.

“You can leave your purse here. I’ll lock my office.”

I set my pink bag on the floor under her desk. “We’re understaffed, but I’ll pull some strings on the baby wing.”

I turn and follow her to the second floor.

“What have you been up to?” I ask.

“Work, what else is there?” She chuckles.

I know she loves her job. She handles the grants for the center. It’s a low-paying job, but it’s a job she loves.

There are days I’m envious of her. She’s found her mission in life. And it’s a noble one.

Me?

I haven’t figured out what I want to do–yet.

I’m using the summer to decompress and think about my future. My ability to translate foreign languages is a plus. I can help my brothers with our foreign distributors and translate contracts because we import and export legitimate goods as a front for illegal contraband.

I’m considering earning a law degree, but I’m hesitant about staying in one location for four years. That’s partly why I loved living in Switzerland. It was convenient for a quick getaway. I could be anywhere in the world in a day.

My brother knows I change my mind like I change my clothes. I have no time for men because I move with the wind. Time is of the essence, and I must make a decision about my future soon, but I’m content with volunteering for the time being.

“How are you feeling? Are your nightmares subsiding?” Joanne isn’t one to pry. She knows I’ve had a trauma, but she’s safer not knowing the grisly details.

“No. I wish.” I sigh.

“I’m sure the babies’ coos will get your mind off it.”

“You’re the best.” I smile. My shoes click on the tile. “I’m so happy to see you. You’re amazing.”

The truth is, she’s the sister I never knew I needed.

We’re in different income brackets, but it doesn’t phase us. I buy drinks when we go out. She protests, but I insist.

I give her outfits and tell her they are collecting cobwebs in my closet, which would be true if they ever made it to my closet.

She’s a professional who attends events and, looking successful, helps raise money, or so I tell myself.

The truth is that I enjoy making the people I love happy.

“Here we are,” she announces as she puts a code in the electronic pad and pulls the door open.

I step inside the nursery. It’s a large room, and it breaks my heart that it’s filled with babies no one wanted.

“We just got a newborn yesterday. She’s over there,” she says, nodding toward the other side of the room. I follow her, and I’m anxious. Babies have an innate ability to turn me into a puddle of goo.

I’m an expert in martial arts, but a baby lays me flat out without even lifting a finger.

They are my kryptonite .

I pick up the tiny baby in the clear bin. Her face is a bit red, and her lips pucker as if she were going to cry.

“It’s okay. I’ve got you,” I whisper. My voice soothes her, and she nestles into my arms—her lips purse in a soft little O.

“You’re a natural. I’m sure you’ll have a large family one day.”

I chuckle. “They’re so innocent,” I say, marveling at Little Girl. I call them “Little Girl or Little Man. Names aren’t assigned unless they were known when they came in.

“Sit in the rocker,” Joanne suggests.

I sink into a nearby rocker, leaning forward. I place Little Girl in my lap. I move her into the middle of the baby blanket before I wrap the cloth tightly around her tiny body. Swaddling a baby is no small feat.

I marvel at her. She’s beautiful, sweet, and innocent. I lift her into my arms again, raising her to my cheek as I close my eyes. I inhale. I love the familiar scent of babies. I smile and nuzzle her soft, warm cheek.

“You can’t take her home,” Joanne teases.

“I know,” I sigh.

Joanne leaves me to talk to the caretakers, and I rock Baby Girl. I swear, I get more out of this visit than anyone can imagine.

She sleeps peacefully in my arms.

Joanne swings by. “I have to go, enjoy yourself. I’ll see you before you leave. Lunch?”

“Yes,” I say, my eyes brimming with gratitude.

She softly touches my shoulder before she turns and walks to the door.

I don’t know how long I sat, but my legs are stiff. I stand and walk around the room with Baby Girl in my arms. I talk to her, filling her head with the hopes and dreams I was denied as a child. I want her to go to a loving home.

I return her to her crib before I return to Joanne’s office.

“You look happier,” she says as soon as I enter her office .

“I am. Are you ready for lunch?”

“Sure.” She reaches for my purse, hands it to me, and stands.

“Where to?” I ask.

“The sandwich shop?”

I know she says that because it’s the only affordable place on this side of the city.

“How about my family restaurant? It’s free.”

She gives me a side eye, accusing me of manipulating an angle to treat her to a free meal.

“What?” I feign innocence.

“I’m on to you,” she replies, but when she smiles, I know she’ll agree.

“I’m eating for free, too. Seriously, it’s the best Italian food in the city.”

“You’re biased,” she smirks.

“Of course,” I deadpan.

“Fine.” We walk to my car, and she frowns when the door opens.

“It won’t hurt you, honestly.”

She gives me an unsettled look before she crawls into the car and sinks into the leather seat.

“This is new!”

“Yeah, a small gift to myself after the events we’ve yet to name.”

“Gotcha.”

We buckle our seatbelts, and the engine purrs to life.

Within minutes, we’re on the road.

“What’s new? Are you seeing anyone?” I ask.

“Not really. It’s difficult to meet a man, as ironic as it sounds.”

“Not at all. I know what you mean. They are either parasites who are looking for a woman to support them, or they are just plain weird. ”

“Tell me about it. I thought I would meet someone at a fundraiser, y’know.”

“Yeah, but they’re either married or have one foot in the grave.”

She laughs at this. “You got that right.”

“I’ll keep my eyes and ears open. You deserve someone who will appreciate you.”

“What about you?”

I sigh. “What I would give to have a man who knows how to make love to me… However, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. I’ve hit a dry spell.”

“You and me both. We’re decent-looking enough. We both have a great deal to offer. It’s a shame we’re sitting home on Saturday nights.”

“I know.”

It’s not that I’m opposed to having a boyfriend, but now is not the time to jump into something. I don’t know where I’ll be in the fall, and it’s unfair to start a relationship knowing I might leave the city.

I’m the only one in the family without a significant other. Sometimes, I feel left out, but I figure I’ll meet the right person when I’m older. I need to figure out my life before I live mine around someone else’s.

I’m not committed to anyone, and I’m sure this feeds the unsettled feeling in my gut.

“Do you know what you’re going to do next? Did you apply to law school?”

“I took the entrance exam. I passed.”

Joanne gushes. “Congratulations! I’m so proud of you. Did you tell your brothers?”

“Not yet. I’m not sure if I’m going to go.”

“You could be an adoption lawyer!”

I pull up to the family restaurant. We walk in, and I lead us to a table at the back of the room. It’s an old habit. My brothers have drilled me on it since I was seven. It gives me an advantage in the event of an attack.

I guess it’s better to see your enemy coming.

Not like Vukan, who stepped out of the shadows as if he knew exactly where I would be.

We settle into the table, and I order fizzy water. We quickly decide on food, and I order for us, using my native tongue. I glance at my watch. Joanne has to return to work. We’ll be hard-pressed to get back on time.

“I love romance languages. I wish I could speak more than please and thank you in Italian,” she says.

“Well, that one was easy for me.”

“I’d love to see Italy, too. You’re so lucky. You get to travel the world.”

“It can be lonely,” I state unapologetically.

“I’m lonely and live in one of the world’s largest cities. How pathetic is that?”

“Hey, you’re not alone!” I pour more water into our glasses and lift mine. “Here’s to a better hunting.”

She snickers but raises her glass and touches it to mine. “To better hunting.”

“With my luck, I’ll end up with road kill.”

Joanne all but spits the water onto the table. She places her hand over her lips just in case she sputters. When she’s recovered, she says, “You always get me. You and that snarky attitude of yours. Your future husband will have his hands full.”

“Yeah, like that’s happening any time soon.”

“You never know. You could walk out of here, bump into him, and be married in no time.” She snaps her fingers to embellish her point.

“It’s not in the cards, trust me.”

I’m returning to my condo when my phone beeps.

Matteo.

It’s a summons to the Borrelli compound.

A family meeting .

This isn’t good.

The last time he summoned, we were in his office, AKA the war room. I attended the meetings on the strategy to address our nemesis.

I don’t know why they conveniently overlook me. Just because I’m the baby in the family doesn’t mean I’m incapable of having great ideas.

They can’t speak six languages. I hold my own when we’re sparring, and I’m a great shot. They should be thrilled to have me as their sister.

But no, they only invite me into their world when it’s convenient to them.

I long for the day they see me for who I am.

A bright, capable young woman who is their equal.