Page 31 of Ride or Die (The Shores #1)

CHAPTER

THIRTY-ONE

CHRISTMAS

LAYLA

It’s Christmas Eve, and I am so excited to get home to give Colt a gift before dinner. I just hope he doesn’t find it stupid.

When I show up, he has already turned on all the Christmas lights and is placing his gifts under the mini tree in the corner, wearing his usual joggers and T-shirt. Thick, perfectly fluffy snowflakes fall outside, making it feel even more magical.

Colt turns when he hears me enter. “Hey, babe.”

“Hey,” I respond, hopping onto the bed and waiting for him to join me.

“What ya got there?” he asks curiously, craning his neck to look at the package on the bed.

“It’s a gift.”

Colt watches me cautiously, taking a seat on the edge of the bed as I shove it towards him with a mischievous smirk. He peels back the paper, and as soon as he sees what's inside, he starts laughing.

He holds it up in front of him. “Grinch pyjamas?” He smiles, showcasing his perfect teeth.

I jump off the bed, stripping out of my joggers to reveal I am wearing the exact same thing. His head falls back, and he bursts out laughing as I do a little dance, grabbing two Santa hats from my coat and throwing one at him.

“Matching Christmas PJ’s!” I cheer. He stands up and does not hesitate to join me, stripping out of his clothes and changing into the outfit.

“You’re lucky you’re so fucking cute,” he says with a grin.

I giggle as I put on my Christmas socks with bells, making me jingle everywhere I walk. He gets dressed and does a model pose, flexing his muscles, testing the strength of the fabric.

“How do I look?” he asks, giving me a sexy grin as I move back onto the bed.

“Fucking incredible.” I grin, reclining onto my elbows on the mattress.

He stops his display and hops onto the bed beside me, laying back on his pillow. I tuck into him, immediately knowing where to find my nook with him. He literally feels like my missing piece. I fit perfectly into his puzzle.

“We need a selfie of this.” Colt takes out his phone and puts it in front of us, snapping a photo. We look fucking adorable. “We are going to make gorgeous babies one day.” My face flames as he kisses my forehead, blushing like a schoolgirl at the thought of having his babies.

We lay there for a while, watching Elf as part of our Christmas movie lineup. Eventually, the food we ordered shows up, and we dig in, resuming our cozy spots in bed after eating way too much.

“I have never enjoyed Christmas so much, Colt. I used to work the closing shift on Christmas Eve, then I’d be up early to work a double shift on Christmas Day.

Same thing with New Year’s, just to make as much cash as possible.

It was so sad being the only person on the bus those mornings.

I’d always chat with the driver because I felt bad for them too.

Then, working in a quiet coffee shop as families shared the special holiday.

Missing all of it just to give my parents money.

” He traces circles on my arm as I speak.

“What a fucking waste that was,” I mumble. “This is the first year I deliberately took both days off, so I could spend them with you. No amount of money I could make today and tomorrow could ever replace the feeling I have in my little heart right now,” I whisper.

Colt says nothing, but his soft expression speaks volumes as he leans down to kiss me. It’s a gentle kiss. One that tells me he feels the same.

We snuggle in close, finishing the night falling asleep in each other’s arms to our third movie, The Grinch .

Christmas Day, we lay in bed until ten, make waffles with strawberries and bacon, and open our presents. I got Colt a new hoodie, a hat, and some new rags and cleaners for his car. He will get his lingerie gift after dinner. And he got me a new hoodie and joggers, slippers, and headphones.

He brings over the final present, and I open it to find a wooden box that has definitely seen better days. My fingers run across the scuffed surface of the wood, the old rusty hinges barely holding on.

Before I can open it, Colt’s hand clamps on top of mine, a serious expression on his face.

“You’re probably going to see some fucked up shit—I mean, you already have, but being with me comes with a lot of catches.

I do more for Williams than just steal cars.

I move drugs, I kick the shit out of people for information…

” He clears his throat, his eyes laced with shame.

“I’m not a good person on the outside, Lay.

I hate it, but I’m doing what I have to do to succeed and survive here.

I never want you to see that person, but the odds are high that one day you will.

I’m giving you this because this is the real me, and when you see the fucked up shit I have to do, please don’t ever forget about this box and who I really am.

Because you’re the only one who knows the real me, and when we get out of here, all this bad fucking shit I do will be done with.

I promise.” He looks down at the box, then at me, nodding for me to open it.

The hinges squeak in protest as I lift the lid, and inside are photos, notes, folded pieces of paper, and cards.

I pick some up, shuffling through each one.

There are birthday cards from his parents, letters to them, and an angry one to his dad after he left them.

Our geography project—he kept it just like he said.

I pick up a folded Post-it note and open it, reading out loud.

Dear Layla, You looked really pretty today in your sundress. You look pretty every day. Can I walk you home?”

My eyes shoot up to Colt’s. “Go on,” he urges with a small smile

The next one is a note from his mom.

Colton, I'm so proud of you. Thank you for taking care of me. Love mom.

The next one I pick out is red, shaped like a little heart.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Will you be mine?

I really like you, Layla.

xox Colton

My lip quivers as I pick up note after note of poems and love letters Colton wrote me over the years.

Dear Layla,

I am so glad I was the one to pick you up tonight and that I got you home safe.

Being in your company was really special to me, and it's time you know that I have liked you for a long time.

I have never known how to tell you how I feel about you.

Half of me never admitted it out of fear of rejection by you, the other half wanted to protect you from the world I live in.

I would do anything for you. I will give it all up for you.

If you just give me a chance to prove to you I can be the man you deserve.

He takes that one out of my hand.

“This was the most recent,” he says. “I never got to finish it. I wrote it after picking you up that night after the race. I looked at the box, at all these love letters you never got to read, and that’s when I decided I was done writing.

I was making my move. The next week, I saw you at the library and started trying to show you how I really feel about you.

” His confession makes my eyes fill with tears.

Never did I expect anyone to care for and love me the way Colt has from afar for all these years.

“It might be cheesy, but I always held onto things like this, things that meant something to me.

My mom always said love makes us richer than any material things ever could.

We never had much that was tangible, so it was my way of finding value in something, I guess," he says a bit shyly, shrugging.

"There are tons of letters to you, my dad, Mom, and even myself in there. It was how I dealt with so many feelings while I had to play this hard-ass on the surface. Whenever you doubt my feelings for you, or if you see me do some fucked up shit, remember this box. All of this, this is me,” he says, pointing to it.

“Not the asshole pulling business or the guy kicking the shit out of others. I made the stupid decision to do this shit when I was a kid, and now I'm stuck doing it despite hating it. I don’t want you to ever see me differently. You are the only one in the entire world who actually knows me. I’ve said it before, but you own me, Layla. I love you.”

Colt takes a deep breath, his eyes flitting between mine. Without another word, he leans over and wraps his arms around me, wrapping me in the most intimate hug.

“Thank you, Colt, for loving me all these years. For finally telling me and letting me into your world. I never felt complete until I found you. I will never hold what you have to do against you. I know who you are, and I am so damn lucky I am the only one who gets the privilege of seeing the real you.”

He rubs my cheek and pulls me down onto the bed, holding me until it’s time to make dinner.

Instead of the traditional turkey meal, we make a small beer can chicken with mashed potatoes and veggies, finishing with candy cane ice cream for dessert.

Colt even made his mom a plate, and she came up to join us. He takes such good care of her.

She’s always suffered with her mental health, but after Colt’s dad left and her cancer treatments, things got even worse. Colt is determined to convince her to come with us when we leave, but she wants to stay, still believing his dad will come back for her.

Jen’s visit is short, with her mostly shoving food into her mouth at his desk, completely focused on the TV.

“I’m glad to see you kids happy and that you have each other. Love is a beautiful thing. Cherish it. Merry Christmas,” she tells us before leaving for work. Her wise words make us squeeze each other a little tighter.

After today, my heart feels so full because, for the first time, I feel like I’m home. It’s not the place, but the people you’re with, and I’ve never experienced that feeling until Colt let me into his life.

Now, all that’s left is to show him just how much I appreciate him. And I saved the best gift for last.