Page 64 of Riding A Cock-Horse

The only thing that I can seem to move is my eyes. I roll them towards Dr. Fuckface in horror.

What did he do to me?

The evil scientist answers my unspoken question.

“I've injected you with chironex fleckeri. It's what the box jellyfish uses to paralyze their prey—before they eat them.”

If I didn't know Doctor Fuckface’s nefarious plan to use me to breed freak animals, I would be concerned he planned on eating me himself. The jerk of epic proportions scoops me up like I weigh nothing and tosses me onto a bed.

“No need to restrain you this time,” he cheerfully points out. “Ahh, do you hear that?Silence.Someone should have paralyzed your mouth a long time ago.”

This is only making me want to punch his teeth down his throat. Surprisingly, I think he’d look better without any teeth. The mad scientist starts hooking me up to various machines, and I mentally flinch when he inserts the IV. I feel the cool liquid starting to flow through my veins and pray it's just fluids…the doc’s smug smile suggests otherwise.The sound of multiple machines doing their work beeps around me as a monster disguised as a man hums and checks the readings.

Everything seems to be going ok until he does one test. Dr. Fuckface swiftly comes over and withdraws some blood. He shakes the vial up and just turns his back to me—what he does with it, I don't have a clue. What Idoknow is that when he turns back around, the familiar look of panic is on his face. You know, like before—when he injected me with something he shouldn't have.

I don't like this look.

It didn't bode well for me the last time, and I highly doubt it'll bode well for methistime.

Dr. Fuckface dashes out of the room, leaving me alone to worry about what’s wrong now. It doesn't take long before he comes back with Dean Stiffdick. Both of them are talking loudly, not even bothering to disguise what's going on.

“We can't breed her!” the scientist is repeating over and over.

And he saysIramble.

“For fuck’s sake—why the hell not?” Dean Stiffdick demands.

Yeah,I mentally shout,why the hell not?

“Because,” the doctor sighs, handing Dean Stiffdick something. “She'salreadybred.”

My mind blanks at these words, and it takes me a second to process his meaning, but when I do, the realization punches me in my paralyzed gut.

God damn those saints of broken condoms, I'm pregnant.

THE END FOR NOW