Page 36

Chapter 36

M y fantasy of curling up in my bed again was the first thing to surface in my addled mind. Every thought was distorted; a jumble of words that made no sense. But the pictures in my mind were clear and colourful; Asher's face when he looked at me in that basement, and Hecate mewling at me for food when she had just finished her dinner. Penny, when she was laughing at me over a deck of her tarot cards. All of us having dinner at the kitchen table like it was a normal evening.

They calmed me; consistent joy in what was otherwise a confusing mess. But when the memories started to return of the Bishops trapping me in my old home, and torturing me in the basement, I could almost feel the agony again, and my grandmother's indifferent expression as Thornton heaped the magical punishments onto me.

The chains were wrapped around me again and I fought them, hoping to slip my limbs out of them so I could flee. But the manacles wrapped around my wrists too tightly, squeezing them uncomfortably, but not with the biting pressure I remembered.

Suddenly, the ground fell out from beneath me and I found myself falling. In this odd dream state, I half expected to fall forever, but instead I hit a fluffy rug on top of floorboards. My rug, if my fingers squeezing the fibres didn't lie to me. I opened my eyes and found myself looking at the space under my bed, dust and all.

I flinched as something brushed up against my face, but I instantly relaxed as Hecate curled up in front of me and licked my chin.

If this was a dream, I liked it. Better than the last one, anyway.

"Come on, help me get her up. She's going to give herself a brain injury at this rate." That was Priya's voice from somewhere above me.

"I told you, we need a straight-jacket. Then she can't hurt herself in her sleep." Edward's voice followed. "Actually, it might be useful for day-to-day, too."

It might have been my friend speaking and in all likelihood a joke, but the idea of being so tightly wrapped up had dread consuming me from top to tail. When a hand wrapped around my arm, I jerked it off and rolled onto my back.

Priya and Edward stood over me, but both jumped back a little when they saw me staring up at them.

" Finally awake." Edward grabbed my upper arms and dragged me off the floor with a grunt, sitting me on the edge of my bed. "We knew you liked long lie-ins, but this was ridiculous."

I nearly fell backward onto the bed when he let go of me, which was when the feel of what I was wearing struck me. Someone had put me in my fluffiest pyjamas and the scent of essential oils enveloped my sense of smell.

Even though I had saved myself from falling backwards, Priya grabbed my ankles and swept my legs back onto the bed, and I landed back in bed with a fluff-muffled thump.

"What's happening?" I asked. This actually seemed quite real.

"Your stupid act of self-sacrifice injured you so badly you've been asleep for three days." Priya sat on the edge of my bed, her relieved smile every indication that she wasn't nearly as mad as she wanted to sound. "Which means you're really behind on the dishes."

"And dinner," Edward added, as Hecate jumped up on the bed next to me. "Don't think we're letting you off easy because you were unconscious. Not an excuse."

I sat up and grabbed Hecate, pulling her into my lap where she curled up against my chest. Everything came flooding back to me; being trapped in the house, and enchanted so I couldn't escape...and Hecate and Asher's stupid act to join me. Hecate was okay, but what about...?

"Where's Asher?" I asked. Under normal circumstances, I would have had a heavy debate in my head about whether or not to ask them, for fear it would make me look desperate and weak. But I had to know if he was okay.

"Sleeping." Priya patted my leg. "I made him. He'd been waiting for you to wake up and didn't even nap. It was getting out of hand."

"So, he's okay?"

"He's fine. Don't worry about him. Or anything, actually," Priya said. "You'll have plenty of time to do that later."

What did that mean? But then I remembered what mess we would have left behind. The Bishops’ house would have burned down and neither they nor the Franklins would be any closer to getting the powers back I had stolen. Wherever they were right now, they were pissed, and probably plotting. Priya was right. I wouldn't worry about that for now.

But Asher...

Priya interrupted my attempts to worry about thrusting a glass of water at me. "Drink this. We've been keeping you alive with potions so far and we're running low on supplies."

I took it, my mouth too dry to deny her, and gulped down half the glass. The fatigue, aching muscles, thirst and hunger could have convinced me I'd been out of it for weeks, not merely a few days. When I finally lowered the glass and took a deep breath, I stared into the water.

"So… everyone made it out okay?" I asked. "Even...?"

"Even your dumb relatives, yeah." Edward had bent down and rested his hands on his knees.

Good. At least that meant they weren't also going to hunt me down for that, too.. I had technically set the fire, even if destroying that gods-forsaken house had given me more peace than I ever remembered. Just knowing that the house no longer existed made the weight on my shoulders lift a little.

"And I am so tempted," Priya said, pressing her fingers together into points which she then jabbed in my direction, "to tell you how dumb you are for doing what you did. Using a grimalkin's power and then overloading yourself so you knock yourself out for days? You nearly killed yourself."

I took another drink. It didn't matter what she thought of what I did. The fact all three of us had made it out alive was a miracle, so clearly I had done the only right thing. I was at peace with my actions.

"But," Priya continued, lowering her pointy hands. "I honestly didn't think you guys were going to get out of there. We were already discussing how to sledgehammer the wall open when you exploded it."

"Can't say I don't make a mark." I drained the glass and Priya took it from me.

"We didn't need proof. We already knew that." Edward backed up toward the door, gesturing wildly with his arms. "I'm going to get Penny. She's been worried about you."

Priya rolled her eyes as she set the glass down on the floor. "Figures. The two people who wouldn't leave your side are the ones who took naps at the exact time you chose to wake up."

I laid back down, the water sloshing around in my stomach. Hecate curled up next to me, tucking herself into the crook of my arm and resting her head on my shoulder. She stretched a paw out across my chest and dug her claws into my pyjama top, fixing herself there.

The second Asher learned I was okay, he would probably take off to his job again, anyway. It was probably for the best that I hadn't seen him when I woke up. Better that I didn't see him at all. I could live with the moments before I blacked out being the last I remembered between us.

I already felt tired again and closed my eyes just to block out what looked like morning light streaming in through my window. Just to preserve my energy for when Penny came in. Lie-in hangovers were bad enough, but I'd never slept this long before. I would need some serious coffee just to get out of bed.

When a pair of footsteps echoed up the stairwell outside, I heaved a sigh. This would have to be a quick visit, because I really needed a nap.

Priya's weight lifted off the bed and I opened my eyes, but instead of Penny, Asher stood before her. He had his leather jacket on, his phone sticking out of one of the pockets, and he had his shoes on as if he was ready to go somewhere. I swallowed the lump in my throat, but it stayed lodged there. Called it.

But the moment I opened my eyes, Asher hurried to sit on the edge of the bed where Priya had been.

"No," I muttered, and pushed at his arm. "If you're going to leave, then leave. Don't hang around here like you care."

Asher grabbed my hands to stop me pushing him, and he stared into my eyes, but I looked away. Hecate wriggled her way out from under my arm and Asher let go of me to grab her and thrust her at Priya.

"Take the troublemaker for a minute. We need to talk alone," he said.

"No we don't ." All the tenderness for him that I had felt at staying behind with me had vanished the minute I realised he had his shoes on. After all we had been through and he was happy to take off again.

"Two minutes." Asher turned back to me and the look in his eyes had me melting; sorrow, pleading, maybe even a little guilt. "Please?"

Hecate scrabbled around in Priya's hands, mewling, but Priya shushed her and gathered her in to restrain her with her arms.

"Take all the time you need," Priya said as she headed for the door. "It's about time you two had a chat."

I struggled up onto my elbows to glare at Priya but she returned it with a 'be nice' look that I couldn't stomach. Once she had shut the door, I tilted my head back to look at the ceiling. It felt weird being alone with Asher again in my bedroom of all places. And I didn't want to revisit the emotions it elicited in me. Not when they would only lead to disappointment again.

"Bea, I'm sorry I don't have much time, but I've got to-"

"Got to go, I know." I tilted my head forward again to glare at him. "Why did you even come in here if you're just going to-"

Asher pressed a finger to my lips and I silenced, revelling in his touch. Maybe it felt more intimate than he intended, but there was no humour, no irritation, nothing in his eyes to neutralise that feeling in me.

"I know I've messed you around," he said. "And said some horrible things to you. You haven't deserved a single thing I've done to you lately and every apology in the world won't make it better. I know that."

He paused to inhale a shaky breath, and swallowed hard. "I can't tell you why I had to end things between us, but believe me when I tell you I had no choice. It was nothing you did or were. If I'd had it my way, I would have never left you."

My head spun. This had to be a dream. No matter how real it felt, there was no way I had actually woken up.

"This is asking a lot, and I don't expect to gain any grace with you for being more transparent," Asher said. "But I need you to do one thing for me. Please. I need you to trust me and just go along with this."

I wanted to speak; to ask the flurry of questions that couldn't wait a moment longer. But Asher leaned in closer and cupped my cheek with his hand. All my inquisitive fervour smouldered away in the heat building inside me.

"I'm leaving," he said. "And I don't know when I'll be back, but every second I'm away I'll be fighting to keep you out of those people's hands. Just stay put, stay out of trouble...and remember you deserve so much better than all of this."

His finger left my lips, his other hand trailing to cup my other cheek, and he descended into a kiss that turned me to ashes. This wasn't like the kiss we had shared in the kitchen which had been a little more tentative; this kiss poured all the emotions I had bottled up for him in the past six months, and to my surprise, his did, too.

Tears trickled down my cheeks as I kissed him back. Too soon, Asher pulled away and wiped away my tears with his thumbs.

"Be as angry with me as you like," he said. "Just please trust me."

With that, he kissed my forehead, got up and left the room, leaving me in a torrent of my own tears and burning questions.