Page 31

RIOT

While we were at work, Creed was about to tell me about Mama’s condition but then Havoc walked in.

We decided to wait until we were at her house before he gave me the run down on what the doctor’s said.

Creed told me it was pretty much bad news, so on the ride here, I had been trying to calm myself.

But I was scared for her and angry for her.

I knew she was like this because of my father.

In that moment all I wanted was the touch of Allure. Everything about her presence calmed me down.

I hadn’t been back to Mama’s place since the last time she tried to throw Allure out.

Since she looked me dead in the eye and said that Allure would try to kill me.

But today wasn’t about that. Today was about learning what was going on with my mother.

Was it simply guilt driven depression or psychosis or was it something worse.

I climbed the steps slow, each one feeling heavier than the last. Not because my legs were tired, but because I already knew this wasn’t going to be a casual visit. Whatever waited for me inside that house, it wasn’t the version of my mother I’d grown up with.

I used my key and opened the door. The air felt thick and heavy. The windows hadn’t been opened in days. Despite this home being grandiose, something about it felt suffocating. The weight of the house sat on my chest making it difficult to speak.

I heard the floor creak under my boots, heard the way it echoed too loud in a house that used to be full of noise. This home was once filled with laughter, arguments, Sunday dinners and Holiday parties. But ever since my father’s death, there was nothing.

Creed was already there, posted up by the fireplace. He was looking down at his phone with that look on his face he always wore when something was eating at him but he didn’t want to be the one to say it out loud.

I dropped my keys on the foyer’s table and glanced around. “Where is she?”

“Upstairs,” he said. “She’ll be down in a minute.”

He looked tired. He didn’t look this way at work. It was as if being in this house zapped something out of me. And I could relate because it zapped something out of me too.

I sat down on the arm of the couch, elbows on my knees. “Talk to me.”

Creed exhaled through his nose, rubbing his thumb along the edge of his glass. “Doctor said it might be early onset Alzheimer’s. They’re not sure yet, but they see the signs. But it would explain her crazy ass moods. How her memory is slipping. It would explain the strange speech too.”

I didn’t say anything at first. I let it sink in. Let the words echo.

He added, “They wanna run more tests soon. We’re getting them ordered.”

“We’ll get the best doctors for her.”

“Of course we will. She deserves it,” he replied.

I leaned back and stared at the ceiling. “It ain’t Alzheimer’s though.”

Creed frowned. “What do you mean?”

I looked at him. “It’s guilt, Creed. She’s folding under it. This ain’t medical—it’s spiritual. Emotional. All them years keeping secrets. Playing blind. Letting shit go unsaid ‘cause it was easier to pretend.”

Creed’s jaw flexed, but he didn’t argue. Just watched me, waiting.

“She might not have known everything,” I said, voice low. “But don’t act like she didn’t know something. You don’t live with a man like Silas and be affected by his bullshit.”

“She loved him,” Creed said, almost defensive.

“Oh, I know. And look where that got her.”

He shook his head. “You think she could’ve done something to prevent it?”

“As far as the kids? I really don’t think she knew about it.

But she saw how evil he was to us. That nigga has almost killed us numerous times and we were his flesh and blood.

If he’ll do that to his flesh and blood, what would he do to strangers?

Then all the times he cheated on her? She just took him back because of his name and his money.

And now that shit is eating away at her. ”

“ You might be on to something,” he said.

We sat in silence, both of us chewing on the truth.

I didn’t hate our mother. That would’ve made this easier.

She’d been the one who held us after our father’s rages. The one who whispered promises in the dark that things would get better. And I think part of her believed them. But she was also the one who stayed. The one who saw enough and stayed quiet.

Now her silence was cracking.

And we were watching it split her apart.

“I just…” I sighed, running a hand down my face. “I don’t know how to feel. One minute I wanna protect her, and the next I wanna scream in her face. Tell her we didn’t need someone to save face, we needed a damn mother.”

Creed stared at the floor like it held all the answers he never got.

I sat back, arms folded, the ache in my chest growing sharper. “You think she’ll pull through?”

Creed shrugged. “She’s strong. Like you said, we’ll get her the best doctors. But I don’t know if she wants to.”

That was the part that scared me.

Because I could deal with decline. I could deal with memory loss and confusion. But watching someone give up? Watching the guilt eat them alive, day by day?

That was a different kind of grief.

And it hadn’t even finished killing her yet.

Footsteps creaked on the stairs, slow and uneven. Me and Creed went silent at the same time, like we were kids again, waiting for the hammer to drop. But it wasn’t our father’s heavy boots this time. It was our mother’s slippered steps. Still, the weight behind them felt just as sharp.

She stepped into the room like a shadow, wrapped in her silk robe, hair a wild, lips pressed together so tight they nearly disappeared.

There was something frantic in her eyes, like her body had made it into the room, but her mind was still somewhere else, trapped in a moment none of us could reach.

The second her gaze landed on me, she pointed. “Where is that evil girl?”

My whole body stiffened. “What?”

“That girl,” she said louder, voice rising like a kettle ready to scream. “The one you brought in here. The one who doesn't belong here. She's not who you think she is, Riot. You’re being blind. Just like you were with Malia.”

Creed shifted beside me, uncomfortable as hell, but he didn’t speak. I did.

“Why are you calling her evil?”

“Because I know who she really is!” she snapped. “And she’s going to ruin you, just like the last one. You’re too stupid to see it. She’ll betray you, just like Malia did. And this time? It’ll destroy you.”

I stared at her, something inside me fracturing. Her words weren’t just crazy, they were cruel. And worse, they were dressed in conviction, like she believed every damn syllable.

“You wanna talk about stupid?” I said, my voice low but lethal.

“You wanna talk about betrayal? Where were you when he was beating the shit out of us? You think my girl is evil but you knew my father was! Where were you when he left us with bruises and broken ribs, acting like it was all for our own good? You knew he was sick. You had to know. But you stayed quiet. You let him walk around that house like a king when he was a fuckin’ monster. ”

She opened her mouth, but I didn’t give her the chance.

“You let it happen, Ma. And now you got the nerve to stand there and come for Allure? That girl ain’t done nothin’ but try to rebuild her life. You don’t even know her. And stop bringing up that bitch, Malia. She had it coming!”

Her face twisted like I’d slapped her. Maybe I had. Not physically. But those words? They landed.

Creed stood, stepping between us, but it was too late. I was already turning away.

I stormed out the room, heart pounding, hands clenched into fists at my sides. I didn’t even register Abra coming through the front door until I nearly walked into her.

She stepped back. “Riot, hey. I was just coming to get those documents signed from Tessa.”

“Cool,” I muttered, brushing past her. “She’s in there actin’ a fuckin’ fool. Knock yourself out.”

I didn’t stop walking, didn’t give her the usual nod or fake smile. I was too wired. Too angry.

But Creed followed.

I heard his steps trailing me down the walk. “Yo, slow down.”

I didn’t.

“Riot.”

I stopped at the edge of the driveway, jaw clenched so tight it ached. “What?”

“You gotta let that shit go.”

I turned to face him. “The fuck are you talking about?”

“Mama’s not right, man. You know that. Her mind’s slipping, and she’s carrying all kinds of shit she doesn’t know what to do with. This anger you’re holding—it’s not gonna change what happened.”

“You think I don’t know that?”

“I think you need to stop punishing her for shit that was out of her control.”

My laugh came bitter and short. “Out of her control? No. Turning a blind eye ain’t the same thing as powerlessness.”

Creed didn’t flinch. “Maybe not. But she loved him. And when you love someone like that, you make compromises you don’t even realize until it’s too late. I’m not excusing it. I’m saying, it broke her. Just like it broke us.”

We stood there for a long moment, nothing between us but silence and breath and years of pain layered too thick to scrape clean.

He stepped in closer. “And that thing with Malia? Let it go, bro. She’s dead. I know what she did was fucked up but you still carry it like it happened yesterday.”

I loved my brother but he didn’t understand. No one really did.

But he wasn’t trying to school me. He wasn’t trying to win. He was just telling the truth.

And the truth was?

He was right.

I blew out a breath, long and hard. “Yeah. Alright.”

He clapped my shoulder once and turned back toward the house.

I stood there for a while, watching the wind whip through tree standing in on the massive property, trying to quiet the war still raging in my chest.

But only Allure could to that.